Nobody_Does_It_Better_Kobo

by Lexi Blake

  I lay there, my focus on breathing and continuing to do it even though each breath was not only an effort but an agony. The fear I’d felt early when he took me, how he’d taken me, the way he’d handled me and I knew he’d figured it out, had dissipated as pain took its place. Now, the fear was returning that they’d come back and dish out more.

  He’d come back.

  Throttle.

  No, to me he was Beck. My boyfriend. Gerard Beck. He hated the first name Gerard so everyone called him Beck. All his life. Or since he could demand that happen and not allow anything but that. Even his mother called him Beck.

  Until he got his club name, Throttle. All his brothers called him that. When I was with him when he was with his brothers, I also called him that.

  But when we were alone, at home, he was Beck.

  My Beck.

  My man. My lover. My protector. My future.

  The man who’d just spit on me and kicked me.

  But he’d done more before that.

  He’d grabbed me from work and delivered me right to them, right to where I was right then. Even starting it, choking me until I thought I’d blank out, then clocking me in the temple, then on the jaw, then on my cheekbone.

  Throttle.

  That name was given to him for a reason but not the reason he’d now become Throttle to me.

  I shut my eyes tight, opened them, reached to the phone he’d tossed at me and endured the immense pain that scoured through me, leaving me feeling even more raw, which if my brain had room to process anything further, I would have thought unimaginable.

  My fingers closed around the phone and I huffed out little breaths, which were hard to take since each one sent fire through my midsection. So I tried deep breaths, and those were worse because the fire lasted even longer.

  Dread intermingled with all the rest as I tried to focus on moving my thumb to open the phone, but I saw the black creeping in at the sides of my eyes.

  I couldn’t pass out.

  I had to call for help.

  I had to get out of there.

  My body had different ideas, sending the message to my brain that this was too much, it couldn’t take more.

  So I passed out.

  * * * * *

  I came to woozy and disoriented.

  The pain, the stench of the room, the feel of the cement beneath me brought it all slamming back, along with the panic.

  Having no idea how long I was out, feeling the phone resting in my hand, I actually grunted with the effort of sliding it up, wrapping my fingers around it, using my thumb to flip it open.

  An old-style flip phone.

  A burner.

  We’d joked about it, Snap and me. He’d called me Scully. He had a burner too, so there’d be no caller ID when he phoned me. So I’d called him Mulder.

  I was going to call him.

  Not because I was working for Chaos anymore. I wasn’t. That officially ended on that cement. Definitely not because I was protecting Bounty. I’d tell the police. Absolutely, I’d tell the police my boyfriend’s motorcycle club beat the snot out of me. It didn’t matter that I broke the code, and knew it. It didn’t matter that I’d betrayed my man, and done it deliberately.

  I was trying to save him. Save his brothers. Save his club. Save everyone.

  I closed my eyes tight, my thumb moving over the phone from memory, knowing the way on its own, I called him so often. That was why I was calling him now rather than 911. I knew how to get to him. To Snapper. And the effort would be less. I could dial the digits to get him up on speed dial in my sleep, so I could do it lying on a cement floor, beat to hell and practically unable to move.

  I couldn’t lift the phone to my ear so I just shoved it across the floor closer to my face, listening to it ring.

  “Rosie?” Snap answered.

  I closed my eyes tighter as understanding hit me with a blow almost as brutal as every strike I’d just taken.

  God.

  I hadn’t done it to save Beck. To save his brothers, his club…everybody.

  At first, I’d done it to make Beck into Shy.

  And then I’d done it to make him be Snapper.

  And last, I’d done it to make his club Chaos.

  “Rosie?” Snap’s Eddie Vedder baritone got sharper.

  Oh no.

  No.

  The black was creeping in again.

  “Sss…” was all I could get out.

  “Rosalie,” he bit out, curt, alert, alarmed.

  “Hurt,” I whispered.

  And then, again, I blacked out.

  Justice for Milena

  Badge of Honor, Texas Heroes Book 10

  By Susan Stoker

  Coming March 13, 2018

  Click here to pre-order

  It’s been years since Milena Reinhardt has seen TJ “Rock” Rockwell. The last time, he was nearly a shell of a man…but he was her man…and he tore her heart out of her chest. Circumstances unbeknownst to TJ have ensured Milena’s never fully recovered.

  TJ left his sniper days behind—for the most part—when he left the Army and become a respected Texas Highway Patrolman. He also left behind Milena. He’s convinced it was the right thing to do at the time, but that doesn’t mean he’s ever forgotten the woman who loved him in his greatest time of need…or has stopped thinking of her since.

  Neither thought they’d see each other again, until a pedophile’s operation is taken down and the evil man sets his vengeful sights on Milena. This could be their second chance, even though TJ and Milena have enough secrets and trust issues to end any relationship before it starts. But when the bad guy closes in, they’ll have to set aside their fears and trust in each other, to save the one thing that means the world to them both.

  ** Justice for Milena is the 10th book in the Badge of Honor: Texas Heroes Series. Each book is a stand-alone, with no cliffhanger endings.

  * * * *

  Sadie sat cross-legged on Milena’s bed later that night. The room was lit only by a lamp on the bedside table.

  “He flat-out said he loves you?” Sadie asked, her eyebrows drawn down in disbelief.

  “Yeah. Just threw it out there like I was supposed to fall at his feet or something,” Milena said caustically. She knew she was being unfair, but she felt off kilter.

  The years had been good to him. When they’d been together three years ago, he was still healing from the wounds he’d gotten overseas. But since then, he’d healed completely and had filled out. His arms were thick and muscular, and she had a feeling if she ever saw him without a shirt, she’d see that he was even more chiseled than he’d been in the past. His brown hair was shorter than when they’d been together before, and he seemed to have a perpetual five o’clock shadow now, which was sexy as all get out.

  But it wasn’t just his looks that were slightly different. He seemed even more intense than he’d been back then…if that was possible. His brown eyes were penetrating. Whereas before, he frequently looked away from her when he was talking, as if he felt guilty about something, now he had no problem holding eye contact. All that attention on her made Milena feel as if whatever she was saying was the most important thing he’d ever heard. It was a little discomfiting, but also made her feel all squishy inside.

  “And did you?” Sadie asked.

  “Did I what?” Milena repeated, not sure what they were talking about as she’d gotten lost in memories of TJ.

  “Fall at his feet?”

  “Of course not!” Milena said quickly—maybe a bit too quickly.

  “But you want to.” It wasn’t a question.

  “No, I don’t.” The look of skepticism was easy to read on Sadie’s face. “Look, he’s just here because he feels guilty or something. And he might be assigned to look after me until Jeremiah and Jonathan are found.”

  Sadie shook her head. “I’m sure he does feel some guilt, and he should. He was a dick. But, Milena, he doesn’t have to protect you. The Feds can assign someone else to you.
There are thousands of law enforcement officers in this city. Any one of them can protect you.”

  Milena blocked out the common sense her friend was using. “He’s arrogant to the nth degree. He strode into the house and practically told me I was his…like a caveman or something. He thinks that throwing money at me and putting me on his insurance will fix everything.”

  Sadie shifted until she was lying on her side and her head was propped up by a hand. She was about as different from Milena as she could get. Her dark auburn hair fell messily around her shoulders and her green eyes were piercing in their intensity. She was almost five inches taller than Milena, and slender in a way Milena would never be.

  “Let me tell you something about dominant men…once they decide they want something, they’re gonna get it one way or another.”

  Milena shook her head. “That’s not how things work.”

  “It is,” Sadie insisted. “Let me guess, he told you he left for your own good, right?”

  “Yeah, pretty much.”

  “Men like TJ have crazy high standards for themselves. It’s ridiculous, really. They think they have to be perfect. I’m guessing he was really good at what he did in the Army…” Sadie’s voice trailed off, as if she was asking a question without coming out and actually voicing it.

  Milena nodded. “Yeah, I got that impression. He was a sniper.”

  “Oh Christ,” Sadie murmured, and turned to flop onto her back. “Yeah, so he was probably very good at his job. He got hurt and was sent home…to him, I’m sure that felt like a massive failure. He was frustrated he wasn’t over there still fighting, and then he was chaptered out of the service altogether. When he had healed enough, he lived with you, right?”

  “He didn’t have anywhere else to go,” Milena told her friend defensively.

  “Don’t you get it?” Sadie asked. “There he was, still healing, no home, no job, he probably felt like he’d let his friends and country down. He was lost. I’m frankly surprised he stayed as long as he did.”

  Milena couldn’t help but flinch. That hurt.

  “Oh sweetie,” Sadie said, and leaned over and put her hand on Milena’s knee. “I didn’t mean that in a bad way. What I meant was that he had to have loved you to have stayed for as long as he did. He left because he didn’t feel like he was man enough for you. He was trying to be noble. Men like him don’t like to feel vulnerable. At all.”

  “I didn’t judge him, Sadie. Not for one second. I would’ve been there by his side as he worked through whatever he had to, but he didn’t give me the chance.”

  Sadie turned back over and stared at the ceiling once more. “You have to be sneaky with men like him,” she informed her friend. “They need your support, but you have to do it in such a way that they don’t really realize what you’re doing. He’s got a group of close friends, right?”

  “I have no idea.”

  “He does,” Sadie said with conviction. “His tribe. And I’ll bet those friends have women of their own. You need to get to know them. Get close to them. They’ll be your source of support when it comes to your man because TJ isn’t going to come home and tell you when he’s had a bad day. You’ll be able to sense it, but he won’t tell you why. And that’s okay, but you can talk to the other women to help yourself deal with how he is. You can set up guys’ nights out. Let him blow off some steam. Cook him dinner. Initiate sex. Let him take you how he wants and needs. That’s how you help a man like TJ.”

  “How do you know all this? You’re single!”

  Sadie smiled up at the ceiling. “I’m a good observer. My aunt married a man just like TJ. Well, maybe not just like him, but close enough. You know I was the administrative assistant for McKay-Taggart. Everyone who works there is just like your man. Alpha, obsessive, insanely jealous, and when they fall for someone, they fall hard. And it might look like the men are in charge, but ultimately, it’s the women who hold most of the power. I’ve seen my uncle leave in the middle of an important meeting because my aunt called and needed something. He’s big, and sometimes scary, but my aunt and his kids mean the world to him.”

  Milena sighed. She wanted to believe her friend, but it was so hard. “He let me down, Sadie. Big time. I don’t know that I’ll ever be able to trust him again.”

  “You will,” Sadie said with conviction.