A Hero's Heart
Page 5
Wade wanted to pull her into his arms and warm her. But he wasn’t sure if she shivered with cold or fright, and the thought of her soft curves against him rejuvenated the passion he’d thought had disappeared.
“Are you sure you don’t want to try this union of ours, like a real marriage?” he asked mockingly.
Rachel gasped, her parasol coming up between them. She put the tip of it in Wade’s chest and gave a slight push. “Don’t even think about it, Mr. Ketchum. No kisses. No touching. Nothing. Am I making myself perfectly clear?”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, Rachel,” Wade said, his voice deep and low.
In the twilight, her eyes smoldered. “I’m not, Mr. Ketchum. We’ll sleep together, but you will not have the privileges of a husband.”
Wade noted the stubborn set of her chin. “We’ll see.”
“If you want to find some saloon girl along the trail to take care of your baser needs, go right ahead. It won’t bother me,” she said her voice indignant.
Wade frowned. “Saloon girls don’t tempt me like you do.”
Rachel shrugged her shoulders. “As long as you understand I’m not taking their place.”
He pushed back his hat. When was the last time a man had courted the preacher’s daughter? Maybe it was time someone showed her what really went on between a man and woman.
Maybe pretending to be married to Rachel wasn’t going to be as easy a job as he’d first suspected. If he made it all the way to Oregon without touching this woman, then he’d have done more than earn his four hundred dollars.
“So when do we start this game?” Wade asked, trying to stop his treacherous thoughts.
“The sooner, the better. I’m sure Becky will be upset I didn’t tell her, and I’ll need to reassure the children,” Rachel replied, her voice shaky. “But more than anything, we’ll need to talk to Mr. Jordan.”
“Are you sure you can lie and play this game all the way to Oregon, Rachel?” Wade asked.
Rachel cast him a sharp stare. “What choice do I have?”
At the edge of camp, they stopped and watched the tranquil scene. Grace sat, her doll at her side, as Toby taught her the intricacies of checkers. Daniel chased moths around the fire, his toddler’s steps awkward and unsure. Becky sat close to the flames, sewing in hand.
The complexity of what he’d agreed to struck Wade. Escorting a load of gold would have been easier than taking on the responsibilities of seeing two women and three children across the mountains safe and sound.
Rachel gazed at the children and sighed. “I swore on Papa’s grave I would get them to Oregon, that I would help his church.” She looked at Wade. Her full lips were tightly drawn. Her chin had a determined set. “God forgive me. But yes, Wade Ketchum, I can pretend to be your wife, if it will get us to Oregon.”
Chapter Five
“You’re what?” Becky screeched, her voice piercing the night air. She laughed, a high contemptuous sound, as the fire flickered shadows across her face. “What kind of trick are you playing, Mr. Ketchum? Rachel would never marry a man like you.”
“It’s true, Becky,” Rachel interrupted.
A quick glance at Wade confirmed her worst fears. Mischief sparkled from his eyes, provoking Becky’s ire. His arm snaked around Rachel’s shoulders, clasping her close to him.
“I know it’s hard to believe, Becky, but after the other night, we decided it was best we marry,” Wade said.
A coyote howled in the distance, and Rachel wanted to echo its sentiments. Who did Wade think he was fooling? Becky would never believe this ridiculous story. Rachel pinched the inside of Wade’s arm in silent warning.
He glanced down at her, his green eyes twinkling with laughter. “She swept me right off my feet.”
Rachel resisted the urge to swipe the mocking smile from his lips and quiet his forked tongue. Couldn’t he see he was only making the situation worse by feeding Becky this yarn? And from the skeptical scowl on her face, Becky wasn’t fooled.
“We were married this afternoon,” Rachel said, her voice tight and controlled.
The cool night air blew across the fire, sending ashes and sparks shooting upward. Rachel stepped away from Wade and pulled her shawl closer to her. She was cold, but she didn’t know if it was from the chill in the air or the frostiness Becky exuded as she realized they were serious.
Her sister shook her head in denial. “Tell me this is a joke.”
Rachel’s conscience twinged with guilt. “It’s no joke.” No matter what, she loved Becky and the children. They deserved the truth. But they also deserved a chance at happiness, and that likelihood lay in Oregon.
“How could you marry this man?” Becky advanced on Rachel until she stood mere inches away, her blue eyes flashing with fury.
“I know what you’re thinking. We should have waited longer. But like Wade said, the thought of leaving Fort Laramie without him was too much.” Rachel paused, her stomach quivering. She hated lying.
Becky laughed. “The man is a heathen, Rachel. He drinks, curses and takes advantage of women. You’re crazy if think you’re going to reform him.”
The idea of changing Wade was so funny, Rachel would have laughed except for the lump that seemed to enclose her throat. “I’m not planning on converting him.”
“Were you so desperate to get married that you accepted the first proposal that came your way?”
“No! But can’t you see we needed a man to help us reach Oregon? I did what I had to do.”
Becky marched on Wade, who had remained quiet during her tirade. “What do you get out of this?” She paused, stared him straight in the eye and poked her finger in his chest. “If you’re looking for money, you’re going to be sorely disappointed. Church mice are rich compared to us.”
Even in the dim light from the campfire, Rachel could see Wade’s face tighten in anger. “I don’t want anything from you. After the way you found us the other morning, I thought you’d be happy I married your sister.”
“That wasn’t love, Mr. Ketchum. Possibly lust, but even that’s unlikely.”
Wade pulled Rachel into the safety of his arms, as if to shield her from Becky’s venomous tongue. The unexpected move left Rachel feeling warm. Why was he protecting her?
“How do you know what I find attractive?” Wade paused. “I think you’re upset that I didn’t take the bait and come sniffing around your skirts.”
Her sisters pale skin turned a rosy shade. Her blue eyes dilated until Rachel thought they would pop out of their sockets.
Becky raised her chin. “I would never have accepted your attentions. Rachel has been blinded to your obvious faults.”
“If Rachel has been blinded by anyone, it’s you. And if you don’t like me, you’re welcome to find your own way to Oregon.”
“Please, Becky.” Rachel said. “I don’t want to leave you behind, but Wade is my husband.”
She looked at Wade, who sent her a secret smile and squeezed her closer. Merciful heavens, what had she gotten herself into? Those two little words, “honor” and “obey,” were woven into the marriage vows, and even though they weren’t legally binding, she would have to obey him or at least give the appearance of obedience. As for honoring him, well, that was something that had to be earned.
“Humph!” Becky said. “You’ve made your bed and I really don’t care. But I don’t have to obey anyone’s rules anymore. I’m eighteen, old enough to make my own decisions.”
Becky stalked off to the wagon, her skirts swishing.
Rachel took a deep breath and glanced at Wade. He raised his brows, a questioning frown on his face, yet his embrace gave her a sense of security, of safety. He released Rachel as if he realized he was holding her and strolled toward the fire.
Daniel started to fuss. It was way past his bedtime and he rubbed his chubby hands across his drooping eyes. Rachel picked up the toddler, cradling him in her arms. At eighteen months, he was heavy, and she sank down in the rocking chair Be
cky had occupied earlier. The baby laid his head against her shoulder, his soft little body conforming to hers. Rachel kissed the top of his head, gaining strength and comfort from holding him.
When she looked at the children, she realized she would do whatever was necessary to safeguard them.
Grace wandered over to Rachel, a rag doll cradled in her arms, and stood watching her rock Daniel to sleep. “Rachel?” she finally asked her face serious, concerned.
“What is it, Sunshine?”
Grace glanced at Rachel, her big brown eyes full of worry. “Will you send me and Toby away now that you’re married?”
The child’s words pierced her heart. Rachel shifted Daniel over to one hip and made room for Grace. She reached down and lifted the child onto her lap. Daniel fussed at the intrusion.
“No, Grace. You, Toby and little Daniel are my family. I would never let anyone split us up,”
Toby’s voice cracked the evidence of his rapidly changing hormones. “Mr. Ketchum, I’m glad you married Rachel. I don’t care what Becky says.”
Wade glanced at Rachel, his eyes warm and soft, laughter in his voice. “Thanks Toby.”
Rachel couldn’t take the strain any longer. She stood up. “It’s time for bed.”
The longer this night went on the harder it was going to find it to crawl into the tent with Wade. Becky had put it bluntly. She’d made her bed, now she must lie in it. “Put the checkers up, Toby. Grace, gather your dolls.”
A round of moans from Grace and Toby followed her announcement. Daniel was fast asleep in her arms as she carried the toddler to the tent and gently laid him down. Whatever happened, she had to remember the children. They were her biggest reason for taking part in this farce.
Inside the tent was filled with shadows from the campfire. She smiled in secret triumph. Their wedding night! How would Wade respond when she told him they would be sleeping in the tent—with the children?
The fact that she knew Becky would never relinquish the wagon had led her to believe she’d still be chaste when they reached Oregon. She and Wade would spend the entire trip sleeping in the tent, beside Toby, Grace and Daniel.
But what would it be like with Wade resting by her side?
The children were gathered around Wade, watching as he made hand puppets in the shadow of the fire. Yet another sign of the man’s contradiction. How could a man who disliked children be so good with them?
“Where is Mr. Ketchum going to sleep?” Grace blurted out the question Rachel had wanted to avoid voicing as long as possible.
Rachel couldn’t contain the self-satisfied smile that overtook her lips. For once, she knew she had the upper hand, and while she tried not to overreact, the advantage felt good. “He’s going to sleep in the tent with me and you, Grace.”
Wade frowned, his brows furrowing with disapproval. “It’s our wedding night, Rachel.”
“You know Becky sleeps in the wagon, and the children and I take the tent,” Rachel innocently replied.
“That was before,” Wade calmly announced. He strode away, his determined steps carrying him to the wagon. “Becky, pack your things. You’re moving out to the tent.”
The tightly closed canvas curtain of the wagon suddenly snapped open. Becky stuck her head out. “Absolutely not! I will not sleep with those brats. You and your bride can sleep in the tent.”
Becky yanked the canvas closed. Wade jerked it open. “Let’s get this straight. You’ll sleep in the tent with the children until we reach Oregon. Or you can sleep by the fire. I don’t care which you choose.”
Becky’s mouth dropped open in surprise. She glanced at Rachel. “You’ve made a colossal mistake, big sister. And I hope I’m around when you realize it.”
She marched off to the tent, her shoulders straight, her nightgown flapping in the breeze. The image she presented reminded Rachel of a fat hen strutting across the barnyard, squawks coming from her beak, her feathers all ruffled.
Toby led Grace to the tent, following behind the queen hen at a safe distance.
“Well, Mrs. Ketchum, we’re alone.” Wade said as he sat down on a stool by the fire, his voice as chilly as the night air.
Rachel sighed. “I’m sorry Becky took the news so badly. I had hoped she’d be more accepting, since I am twenty-two years old and considered and old maid by most people.”
Wade laughed, his voice deep and resounding. “You make twenty-two sound like a hundred. A beautiful woman like yourself, I’ll bet you could have been married many times before now.”
“Me, beautiful? I think you’ve been out in the sun too long.”
“No! You’ve listened to that nag of a sister of yours for too long. You’re better looking than she is, Rachel.”
Rachel raised her hand to her chest. Her heart pounded so loudly, she was certain Wade could hear it. Was he serious or was he trying to sweet-talk his way into her arms?
“I suggest you go prepare our bed, Mrs. Ketchum,” Wade announced, his eyes twinkling with merriment in the flickering shadows of the fire.
Rachel felt as if the earth was starting to tremble beneath her. She had depended on sleeping with the children. Could she resist the man and his charm for the next three months while sleeping in his bed?
“What are you waiting for, Rachel?” Wade asked. “I thought women liked a few minutes alone while they prepared themselves for their husband?”
“You’re not my husband,” she hissed.
Rachel turned and stalked off, her feet quickly carrying her to the wagon, his mocking laughter in her ears. She scrambled inside the small, dark space and waited for the trembling to subside. Somehow she had to get through this.
She glanced around the inside of the wagon. There was barely enough room for one person, let alone two people. The boxes of Bibles, the organ and their supplies took up most of the space. They would be sandwiched together tighter than meat and bread, unless she found a way…
Scrambling out of the wagon, her long skirts almost tripped her. Wade was busy extinguishing the fire. She looked underneath the bed of the wagon to where her father carried the spare boards for repair. Pulling a wooden plank free, she dusted it off and put inside the wagon.
Crawling back in, she lit the lantern and quickly made up their bed. With the sheets, blankets and pillows all neatly arranged into two separate sleeping areas, she placed the board between them, lodging it between two boxes.
With a swish Wade opened the canvas covering and crawled into the wagon, his head bent his hat brushing the top.
“What’s this?” Wade asked, pointing to the board that lay between their pallets.
“I believe it is referred to as a bundling board,” Rachel informed him.
Wade laughed, his voice ringing in the close confines of the wagon. Rachel felt claustrophobic, engulfed by him, by his presence. He had consumed what little space was left inside the tight wagon. There was no place to move, no place to escape. Even the air she breathed held Wade’s scent, overwhelming her with his intensity.
“Did you want me to help you undress?” Wade asked, his eyes twinkling with mischief, his voice silky smooth.
“Absolutely not,” Rachel replied horrified. “I’m sleeping in my clothes.”
“You’re going to sleep in the same clothes the rest of the trip?”
“No. But neither am I going to sleep in my night rail,” Rachel said with definite purpose as she climbed under the bedcovers on her half of the pallet.
Wade shrugged. “Suit yourself.”
He pulled his shirttails out of his pants and started to undo the buttons lining the front.
“Mr. Ketchum! The light, please,” Rachel demanded.
Wade smiled and continued unbuttoning his shirt until the garment lay completely open. A light smattering of hair grew across his muscled chest, in a vee that disappeared beneath his pants. Slowly, he shrugged the shirt off his bronzed back and down the hard ridges of his arms.
Paralyzed, she watched him undress, staring at the
hard expanse of his chest. She observed the rippling effect of his muscles as he laid the shirt on a box close by. Sitting down, he proceeded to tug at his boots, until they slid from his stocking feet. She took a deep breath, trying to still her racing heart, knowing she should roll over.
But she couldn’t look away.
When he reached for his pants, she gazed up into his eyes and noticed the laughter emanating from their depths. She burned from the tips of her toes all the way to her cheeks and quickly rolled over, facing the inside of the wagon. The audacity of the man! The least he could do was turn the lamp off.
Wade chuckled and extinguished the flame. The wagon was suddenly enshrouded in darkness. But the darkness only heightened the sounds, as Rachel heard the jingle of his belt and the rustle of his pants when he slid them from his body. She felt the creak of the wagon as he lay down beside her.
“Mrs. Ketchum, if you think that board, all those clothes, and your virginity are going to keep me away from you, you’re mistaken. If I had a mind to bed you tonight, nothing would stop me.” Wade paused, his words lingering in the air. “You’re starting to become a challenge, Rachel. And I love a good challenge.”
Rachel lay as still as a church mouse, her heart pounding in her ears.
“Why, Mr. Ketchum? So that in three months you could leave me in Oregon with a baby in my belly? So that I could become just another one of your women?” Rachel sighed in the darkness. “No, thank you. I want a man who will stand by my side, who will love me and the children through the good times and the bad. I don’t think that’s what you want.”
“Go to sleep, Rachel. You’re safe tonight. But I won’t promise not to try to seduce you somewhere along the trail. I’m no saint, just a man. A man who thinks you’re a hell of a tempting woman.”
Chapter Six
Bleary-eyed from lack of sleep, Rachel stared absently at the dirty diapers swirling in the tub of hot water. Wade’s handsome face swam before her eyes, his voice reverberated through her head.
She had awakened this morning to an empty pallet. Where he had gone, she had no idea, though a pesky voice whispered that last night’s promises to deliver them to Oregon were all a sham.