by Leslie Gould
Charlie yawned and started the coffee. He’d stayed up too late. The night had been so bright and clear he’d walked longer than he’d meant to, trying to clear his head. Talking with Eve on the phone was one thing but being so close to her, just down the lane, was another. He wanted nothing more than to see her in person. A part of him had hoped she’d sneak out last night and try to find him. He didn’t feel good about the wish—but it was there.
He wasn’t sure what had happened in the last week, but something had. They’d talked about everything over the phone. Their childhoods. Her Rumschpringe. Her Englisch boyfriend, Patrick. Abra.
“She wasn’t wild, not like I was. I’m the one who should have been punished.”
But then she’d said, “Not that I see the twins as a punishment now. God’s the one who chose to bless the world with Lila and Daniel. There’d be no giving them back.”
Charlie agreed. That was the way God worked.
He’d told her a little about what had happened in Iraq—that Samuel had been killed and that Joel nearly had been.
He poured himself a cup of coffee and headed out the back door with it. The sheep were already turned out into the field, but the chickens were squawking as if they hadn’t been fed. Charlie stepped to the edge and peered down the field. The grass glistened from the frost. In the morning light it appeared as if diamonds had fallen during the night.
Zane, Daniel, and Simon huddled at the end of the field. Then Eve appeared. The boys gathered around her. Tim must have left for the lumberyard already. Charlie started up the field.
Eve had on a faded blue dress, her cape, and a bandana instead of her white Kapp. Simon saw Charlie first and broke into a big smile followed by an enthusiastic wave. The rest turned toward him too. Eve smiled. Even at a distance he could make out her dimples.
Charlie’s heart began to race. The boys started running toward him. Eve followed at a respectable pace.
“Are you done with your chores?” Charlie called out.
Daniel yelled that they were, but Zane said he still needed to feed the chickens and gather the eggs.
“We’re going to help him,” Simon said. It would take all of three minutes.
They passed Charlie and kept on running.
When Eve neared, Charlie feared for a moment that there would be an awkwardness between them. But once they met, she smiled, her dimples deep.
He longed to reach for her hand. “How are you?” he asked.
“Gut.” She stepped closer.
His heart raced. “What do you have planned for today?”
“Housework. Lila’s going to help me scrub the floors. And wash the windows. We have church at our house in two weeks, the Sunday after Thanksgiving.”
“Where will you have the service?”
“In the shed, but we won’t start cleaning that out until next weekend.”
“How about the meal?” He hadn’t actually seen how it worked the day he went to Deacon King’s house, but he could imagine how hard it was to feed that many people.
“In the house. We don’t really have enough room—everyone will have to walk sideways.” She smiled again. “I wish Gi—” She paused. “That we’d been given a time in the summer.”
Was the pause to avoid saying Gideon’s name?
Shani’s voice interrupted them. “There you are!” she called out.
Charlie turned. Shani wore sweats and Joel’s jacket. Eve and Charlie started toward her.
“Good morning!” Shani beamed, obviously delighted to see Eve. “I see your boys are helping Zane with his chores, as if he needs it.”
Charlie trailed behind Eve, sorry to see their brief time alone come to an end.
“You’ll never guess who I met last night,” Shani said.
It took Charlie a moment to realize she was talking to him. “Who?”
“Karina Johnson. And Samantha.”
Charlie couldn’t comprehend what she was saying. They lived outside of Philly. “Where?”
“At the hospital. Samantha has pneumonia again. They’d been visiting Samuel’s parents.”
“Wow,” was all Charlie could manage to say.
“She’d like to see you.”
Eve gave Charlie a concerned look. Without thinking, he said, “Samuel’s wife and baby.”
“Oh.” Eve’s eyes filled with compassion.
If Shani thought their exchange odd, she didn’t say anything. “They’ll be at the hospital another day at least. The baby’s oxygen is pretty low. I haven’t told Joel yet.” She turned toward Charlie. “Do you think I should?”
“It would be natural to tell him.”
Shani shrugged. “Then why do I feel so unsettled? Why do I feel as if it’s just going to make him worse?”
“It might make him feel bad,” Charlie said. “But telling him later would make him angry.”
“Not if he doesn’t find out at all.” Shani took a long drink of coffee.
It wasn’t like her to be secretive. That was one of the things that Charlie had always admired about her—her honesty.
“Don’t treat him like one of your patients,” Charlie said. “He’s a lot stronger than he seems.”
She shook her head. “Sure, he’s strong in some ways. But he’s really fragile in others.” She held her chin high.
Charlie softened. “We could tell him together.”
“Thank you,” Shani said. “That’s what we’ll do.” Then she turned toward Eve. “Karina’s in-laws are Mennonite . . . maybe. . . . Something like that. And they just moved to this area.”
Charlie tilted his head.
“Karina seems so young,” Shani said. “She could use a friend like you, Eve.”
Charlie couldn’t disagree with that, but Eve didn’t have time to take care of anyone else.
“Maybe we could go up to see her,” Shani said.
Charlie thought of all the housework Eve needed to do, but she surprised him by saying, “I’d like to meet Karina and her in-laws—I’ll call Monika and see if we could drop the kids off at her house.”
“Why don’t I just stay with the kids,” Charlie said. “Lila will help with Trudy.”
“We can go while she’s napping.” Eve pushed up the sleeves of her dress. “The kids could all be over here.” She nodded toward the Becks’ house.
Charlie thought that was a good idea. Trudy could nap upstairs in the room Shani had set up for her baby.
“Should we go around eleven, then?” Shani asked.
“Jah, that will give me time to do my chores,” Eve said, turning around and heading back up the field.
A few minutes later, while Joel drank his coffee, Shani told him about Samuel’s baby.
He put his head in his hands.
“She’s going to be okay,” Charlie said. “Right, Shani?”
“Yes. She’s getting good care. Karina’s a great mom. She has a lot of support from Samuel’s parents.” She hesitated for a moment and then said, “They were at the hospital last night too.”
Joel looked up. “What did they say?”
“I didn’t realize who they were until after they left.”
“Oh,” he said.
He seemed surprised by the information but not overly upset.
“Do you want to go up to the hospital with Eve and Shani?” Charlie asked. “To see them?”
He shook his head. “You should go though.”
“I’m going to watch the kids,” Charlie said. “Trudy’s going to nap over here.”
“Go,” Joel said. “I can be in charge. I’ll keep the landline in my hands at all times.”
Shani shook her head.
“We know how quick the paramedics can get here,” Joel said. “Trudy will sleep the whole time, right? And Lila will be here. The kids can play board games inside. I promise I won’t watch TV.”
Shani shot a look at Charlie. He shrugged. It was the most responsibility Joel had been willing to take since the attack. They might as well let him ste
p up and be in charge.
Shani insisted on driving her van. “That way Eve can sit up front with me,” she said. Charlie would have liked to sit next to Eve, but he knew it was a foolish wish.
By the time they reached the hospital, the gray clouds had grown dark. “Looks like a storm is on the way,” Eve said.
They found Karina in the baby’s room, her in-laws with them. Shani introduced Eve as a friend and then Charlie as Samuel’s Army buddy. Shani had been right—the in-laws were Mennonite. Not Old Order but fairly conservative.
Charlie listened in as Eve figured out that they went to the same church as Abra’s parents.
“You know Leona and Eli?” the mother-in-law asked.
“Jah,” Eve said. “I’m their grandchildren’s Aenti. I was Abra’s best friend.”
The woman bit her lip and then said, “Leona mentioned their daughter. I know they understand our pain over Samuel.”
Charlie tried to remember what Samuel had said about his parents. Not much. Just that they didn’t want him to join the Army. Now it was clear why.
Samantha was under the oxygen tent—an IV hooked up to her hand and a finger probe to measure her oxygen and monitor her pulse. She’d grown some since the last time he’d seen her, but she was still really small.
“The doctor said she’ll probably be able to go home tomorrow or at least by Monday, but we’ll stay in Lancaster for a while,” Karina said. “At least past Thanksgiving.”
“Where are your folks?” Charlie asked her.
“Colorado,” she answered. “We’ll go out for Christmas, if Samantha is doing all right.”
He remembered now that Samuel had met Karina when he was in college in Indiana.
Eve, Karina, and Shani talked softly while Charlie visited with the in-laws for a while. They’d sold their farm in Illinois and the father-in-law was now working at a nursery. “It’s worth it,” he said, looking at Samantha. “We already had quite a few friends here.” They seemed like good people and Charlie was relieved Karina and Samantha had them in their lives.
He knew Karina had been a dental hygienist before she had the baby. He couldn’t imagine her returning to work now and putting Samantha in daycare, not when she was so ill.
“Does Karina plan to stay in the Philly area?” Charlie asked her in-laws.
The mother-in-law gave her husband a furtive glance. “We’re not sure,” the man answered.
Charlie quickly said, “I didn’t mean to pry.”
“Oh, it’s fine,” the woman responded. “It’s been hard for her to decide.”
Charlie guessed Karina didn’t plan to go back to Colorado—otherwise the Johnsons wouldn’t have relocated.
After a half hour, Shani said they should go. After telling everyone good-bye, as they walked out into the hall, Charlie thanked Eve for accompanying them.
“I’m so glad I did,” Eve answered. “I’ll call Leona tonight so she knows to check in on the Johnsons.”
“Do we have time to get some lunch?” Charlie asked.
Shani glanced at her watch. “I told Zane to make sandwiches —and a smoothie for Simon.” She turned toward Eve. “How long will Trudy nap?”
“For another hour or so.”
“A quick lunch in the cafeteria and . . . Uh-oh.” Shani stopped. “I forgot to check my schedule. You guys go on ahead. I’ll catch up with you.”
There was a bench in the hallway ahead, before the entrance to the cafeteria. “We’ll wait for you here,” Charlie called out as Shani headed back toward the elevator. He turned to Eve. “If that’s all right.”
She smiled. “It’s fine.”
His hand brushed Eve’s arm as they sat. “Sorry,” he said, inching away. He longed to convey how much he’d enjoyed their phone calls, but he couldn’t come up with the right words. Instead he kept quiet.
After an awkward silence, Eve asked, “What happened the night Samuel was killed?”
Her question caught him off guard.
She must have sensed his discomfort. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
“No,” he said. “Are you sure you want to hear it?”
“Positive,” she answered, folding her hands in her lap.
“It was the eleventh of May,” he said. “The day after Samuel’s baby was born. We were headed back to base at dusk after checking on a faulty antenna. Joel had sent the first Humvee, and the gunner, from our unit on ahead because they were done with their work.
“Samuel should have been driving our Humvee, but Joel was at the wheel because Samuel was exhausted and fidgety and wired all at the same time. They both sat up front, and I sat in the back. As sunset fell, it cast a pale pink hue across the horizon, and Joel told Samuel it was in honor of his baby girl. Samuel and his wife were going to decide on a name, via Skype, the next morning.
“Then, just as dusk fell, a rocket-propelled grenade hit the engine, stopping the Humvee and hurling shrapnel through the windshield. I bailed out of the vehicle.”
Charlie paused for a moment, and Eve leaned closer, as if to encourage him.
He continued. “I yanked open Samuel’s door and checked his neck for a pulse. There was none.” Charlie inhaled sharply. “It was obvious by—” He paused again. “There wasn’t anything I could have done to save him.”
He told her how he ran around to Joel’s door, managed to get it open, and put his fingers to Joel’s neck. Relief flooded through him. He had to get Joel out of the Humvee.
He wrapped his arms around Joel’s chest and yanked him out as bullets zoomed by, most hitting the Humvee. Darkness was falling quickly. It was his only hope to get Joel to safety.
He dragged him across the road and behind the closest palm tree. Joel was unconscious, and the shrapnel had torn up his leg. It was bleeding badly. Charlie ripped open Joel’s medical kit and yanked out the tourniquet, putting it on as fast as he could. Then he threw Joel over his shoulder and ran up the bank, taking cover behind another tree, hoping there were no snipers behind them.
A big boom shook the ground. Charlie threw himself on top of Joel and raised his head, holding onto his helmet. A second rocket-propelled grenade hit the Humvee, blowing it apart. Then a third. That’s when the shrapnel hit Charlie’s arm.
He radioed for help and then tried to rouse his friend. Joel slipped in and out of consciousness. Charlie prayed over him, in a whisper. He recited the Lord’s Prayer in German, the way his grandfather had taught him. He tried not to think of Samuel, his wife, or new baby. Or Shani and Zane.
It seemed to take forever until a helicopter landed.
“God bless the medivacs who risk their lives over and over,” Charlie said to Eve. “Because of them, Joel got out in time.”
“I’m so sorry,” she said.
“Thanks,” Charlie said, “but I was the lucky one.”
She touched his arm as she asked, “How bad was your injury?”
“Not bad. I was only in the hospital a few hours. Got it cleaned out and stitched up. I was back in the field in a few days.” Charlie had been looking straight ahead as he told his tale, but he turned toward her now. “You’re the only civilian I’ve told this to,” he said.
“Why?”
His eyes grew moist. “It’s not easy to talk about. I’m not sure most people would understand—I came through it fine. But it’s still the hardest thing I’ve ever gone through.”
“Of course,” Eve said, tightening her grip.
His heart lurched. Sitting next to Eve on the bench felt too close, too intimate. “Let’s wait for Shani in the cafeteria,” he said, standing. They could sit across the table from each other instead of side by side.
Although she had a confused expression on her face, she followed.
Charlie saw Gideon first, coming around the corner. He grabbed Eve’s arm to keep her from crashing into the man, pulling her closer to him, sending a shiver down his spine. She looked back up at him with her beautiful doe eyes for a split second before she realized G
ideon was beside them.
“Oh.” She pulled away from Charlie. “Hallo.”
Gideon’s eyes filled with worry.
“Why are you here?” she asked.
“Deacon King was admitted in the middle of the night with chest pains,” Gideon answered.
Eve’s hand went to the top of her cap. “Is Monika here?”
Gideon shook his head. “She went home to try to get some rest.” Gideon glanced from Eve to Charlie and back to Eve. “What are you doing here?”
“Visiting a young widow and her baby. Her in-laws go to Leona and Eli’s church.” Eve blushed as she spoke.
“And what is your relationship to the young woman?” he asked Charlie, though he was looking at Eve.
Charlie stepped forward. “Her husband was in my unit, in Iraq. Joel was our staff sergeant.”
“Oh.” Gideon’s eyes were still on Eve. “I’m going to put some prayer and thought into this. In the meantime think about your nieces and nephews. About your obligations. Your responsibilities. I’ve given you the benefit of the doubt because—” He shook his head. He didn’t seem angry. Just befuddled.
She took a step backward. Charlie wanted to reach for her hand but stopped himself.
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Gideon said to her. “At church.” He stepped around Eve without saying anything more to Charlie.
Eve leaned against the wall, her head down. Charlie stepped to her side.
They stood silently outside of the cafeteria, Charlie wanting to reach out to her, to talk to her, but he feared Gideon coming back down the hall. Charlie was tempted to remind Eve they weren’t doing anything wrong—that they were just being friendly. But that was a lie. They’d moved on to being friends, close friends. And if it was up to Charlie, they’d be more than that soon.
Instead he whispered, “Eve, is being with Gideon what you really want?”
She met his eyes.
“You left the Amish once.” He spoke as softly as he could. “Are you sure you’re meant to stay?”
“I’ve been a fool,” she said, her voice louder than his.
“What about?” Shani had snuck up on them.
Charlie grimaced. How much had she overheard?