The TV is shut off and I’m pulled into Bianca’s embrace as I sob over everything that I’ve lost. How many more times am I going to cry over him? When is it going to be enough? I’m grateful to Bee, she holds me until the tears dry up
There’s a knock on the door. I pull back and glance through my tears at Bianca, she’s frowning. We aren’t expecting anyone, the guy in the lobby never called us to let us know that someone was here. I watch as she gets up and goes to answer it. I quickly wipe away my tears and pull myself together.
“Jerald, is everything okay?” Bianca asks, but the man ignores her and walks toward me.
“Jerald?” I question as he stands in front of me.
“Bianca, will you please sit down? This impacts both of you.”
My body tenses at his words, and Bee sits down beside me. “What’s happened?”
His face breaks out into a huge smile. “I got a call this afternoon and I’ve just finished making the deal. I am looking at two of the new Tigers.”
“Fuck off!” Bianca gasps and I stare at Jerald in shock.
Being a Tiger is the highest point a model can get to. Tigers is the biggest lingerie brand in the world. The women who model for them are the most sought after and usually are the models that earn the most money.
“Nope. I told you ladies, you two are hot commodities. You two are going to be the biggest names in fashion.” He grins, “I wanted to personally give you both the news. Congratulations ladies.” He kisses both of our cheeks and leaves.
I stare at Bianca in shock, I’m not able to speak. Today has been a day of ups and downs, but this news has definitely made it one of the best days ever.
Chapter 8
Silas
“We did it!” Caston grins as he slaps me on my back.
“We sure fucking did.” I can’t believe that I’m here. That I’ve finally reached my dream. It’s bittersweet, knowing that I’m here and yet Payton isn’t. That fucking kills me but I hope that wherever she is, she’s happy. That’s all I want for her, to be happy.
Caston will also be joining me at Seattle Football. He got in on the second draft and Tate on the fifth. All my boys are with me and I’m fucking proud that we’ve managed to do it. We may not have known each other from birth but that doesn't matter. We’ve got a bond, one that’s unbreakable. To know that we’re all starting the next chapter of our lives together is relief. These guys have been with me through my shit with Payton, we’ve been with Tate through his break up with Kayley. Caston and Saya are on the rocks and it’s fucking with his head. He’s sure she wants out of the relationship, as she seems to be pulling away. Hopefully now that his future is secured he can sort that out.
“Tonight we celebrate.” Tate grins, “Then tomorrow we sort everything out.”
I shake my head, since his break up with Kayley he’s been worse than I have. I’ve been trying to find a way to rid myself of all memories of Payton and to do that I get drunk and find willing women and lose myself in them. Every time, I wake up the next morning feeling like shit and hating myself. It’s been two years and the woman who broke my heart still fucking owns it.
Tate though, he’s trying to prove a point: that she had him and now that she doesn’t he can have any woman he wants. That’s not my way of thinking. If I ever saw Payton again, I’d do whatever I could to win her back. Time hasn’t eased the pain of not being with her, in fact, it’s intensified so much so that it’s like I’m missing part of my soul.
“Sounds good,” Caston mutters, his eyes glued to his cell phone in his hand and a scowl on his face. “Fuck,” he says through clenched teeth. “She’s going to be the death of me.”
“What’s going on?” I ask. I thought Saya would have been here but she’s not.
“She’s not coming out tonight, she hasn’t said why.” He glares at the phone one last time before putting it into his pants pocket. “Fuck it. Tonight is about us.”
“Guys…” Mikey, our agent says. With his tone as a warning, I already know that I’m not going to like whatever the fuck comes out of his mouth. “You need to realize that it’s different now. You belong to Seattle Football, that means what you do reflects on them.”
Tate crosses his arms over his chest. “We know.”
Mikey shakes his head. “No, I don’t think you do. If you fuck up in any way you’ll be cut. Your places at Seattle Football aren’t secure. No one’s place is. So you’ll be watched on and off the field. Fuck up once and you can kiss your dream goodbye.”
“We’re not going to fuck up.” I glare at him. Does he think I don’t know this? I’ve worked hard for this. It’s in my grasp and I’m not letting it go. I belong with Seattle Football.
“Make sure you don’t,” he warns us. “You’re having a meeting with the coach tomorrow. Don’t be late.” He spins on his heel and walks away from us; his strides are long and brisk, telling me he’s pissed off.
“Fuck, I’m not losing this spot,” Caston tells me. “If we’re going out tonight, we’re having a few beers and then coming home.”
I nod in agreement. “We’ve worked too hard to fuck this up.”
Tate glares at us, “Pussies.”
I give him the one finger salute. I’m not losing my dream to anyone. No fucking way. There’s only one person I would have given it up for, but she’s not here so that point is moot.
When we enter the club, the place is full; it seems everyone and their mother are out celebrating tonight. We’re Seattle’s newest draftees and everyone’s glancing at us. After Mikey’s talk, I’m not in the mood to socialize and neither is Caston. Tate on the other hand doesn’t even hesitate, he’s already found a woman for the night.
“God, am I that bad?” I ask Caston when we make it to the VIP area.
He gives me the side eye. “You serious?”
I nod, “Yeah, man, have I turned into that much of an asshole since Pay and I split?”
“You’re worse man. Way fucking worse,” he says honestly.
Fuck, it shouldn’t hurt but it does. “Don’t hold back.”
He takes a swig of his beer, “Your girl is sweet. Everything I’ve learned tells me that. You think fucking every woman in Washington State is going to help you get over her? You think she hasn’t seen the paparazzi photos? The different women you have each night?”
“What am I supposed to do? Sit at home and wait for her? Be celibate?”
“Do you think she’s celibate?” he fires back with a smirk.
The thought of her and some other guy sends my blood pumping. I want to find whoever it is and kill them. She’s mine.
“That’s what I thought.” He’s a smug shit. “Look, what I’m trying to say is, you believe that you and Payton are destined to be together, much like Saya and I are. You think she’ll want to be with you after all the women you fucked?”
No, I don’t. Fuck.
“I’m not telling you how to live your life, but, you’ve got to think about the future. Whether that’s with Payton or not. You want to screw countless women? Then do that, just don’t act like a fucking asshole when you regret it in the morning.”
“Who’d have thought that you’d be the one to dish out relationship advice?” Tate says as he comes to sit down beside us, a satisfied smile on his face. Guess, he and his lady friend already found their release.
“Fuck you, asshole. I’ve a whole lot of home truths for your ass too, but I know that you’re not in any state of mind to listen to them.” Caston doesn’t even spare him a look.
“Cas, man, what’s going on?” This isn’t like him, while he’s speaking the truth about my relationship, he’s not usually this angry.
“You think the shit that you two have been pulling hasn’t been weighing on Saya’s mind? She sees how quickly you forgot about your women and thinks I’ll do the same to her.” He shakes his head. “Stupid.”
“Shit, man,” I say, feeling guilty, I’ve been absorbed in my own shit I’ve not been in his.
>
“Don’t, it’s fine. I’ll find out what’s going on with her. It’s all good.” He flashes me his smile and I know that he’s going to be alright, for now at least.
I finish my beer and look out at the sea of people gyrating to the music. “I’m not in the mood for this shit. I’m heading home.” I get to my feet and I’m not shocked to see Caston following me. Tate however hasn’t had his fill for the night. “Catch you later,” I murmur to him as I pass by him moving toward the exit.
Caston’s words are playing on my mind. If I do get the chance with her again, she’s really going to think I’m an asshole when she finds out how I’ve been treating women. I’d never do that to her, she’s different compared to the rest.
Fuck. My mind is racing, I need to find her. Now that I’ve finished college, I’ll get someone to do some digging. I want my girl back.
Chapter 9
FIVE MONTHS LATER
Payton
“Oh my God, Pay, have you seen them?” The pride and happiness that’s in Dahlia’s voice makes me smile.
“I saw them. I think I’m still in shock.”
Today my face graces billboards. Bianca and I knew it was coming. I’d been warned, but to actually see myself on a billboard is shocking. I was grateful to have my girl with me, basking in the joy that I felt. She’s been one of my biggest supporters and I couldn’t be more proud to have her as my best friend.
The campaign was set to launch in July but Angelina Serafini wasn’t happy with some of the advertising and it was set back to today. My nerves have been frayed as I’ve waited patiently for it to be unveiled. But I know that Angelina is over the moon at the end result. So far today I’ve had a call from her and Jerald, both of them are happy and Serafini has asked me to be the face of her lingerie brand.
“Are you okay about them?” I ask her as I nibble on my bottom lip. The pictures aren’t exactly clean. They’re extremely risqué. I’m in my underwear and even if I do say so myself, I look very sexy. I was shocked at just how beautiful I looked in them.
“Yes, you’re an adult now and if you didn’t want to do them, you wouldn’t have. I trust your judgement, Pay. The images are amazing and you look so beautiful.” She tells me and I can hear that she’s close to crying.
“Thank you.”
I wasn’t just worried about Dahlia’s reaction to the photos, I’m worried about Silas’. I know that I shouldn’t be, he’s not given me a second thought, but I can’t help it. Every decision that I make, he’s in the back of my mind and I wonder what he’d think; would he be proud of me? I’m just scared that he’ll see the pictures and hate me.
I’ve kept up to date with him and I’m so proud. He’s at Seattle Football just as he told me that he would. He survived the cut as did his team-mates that were in college with him and I’ve watched him live a few times, much to Bianca’s annoyance. She thinks that I should forget about him and move on. But the pain that I feel at the mere thought of moving on with someone else has me banishing the idea. I’m still in love with him and until I’m not, I can’t move on.
Dahlia’s words pull me back from my thoughts of Silas. “I’m so proud of you. You’ve achieved something others only dream of. I know this wasn’t what you had set out to do in life, but it shows me who the real you is. You give everything you have, no matter what you do.”
My eyes fill with tears, God, she always manages to turn me into mush. “Do you have any plans for Christmas?” I want to spend it with them, but Bianca doesn’t get along with her family and I don’t want her to have a crappy one.
“Yes, you are coming home.” There’s a bite to her tone, it’s a demand.
I laugh, “Of course I am, I was wondering if there was room for one more?”
“Of course, tell Bianca that she’s always welcome here. Where are you jetting off to next?”
“At the moment, nowhere. We’ve got the catwalk to do this weekend. Then next week, I have a shoot with Diamantello. Followed by a shoot with Angelina again, she wants me to be the face of her lingerie brand. I’m excited because being the face of Serafini lingerie is a coveted spot.” I’m giddy with excitement as I tell her my plans for the coming weeks.
All models want to be the face of Serafini fashion, whether it be the lingerie, the sports ware, or just the season campaigns that Angelina does. And she chose me. That’s a huge ego boost along with a major career jump.
“I can’t believe you’re going to walk the runway as a Tiger. Does that mean you get a discount?”
I laugh, “I’m not sure, but, Aunt Dahlia, if you want them, I’ll get them for you.”
She tuts, “You’ll do no such thing, young lady.”
Too late, I’ve already planned on getting her some for her Christmas present. Mary has also made noises about getting some too.
“I was wondering if you could get Bethan to babysit this weekend?” I ask. I have a surprise if she can get Bethan to do it.
Bethan has been Dahlia’s friend for years and has been a huge support for her when we all came to live with Dahlia; she still is. Whenever Dahlia has to work, Bethan is on hand to ensure the kids have food and have their homework done. I also have a special gift for her for Christmas, I may not have been around in a while, but Bethan is a big part of our family.
“Yes, I’m sure she could, why?” Her confusion is clear to hear.
“I have tickets for both you and Mary to come to the Tiger Fashion show.”
Being a Tiger is different than being a catwalk model. The photo shoots for the Tiger campaign are intense, even more so than any other I’ve been a part of. We’re to prioritize all Tiger events ahead of the rest and if there were a conflict to arise, Tiger campaigns take precedent. Luckily, I have Jerald who schedules my calendar and knows what a lucrative job being a Tiger is. So he’s schedules accordingly, working closely with the Tiger’s campaign planner to ensure there’s no clashes.
“Really?” she gasps.
“Yes, really, so what do you say?”
She’s crying now, her breath hitching every few seconds. “I get to see you, of course I’m there. Oh, Payton, thank you,” she says, once she’s able to get herself under control.
“I can’t wait to see you and Mary.” I know the boys are going to be pissed, but I do try and get home once a month if I can. It’s been hard on us all being away from each other, but I talk to them a few times a week. Since I’ve been away from home, the four of us have become a hell of a lot closer. I have a new found love for them all, and I’d do anything to make them happy.
“We can’t wait to see you too. Oh and they have no idea that you’re coming home for Christmas,” Dahlia says and I smile, this is even better. “They’re not very happy, as you can imagine.”
“I’ll whine about having to work to Mary while you’re both here.”
She laughs, “Good, because that’s all they’ve been asking is for you to be home.”
Honestly, that’s all I want too. I want to spend as much time with them as I can. Every time I return home everything's different from the last, Sebastian is growing like a weed, Tyler is turning into a teenager and Mary is stunning, she’s sixteen going on sixty. I’m missing so much, but I know that when they want to go to college or to travel, that they can without any worries.
The money that I’ve made from the last deal with Serafini has set up Mary’s college fund, she can go to any college she wants for as long as she wants. The money I’ve made with the recent deal with Tiger has set up Tyler’s and I’ve got half of what I need in Sebastian's. I’ve also set up my nest egg, I want to buy a house, a huge big house that is on the beach. One day, I’ll get to live that dream.
The front door opens and I turn to see Bianca walking in, her long black hair straight and hangs down past her breasts, she’s got a beautiful bright smile on her face and her bright blue eyes sparkle. Someone is in a good mood.
“Let me know what Bethan says and you’ll be staying with Bee and I,” I tell Dahlia
and Bee nods; we had already discussed it. I was happy to put them up in a hotel but Bianca wasn’t having any of it. We have a spare room, with no intentions of sub-letting and it’s empty for this exact reason, when family comes to town.
“No, we can get a hotel,” Dahlia protests, just as I knew she would.
“No, you’re staying here with us and that’s final,” Bianca says loudly having overheard Dahlia’s protests.
“If you girls are sure…”
I cut her off, “We are, I wouldn’t have suggested it if we weren’t.”
She sighs, “Thank you. We’ll be there. Expect a call this evening from a very excited Mary.”
I laugh, I can’t wait. “I will. I’ll talk to you soon.”
“Bye, baby. Love you,” she sings. She has so much happiness in her voice.
“Love you too.” I end the call and focus on Bianca.
She holds up her hand, “I don’t want to hear it.”
I smirk, “Uh-huh. Tell me, who is he?” There’s a reason she’s so happy, my beautiful girl found a man.
She grins, “He’s gorgeous, his name is Tate Hemmington. I don’t really know what he does, he just said he works in Seattle.” She’s giddy as hell and I love that she’s like this. It’s been a while since she’s shown any interest in a male.
“Tell me more, how did you meet?” Her giddiness is rubbing off on me.
“We met at the gym, he bought me coffee afterward and we spent over two hours talking.” She smiles. “He called me beautiful.”
Damn, he sounds like a keeper.
“When are you going out?” I ask, needing to know so I can buy her a kickass outfit.
She bites her lip and dread fills my stomach, “He said he’d call.”
I shake my head. If he doesn't call then he’s an asshole. “His loss if he doesn’t.”
Back With Me: A With Me in Seattle Universe Novel (Lady Boss Press Presents: With Me in Seattle Universe) Page 5