Mostly Sunny with a Chance of Storms

by Marion Roberts

  ‘Come on, Sunny,’ said Carl. ‘I said keep out of his way, which ultimately means keeping Willow from annoying him. She’s not the easiest dog, now is she?’

  Willow, asleep on the floor next to the heating panel, lifted her head momentarily when she heard Carl say her name.

  ‘It’s okay, Willow,’ I said. ‘I’m on your side.’

  Granny Carmelene’s kitchen had a dishwasher. (Not like at our old place, where the dishwasher happened to be me.) And there was a pantry you could walk right into, lined with jars of yummy preserved fruity things that hopefully we’d be having with ice-cream. Seriously, the pantry was so well stocked that if there ever were some type of war or famine we could survive for at least ten years without ever needing to leave the house.

  I moved a few things around to make a good spot for Willow’s big tin of dog pellets, then I helped Mum make a dressing for the salad, and even got to be the first one to use Granny Carmelene’s whiz-bang salad spinner.

  All without feeling the slightest bit sad. I had to hand it to Bruce and Terry. They really were top-rate bouncers.

  I remembered the day Granny Carmelene and I had tea by the river, and that made me think of when I wagged school and Granny Carmelene and I had lunch at the Hopetoun Tea Rooms. But I didn’t get sad one bit.

  I just thought about the chocolate eclairs and the chilled chicken sandwiches and how Granny Carmelene let me go to the spell shop too.

  All that got me thinking about Bruce and Terry. If they were that good, maybe they could also do something about Settimio.

  5.

  ‘Bags the turret bedroom! Keepings off!’ Lyall yelled the next afternoon as soon as he saw our beds had been delivered.

  We’d just got home from our first day of catching buses all the way across town to school. Before I could even yell out, As if! Saskia burst through the door too, and I nearly collided with her as I flew up the stairs two at a time.

  Unfortunately for Willow, Mum stopped her from following us. Mum was talking about making upstairs a no-go zone for dogs (which we all knew would never work, but we had to let her at least try and then fail).

  ‘Come on guys,’ shouted Carl, as Saskia thumped up the stairs behind me. ‘Remember what I said about seeing if you can come to some sort of mutual agreement!’

  To be honest (and I do try to be honest these days), I felt like I deserved first choice of bedrooms. I mean, Granny Carmelene was my flesh and blood grandmother after all. Lyall and Saskia had never even met her. And if it wasn’t for their dad latching onto my mum, and them being all tragically in love, and us becoming all modern and blended, Lyall and Saskia would still be living at their Mum’s place, and I wouldn’t have to be one bit community minded.

  Luckily, I had a plan to make sure that everyone mutually agreed with me. Have you ever heard of Reverse Psychology? It’s all about acting as though you’re taking a stance about a particular something, while knowing that by pretending, you’ll be actually encouraging another person (in this case, Lyall), to take the opposite stance. I could give you lots of impressive examples of Reverse Psychology but that would mean I’d be getting off the point so if you’re really interested, try googling Tom Sawyer and see how he got all his friends to paint a fence.

  I had to restrain myself from racing up into the turret after Lyall (because a key factor to being successful at Reverse Psychology is nonchalance, which basically means looking as though you don’t really care – kind of like how Claud behaves when she likes a boy, not to mention her fake laughing). So I stopped on the second floor. Saskia walked into the big bedroom next to Granny Carmelene’s old room. (Nobody was allowed to have Granny’s room; it was going to be for guests, once we’d sorted it out.)

  ‘I just love this room,’ I said (white lie), standing by the window. ‘Imagine waking up every morning and looking out at all those roses.’

  ‘Me too,’ said Saskia. ‘This room is my absolute favourite.’

  ‘Oh, really?’ I said in a despondent way, looking disappointed. ‘I kind of think it’s a bit grown-up for you. And not very arty, if you know what I mean.’

  Lyall burst through the door. ‘Yep, the turret is definitely the room for me.’ he said. ‘It’s a boy thing.’

  ‘That’s not fair!’ whined Saskia. ‘I might want the turret, or Sunny might. You got the best room at Mum’s!’ Saskia looked to me to back her up.

  But instead I said, ‘It’s the perfect room for you, Lyall. Besides, I’d be too freaked out to sleep up there. Probably wouldn’t get any sleep at all.’

  ‘Why?’ asked Lyall, still puffing.

  ‘Yeah, Sunny,’ said Saskia. ‘Why?’

  ‘Oh nothing,’ I said, in my best nonchalant voice. ‘Just something Granny Carmelene told me, but it’s probably not true. Anyway, all old houses have those freaky stories. Especially houses like this one, you know, with portraits that talk and all.’

  ‘Eeew! Don’t tell me any freaky stories. I want this room,’ said Saskia, blocking her ears. ‘I don’t care if it’s not arty.’

  Lyall and I headed for the turret.

  ‘Tell me, Sunny,’ he said, as we made our way up the stairs. ‘What did Granny Carmelene say to you about the turret room?’

  I took my time to answer him, peering through the telescope and aiming it towards the high branches of the cypress tree.

  ‘Tell me, Sunny!’

  ‘Sorry? This thing sure is difficult to focus.’

  ‘The story, Sunny. What did she tell you?’

  ‘Oh, that.’ I said turning away from the telescope to face Lyall. I dropped my voice down to a near whisper and leant in close. ‘Bats, Lyall. That’d be the story about bats.’

  Lyall looked slightly disappointed.

  ‘Apparently they circle the turret at night. Granny said they’ve even been known to smash through the windows. I guess ’cos they’re in search of blood.’

  ‘Get real, Sunny! We’ve got fruit bats in Australia. They’re not after blood.’

  My nose was practically touching Lyall’s. ‘You just don’t get it, do you, Lyall? They’re called fruit bats because they can smell the fruit in your blood. So you accidentally eat a few too many dried apricots, or you have a bit too much pineapple on your Hawaiian, maybe even just a bit too much juice … I tell you at any moment in the middle of the night a freaking bat could smash through your bedroom window. Not that it would effect you though, Lyall. You hardly eat much fruit these days. You should definitely have the turret. I’m just letting you in on the deal, okay? Don’t complain when it actually happens.’ I pointed my finger at him, just like Terry does.

  ‘As if, Sunny! What do you take me for?’ said Lyall, holding his ground. ‘Next thing you’ll be telling me the word gullible has been taken out of the English dictionary.’

  ‘Really? Has it?’ I asked. ‘Who told you that?’

  Lyall laughed hysterically, and even punched my arm.

  ‘Yeah right, Sunny! Talk about gullible!’

  ‘I do believe we’re having our first fight, Lyall,’ I said, straight faced, to conceal my embarrassment. I held onto the throb in my arm where he had hit me, hoping my gullibility wouldn’t affect this most critical stage of Reverse Psychology. ‘Maybe you’d like to punch my other arm too, Lyall?’ I said, hoping a little more nonchalance would get us back on track.

  ‘What’s so funny?’ yelled Saskia from downstairs, which was perfect timing as I needed a reason to casually leave.

  ‘I’ll be there in a sec, Saskia!’ I shouted back. You see, I was about to implement the Walk Away, which is the absolute key to making Reverse Psychology a success. Mind you, the Walk Away isn’t easy. It takes solid commitment, because no matter how badly you might want something, you have to have the strength (and nonchalance) to simply turn your back and walk away.

  ‘Okey-dokey then, I’m out of here,’ I said, turning to go downstairs. ‘I think I’ll go for the room opposite Saskia’s. It’s a girl thing. It’s also closer to th
e kitchen, ’cos I’m planning on having midnight feasts, not being one. I’ll tell Carl to bring your bed up to the turret, shall I, Lyall?’

  ‘I haven’t decided, Sunny. We’re finalising it at dinner, like Dad said.’

  You’ve got to admit that’s just the sort of answer someone would give who wasn’t as keen as he had been when he started.

  At dinner, when we were all sitting around one end of the kitchen table, Carl said, ‘Well, I take it by the peace and quiet around here that you guys have made a decision?’

  ‘I’m having the room overlooking the front garden!’ said Saskia.

  ‘And I’m having the one across the hall from Saskia,’ said Lyall.

  ‘Great,’ said Mum. ‘And you Sunny?’

  ‘Well, I did want the one opposite Saskia, but since nobody wants the turret, I’m thinking I might go for that.’

  Lyall gave me the eyebrow and said, ‘What about the bats, Sunny?’

  But I just gave him the eyebrow straight back and said, ‘I used to think the turret was kind of spooky, but now I’m thinking it’d be pretty cool …

  6.

  All that Reverse Psychology meant I had forgotten to collect the firewood for the library fireplace.

  ‘Sunny, I’m sorry but you’ll just have to go and get some now. It won’t take long,’ said Mum, screwing pages of old newspapers into balls. ‘Saskia didn’t have any trouble remembering to gather the kindling.’

  ‘But it’s really dark, Mum.’

  ‘Well, perhaps that might help you remember next time, Sunny. Now go on. There’s a head-torch in the laundry cupboard; you can use that.’ Mum clapped her hands like some type of a school mistress, so I made a point of making my way out extra slowly, just in case the hand clap was something she was thinking of adopting.

  I put the head torch on and adjusted the angle of the lamp so that it threw a circle of light in front of me. The grass was already wet with dew as I made my way down to the woodshed. Willow circled around me. ‘Stay close, Willow,’ I said. ‘It’s cold and dark and we’re not going for a walk, okay.’

  Once the wheelbarrow came into view, Willow started barking furiously and growling as though it was some type of strange animal.

  ‘Shhh, Willow! It’s just a wheelbarrow, silly,’ I said. ‘Come here and sit.’

  But she continued barking and pacing so she’d be ready to pounce the moment it started moving. Meanwhile, I stacked it full of logs from the top of the pile. I clicked my fingers next to my side and Willow did a wide arc around the wheelbarrow and sat up tall next to me so I could give her a pat.

  ‘Good girl,’ I said bending down a little to reach her. ‘You’re such a funny dog, Willow. You don’t like the big mean wheelbarrow at all do you. You’re just a—’

  ‘That dog no good!’

  ‘Jeez!’ I yelled, turning around to see Settimio’s feet right behind me. I adjusted my lamp until it shone square in his face. ‘Do you always go around sneaking up on people? You frightened the heck out of me and Willow ‘

  Willow barked at him, because dogs are really good at sensing bad people, even if her next step in dealing with the bad person is usually to bolt and leave me alone to possibly get murdered.

  Settimio leant back on one of his crutches, freeing the other one to wave about in a warding-off kind of way, towards Willow.

  ‘No dogs here. Dogs no here. Understand?’ Settimio actually roared. All the veins in his neck throbbed out and even his bald patch had gone red with rage. Willow hid behind me and buried her nose in the back of my knees. I glanced over my shoulder to see if anyone might be watching from the house, but I was completely out of view.

  ‘Come on, Willow,’ I said calmly, making sure I had hold of her collar. I turned back towards the house. ‘We’ll come back for the wood later. With Carl,’ I shouted backwards at Settimio.

  ‘You keep that dog tied up. Comprendere?’

  We were almost at the back steps when I heard Settimio call out, ‘You keep dog away or you be sorry, little girl! You be very sorry!’

  I double-checked that neither Mum nor Carl were in the kitchen or anywhere in earshot. Then I yelled at the top of my voice, ‘You’re a mean old man, Settimio, and do you want to know what’s worse? You’ve got hairs growing out of your ears! Understand? HAIRS!’

  Willow cowered, as if she thought perhaps I was angry with her.

  ‘It’s all right, girl,’ I said. ‘You just stay away from him a while, okay?’ I ushered Willow inside and slammed the back door as hard as I could behind me, even though Settimio was probably deaf and wouldn’t be able to hear me.

  ‘Well, thanks, Mum,’ I said, safely back inside. ‘Settimio creeps around in the night and who knows what else. I couldn’t even get the wood because he frightened me so much, and he said Willow has to be tied up or else I’ll be sorry. That’s a threat Mum, a threat! And I’m going to make a note of it because I bet he does heaps more creepy stuff, and in the end the police are going to be asking all sorts of questions about Settimio, and I’ll be able to tell them the exact times and the exact dates because I’ll have a creep-list about ten miles long, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he broke his leg doing something completely wrong-town like stealing people’s washing and—’

  ‘Calm down, Sunny,’ Mum said. ‘Settimio has every right to be out in his own garden, and I doubt very much his intention was to sneak up on you, darling.’

  ‘Yeah, well, I don’t want wood-collecting to be my job anymore.’

  ‘I’ll put the kettle on,’ said Carl. ‘Maybe you’d like a chamomile tea?’

  ‘No thanks, Carl,’ I said. ‘It’s my first night in my new room. I kind of want to make the most of it.’

  7.

  I couldn’t possibly list all the good words that described my first night up in the turret. Apart from the word victory of course.

  The only problem (besides the possibility of a bat through the window – ha ha, as if) was that because of the all-around, curtainless windows I was early-bird awake at the first light of day. I lay there and looked at all the parts of my official new bedroom, which didn’t take too long on account of it being a rather small room. The ceiling was all panelled and slanty with white painted boards and there were shelves built right around the doorway, where I’d already unpacked my books and ornaments. On my bedside table I had two lamps: my old lighthouse lamp that Dad gave me for my second birthday and my hippie lava-lamp that Auntie Guff gave me when I turned ten. The lava-lamp was impossible to read by, but perfect for creating atmosphere. When it was on, the whole room glowed dusky pink and I felt like I was inside a genie bottle.

  Outside, the sky was white with fog and clouds, but I was all snuggled up in my new double bed, like a bird in a nest. That’s when I had the idea to spy on Settimio with Granny Carmelene’s telescope. I mean, what else was there to do at that hour? I leapt out of bed, pulled off the lens cap and swung the telescope towards Settimio’s cottage and twisted the focus to home in on the window that faced the turret. Would you believe I could see straight into Settimio’s kitchen? I could see him making coffee and reading the paper. I could even see what paper he was reading. It was all written in Italian.

  Suddenly I felt a bit guilty, which should have been a signal for me to stop, but with Settimio being a confirmed dog-hater and all, I kind of felt entitled. Just then, Settimio stood up from the kitchen table in his huge old-man underpants. And I mean huge. It was enough to put me off spying forever. At least until after breakfast.

  Mum was already up. ‘Here she is,’ she said, as I walked into the kitchen. ‘How did you sleep in your new big bed? Were you warm enough up there?’ She gave me a kiss on the side of the head.

  ‘Warm as toast, thanks, Mum,’ I said, looking about for Willow. She wasn’t keeping warm by the heater panel. ‘Where’s Willow?’ I asked.

  ‘Oh, I haven’t seen her this morning,’ said Mum. ‘I presumed she’d snuck upstairs with you.’

  I ran and opened th
e back door. ‘Willow!’ I called. ‘Willow!’

  It was freezing outside. There was no way she’d be out there for long by herself. Maybe she was curled up with Lyall or Saskia? I went to the bottom of the stairs and called out, but she didn’t come.

  ‘I wouldn’t worry about it too much, Sunny.’ Mum said. ‘She’ll show up. She’s probably just off exploring. You know what she’s like when she’s chasing a scent. Deaf as a mute. At any rate, you better have some breakfast and get a move on or you’ll miss the bus.

  Mum spooned some hot porridge into a bowl and put it on the table in front of me, and I poured on way too much honey and quickly mixed it in while she had her back turned making the lunches. I could hear Lyall and Saskia thumping about upstairs.

  ‘Come on, you two!’ Carl called up the stairs. ‘If you want a lift to school we have to get moving! Oh, morning, Sunny,’ he said, looking about for the coffee Mum had poured him.

  ‘Morning, Carl. Have you seen Willow anywhere?’

  ‘Not since last night, now you come to mention it,’ said Carl

  ‘Mum, can you text me when Willow turns up. Otherwise I’ll be worried all day.’

  ‘Sure, sweetheart. I’ll be here trying to get my workspace set up. I’ve got clients this afternoon and the place is still so disorganised.’

  Living so far from school all of a sudden sure meant having longer wintry mornings. I was standing at the bus stop in my brand new red fingerless gloves, puffing out dragon breath and thinking how if we were still living in Elwood, I could lie in bed until a quarter to nine and still get to school on time. Luckily, it was only going to be until the end of the year that I would have to take the bus, and soon it would be holidays anyway.

  I pulled my favourite old stripy socks as far as possible over my sticky-outy knees. The rest of my legs were goose-bumpy blotches of pink, blue and red. I wouldn’t blame you if you’re wondering why I didn’t wear long pants (or woolly tights at least) instead of a short denim skirt and a hoodie. It’s a wonder Mum let me out the door at all. I guess she knew that insisting I wear something warmer and actually finding something warmer were two very different things. We were still rummaging through boxes to find everything from the remote control to a pair of jeans.