Some Like It Witchy: A Wishcraft Mystery

by Heather Blake

  Ve said, “She stole my signs!”

  Gasping, I looked around again, this time noticing the very empty lawn. Every single political sign was missing. And the big banner that had been tacked to the porch was gone, too.

  “Oooh,” Ve said, seething as she headed for the back door. “I’m calling the police.”

  Starla said, “Do you need me to stick around?”

  “No, that’s okay. Thanks.”

  “Let me know how it goes,” she said, then turned and jogged off, her ponytail flying.

  Looking back at the now-dispersing crowd, I noticed Glinda still standing there. She started toward me, then stopped. Forward, stop. Forward, stop. At this rate, she’d make it across the street by lunchtime.

  I could only imagine what she wanted to say. Maybe more about Andreus’s innocence—or if she’d overheard Ve accuse Dorothy, maybe something about her mother. Though I doubted it would be a defense of her. Glinda knew exactly what Dorothy was capable of and had never condoned any of it. Surprising, really.

  Most likely, Glinda wanted to talk about Mimi, but I had nothing to say to her about that matter. Nick had made it clear. No Glinda.

  Finally, she turned and walked away.

  I let out a relieved breath as Archie came swooping downward, landing on the fence separating our yard from Terry’s. As I opened the gate, he cleared his throat.

  “‘Hell of a woman. Good little thief.’”

  “No idea what that’s from, but it’s rather perfect.”

  He fluffed his feathers. “It is, isn’t it? Reservoir Dogs.”

  I glanced toward the house. High-pitched strains of Ve’s voice carried out as she spoke on the phone inside the house. “Have you ever seen her so angry?”

  Bending, I rubbed Missy’s ears as she let out a big yawn. It had been a long night for her, too.

  Archie said, “Not since Godfrey put the fake snake in her bed.”

  Smiling, I said, “What? When was that?”

  “Shortly before they divorced.”

  I laughed. “Ah, Godfrey. He was really testing the Do No Harm part of our heritage.”

  “If Ve had possession of Circe’s wand at that moment,” Archie mused, “Godfrey would probably be oinking around the village right now.” He lowered his voice. “I daresay, if Ve finds those missing diamonds that Dorothy tread carefully lest she become Miss Piggy.”

  I kept my back to the village green so as not to arouse suspicion from anyone passing by as I chatted with Archie. “What happens if the diamonds are found? Where do they go? Back to the museum?”

  “It depends who finds them,” he said. “If their true value is known I cannot foresee the gems being turned in to the authorities.”

  Their true value. The power.

  “If a Crafter finds them, then he or she should immediately turn them in to the Elder,” Archie continued. “She is the best guardian of them and their magic.”

  It was unsettling to consider the diamonds being used by someone of immoral character. “Did you learn anything yesterday on your eavesdropping missions?”

  “Kent Gallagher is a troll.”

  “Literally?” I asked. One never knew in this village.

  Archie laughed, a deep resonant sound that vibrated his whole being. “Sadly, no. He is merely . . . a cretin. He was joyfully dancing around his office yesterday after learning of Raina’s untimely passing.”

  Talk about immoral character. “I’m not surprised. From what I’ve learned, he checked out of that marriage a while ago. Did you happen to see a woman? He’s allegedly having an affair.”

  “I saw no one; however, I heard him on the phone sweet-talking someone. Lots of babys and sweethearts. I almost hoiked up my breakfast.”

  “Hoiked?” I asked, smiling. “Have you been playing Scrabble with Mrs. P?”

  He hung his head in faux shame. “Yes.”

  It was moments like these that reminded me why I loved this village so much. I said my good-byes and had turned to go into the house when I caught sight of Calliope hurrying across the green, her gaze set on the Tavistock house, a SOLD sign in her hand.

  I hotfooted it to meet up with her. Leaning on the fence, and holding on to the same finial Cherise had latched onto yesterday, I watched as Calliope slapped the magnetic SOLD sign right over Kent’s and Raina’s faces on the FOR SALE sign in the yard.

  “Darcy, hi!” she said, her voice light though she looked like she hadn’t had much sleep either. Darkness circled her eyes.

  “So, it sold,” I said, suddenly feeling very sad.

  “All-cash offer from a client of Noelle’s, no contingencies, no inspection, closing tomorrow. A dream come true for an agent.”

  “Tomorrow?” I asked. “Isn’t that quick? And on a Saturday?”

  “I’ve seen quicker. Cash is king, Darcy, and dictates the rules. Saturday closings aren’t unusual. The official record will be filed on Monday, but the new owner can have access as early as tomorrow afternoon.”

  I tried not to wince as I said, “Was it Andreus who bought it?”

  She shook her head, her hair falling in soft waves around her face. “No. Some sort of trust company.”

  Trust company? “What are they going to do with it?”

  “Ordinarily, I’d say rehab it and sell it for a bigger profit.”

  A spark of foolish hope ignited in me once again. Maybe I could save up . . .

  Then I laughed at myself. I’d have to save a lifetime to buy this place. Maybe two lifetimes.

  “But in this case, I wouldn’t be surprised if it’s a treasure hunter’s company with plans to take the place apart board by board looking for those diamonds.” She shook her head and glanced at the house. “But if a treasure hunter wants to pay a small fortune to look for them, my fat commission and I aren’t going to stop them. Finn and I have student loans to pay off, and this sale goes a long way to erasing that debt.”

  Very pragmatic of her.

  I wondered if Noelle had more than one client offering on the house, because yesterday she’d said that her client with a cash offer hadn’t been interested in the diamonds. . . .

  “I know Cherise will be disappointed with the outcome of this sale,” Calliope said, “but if she’s interested, I’d be happy to show her the Maypole Lane house again—or any others she might be looking at. Just tell her to call me.”

  “I’ll tell her.” Yesterday, Calliope called this job a bird in hand, but today there was a fire in her eyes that told me otherwise. “Do you think you’ll stay in real estate?”

  Fidgeting, she said, “I’m not sure. I can see why it’s so addicting. Kent’s made it clear that he’d like me to stay on.” Glancing at her watch, she added, “Actually, I’m supposed to be meeting him soon to discuss a proposal.”

  Hmm. I wondered if Calliope was the recipient of all those babys and sweethearts Archie overheard. It should be pretty easy for Nick to get a copy of his phone records to find out for sure. Although I’d had her cell phone at the time, she still had a landline. . . .

  I said, “Kent mentioned that you were planning Raina’s funeral. Any details yet? I’d like to attend. . . .”

  “Not yet,” she said softly. “We haven’t heard when she will be released from the medical examiner’s office.”

  It was a blunt reminder that Raina hadn’t died a natural death. “Right,” I murmured. “Well, let me know.”

  “I will. I’ll see you later,” she said, waving as she set off toward the Magickal Realty office.

  As I watched her go, I thought of my phone call with Harper yesterday and the possible motives she’d ticked off for Calliope murdering Raina.

  An affair with Kent.

  Wanting Raina’s job.

  Mentally unstable.

  At this point, it was looking like she’d been right
about two out of three, and that third was still up in the air.

  I hoped I could choke down all the crow I was going to have to eat.

  Chapter Seventeen

  “You wouldn’t do well in prison,” Cherise was saying to Ve as I stood at the top of the stairs, eavesdropping.

  “And I’d hate to have to arrest you,” Nick said. “I don’t think Darcy would forgive me.”

  “It could be cool, though,” Harper said. “A look at the big house from the inside.”

  There was a stretch of silence, and I imagined them all staring at her.

  “Orange is not your color, Velma,” Godfrey finally said.

  “Fine, fine!” Ve said begrudgingly. “I won’t kill her.”

  Fresh from a shower, I rubbed my wet hair with a towel as I listened to the conversation in the kitchen.

  Family.

  Tilda glanced up at me and flicked an ear. I bent and scratched her chin, and she pressed her face against my hand and purred the barest of purrs.

  She had her moments.

  “Can I just hurt her a little?” Ve asked timidly. “A slap? Maybe two?”

  “Assault,” Nick said simply. “If she presses charges, I’d still have to arrest you.”

  “You’ll still have the issue with the orange, even in the local lockup,” Godfrey said.

  “Yeah,” Harper added, “and the local jail is way less interesting than the state pen.”

  Another stretch of silence.

  Cherise said, “I’ve already placed a rush order for more signs. They’ll be ready by noon. This is but a blip,” she said. “Don’t give Dorothy the satisfaction of knowing she got under your skin.”

  I thought it a little late for that, considering the show Ve put on for the village this morning.

  “I suppose,” Ve grumbled, “that I should be grateful she didn’t try to burn down the house. Again.”

  True. Very true.

  I quickly dressed, blow-dried my hair, and headed downstairs. Godfrey had gone, but Nick and Harper sat at the breakfast bar while Cherise made pancakes and bacon. The combo might be better than a serenity spell for Ve. It was her favorite breakfast.

  “I think we’ve talked Ve off the ledge,” Cherise said, glancing over her shoulder at me.

  Ve poured me a cup of coffee and handed it over. “Do not be fooled. I’m still tottering. If Dorothy knows what’s best, she’ll keep her distance today.” She jabbed her hands like she was boxing.

  I thanked Ve for the coffee and asked Cherise if she needed any help.

  “Got it covered. Have a seat,” she said.

  I kissed Nick’s cheek and sat next to him. “How was Mimi this morning?”

  “Fine,” he said, sipping coffee. “Back to her usual self.”

  For how long? I wondered. Until the next time she ran into Glinda?

  “Ve told me what happened,” Cherise said. “I think time is the best option.”

  Nick lifted his eyebrows at me but didn’t actually voice an “I told you so.”

  Ve set out plates. “I agree.”

  I wished I did.

  “She’s finding her way,” Cherise went on. “Each time she sees Glinda, it will get easier to walk away.”

  “I hope you’re right,” Nick said.

  Cherise laughed. “I’m always right.”

  Harper leaned forward and said to me, “While you were upstairs Nick told us that Andreus was bonded out of jail.”

  “What was his excuse for breaking in?” I asked. “Did he have one?”

  “Said he had a little too much to drink and accidentally went into the wrong house,” Nick said, smirking. “The lock on the back door had been picked.”

  “Did he really think you’d buy that excuse?” Cherise asked.

  “No”—Nick sipped from his mug of coffee—“but he couldn’t exactly say why he’d really been in there, could he?”

  “He’s just going to do it again,” Harper said. “Until he finds those diamonds.”

  He did have a history of breaking into homes looking for gems—he’d done it while looking for the amulet that granted wishes.

  I set my coffee cup down. “Well, he now has serious competition.” I told them all about the conversation I’d had with Calliope and her theory that a treasure hunter had bought the house. I also told them how she’d had a meeting with Kent this morning.

  “What kind of proposal does Kent want to talk to her about?” Harper asked.

  I said, “Calliope made it sound like a business proposal.”

  “Right.” Harper snorted.

  “So that’s that,” Cherise said, wiping her hands on a dish towel. “The house is sold.”

  I felt her pain. “Calliope did mention that she’d be happy to show you the Maypole house again.”

  “We’ll see,” she said dejectedly. “I’d had my heart set on that house.”

  Ve glanced at me and winked. “Don’t dwell, Cherise. Something good will come along soon. Perhaps an even better location.”

  I smiled behind my cup. Like Terry’s house.

  Nick’s phone rang and he excused himself to take it outside. Harper took the opportunity to steal his seat. “Here,” she said, sliding a folder over to me.

  “What’s this?”

  “Consider it an early Christmas gift.”

  The mention of Christmas made me think of the drawing I was working on. Suddenly, butterflies filled my stomach. I hoped she liked it. No. I hope she loved it.

  I opened the folder and gasped. “How did you get these?”

  She beamed. “Dating a Lawcrafter comes in handy sometimes. He’s got this really cool database . . . Bing, bang, boom he faxed them to me.”

  “What is it?” Ve asked, craning her neck.

  “Vital records,” I said, quickly riffling through the pile. Certificates of every kind. “Andreus’s birth certificate. His mother’s. His father’s. Andreus’s marriage certificate, his parents’. Death certificates for Sebastian and Zara.”

  Ve said, “Have mercy! So she has passed on?”

  I glanced at the date. “A few years ago. Sixty-nine years old. Manner of death was natural causes.”

  “So young,” Cherise said, setting pancakes on a plate.

  “I wish I knew if she’d been that tipster,” I said, knowing fully well no one here could actually grant the request. Unfortunately.

  “Who else would it be?” Harper asked. “She seems the likely suspect.”

  “I agree, but I’m struggling with how she would have even known about the heist. She’d been gone from the village for a while at that point.”

  “Perhaps she heard something through Andreus,” Ve said. “It wouldn’t surprise me if he knew what his father had planned.”

  It was an interesting theory. “Did Zara remarry?” I asked Harper as I skimmed the records. “Did you find a marriage certificate for that?”

  “I looked. I didn’t find one.”

  Her death certificate listed an address in Plymouth. Maybe I could go talk to her old neighbors . . .

  And say what? I asked myself. It wasn’t likely they’d know anything about the heist—if Zara had even lived at that address back then.

  A dead end.

  I shivered.

  “Since we know Zara is dead,” I said, “maybe Andreus did inherit her belongings, including the Myrian charm. It’s the only explanation of why Raina had it—he sold it to her.”

  “Or,” Harper theorized, “it was in exchange for something to do with the Tavistock house. Perhaps, she leaked confidential info to him. Like how high the highest bid was . . . If so, that plan was an epic failure.”

  If she’d been eager to have a child, then I wouldn’t put anything past her. And it would explain why Andreus had been careless enough to break into th
e house. He was getting desperate, worried that he wouldn’t be able to buy the house now that his inside source was gone.

  “I hope Raina didn’t pay much for the amulet,” Cherise said.

  “Why?” Ve asked.

  “Because if she was hoping to have a child with Kent, she was out of luck. He had a vasectomy about six months ago. Snip. Snip. The Myrian is powerful, but it’s not that powerful.”

  I didn’t question how Cherise knew this information. I was just glad she did. “Wouldn’t Raina have known that he’d had surgery?”

  “Not necessarily,” Cherise said. “I’ve known plenty of men who’ve secretly gotten snipped. The most common reason is that the spouse wants more kids, but he doesn’t want the responsibility of more mouths to feed.” She added, “Those relationships don’t usually stand the test of time.”

  No kidding. If he could lie about that kind of thing, then he was bound to lie about other stuff as well. Like a mistress.

  Harper said, “Maybe that’s what Raina was referring to in that fight when she said he’d made a lot of decisions without her.”

  I didn’t think that’s what she’d been talking about. Or else she wouldn’t have still been wearing the Myrian. More likely, it had been all the business decisions he’d been making without her input.

  “Thanks for these records,” I said to Harper, trying to give her a hug.

  She playfully pushed me away. “Stop that! And you’re welcome.”

  “Where does this leave you, Darcy?” Ve asked, leaning against the counter, fork in one hand, her plate in the other. “Who are your suspects in Raina’s death?”

  I took a bite of bacon. “I’ve only ruled out Kent at this point, because he had an alibi. He was showing a house.” Nick had finally confirmed it. “So, there’s still Calliope, Noelle, and of course, Andreus.”

  Ve shook her head. “I don’t think he did it.”

  “Why?” I asked.

  “He’s a lover, not a fighter.”

  “Ew,” Harper and I said at the same time.

  Cherise laughed. “It’s true. Besides, he doesn’t like messiness. If he’d killed her, it wouldn’t have been so bloody. He would have strangled her.”