One Step Ahead

by J. J. Kapka

  After striking out in Munich, Becker had continued on to Venice undaunted. He just had a feeling that Maddie was close by somewhere out there. It was only a matter of timing. If he stuck to the major streets and popular tourist haunts, he knew he stood a good chance of running into her. And if he could just sit down and talk to her, he was confident he could turn things around.

  After the first two days with no luck, Becker had to concentrate as much on keeping a positive attitude as on looking for Maddie. He kept silently voicing encouragement to himself that the next place was going to do the trick. On this third morning, he’d spent the last half hour hanging around the vicinity of the Bridge of Sighs and had decided to do a pass through St. Mark’s Square just for good measure before going to the Doges Palace.

  His heart skipped a beat when he saw her sitting at an outdoor café table about thirty feet away, and he nearly stumbled. He was so excited at the thought of finally accomplishing his mission that he paid no mind to the man sitting at the table with her. He kept walking in her direction, ready to give her a wave of greeting when she saw him.

  When Maddie looked over and realized it was Becker, her face drained of color, and she hastily jumped up from the table to run away.

  What the… Becker couldn’t fathom why Madison reacted so strongly. Whatever the reason, he wasn’t about to let her out of his sight after spending so much time searching for her. He could explain…

  “Ouch!” Surprised by the sudden strong grasp on his right arm, he looked to see who was holding him back, and did a double take when he found himself staring into some kind of elaborate mask. Whoever was behind the mask had a mighty forceful grip. Looking into the burning eyes, he could tell the owner was none too happy with him. “Would you take your hand off of me?” Becker said indignantly.

  “No,” the mask replied. “I think you’d better let Maddie go.”

  Becker was startled that this masked man knew Maddie’s name, and was even further rattled that he was taking physical measures to keep Becker from getting to Maddie. What’s up?

  “Sit down,” the mask ordered. “She’s gone now, anyway. I know she doesn’t want to be found by you. But I have a few things to say to you.”

  Becker felt helpless. Maddie was gone. While he could probably chase around trying to find her, he realized this man somehow knew her and was thus his only connection to her. Still trying to shake off the man’s hold on his arm, Becker slid into Maddie’s vacated chair.

  When the man sensed Becker wasn’t about to go anywhere, he released him. Taking a seat, the man removed his mask.

  Great, Becker thought, another handsome guy. What on earth is Maddie up to?

  “My name’s Paul,” the man said by way of greeting. He waved off Becker’s extended hand with a stern frown. “I heard all about you from Maddie. Or at least, I heard about how you broke up with Maddie. It might be none of my business, but I don’t like what you did or how you did it. I can’t see shaking your hand as though I want to know you better, because frankly, I know enough. Maddie seems like a good woman who didn’t deserve what you did to her.”

  Becker slumped forward with his elbows on the table and his head in his hands. “I know. I agree,” he said, expelling a long sigh.

  “Come again?” Paul asked, apparently taken aback by Becker’s reaction.

  “You’re right. I shouldn’t have done what I did. That’s what I was coming to tell Maddie.” Becker looked hopelessly over at Paul. “I’ve spent the entire past week looking all over for her. And now I’ve lost her again.” His face crumpled, and he struggled to hold back tears. Miserably, he added, “I have no idea why I’m telling you all this.”

  Paul raised his eyebrows, seemingly intrigued. Motioning for a waiter to come over, he ordered a couple of espressos.

  While waiting for their order, Becker looked aside helplessly. How will I find Maddie again, when it’s so obvious she doesn’t want to be found? As the waiter set their cups in front of them, he said as much to Paul. He was so completely out of ideas at this point that he was desperate enough to seek advice from a complete stranger who obviously had Maddie’s best interests in mind and couldn’t care less about him.

  “Damn,” Paul said. “This isn’t what I expected at all. I thought maybe I’d have to clock you one to keep you from going after your wife. And then maybe another one for good measure because of what you did to her, but I definitely wasn’t expecting you to be waving the white flag.”

  “Oh, trust me, I know how ridiculous this looks. You wouldn’t believe how insane my life has been since I told Maddie I wanted to leave her. I can’t believe I was actually stupid enough to think for a minute that I wanted to live without her.” Becker stirred some sugar into his espresso and took a bracing sip. Then he looked Paul square in the eye and started to relate all that had happened to him since he’d broken up with Maddie, beginning with the plate of bangers and mash on his head, and ending with his relentless quest to find her again to somehow patch things up.

  “Boy, you are a hurting unit,” Paul said with a note of sympathy in his voice. “Now I feel like a jerk for stopping you from getting to Maddie.”

  “Why did she run away, anyway?” Becker agonized over the question.

  Paul told Becker how Maddie had seen Becker the other night and consequently, got on the gondola to avoid running into him. He related how hurt she had seemed when she told him what had happened between the two of them in London. “You pulled the rug out from under her life,” he noted. “Why wouldn’t she run from you?”

  Nodding in sad concurrence, Becker threw up his hands in supplication. “What can I do? How can I get to her? Do you know where she’s staying?”

  Paul look conflicted. “Look, I know where you’re coming from, and I’m glad you want to make it right. But I wouldn’t feel good just telling you where Maddie is when she was so frightened and completely adamant about not wanting to talk to you.”

  Becker twisted in his seat in frustration, but Paul motioned for him to stop. “That doesn’t mean I won’t help. The last thing Maddie said was that she would try to say goodbye to me.” Seeming to catch the implications, he hastened to add, “We had a good time together—as friends, fellow New Yorkers—that kind of thing. What I’d be willing to do is to arrange a meeting between you and her. Tell me where you’re staying, and if she makes contact with me tonight, I’ll come see you tomorrow and let you know how it went. Sound like a plan?”

  Becker shrugged his shoulders and said, “It’s all I’ve got. I don’t know what else to do. But promise me you’ll do your damnedest.”

  Paul smiled and finally extended his hand. “Would my willingness to shake your hand now be a clue that you’ve won me over?”

  With a sigh of relief, Becker shook Paul’s hand. “If you can do this, I owe you big time.”

  Paul replied, “You owe me nothing. If you make it up to Maddie, that’s all the thanks I want.”

  ~~~

  July 17—Late

  Maddie’s heart beat so hard, she felt her chest would explode. Her breath, when she had any, came in big, noisy gasps, and she bent over double with side stitches. She’d run flat out for the past ten minutes, headed somewhere in the general direction of her hotel. After getting herself oriented again through the use of her map and a few queries from friendly passersby, she gratefully entered her hotel lobby and immediately retreated to her room. She felt like barricading the door. Instead, she simply locked it before throwing herself on the bed and balling herself into a cocoon.

  It was now obvious that Becker had been looking for her. He had seemed pretty determined. Her suspicion the other night had been correct. She regretted that her day in Verona with Paul had led her to let her guard down. How could she have been so foolish as to sit right out there in St. Mark’s Square, when she suspected that Becker was looking for her? It was a prime location to see and be seen.

  Now that she was safely locked in her room, her whole body shook and tears welle
d up in her eyes. Damn. She didn’t want to have to think about Becker. There was a world of hurt locked up inside her. She’d managed to live with it up till now because of all the wonderful distractions that had come her way. She’d been successful at beating back any thoughts of what her future held by promising herself that she would fully examine her feelings only after she returned home. Becker’s appearance forced her long tamped-down emotions to the surface, and it wasn’t long before full-throttled sobs tore from her being.

  Gathering up a pillow, she tried to muffle her cries as best she could while still allowing herself to breathe. So much had been pent up inside, though, that Maddie cried for a good long time before her tears started to subside into complete exhaustion, which in turn led to a deep, dreamless sleep.

  Waking again in the late afternoon and coming to the full realization of what had occurred, Maddie decided she couldn’t go on this way, constantly worrying about Becker coming around a corner and chasing her. She didn’t feel she owed him the time of day at this point, and whatever he had to say could wait till the vacation was over. Maddie knew that he had a pretty good idea of where to look for her because they’d spent countless hours plotting out their itinerary at home. Although they had open round-the-world tickets, in order to pack appropriately and buy guidebooks and let people know where they were going to be in case of emergency, they’d established a pretty set schedule.

  Clearly, from this point on, she would need to take a detour from the planned route. Becker could try to track her down to his heart’s content, but as far as she was concerned, she was going to be miles—if not continents—away. Happy to have a task to grab hold of to take her mind off the weight in her heart, she eagerly extracted her maps and guidebooks and started planning. Determined to forge ahead and enjoy her vacation, she easily came up with alternatives. She only stopped to make one quick phone call to the airlines to arrange a flight to Rome for tomorrow before the offices closed down for the day. Then she continued to study the destinations for the remainder of her trip.

  When she finally looked up after finishing her research, she was amazed to find it was already dark. She hadn’t eaten a thing since breakfast and was starving. Not ready to chance another meeting with Becker before she could fly out tomorrow, she called downstairs and arranged for room service to bring dinner up. She quietly passed another couple of hours picking at the food while continuing to pour over her destinations, with an eye toward the potential for more unique experiences like those that had made her previous stops so much more enriching than she’d expected. Of course, the people factor had been a big part of why she’d had such an enjoyable time. Unlike when she’d first left London, she would now make a point of seeking out the people, not just the places.

  There was one final thing she needed to do here in Venice. Glancing at her watch and seeing that it was close to midnight, Maddie knew that if she was going to go out and say goodbye to Paul, it was now or never. She was genuinely sorry she couldn’t spend more time with Paul, but at least she knew they’d meet again in New York, and that thought also served to perk up her mood.

  Despite the hour, Maddie still feared there might be a chance of seeing Becker, so she quickly slipped down to the canal dock and found a water taxi to take her to Paul’s area. Although he wasn’t there when they pulled up to the dock, she felt confident that he’d be back soon, as it was getting close to the end of his shift. She paid the taxi and stepped up onto the sidewalk, finding a dark stoop nearby to wait for Paul’s return.

  About fifteen minutes later, she heard a faint splashing sound and turned her head to see a gondola approaching. There was an elderly couple on board, and the shadow of the gondolier was distinctly Paul’s shape. Waiting quietly until the couple had disembarked and Paul had tethered the boat for the night, she walked out of the shadow of the building and whispered his name.

  Startled, Paul turned around. It took a minute for him to recognize her in the dark, but the minute he did, he crossed over to her in three big steps and grasped her in a big bear hug. “I was hoping you were going to come back like you said you would,” he exclaimed. “I’ve been waiting for you all night and had all but given up.”

  “I wouldn’t think of leaving without saying goodbye to you. Besides, I wanted to get your phone number in New York so we can get together when we get back.”

  “That would be terrific, but there’s something else I need to talk to you about, too.”

  “Oh, I guess you mean to ask about what happened today.” Maddie shook her head and continued on in a rush. “I’m sorry to have put you in that position. You know, I took one look at Becker and absolutely panicked. The only thing I could think of was to get out of there fast and not look back. I went straight to my hotel, had a good cry, and decided I need to get out of here and travel on to someplace that he won’t anticipate. I can’t stand this uncertainty of not knowing whether I’m going to see him every time I turn a corner.”

  Sheepishly, Maddie gazed up at Paul while grabbing his arms in a squeeze. “I’m really sorry to have put you in an awkward position by asking you to stop him. That was stupid of me. Did he…was he upset with you?”

  Paul shook his head no. Looking around, he said, “It’s complicated. This isn’t a good place to talk. C’mon up to my room, and I’ll explain it all to you. It’s just around the corner.” He grabbed her hand and led her to a small doorway. After unlocking the door, he led her up a flight of steps and then unlocked another door to the right of the landing. “It’s a bit small in here, but I spend so little time in the room, what with the job and the research, it suits my needs just fine. It even lets me bankroll a good part of my summer earnings to help me cope with my New York rent.”

  Turning on the table lamps, he opened a cabinet and extracted a bottle of red wine and a couple of glasses, pouring them all the way up before finally sitting down across from Maddie on the couch.

  “So?” Maddie asked with trepidation. “What happened?”

  “Remember just now when you asked if he was upset with me?”

  Maddie nodded. “Was he?”

  “No. The fact of the matter is that he’s upset with himself. He’s been looking all over for you, but not for the reasons you thought. He wants you back. He realizes he made a big mistake, and the poor guy’s beside himself not knowing what to do.”

  Dumbfounded, Maddie had to put her glass down before leaning back in absolute shock. After the way Becker had broken things off in London, it had seemed pretty clear there was no turning back. She was completely unprepared for this turn of events.

  Paul continued, “He’s been through a lot. He told me what’s been going on since you two split up, and…”

  “What happened?” Maddie was eager to find out what had caused this change of heart.

  “I don’t think it’d be fair for me to say much more. It’d be better to hear it from Becker. He wants to talk to you badly. He wanted me to tell him where you were staying, but I didn’t think it’d be right to do that to you, knowing how you felt.”

  “I don’t know what to do,” Maddie said, shaking her head. “He says he wants to get back together, but what if he changes his mind again a week, or a month, or a year down the road? The first time it came out of the clear blue sky, but now I’ll constantly be on pins and needles worrying when it might happen again.”

  Paul leaned over and put his arm around Maddie’s shoulders. “Look, I haven’t known you very long, and I’ve known Becker even less time, so it’s not my place to be giving advice. But I don’t think I’m sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong if I just say that it wouldn’t hurt for you to meet with him and hear him out. Say the same things to him that you just said to me. Then decide.”

  Maddie mulled this over. She was concerned that if she met with Becker, the same panic would overcome her, and she’d make a hasty decision. Still, what Paul said made sense. If she could just hold her emotions in check and give Becker a chance to explain himself, she felt
she could pull off this meeting.

  But she’d already made her booking to leave tomorrow morning for Rome instead of Athens. They wouldn’t have time to meet here before she left, and Maddie had no idea whether Becker would even want to make a detour to Rome to meet with her. She told Paul about the complication, and they spent a while discussing what they should propose to Becker. Finally, they agreed to tell Becker to meet Maddie on the Spanish Steps the next evening at 8:00. Paul would pass the message on first thing in the morning. That would give Becker most of the day to get on the short flight to Rome. If he didn’t make it, Maddie would just carry on as she’d planned earlier in the day.

  Since it was already so late, and she had to leave early in the morning for the airport, Madison told Paul she had to head back to the hotel. He insisted on walking her there, given how late it was. When then reached the lobby, they gave each other a big hug and exchanged addresses and phone numbers. Paul told her to call him if she needed anything while she was still in Italy and said he’d be happy to help in whatever way he could. Maddie stood at the door waving as he walked away down the street, her heart barely contained in her chest as the full import of tomorrow started taking hold.

  ~~~

  The Becker Chronicles—Venice, Part Two

  It was useless trying to sleep. In fact, it was even worse that he’d gone through the motions and gotten in bed. He’d been tossing and turning for hours, and the sheets were a wrinkled, twisted mess. Becker realized he’d have been better off if he’d just sat up and read to try to take his mind off the fact that his future hung in the hands of a complete stranger.

  Can I trust this guy? Becker wondered. He obviously thought well of Maddie. He hoped that he’d made his case sufficiently compelling for Paul to convince Maddie of his desperation. The same doubts and hopes kept playing through his head the entire night. By the crack of dawn, he finally gave up the effort of trying to sleep, took a shower, and got changed. Knowing it was too early to hear anything yet from Paul, he went out and took a long walk until 7:00 a.m., when he knew the breakfast room at his hotel would be open.