A December to Remember: a Holiday Romance Anthology

by Howe, Olivia

  Holy fuck.

  She really is fucking perfect.

  I remove one leg, and then the other. My hand starts at her ankle with a gentle squeeze. I gently follow the curve of her calf before I plant a chaste kiss inside her knee. My hands are eager and I have to fight for control. I don’t want to rush this.

  I want it to last forever.

  I cup her center and gently rub my thumb across her small nub. She responds by trying to grind against me.

  Something in that move snaps my resolve. My mouth finds her heat with more force than I intend, but she doesn’t cry out to stop. Instead she throws her head back and bows her body, giving my mouth full access to her while she moans my name.

  I almost fucking cum in my boxers.

  Luckily I manage to hold it together, enjoying every whimper and moan Felicity exudes. She tastes like I imagine heaven would.

  I add a finger and feel her inhibitions let go. She tenses around my finger and I know her release grows close. With my tongue I flick her nub, once, twice—and when she’s bends off the bed I feel her contract around my finger. I look up to see the most beautiful sight—Felicity undone.

  And it’s my undoing.

  I rip off my underwear and put on a condom in record time. With another kiss I position myself between her legs. Before I can even ask, Felicity wraps her legs around me, causing me to fill her.

  Our groans are matching this time.

  She uses her legs as leverage and grinds against me in a circle.

  Fuck.

  I slowly pull out almost fully and then back in. I do this again and again. Then I begin to pick up the pace. Felicity matches every thrust until we’re a tangle of sweat-covered bodies with one common goal.

  I feel her tighten around me and I know she’s close again. I’m barely hanging by a thread so I reach down and flick her nub again. When she crashes she takes me with her.

  It takes a moment before I can move…or see…or breathe properly. I make quick work of disposing of the condom (once I’m able) before I pull her close and kiss her gently.

  She doesn’t say anything, but holds me a bit tighter as we drift off to sleep.

  Chapter Seven

  "The word 'happiness' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness."

  ~Carl Jung

  Felicity

  I found an even better way to wake up…

  Way better.

  New best way ever.

  Ever.

  We drag it out until Trent has to go get ready for work. I retreat to the shower and handle my business. When I come out and dress, I go in search of sustenance.

  I find the person I least want to see in the kitchen. A glance to the driveway confirms that Becca and Will must be out. Fucking great.

  “Good morning, Felicity.” Eric says in a surprisingly cheerful tone.

  “Good morning,” I answer politely, but cautiously.

  “I trust you slept well.” There’s a strange feeling in the room.

  “Yes, thanks.” I try not to overthink anything because I tend to do that…a lot.

  The room remains silent while I pour coffee and take a sip. It’s not until I put the mug down that Eric begins to speak again.

  “You know, Will told me about your parents. I think it’s horrible and I’m very sorry for your loss.”

  Again his kind words feel tainted somehow. “Thanks.”

  “I think it’s incredible of you to be with Trent in spite of it all.”

  My mug freezes mid-lift. “I’m sorry, what?”

  Eric leans forward slightly. “You know—his family. He has told you, hasn’t he?”

  I shake my head slowly, knowing full well whatever comes next is going to hurt like hell.

  Eric’s face grows somber. I see through his act, but don’t currently care.

  I have to know.

  I have to know now.

  “Trent’s family,” Eric tells me, “Is affiliated with the same gang that killed your parents, Felicity. Just ask him if you don’t believe me.”

  I don’t say anything.

  I can’t say anything.

  The betrayal tears too deeply into me. It burrows its way into the depths of my very soul.

  Eric leaves the room while I just stand there.

  How could Trent do this to me?

  ***

  “Fliss?” Becca says into the dark. “You missed dinner…are you okay?”

  No music plays tonight. My phone is off because I don’t want to talk to Trent right now.

  I can’t talk to Trent right now.

  Tomorrow’s Christmas Eve and it’s shaping up to be another bad year.

  I don’t answer Becca. I pretend to sleep instead. I don’t want to talk about it right now.

  More than anything? I hate that I was right.

  It’s better to be alone.

  ***

  Trent

  When Fliss doesn’t answer around lunch I assume she’s busy.

  When she doesn’t text back after work I start to worry.

  When I call her and find her phone off, I hope it’s just some fluke.

  Only this brick in my stomach knows better. It knows that something’s very wrong. Fliss has never left me hanging like this before. I can’t help but wonder if Eric let the cat out of the bag.

  If he did, she must hate me.

  Today my plan was to take Fliss to meet my family. I thought maybe once she meets my Mom (even my drunk ass Dad) that she’d understand when I explain everything.

  It’s something she needs to hear from me.

  Not from that asshole.

  I can’t just sit here. I can’t not know if Felicity is okay.

  Fuck it.

  I grab my keys and start the drive to her place to find out.

  ***

  “Hey,” The tone in Becca’s voice says it all as she answers the door.

  “Shit.”

  Her eyes study me for a moment before she pulls the door shut behind her to join me on the porch.

  “Good.” She says. “Maybe you can tell me what the fuck is going on?”

  A huge gush of air rushes out of me. The explanation follows. About halfway through I end up giving Becca my coat. It’s fucking cold out here.

  “That grimy motherfucker,” Becca spits. “I’m going to have Will kick his ass.”

  “That still won’t solve the problem.” I say sadly. “Any chance I can see her?”

  “I think she’s sleeping.” Becca says. “If not, she definitely doesn’t want to talk.”

  My shoulders fall.

  My world falls.

  And completely shatters.

  I begin to walk away, but a hand on my arm stops me.

  “Trent? Give me your number and let me think about what to do next. We’ll figure this out together.”

  “Why are you helping me?” I have to ask.

  Becca’s smile is sincere as she answers. “Because I haven’t ever seen her as happy as she is with you—and I’m not going to let that shithead ruin it.”

  “Thank you.”

  Becca gives me a hard look. “Don’t ever make me regret it.” She hands my coat back.

  ***

  Felicity

  I hear the door downstairs, someone go out and eventually come back in. I still don’t move. I still don’t want to deal with anything.

  I stare at the ceiling for a long time. I may sleep an hour or two, but I recall the exact moment the sun begins to rise. I drag myself into the shower again and just stand under the hot water.

  It does nothing to the cold I feel inside.

  Like a robot I dress. I wrap the few presents I have left and place them under the tree. I’m not hungry, but I force down some food. I don’t have coffee today, though.

  The thought of it just doesn’t appeal to me.

  I smile for Becca—even though we both know it’s fake. I do everything
expected from a person on Christmas Eve.

  Except for the happiness.

  I don’t do that at all.

  ***

  Trent

  To say my night was lousy is the understatement of the year. This morning isn’t shaping up to be much better, either.

  Merry fucking Christmas.

  When my phone goes off I actually fall out of bed from the shock of it…and maybe the anticipation that it could be Fliss.

  Only it’s not. It’s Becca.

  Becca: Hey. I have a plan. Get your mom to mass tonight in town. I’ll handle the rest.

  Me: Okay…

  Becca: Just trust me. Does your mom know about Fliss already?

  Me: Mostly.

  Becca: Good. I’ll need her number

  I shake my head, but send it.

  Me: Anything else?

  Becca: Nope. Try not to worry too much.

  Right.

  ***

  “Mom, did you talk to Becca?” I’m getting desperate here.

  “Yes, I did.” She says without further explanation. “You should’ve told that girl right away, Trent.”

  “I know, Mom. I was scared to.”

  She pauses to place her hand on my shoulder. I look down at her, as I have for years now.

  “Sometimes life is scary, son—but those are the moments that matter most.”

  “Yeah…” I study her for a moment. “You’re not going to tell me what’s going on, are you?”

  She grins. “Nope. Consider it part of your punishment for being a dumbass.” She pats my shoulder and walks away before I can respond.

  Did my mom just call me a dumbass?

  Chapter Eight

  "Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."

  ~Martin Luther King, Jr.

  Felicity

  “C’mon, Fliss—I bet it’ll do you some good. It’s tradition for Will.” Becca pleads her case.

  “Fine!” I agree. It’s Christmas after all. “I’ll go. Just calm down.”

  Becca jumps up and down excitedly. “I’m going to go get ready!”

  I give her a funny look.

  “Fliss, you dress up for church.”

  Oh, joy. “Alright, alright.” I look down at my jeans and long sleeve black thermal. “I’ll go change.”

  Luckily I brought one nice outfit. I don it and try to tame my hair a little. That will have to do.

  It’s not like I’m trying to impress anyone, anyway.

  I can’t help the sigh that escapes. Being angry and hurt by Trent doesn’t stop the pain of missing him. And I miss him hard.

  The pain of not having any contact with him hurts more than the pain from his betrayal.

  What kind of person does that make me?

  “Fliss, come on!” Becca calls.

  Apparently, the kind that needs to go to church.

  ***

  Trent

  I’ve heard nothing from no one and I’m losing my shit—on the inside at least. On the outside I help handle the rush of last-minute Christmas shoppers and their need for caffeine. We’re only open for another couple of hours and the shop is closed tomorrow.

  Felicity never questions how much I work or that my barista job seems like a dead-end one. She knows I graduated last year with a business degree. I never got to tell her the reason I work almost every day here is because it’s mine.

  I never got to tell her a lot of things.

  I can’t rush out of here and find Fliss like my heart tells me to.

  Instead I cling to the hope that my Mom and Becca know how to fix all this shit.

  ***

  Felicity

  The church itself is absolutely incredible. It’s all gables and high ceilings, archways and polished wood. While it should all be too much it has the opposite effect. It calms me.

  I follow Will and Becca and sit. Others still bustle in. They remove their jackets and get comfortable like we have. I people watch to music in my head.

  Even through the calm I feel the sad.

  The empty.

  The spot where Trent should be.

  I admit to myself how much I miss him. I try to push aside my anger and hurt to see Trent’s side of it. I don’t agree with his decision not to tell me, but I guess I understand it.

  Now I just have to see if I can handle the reason why.

  Either Trent was scared of my reaction…or it didn’t matter if I found out because I’m just a fling for him.

  Before I can begin to overthink both avenues, an older gentleman takes his place and begins to speak. So different from the churches I’d attend as a child, this man speaks of love, forgiveness and new beginnings. It’s as if he speaks just for me—for my heartache. His words resonate as the hymns begin.

  I feel a squeeze on my hand and look up to see Becca smile at me with teary eyes. She knows something’s up, but I’ve yet to explain. Oddly enough, she’s yet to push—something very out of character for her.

  The mass ends and everyone begins to trickle out. Becca and Will sit and wait so I do the same. I’m not sure I’m ready to go yet anyway. I need more time to think.

  When the aisle begins to clear Becca begins to pull her coat on.

  “Can I have another minute?” I ask her quietly. “I’ll meet you guys outside?”

  “Absolutely,” Becca answers quickly. “Take as much time as you need. We’ll be out front.” She takes Will’s arm and together they leave me alone on the bench.

  By now the church is almost empty. As I stare at the stained-glass window I notice someone approach out of the corner of my eye.

  She looks familiar somehow—but I know immediately that I’ve never met her before. Her eyes…something about them…

  “Mind if I sit?” She asks, startling me.

  “Um, no. Not at all.”

  “Merry Christmas.” She says.

  “Merry Christmas…” I’m not sure what to say. I’m still trying to figure out where I may know her from.

  “I wanted to introduce myself and have a talk with you.” She tells me. “My name’s Amelia.” She takes a deep breath. “I’m Trent’s mother.”

  Ohhhhhhh. That explains it.

  “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” I say sincerely. She’s a very warm woman. “I’m Felicity, but I’m guessing that you already know that.”

  Amelia chuckles. “I do. I’m guessing you may know what I’m here for.”

  “I have an idea.” I say quietly.

  She pats my hand gently. “I know, darling. If it makes you feel any better I yelled at him—called him a coward and a dumbass.”

  This does make me chuckle. “It helps a little.”

  “I do want to set some things straight, though.” She continues. “Would that be okay?”

  “Absolutely,” I agree quickly.

  “I want you to know that while my husband’s family ties with the gang run deep, our family ties do not. When Trent was born I insisted we move here. I was hell-bent that my boy wouldn’t grow up to be a gangbanger. My husband isn’t good for much, but that man loves me enough to do it. And it worked. Trent can’t stand the gang…something he learned from me.

  “I just want you to be aware that him holding back was not done maliciously. It was his fear of losing you that held his tongue. Can I speak freely?”

  I nod because I’m a little speechless at the moment.

  “I’ve been waiting a long time for my Trent to find someone. I’m very happy to see you and I hope his dumbass didn’t wreck it already.”

  I half-laugh, half-cry. “I’m very happy to see you, too.” I manage and blot at my eyes. “So what do we do now?”

  Amelia grins.

  ***

  Trent

  I let everyone else out as early as possible because it’s Christmas Eve and clean up alone. I drag it out a little more than necessary because I want to mope and I know it’
s safer to do here.

  My mom already thinks I’m a dumbass, after all.

  Eventually I admit that there’s nothing left to do and lock up. I take a moment and allow a bit of pride to swell while I look at my shop. It’s not easy, but it’s successful.

  And it’s mine.

  It means a lot to me to be able to take care of my Mom (and Dad, I guess) after all the hard years she worked to support us while my Dad drank. I worked my ass off first in high-school and then in community college to graduate early. When the original owner of the coffeehouse decided to retire down south, I had just enough saved to make him an offer. It shocked me when he accepted, and I never looked back.

  I recall how it just seemed so meant to be. I guess that’s what life boils down to.

  I just hope Felicity is something that is meant to be.

  Only time will tell.

  Chapter Nine

  "It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody."

  ~Maya Angelou

  Felicity

  Becca is hard to contain when I get back. She grabs a bottle of wine and some snacks, kisses Will, and declares it a girl’s night.

  As the wine bottle grows empty I learn that Becca called Amelia after Trent fessed up to her. “You were so freaking happy with him, Fliss. I couldn’t let it end like that.”

  “It’s okay, Beck. I’m glad you’re a nosy bitch.” I give her a shoulder bump and we crack up.

  “Me, too.” She says when we recover. “So you’re all set for tomorrow?”

  “I think so.” I grin. “You two really did all the work.”

  “Yeah, you just got to be at the right place at the right time.” Becca reminds me…again.

  “I know. I will be.” I assure her through my wine-fog. “I just wish…”

  “What, babes?”

  “I wish I knew what Eric’s deal was.”

  Becca’s eyes narrow. “I still want Will to kick his ass.”

  “I think Trent should get that luxury if it’s granted.” I point out.

  “Yes!” Becca laughs. She splits the rest of the bottle between our two glasses and slurps hers down.