by Alexa Davis
Just as I was walking toward the cash register, Mack waved me over to him on the other end of the store. When I got there, he handed me a box too big to fit in my cloth shopping bag and a sack that jangled like it was full of metal of some kind. Finally, he handed me a book about leatherworking.
“Is this bag full of leatherworking tools?”
“Ayuh. Thought you might be ready for a new hobby.”
“How much is this going to cost me?”
He sighed and folded his arms. “Well, if you actually work at it, it will save you all the money you give me to do your leatherwork. If it’s just a little hobby, it will cost you for whatever leather you buy. All this,” he gestured to my armful of goodies, “is my gift to you. You made us all proud on that stage. I have every intention of putting the pictures we took up on my walls to promote my leatherwork and the store, so don’t get too misty over a few tools and an instruction manual.”
I glanced down at what had to be a couple hundred dollars in product. “Vicky going to let me out of the store with these?” I teased. Vicky was Mark’s long-time girlfriend and partner in the store. She spent her days in the front, running the registers and chatting with customers, and for a woman over fifty, she was in better shape than most people half her age. Something they usually found out when they tried to steal something from her precious store. I grinned at a memory of her taking a kid down by the collar, only to turn around and give the teen the supplies he’d been stealing, after he showed her some of his work. Now, that kid was on the cusp of fame and still only shopped at Vicky and Mark’s store for all his canvases and tools.
“Yeah, Vicky pre-approved the gift.” Mark chuckled. “But, she’ll be glad that you asked.”
I smiled at my bundle and shook my head. “It may take me a minute to get a piece done, but I know just where to set this up in my work room.” I thought for a moment. “But, now I have to Uber a ride home, unless you have a bigger bag I can borrow?” Mark snapped his fingers and disappeared into the back room. When he returned, he had a large knapsack in his hands. In went the box, the book, and the smaller bag of tools, and I carried the rest to the front of the store. As Vicky scanned the items, I slid them into the large backpack with the rest, thanking her for the gift. I knew it was probably her idea to give me something. Vicky was a woman who had no children, but adopted every lonely soul she met.
I told her about Jackson, and how crazy I felt for inviting a total stranger to come meet me after several days of talking. I expected her to scold me for being reckless, but she reminded me that lots of relationships that started in person ended in heartbreak. “Besides,” she added after thinking for a moment, “weeks of talking before you meet is better than a drunken bar-hookup.” I scoffed and agreed. I had never been one for hookups, and I was happy that Jackson didn’t count as one.
I went home after a couple of quick stops for things I actually did need, grateful that the backpack gave me the extra shopping bag room for food for both Stiles and me. I kept wanting to text Jackson, but I was determined not to look clingy or needy, so the phone stayed tucked away in my purse until I emptied the groceries into the fridge, filled the cat bowl with stinky chicken pate, and set up my leatherworking kit on one end of my work table.
I grabbed the phone to take a picture of my new setup for Vicky, and saw that Jackson had left me a couple of texts. My pulse sped a little at the selfie he’d taken on his horse. Damn, the man was like a Hollywood cowboy, rugged and hot. I immediately repented for my raunchy thoughts when I saw the next picture: a selfie of him with his mom. The mountains were behind them, and even though she was smiling, it was tinged with sadness at the edges.
In return, I took a picture of my new leatherworking center with Stiles in the center of it, since he was sniffing out the new tools and leather. It wasn’t nearly as pretty as the pictures he’d sent, but the more of him I saw, the more I realized that could very well be us. I might have been the model, but he was definitely the pretty one. Then I glanced back over my shoulder at the costume draped over the mannequin in the center of the room. I couldn’t wait for him to see me in it. I took a picture of the bodice and wings, but deleted the message before I hit send. He’d be in the room, in person, soon enough. He could see it then.
A glance at the clock told me it was time to get the stream going, but I really didn’t want to work. I wanted to straighten the apartment, deep clean the stuff I usually ignored unless company was coming, and figure out how to get a bed in the bedroom, so I’d have somewhere to sleep. I felt the heat of a blush rise in my cheeks, even though I was alone. No, it wouldn’t do me any good to assume that he’d want to throw me down on the first available soft surface and ravage my body... But, a girl could hope.
He was late to the stream, but I didn’t mind. It was just as fun texting him between notifications and telling him about stream drama as it was having him online seeing it in person. In fact, it felt nice, feeling like I could talk to him about work, because he wasn’t there to see it.
After a couple of hours of occasional texts, and screenshots of the massive debacle that was the viewer-run stream, I felt brave enough to send him a text that was more personal than I’d been before.
“I can’t wait to see your face.” I regretted it them moment I sent it, sure that he’d think I was an idiot, since he’d sent pictures before. I almost added, “in person” to clarify, but a text had already come in from him.
“I can’t wait to put my arm around you on the sofa.”
My chest got tight and my mouth went dry. Heart in my throat, I replied, “I can’t wait to hold your hand.” It wasn’t exactly what I was thinking, but I was trying not to keep it light, even though my thighs ached and things low in my stomach tightened as an image of what I really wanted filled my head.
“I can’t wait to kiss you,” he sent.
My heart pounded. “I can’t wait for you to undress me.” I hit send, and swallowed hard. It was too much, I’d gone too far, as usual, and ruined it. I cursed and tried to pay attention to the game at hand, grateful that for the viewer controlled stream, I’d chosen not to be on camera.
The phone pinged and I ignored it, afraid that he’d shut me down, or been embarrassed, or pulled back. It was exactly what I would have done if our positions were reversed. I had a date any day of the week, if I wanted, and I was chasing a man who lived two thousand miles away, who obviously wasn’t going to be hurting for company either. The reminder notification dinged again, and with a curse, I turned the phone over.
“There are so many things I want to do to you, for you, that I can’t list them now. Later, when I’m not sitting at dinner with my entire family and crew trying to not get turned on thinking about you, I’ll give you the full list. Hint… it’s long, and it gets dirty.”
I gasped from the heat that rushed to both ends of my body simultaneously. It couldn’t focus on the game, and just put it on auto-follow to the nearest viewer while I wriggled in my seat, and took a few long drinks from my bottle of water. Unbidden images of all the things I thought he might want flooded my brain. He’d warned me that he wasn’t alone, and I knew that meant I should stop. But I couldn’t leave it at that. I thought for a couple of minutes. What was I really looking forward to the most? It wasn’t the sex that, apparently, we’d be having, or showing off my setup to a fan of the stream, or even having company. I smiled and picked up my phone.
“I can’t wait to lie next to you and feel your arms around me just holding me, and feel happy because you’re there.” I hit send before I could change my mind, and put the phone on silent. I needed to work, he was with his whole damn ranch full of people, and I’d never met a man yet who wouldn’t be uncomfortable seeing that on his phone from a woman he’d never met.
“Good job, C.J.,” I said under my breath. “Way to go the extra mile, just to chase a nice guy off.” I cursed, and blamed it on a dumbass who had gotten everyone killed in the game. It was strange, and comforting, the way I c
ould focus on the stream after that. As it turned out, avoidance was great for my concentration. I just hoped that when the stream was over and I ran out of ways to avoid him, Jackson wanted to talk to me at all.
Chapter Eight
Jackson
I fought off a hard-on all through dinner, and finally put away my phone to avoid embarrassing myself. Damn the woman was perfect. Her first text had been so sweet and had felt so honest in its simplicity, that I could have sworn I felt myself falling for her as I read. And every word we’d typed after that had felt just as honest. But, I couldn’t afford to sit in front of all the guys, who were watching me like hawks anyway, and tell her what I thought about when I thought of her. In the shower, in bed, and hell, I hoped she never saw my browser history, because lately, there was a lot of her, in very little clothing. Knowing the sound of her voice, the way she giggled, with those almost-naked pictures, had given me a laundry list of ways I wanted to touch her.
At the end of dinner, I glanced at my phone after dropping a load of plates off in the kitchen as I carried a 12-pack of beer back outside for my brothers as we sat around the fire. Mom had forced George, Logan, and Tucker up almost every other night since I told her I was leaving. I would’ve complained, but I really enjoyed us all hanging out together. It was especially nice spending time with George and his wife, Callie. She’d been his high school sweetheart, then his savior, and now they were married and she was hugely pregnant and apparently loving it. She waddled over to the outdoor sofa, put her feet up on the ottoman and winked at me. I handed her an iced tea Patty had sent out for her, and asked her how long she had left.
“Two months!” George called out from across the veranda. “Can you believe she has two whole months left?”
I glanced at Callie and she rolled her eyes.
“I don’t know what he’s expecting, but I’m grateful I have a little time left.” She raised her voice so George could hear her as she continued, “Maybe we’ll get around to painting the nursery in the two months we have left.” I sniggered and shook my head, and Callie patted the seat next to her.
“Do you think this is weird, me going out to California to maybe get into a school that I haven’t even got in touch with, and maybe stay there?”
Callie shrugged and sipped her tea. “I don’t think there’s such a thing as ‘normal’ for how to do things. Look at your brother. He was a horse man, then a construction worker, then a soldier. And then there was the two of us. How the hell did that work out? But, it did, and it’s really, really good. I expect that you’ll have more of that than not, in your future. But, you’re young. Even if it doesn’t go as planned, or if you don’t have a plan and stuff just happens, in the end, it all works out.”
I nodded and pulled out my phone. “I know you’ve heard I have a friend there.” She sat up and nodded. I unlocked my phone and saw C.J. had sent one last message. I felt my ribcage get tight as I read her words. I probably would never tell her, but no one had ever treated me like I was that important. It was enough to make my eyes burn a little and I coughed to clear the unexpected emotion from my throat. I flipped to the pictures I’d saved to my phone, and handed it to Callie.
“Go ahead and scroll, I promise there’s no surprises.” I teased as she chewed the corner of her mouth.
“I remember her. She was on television, right? Some celebrity reality show or something?”
I nodded. “She’s won modeling competitions, performed on Dancing with the Stars, and she does a lot of hosting at gaming conventions, sports events, the whole nine yards.”
Callie pursed her lips and handed the phone back to me. “Wow, she lives her whole life in the spotlight. You ready to see your face on television and YouTube?”
“Even if we found out we were, you know, compatible, I doubt I’d be the one in the spotlight. I’m okay with that.”
She laughed. “I think you’re going to be just fine. But, don’t be surprised if she wants to try making something with you work. The Hargrave men tend to attract women who are ready to stick around.” I laughed, then thought about the text she’d sent. “You’re young, but of all of your brothers, you are the most headstrong. I don’t think you’ve ever encountered an obstacle that even slowed you down. Stanford will be no different.”
“Well, if there’s one thing I understand about life, it’s that nothing is impossible to break, if you pick at it enough. Worth remembering for the things you want to remove, and the things you want to keep.”
George and Danny sauntered over to grab more beer and George scoffed when he heard me. “Man, that is some deep truth for a guy who’s not even graduated from college yet. I wasn’t worried about you leaving before, but now, I can’t wait to see what you do while you’re gone.”
Logan let out a “Here, here!” from his seat at the big dining table where he was building a puzzle with Danny’s wife, Rachel.
“If I had it to do over, my money would still be on you being more successful. When are you leaving, anyway?”
“Couple days. Why? You want to take me to the airport?”
“Shit, I can. Did you want a ride? I figured Mom would take you.”
“Yeah, she would’ve but then my mom will have driven me from our house to the airport.”
There were barks of laughter from my older brothers and George ruffled my hair. “Just when we thought you were too old to be the youngest.” I shook him off and scowled good naturedly.
Callie had me hand my phone over to George so he could look at the pictures and he gave a low whistle. “You don’t aim low, do you boy? Why are you only telling us about her now?”
“There’s nothing to tell, George. You only know because I was stupid enough to tell Danny, and he thought it was hysterically funny that I was checking out Stanford, then checking out a model I’d been talking to.” George laughed hard, and high-fived Danny after he handed me back my phone.
I sat through several more minutes of good-natured ribbing, grateful that the ranch hands were gone before C.J. came up. When I had finished my second beer, and my brothers were starting to make noises about going home, I said my goodbyes and headed up to my room. Out of habit, I started up my computer and grabbed a beer from the mini fridge by the desk. I sat looking at my phone for a long time. I liked what she’d said, but there wasn’t really a response for it. What was I going to do, reply with “Awww?” I’d be looking for a new place to stay for the convention if I did that.
Finally, I sent a simple, “Me too. That might be the best part,” and put the phone away so I could focus on C.J.’s stream and zone for a bit. I may have drifted off a little, because I blinked and suddenly realized I had more texts. I read through them, then replied to C.J. in her stream chat.
“No, I haven’t packed yet. Yes, I will be packing tonight or tomorrow morning.” I paused, then added in all caps “YES, I AM EXCITED.” I knew she’d seen it when she snorted then cleared her throat and composed herself. I logged off before she finished her stream and got out my luggage. I wasn’t sure what she expected to take time or thought. I packed like a dude who didn’t cosplay, so it took less than fifteen minutes. I texted her that I was done, and that I needed to get to sleep, but I’d talk to her sometime before I left for California.
I laid in bed, with my stomach in knots. Finally, right at the last second, my nerves got the better of me. I texted C.J. and told her that she had exactly twenty-nine hours to cancel if she had any second thoughts. I worked on unclenching my jaw and trying to relax. I must have stressed myself right to sleep, because the next thing I knew, I was waking up to a coffee from my mother, and a text from C.J., with an electronic boarding pass attached. The text said that I had approximately six hours to get my ass to the airport. She’d moved up my ticket, and upgraded me to first class, compliments of the guys who wouldn’t stop trying to out donate each other in her stream.
I sat up and glanced over at the coffee on the nightstand. Mom never came to my room before noon, and it was only ni
ne in the morning. Luck was with me today. I dragged myself out of bed and into the shower, and ran it cold at first to help wake me up. I was excited to see C.J., but I felt like I was wading through wet sand. By the time I’d turned up the heat on the water, it hit me. I was headed to California to attend the biggest game developer convention in the country.
I finished a whole lot faster than I’d started, bolted my coffee while still in my towel, and finished the last of my packing. I left my luggage in the foyer and went in search of my parents, and Daniel, in that order. Fortune found him again and they were all in the office, going over midyear numbers and finishing up some pretty yawn-worthy paperwork to close out the cattle drive from the highlands.
“Hey, everyone I wanted to talk to, all in one room. What were the chances?” I announced my arrival and hovered near the door.
“Good God, what time is it?” My dad checked his watch. “Why are you up?”
“Thanks Dad, great talk.” I sighed and rubbed my face. “I’m leaving in about two hours. I just thought I’d come down and say goodbye. So, nice talking to you. I guess I’ll see you around.” The old man frowned and turned back to his paperwork, and I stared at Daniel, controlling my breathing and clenching my jaw to stop myself from saying anything else.
My mom put her arms around me and hugged me tight. It surprised me to realize she only came to the center of my chest. We weren’t a demonstrative family, but she seemed so little it was hard to believe she was the boss around here.
“When did you get so tiny?” I asked her. I heard the accusation in my voice and instantly regretted it, but she only laughed.
“About the same time you got huge, I would guess.” She chuckled. “I think you might be taller even than Tucker, and your shoulders are as broad as George’s. Who would’ve thought my baby would be the giant of the family?”