Elise

by Jackie Ivie

  “What have you done to yourself?”

  Elise lifted her chin to look at him down her nose. She lifted one side of her upper lip at the same time. “It’s none of your concern that I can tell.”

  “Can you walk to the carriage, then, or will you be needing my assist?”

  “I’d sooner touch a snake than a MacGowan clansman. Now, step aside, so that I can proceed. I’d not like His Grace thinking this delay is my fault.”

  Mick backed up a step, folded his arms, and cocked his head. Elise bit her lower lip between her teeth and stepped down the steps. Perhaps she should have requested water instead of lemonade. She could have used it to bathe the muck from her injured foot.

  She was hunched forward, and each step was accomplished in a gingerly fashion, but she reached Lord Kinley’s ceremonial carriage on her own power. Getting into it was a separate problem, though.

  Elise stood beside the small ladder and debated whether her injured foot would bear her weight long enough to reach the lower rung, or if she’d be better served trying to pull herself up onto it. She might have to ask Mick for assistance, after all.

  Colin forestalled her. “Put her in the carriage and stay this stupidity. I’ve better things to do than watch.”

  Elise cried out as Mick lifted her. His grip about her waist was painful, as was the motion of setting her onto the carriage floor at Colin’s feet.

  “Perhaps you would na’ be so weak if you ate what was given to you.”

  His unconcerned voice stiffened her back.

  “Only an idiot sends food and liquid to a prison with no comfort room, Your Grace. I’d have been stupid to eat or drink.” Elise forgot her own vow as she answered, and then felt like a fool. If it killed her, she was going to gain her own bench, and without any assistance, either.

  Colin answered with some of his Gaelic words. He was probably deciding her punishment for calling him an idiot, she guessed.

  Elise ignored him and slid her back to the opposite bench. If she pushed with her good foot against his bench, it wasn’t going to be too difficult.

  “Come along, then. I’ve na’ got all day to await your needs.”

  Colin stepped over her and leapt from the carriage. Elise closed her eyes in disgust at herself. The entire Honor Guard would be informed of her weakness, no doubt.

  “Do you need assistance, again?”

  It was Colin. He hadn’t any inflection to his voice. Elise masked her own. “I’d not accept it, even if you were the last—”

  “What have you done to your foot?”

  Elise hid it quickly beneath her hem, turned her head, and spoke to the bench at her nose. “When a man is ordered to escort a lady, and she trips on the way, he may want to stop and check why next time. It could be because she’s lost a shoe, and consequently doesn’t have any protection on her foot for the forced march on rough surfaces.”

  Colin frowned, and Elise hated herself for turning and looking at him long enough to know of it.

  “It was na’ my intent to harm you, Elise. You should ha’ said something earlier.”

  Elise wasn’t fond of his way of responding, especially the part about silencing her. She didn’t answer that. She didn’t have to. She met his eyes levelly and half-lidded hers, to take him out of focus. Then she looked away with as insulting a gesture as she could manage.

  “I’ll go for your woman.”

  Elise knew the tears in her eyes were from anger at herself. She blinked them rapidly away before Daisy arrived. She was embarrassed. In the first test of her inner strength, she’d found out she hadn’t any.

  Castle Kinlochlan wasn’t large. There were only two floors throughout, and she guessed at four in the great tower. Lord Kinley and his family occupied the first two floors. Colin’s party was being given the tower. Elise knew that much from the whispers she could hear. She also knew she was being stared at and openly gossiped over.

  Anyone with her recent marital history would be.

  That and Colin’s obvious treatment of her guaranteed it.

  Elise didn’t move her cloak and check, though. As horrid as she looked, it would simply cause more comment than any could fight. At least she wasn’t limping as openly and could keep up with the men all about her, encircling her like a shield.

  Daisy had helped Elise with her foot at Carlisle Station. It hadn’t taken long before she gained the carriage again. Colin had been waiting. She’d thought about thanking him but didn’t. He’d looked her over before turning his head. He hadn’t said a word. Elise returned the favor.

  It was chilly in the bedchamber Elise was assigned to. The water in her hipbath was cold, too.

  “I didn’t know you were his prisoner, Elise. You didn’t tell me.”

  “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Stoke the fire; it might warm this place a mite.”

  “There are four of his men outside this chamber as we speak. They all snap to attention whenever I open the door. They’re quite well-trained, like puppets. Would you like to see it?”

  “They’re members of his Honor Guard. We met this morning. His Grace is just keeping me safe.”

  “I don’t believe that, and you know it. Furthermore, there’s little that will dent the chill in this tower. It’s a Scot’s castle, and they all feel this way.”

  “How would you know?”

  “I’ve heard tales.”

  Elise was breaking one of her own rules. She never washed her hair right before a dinner engagement. Not only was it nearly impossible to dry, but it was unmanageable, too.

  Of course, she had no idea if she was attending.

  She had to take several breaths before she was brave enough to sink into the water. She was beginning to think she’d never warm. She wasn’t disguising how cold it was when she came back up.

  “And then there’s the matter of your wardrobe. I’ve not been given access to any of it. All I’ve got is this silver gown. It’s seen better days. What do you wish me to do with it?”

  “Leave it.”

  “Leave it where?”

  “Anywhere!”

  “If I tidy a room, I need to know how and where. This room is bare of just about anything. It resembles a cell. Oh, I forgot. You’re not being held prisoner. It can’t possibly be a cell.”

  Elise sighed loudly.

  “Well, help me out. It’s no cell, you’re no prisoner, you’ve no creams for your skin, no potions or hair picks for your coiffure, and nothing to clothe you with, save these soiled undergarments and a very soiled gown. Tell me what this looks like to you.”

  “Will you just leave it?”

  “The words or the gown?”

  “Both,” Elise replied.

  “You can’t just leave a dress like this lying about.”

  “Must you go on and on about it?” Elise asked bitterly.

  “I think it’s salvageable. It just requires a bit of an airing, and maybe a paste of salt on the worst stains. Give me a couple of days; you won’t even be able to spot them.”

  “Leave it. I’ll take care of it.”

  The maid cocked her head. “You? Did I hear right? You?”

  “I’ve got special plans for that dress, Daisy.”

  “This should be good. What are they?”

  “I’ll tell you later. Now, assist me. I’ve got to ready myself for the festivities. In case I’m attending.”

  “In case—!” The maid bit off the exclamation. “Very well, I’ll assist you; but I’ll have you know it’s under protest.”

  “Now what are you protesting?”

  “I’ve nothing to coordinate you with. No attire. Exactly what are you planning on wearing? In the event you’re attending, that is.”

  “They’ll send something up.”

  “Oh, that’s right. I’ve been told whatever you require will be sent up. How would they know what you require? What you feel like wearing? What color scheme we want to accomplish? Of all the nerve!”

  “Hand me some soap
, Daisy. I neglected to bring some.”

  “I’ve not got any, unless you consider the boiled lard and ash cake they gave me soap. It turned my hands red. I don’t think your skin will be able to survive it.”

  “Only one way to find out. Quit complaining and help me,” Elise said.

  “Not until you tell me what to do with this dress.”

  “Tie it in a knot. Toss it out the window. Save me the trouble.”

  “You wouldn’t! You couldn’t!”

  “Not only would I, but I definitely will.”

  “But it’s beautiful. Special. I’ve never seen—”

  “It’s a reminder, and there are some things I don’t want to remember. Thank you very much for helping me make up my mind. Bother this. I’ll wash my own hair. Hand me the soap.”

  “I’ll not be responsible for the damage.”

  “To what now?”

  “You. Why, they even took your entire trunk of creams and gels, out of my own caretaking. I haven’t seen it since. What am I supposed to rub into your skin? Use on your hair? Why can’t you have access to those, I ask?”

  “That’s a good question. I’m not sure. I might be able to rig up an escape tool, I suppose.”

  “I thought you weren’t a prisoner.”

  “I’m not,” Elise said, without inflection.

  “You only need escape if you’re being held against your will.”

  “You don’t have to accompany me to Castle Gowan.”

  “Don’t turn your sarcasm on me. I’ll not give you over to them. Not without a fight, anyway. They’ve never seen an English lady’s maid when she’s angry. They’d best watch their Scottish backs! That’s what they’d best do!”

  Elise giggled as Daisy began scrubbing her hair. She was right about the soap. It was harsh. Her hair would be like a cloud of white ash about her.

  “Will you be able to pin it up?”

  “The hair? You need worry over getting it dry enough first. And don’t you fret. I’ll have you back to the notorious ice goddess in no time. That’s my mission, and I’d never shirk from my duties.”

  “Oh, thank you, Daisy.”

  “Ice goddesses don’t cry, you know.”

  The maid’s voice had softened, and Elise pulled in a shuddering breath. “Yes, I know,” she whispered.

  When the knock came, Elise was ready. Her hair was still damp, and that made the tendrils about her face curl as they dried. There wasn’t a sign of the silver dress anywhere. She couldn’t even see where it had landed among the bushes bordering the tower. She’d had to wait until the tub was taken away, and Daisy was busy with her attire, to toss it. She was half-afraid the maid would try and stop her.

  She was wearing one of her older gowns, a simple affair in peach organza over cotton sheeting. It was something she’d wear to visit with women-friends, or for a morning of strolling about a country garden. It certainly wasn’t something she’d choose to wear to meet and dine with the influential families of Carlisle.

  She met Daisy’s glance in the mirror, and they both smiled.

  “His Grace must not want to see you at your best. That is a puzzle, to be sure.”

  “I look fine,” Elise replied. “A bit understated, but fine.”

  “Understated? You? Isn’t this the self-same castle that our great Queen Elizabeth had that Scot’s Queen Mary imprisoned in? And aren’t you married to one of their very own grand Scottish lairds? Yet they wish you gowned this plainly?”

  “The gown is fine. I wish I had my pearls with me, though.”

  Elise had purchased a single strand of apricot-hued pearls in France last year, when she should have been attending Evangeline at the birth of Rory. She put the thought aside the moment it surfaced and gazed wistfully in the mirror.

  “You’d think a great Scottish duke would know when he’d met his match. I have all your jewels, love. They’ve been in your reticule. Just let me go and get them for you.”

  Elise watched as Daisy opened the large tapestry-covered carpetbag. She had to blink the emotion away as the maid came back with not only her necklace, but the bracelet and earbobs as well.

  “There. An improvement, to be sure. I’m quite proud of you, I am.”

  “Do you want me to cry?”

  “Of course not. I want you to give them all the hell they can stand. Let me see if that Honor Guard is still napping at your threshold. Oh, bother. They’ve been joined by His Grace. Pardon me, Your Grace, we weren’t expecting you.”

  Daisy had opened the door, then slammed it shut again. Elise had to stifle her laughter at the maid’s actions. She had her face composed when the door opened again from the outside. Daisy was busily picking up the discarded towels and straightening an already straight bed. Elise was grateful she was there.

  “Thank you for being prompt, Elise.”

  Colin took one step into the room, and four of his men filed from behind to flank him. It was effective. It was obvious they considered her the enemy. What were they protecting him from, a bar of lye soap?

  Daisy snorted from her position beside the bed.

  He looked Elise up and down, then he frowned. “I dinna’ send jewels up.”

  “Inform His Grace that I’m wearing my own pearls.” Elise motioned to Daisy, who stood obediently and spoke for her.

  “Her Grace is wearing—”

  “I heard it, and I’ll na’ allow it. She already knows that. Take them off, or I’ll have them cut off.”

  Daisy’s indrawn breath spoke for her.

  “If she refuses?” Elise asked quietly.

  “I’ve a certain position in Scotland, as one of their lairds. It’s one of the oldest and most sacred of duties. All my countrymen are aware of my marriage by now, without receipt of clan permission. They also know I wed an Englishwoman, which is worse. I have nae choice now but to produce my wife at every occasion. Doona’ test that choice, for I will na’ hesitate to send you, under guard, to Castle Gowan, with the bastard, and let the gossips be damned.”

  Elise started unclasping her bracelet.

  “They’re just pearls, Your Grace,” Daisy said.

  “This is Scotland, Elise. Kindly tell your maid that in this country a man’s wife is his chattel, and her servants are his. They can be dismissed at my whim, and they will be.”

  Elise had pried the earbobs from her ears and it smarted. She ignored it. She was afraid Daisy would be sent packing if she said another word. The maid didn’t know what Colin MacGowan was capable of. She turned to the maid. “Thank you, Daisy. You may attend to Nanny and Rory, now.”

  Daisy met Elise’s eyes before she curtsied. She’d been asked to do the impossible, and Elise knew it. Daisy couldn’t pass by Colin and his men, but she didn’t say another word, either.

  “I am ready now, Your Grace.”

  “I see that you are.”

  Colin turned on his heel and walked out into the hallway. His men formed a line behind him. Elise walked past them with her head high. They were all wearing their kilts, and all the strange accoutrements that seemed to accompany an outfit of that nature. They were a barbaric-looking lot.

  That was the point, she was sure.

  They didn’t frighten her. She was The Ice Goddess, wasn’t she? Their laird was simply putting more ballast into her hatred of him. It was going to be highly enjoyable when he found out the truth. She might want to be around, after all.

  Chapter 19

  “What do you want?”

  Elise looked up from the chair beside the fire as the duke entered. Her words hid the instant fright the sight of him had caused her. He was wearing a long plaid robe with the MacGowan crest.

  “You sent for your maid,” he answered.

  “What of it?”

  “She’s na’ available to you tonight.”

  Elise’s heart sank, and she had to fight to maintain her color. He wouldn’t have dismissed Daisy, would he? And if he had... why? Elise had postured at being an obedient, quiet, and subservient w
ife at the sup. Lord Kinley had even complimented Colin on his choice of a bride.

  “Why not?” Elise looked down at her hands as she asked it. She was preparing herself for the answer. She knew she wouldn’t be able to hide her reaction if he was looking.

  “She’s tending to the bastard.”

  “He has a name, you know.” Relief was what made her words so harsh and quick.

  Colin didn’t say anything for so long, Elise looked up to see why. He had such a look of disgust on his features, she immediately looked back to her hands. She was grateful he hadn’t been looking at her and had missed her motion.

  “Your nursemaid woman was na’ up to a jaunt north. I let her go. Along with a nice stipend, I might add.”

  “You dismissed Nanny? You’ve overstepped yourself. He needs her. You have to hire her back.”

  “I’m afraid I dinna’ quite hear that. Perhaps you’d be carin’ to do a bit of a repeat?”

  Elise sucked in a breath, held it, and then spoke. “My mistake, Your Grace.”

  “I suspected as much.”

  How she longed to scream at him! Instead, she contented herself with examining her nails.

  “Now ...as to what I’m doing here,” he said, drawing out the words.

  “I would prefer to be alone.”

  “With nae one to assist you with your undressing? I’ve already seen how far that gets you.”

  Elise caught the sob in her throat at the brogue-filled words. She didn’t want any of those memories! She was more certain of it now than when she’d tossed the silver-starred dress from the window. She didn’t want any reminders of Colin MacGowan.

  “I’ll not allow you to touch me.”

  Silence greeted her whisper. Despite her every effort, Elise glanced sidelong at him from beneath her lashes. He hadn’t moved. He had a strange look on his face, too. She looked away quickly before she thought about what it could be, but knew she was too late.

  It was self-hatred. She knew it too well.