Never Say Never

by Tina Leonard

  The doorbell rang, startling Jill out of her thoughts. “I’ll get it, Eunice,” she said, wiping her hands on her apron. As an afterthought, she untied the apron and tossed it onto the plank kitchen table before crossing into the hallway.

  It was too soon to be her parents, Jill knew, but perhaps they’d skipped church in their anxiety to visit. She smiled and opened the door.

  The man she’d most wanted to forget stood on the porch. “Carl,” Jill said weakly, her bubble of happiness instantly bursting inside her. “What are you doing here?”

  Her ex-fiancé seemed supremely uncomfortable, not happy to be paying this call. Sheepishly, he replied, “I have to talk to you, Jill.”

  “I think we said everything that needed to be said.”

  “Aw, Jill. Can’t we discuss this?”

  “Carl.” Jill’s voice was stern. “I don’t think we should discuss anything more than when you’re going to get your things out of the apartment. How did you find me, anyway?”

  “Your mother told me. She doesn’t want us to break up, Jill. I’m sorry about everything…”

  “Sorry about using the secretarial pool as a dating service, Carl? After declaring your love to me?”

  She started to shut the door. He put his hand out quickly to stop it from closing. “Okay, okay, Jill. Wow. You don’t have to be such a bi—you don’t have to be so bitter,” he amended.

  “I’m having company in a while, Carl. Please say your piece and then make yourself scarce.”

  “Can’t I come in?”

  Behind her, Eunice cleared her throat. “Jill, I’m going to take Holly and Joey upstairs while I’m getting ready. You’re welcome to use the parlor, of course.”

  “Thank you, Eunice,” Jill said, turning to give the older lady a grateful smile. “Would you like an introduction?”

  “I shouldn’t think so, dear.”

  She couldn’t help feeling that Eunice was very much in her corner. “This won’t take long,” she assured her, before turning around with a sigh. “Come in, Carl, but wipe your shoes and please, don’t make yourself too comfortable.” She pointed to the parlor area.

  “Man, you’ve really got yourself a cozy place here, don’t you?”

  “None of this is mine.”

  “I’ve got to hand it to you, Jill. It looks like you’ve managed to land on your feet.”

  Jill gave an unladylike snort. Apparently Carl had thought she couldn’t survive without him. After she’d discovered he had roving eyes, however, she had known that in the long run, she’d be much better off without him. “I’m surprised you didn’t know me well enough to know that I can take care of myself.”

  He looked at her thoughtfully. “Ah, yeah. You sure are looking pretty, Jilly. You always were a helluva looker.”

  Jill watched without enthusiasm as Carl made himself comfortable on the antique sofa. That was her place, she thought angrily, a place that had come to mean welcome sanctuary during the times she fed baby Holly. Together, they enjoyed the quiet and the twinkling Christmas lights, which thankfully weren’t turned on right now, or she’d really have felt encroached upon. As it was, she deeply resented Carl’s intrusion into her life.

  “I look the same as I always did,” she snapped.

  “You can be such a pain, Jill. Here I am trying, and you’re not making this easy on me at all.”

  “So sorry. I wouldn’t want to cause you any distress, Carl.” She sighed, realizing that any further conversation between them was totally pointless. “I have people arriving any moment for dinner. You’ve come at a bad time.”

  Carl stood and started to walk toward her. At that moment, Dustin entered the room. Jill had never been so glad to see anyone.

  The change in Carl was immediate. He puffed up like a rooster, standing up as straight as he could, though he’d need an extra few inches in his shoes to measure Dustin’s height.

  “Heard there was company, Jill. Name’s Dustin Reed,” the rancher said easily, holding out his hand to Carl.

  “I’m Jill’s fiancé, Carl Douglas,” Carl replied quickly.

  Jill winced. That was not how she would have introduced him. “Not exactly,” she murmured, ignoring Carl’s frown.

  “It’s a mighty long way for you to come out, but…”

  “Oh, it was that,” Carl agreed. “Of course, I’d drive to the end of the world to be with Jilly.”

  Dustin crossed his arms, staring all the while at Carl. Jill’s ex looked visibly cowed.

  “We’re a bit busy with company coming out, as Jill mentioned.”

  “Yeah, yeah right.” Carl started scooting toward the doorway. “Well, I guess I’ll hit the road. It was nice meeting you,” he said to Dustin.

  “I’d like to say the same,” Dustin said.

  Carl looked uncertain as to how to reply to that. Swinging his gaze around, he said, “Jilly, walk me to my car?”

  “Come on.” Reluctantly walking in front to lead the way, Jill noticed that Dustin stayed behind in the parlor.

  They’d only made it to the porch when Carl’s anger exploded. “Who the hell does that guy think he is?”

  Jill made no reply as she gauged the distance to the sports car. She couldn’t get there fast enough.

  “I mean, his attitude stinks! That guy thinks he’s the Marlboro man or something. He acts like he owns you.”

  “Nobody owns me,” Jill said in a tense voice.

  He was quiet as he reached the car. “But the Marlboro man likes you, doesn’t he?”

  “Hardly.” She wasn’t lying. Dustin and she had a long way to go before they stopped acting like polar magnets.

  “I think he wants to get in your pants. Or has he already?”

  “Oh, for heaven’s sake!” Jill’s patience ran out like sand in an hourglass, except it had only taken about fifteen minutes. “Must you be so crude?”

  “Well, it’s obvious by the way he looks at you, like you’re a piece of juicy steak he can’t wait to sink his teeth into.”

  “Only you would compare a woman to a piece of meat, Carl. Please have your things moved out by Friday. I really must turn in the notice.”

  Carl paused, staring at her. “You’re really going through with this, aren’t you? You’re calling it quits between us?”

  Jill was surprised. Had he forgotten who’d required a stable of secretaries and temporary typists to satisfy him, though he’d sworn they hadn’t meant a thing to him once she’d found out? “Yes, I’m going through with this.”

  Slowly, he said, “I guess I didn’t think you would.”

  “I don’t understand. You thought I’d wait for you forever, like some virginal heroine waiting on her hero, until you’d had your fill of the spice of life?”

  Carl’s expression was considering, as if he was seeing her for the first time. “I thought once you lost your job, that you’d realize how much you needed me.”

  “I’m afraid I don’t get the—wait a minute. You’re not saying you had anything to do with me being laid off?” Jill was horrified.

  “Well, after you broke off our engagement, it occurred to me that if you were out of work, you’d think about us more seriously. I was hoping, anyway. So, I mentioned it to Lyle and the company had been looking for some jobs to eliminate…”

  She fought off the desire to slap him. Lyle was the personnel manager and obviously, Carl hadn’t wasted any time bending the ear of the person he knew could help him. “You are a snake. I don’t know what I ever saw in you. Go away before I kick holes in your car.”

  He didn’t like the threat to his fancy sports car because he instantly opened the door. “Think about it, Jilly. I wouldn’t have done it if I hadn’t loved you.”

  Disgusted, Jill turned and began walking away. If that was love, it was sick and twisted.

  “You’ll always be the only woman for me,” Carl called. The sports car roared as he started it.

  She told herself he wasn’t going to be the only man for her. Shakin
g, she walked inside the house.

  In the parlor, Dustin and Joey were talking about something on the tree. She needed about five minutes to compose herself before her parents arrived. Carl’s unexpected appearance had left her feeling weak and bitterly upset, so she tried to slip past the doorway.

  “Are you all right, Jill?” Dustin called.

  “I’m fine.” Jill wouldn’t have said anything else. She simply was too embarrassed to discuss it. “Thank you for trying to protect me.”

  “I wasn’t, I swear.” Dustin’s face was completely innocent.

  She shot him a jaundiced glance. “Please. I’ve just listened to all the baloney I can take in one lifetime.”

  Dustin shrugged. “Sorry. Maybe I was in a white knight mode, somewhat. Mother was waving the emergency towel at me, and I probably got carried away.”

  “The emergency towel?” Jill asked. Joey stared up at his father, listening.

  “Yeah.” Dustin’s expression seemed purposefully nonchalant. “Because I’m out on the east side of the property so much, she can’t reach me, especially in weather like this when her hips act up. We devised a system of hanging a dish towel out the window for certain times. Yellow for a phone call. Green for lunch. Red for an emergency.”

  “The towel was red.”

  “Yes. It’s only been red once before, and that was when my father had his heart attack.”

  “Oh, my,” Jill whispered. Suddenly, it dawned on her just how much a part of this family she was starting to feel like. Eunice’s and Dustin’s concern for her was heartwarming. Still, this situation wasn’t forever. “I don’t know what to say. I think I’m still feeling slightly overwhelmed by Carl showing up.”

  Actually, she was more disturbed by the emotions Dustin was stirring up inside her. He nodded at her comment.

  “I hope you don’t mind my butting in.”

  “No,” Jill said softly. “Actually, you do a very nice white knight impression.” She stared at him for a moment, realizing how very different Dustin and Carl were. Carl lived for pleasure of the moment.

  Dustin seemed a lot more solid. She took a deep breath, unwilling to think about how secure he made her feel. Yet, the very fact that the man she’d thought she loved had purposely cost her a livelihood that was important to her was deeply scary. She’d gotten extremely close to walking down the aisle, all the while thinking she’d known her fiancé, when she hadn’t. Dustin was given to silent moods and keeping to himself. How could she ever really be sure she knew him any better than she had Carl?

  As far as she could tell, Dustin found attachments difficult, even to his own son. It would be unwise to find herself in the same position twice. Carl’s traitorous behavior had stunned her, and even now, she found it difficult to believe what she’d heard with her own ears.

  Joey came down the stairs, came to stand shyly beside her.

  “If you don’t mind, I’m going upstairs to freshen up,” she said, tearing her gaze from Dustin’s. “Joey, why don’t you come with me? I’d like to slick that hair down, just a little bit”

  “Go on.” Dustin waved her away. “You need a moment to regroup. Joey will live without his hair being slicked. Besides, it wouldn’t last more than five seconds.”

  He ran his hand carelessly over Joey’s hair, instantly making the fine blond strands go awry. Jill didn’t think he even realized he’d mussed his son’s hair in a fatherly and affectionate gesture. She forced a smile to her lips, thinking that Dustin was right. Joey would be fine, and she wanted to go upstairs and take a moment to indulge in some deep breaths.

  Nodding, she turned to go upstairs. The doorbell rang, and Jill halted, knowing her parents had arrived. She didn’t want them to see her like this, anxious and no doubt having some runaway mascara around her eyes. Not for anything did she want them to think she was unhappy at the ranch.

  “Go on,” Dustin said, his voice rough. “I’ll stall ’em.”

  “Thanks.” Jill didn’t take a second more to express her gratitude. She flew up the stairs, feeling immensely guilty for dumping her duties on Dustin, but badly needing to force herself back into the pleasant mood Carl had stolen from her.

  Dustin flung open the door, Joey at his heels. “Marsh. You old buzzard. I should have known you’d get here first.”

  The sheriff walked past him after wiping his boots on the mat outside. “Yep. Hated to think you might not have anyone to help you set out the hors d’oeuvres.”

  He pronounced it hors-doevres. Dustin had to grin. “Eat them, you mean. Anything you’re supposed to set out would never make it to the table.”

  “Exactly. That’s what I said.”

  “Well, you came too late, then. Jill’s had everything ready for hours.”

  “She’s an organized little thing, isn’t she?” Marsh dumped his Stetson on Joey’s head, much to the child’s delight, as he walked into the parlor. “So, there’s the ornery twig that caused so much trouble.”

  Dustin ignored his friend’s glee. “Don’t start, my friend. We’ve had plenty of excitement here today without you kicking up some dirt, too.”

  “What’d I miss out on?”

  “Just the ex showing up. Nothing more interesting than that.”

  “Hm.” Marsh looked around the room at the big Christmas tree and the smaller version. “Don’t guess the mistletoe got him any better luck than it did you.”

  “I don’t think so.” Dustin left the Christmas room, knowing Marsh would follow him into the kitchen. “Jill was more upset to see him than I thought she might be.”

  “Really? Still harboring feelings, is she?”

  Dustin sat down at the table in a leisurely manner that betrayed the fact that the same thing had crossed his mind. “Seemed to have her hand planted pretty square in the middle of his back, pushing him out the door.”

  “Well, you never know with women. They don’t know what they want.” Marsh grabbed a soda from the fridge and sat down across from Dustin. The sound of the can being opened was loud in the sudden stillness.

  Dustin considered his friend’s words. Women didn’t always know what they wanted; men didn’t, either. Jill had been upset, but not pining upset for that city boy. He briefly wondered what she’d seen in her ex-fiancé, then asked himself what she might see in him, any better than that city boy.

  He wouldn’t let himself think about it. “The guy had some coconut-smelling stuff in his hair. I could smell it five feet away. Oh, hell, that reminds me. Joey, come here!”

  His son ran into the room. “What?”

  “I forgot Jill wants your hair slicked down.” He ran his hand under the faucet to get it wet and mashed it across the cowlick. “There. That ought to do.”

  Joey instantly ran his hand through it, undoing Dustin’s handiwork before running up the stairs. Marsh laughed.

  “She’s changing you already, friend.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Dustin glowered across the kitchen.

  “I never saw you do that before. Heck, you’ve never acted like Joey was much more than your shadow. Jill must be working on you.”

  “You’re fixing to uninvite yourself from Sunday dinner, Marsh,” Dustin growled. “I may have been a little slow in the fathering department, but I don’t see you being too eager for a bunch of rug rats, either.”

  “Nope. Can’t see it myself,” Marsh said cheerfully. “I do see Jill being hellaciously beautiful with a big nine-month belly, though.”

  “Yeah?” Dustin sat down again, unwilling to be drawn into what he knew was Marsh’s attempt to rile him. “Don’t reckon she’s going to get pregnant, so I guess you’ll have to miss out on the show.”

  The doorbell rang, interrupting what Marsh’s next jibe would have been. Dustin crossed into the hallway and opened the door.

  “Howdy, everybody. Come on in,” he said, taking Mrs. McCall’s items from her hands. Beside him, his mother appeared. “Mother, this is Lana and Bob McCall, Jill’s folks. Bob, Lana, this
is my mother, Eunice Reed. Jill’s finishing dressing, but she’ll be right down,” Dustin said, taking the things into the kitchen. He could hear the greetings his mother was issuing and Joey’s little feet thundering down the stairs to greet the newcomers. In the hall Marsh stood waiting to be introduced.

  “This is our local sheriff, Marsh,” Dustin said, giving him a slight shove into the hallway. “My best friend since way back.”

  The McCalls shook Marsh’s hand and he beamed at them. “The Reeds have been looking forward to your visit. I think you’ll find your daughter is in the best of hands,” Marsh said.

  Lana looked a little startled, Dustin noticed. He shot a frown Marsh’s way. “Have a seat in the parlor, please. I think Jill’s set out some snacks for us.”

  “Your home is beautiful,” Lana told Eunice.

  “Thank you. You’ll be interested to know that your daughter is responsible for the festive atmosphere in this room.” Eunice pointed to the various holiday decorations. “We so appreciate you letting us have her for a while. She’s brought so much happiness to our home.”

  “Oh, I’m so glad.” The delight on Lana and Bob’s face was easy to see. They were crazy about their youngest child. If they knew that Jill’s ex had been by just moments ago and how badly he’d upset their daughter, they’d have a fit.

  Dustin cleared his throat. “I’ll go check on Jill and see if she needs any help with Holly,” he said.

  The truth was, Jill was taking longer than he’d expected. With the additional ringing of the doorbell, he was certain she’d have hotfooted it downstairs. Maybe she needed a good, strong shoulder to lean on more than he’d realized.

  Dustin went upstairs, hesitating outside her bedroom door. He knocked lightly. She didn’t answer, so Dustin walked to Joey’s room. There was no Jill, no baby Holly being readied in a last-minute frenzy in there.