Blue Love

by Mj Fields

  She laughed and the bell rang.

  “Did it work?” she asked.

  “Surprisingly it did, up until I opened my eyes and saw you,” Luke said in a whisper and kissed her cheek.

  “Maybe I should blind fold you before we kiss,” she said and looked at him. His nose flared and eyes closed, “Oh sorry, wow I wouldn’t have guessed. Dead Puppies?” she asked

  “A whole room full of them,” he said.

  He stopped at her door and kissed her head. “See you at lunch,” and he walked away.

  ~

  “So,” Becca said, “the big dance is tomorrow and we were thinking Mani Pedy’s and a bit of waxing tonight, the four of us.”

  “Sounds great,” Tessa said, “After practice?” she asked.

  “What sounds great?” Luke asked sitting next to Tessa.

  “The four of use going to get waxed,” Phoebe said laughing.

  Tessa looked at Luke, “You don’t mind do you?” he closed his eyes, “Dead puppies?” she asked. He laughed and shook his head, “wax?” she asked. He shook his head again. “We are going after practice to get Mani Pedy’s,” Tessa told him.

  “Right after?” Luke asked.

  “I think so, if we don’t we won’t be home until midnight,” she smiled.

  “Where are you going?” he asked.

  “Probably Ithaca,” she said.

  “Can I drive you,” he asked.

  “No I think I will ride with the girls, it would be silly for you to drive me,” she smiled.

  “I want to,” he said agitated.

  “Are you upset about this?” she asked.

  “No, it just means I won’t see you tonight,” he said.

  “But I will have pretty feet and nails for the dance on Saturday,” she said and smiled.

  “I like them the way they are,” he pouted.

  “I want to be beautiful for you,” she said and smiled

  “If it gets any better then you better bring a basket of those puppies with you,” he said and scowled.

  “Why don’t you Tommy and Alex go to dinner, I will text you where we are and when we should be done and maybe we can hook up after we have pretty piggy’s,” Tessa smiled.

  “Or maybe I will go home and pout,” Luke said.

  “If you do send me a picture, you’re hot when you pout,” she said and kissed his nose.

  ~

  After practice they showered and came out to the parking lot. She ran up and jumped on Luke’s back and kissed his neck. “Hey baby,” she said.

  “You really going?” Luke asked.

  “Yes father,” she said smiling.

  She looked at his eyes and knew he was disturbed by this. “Can you meet us?” Tessa asked.

  “We’ll see,” he said and kissed her head and walked away got in his car and sped away.

  “Is he pissed?” Jade asked.

  “I think he will just miss me,” Tessa said and smiled, “I told him to meet us for diner,” she said.

  The girls piled in the car and drove to town radio cranked and singing at the top of their lungs. They sat and where pampered as they talked and laughed. Tessa chose to do French tips so it looked like she actually had nails. Jade went red, Phoebe hot pink, and Becca light pink. They got their eyebrows waxed and Tessa wanted to get a bikini wax and she regretted it right away.

  -Hey baby what you are doing?...LYA.... Tessa.

  -Hanging at home…U2…Luke

  - won’t see you for dinner then…LYA Tessa.

  -see you at school, have fun…Luke

  “What the hell is that?” Tessa said out loud.

  “What’s going on?” Jade asked.

  Tessa read the messages. “What does LYA mean,” Jade asked.

  “Love you anyway” Tessa said quietly.

  “Well what’s that mean?” Phoebe asked.

  “For me it’s about loving him even though he has a crazy past, his anyways is because I haven’t put out,” Tessa said laughing.

  “Well let’s hit the drive through and drive over and see what’s up,” Jade said.

  “Sound like a plan,” Phoebe said.

  They went through and picked up food, they talked Tessa into a milk shake. The girls tried to cheer her up but she was numb.

  They pulled down his road, “His house is the colonial on the right about a mile up,” Tessa said.

  “What do you want me to do?” Becca asked.

  “Pull in the driveway I will run in and be right back,” Tessa said.

  Becca pulled in and Tessa jumped out, she ran to the side and walked through the gate.

  ~

  He was in the hot tub “Hey,” she said “missed you for dinner so I thought I would...” and she froze.

  Sadi’s head came out of the water and she smiled at him and she went to kiss him and he pulled away and stood up, he yanked his shorts up with him.

  Move just move she cried out in her head and her body wouldn’t listen.

  His voice broke the deafening ring throughout her body, “Fuck Tessa,” Luke yelled at her like she had done something wrong.

  She turned and ran.

  “Bye Tessa,” Sadi called after her.

  Luke grabbed her and said “I didn’t fuck her Tessa don’t be mad,” Tessa smelled alcohol.

  “I’m not mad Luke I am broken,” she went to turn and he pulled her towards him and tried to hug her. “Get your hands off of me before I scream,” Tessa tried to pull away.

  He shook his head no.

  Tears filled her eyes, “You are so much better than this, but I can’t,” she paused, “You need to let go of me now.”

  Jade saw her shaking and jumped out, “Tessa you okay?”

  Tessa held a finger up telling her just a minute.

  “Now Luke, let go of me now,” a tear fell and he wiped it off her face, “Don’t, I am not one of those weak needy sick bitches that is going to chase you, this is over. Take your hands off of me now.”

  “Tessa I know you hate me right now but I love you,” Luke said and looked at her through sad boyish eyes.

  “I don’t want that kind of love,” her tears were in her throat and she whimpered. “I was devastated when I met you and now I am broken. If you ever thought you loved me I am begging you,” she said and the tears flowed, “to leave me alone,” she closed her eyes and tipped her head back and turned and walked away.

  Sadi ran out and waved Jade started running towards her.

  Tessa grabbed her arm, “Don’t, I need you now, and this is done.”

  They drove home in complete silence. Becca didn’t turn on the radio for fear that a sappy song would come on. They pulled in the driveway and Jade and Tessa jumped out. Alex was waiting, Phoebe had texted him.

  He grabbed her and hugged her, she cried and whispered, “I am not going to fall apart.”

  “No you aren’t,” Alex said and the three of them walked in.

  ~

  Tessa grabbed a garbage bag from the kitchen and took it upstairs, she threw everything he had given her in it. And she set it by the door. She kissed Kendall and laid down in her bed, Jade climbed in and hugged her.

  “You’re going to be fine,” Jade whispered.

  “I am, but what a waste of a bikini wax,” she said and they laughed. “I have to sing the national anthem tomorrow at the game,” she laughed again. “Do you think they’d be pissed if I sang something like I hate everything about you?”

  “I think that’s a good plan,” Jade said.

  ~

  She fell asleep. The alarm went off and she jumped up and ran to Kendall and tickled her awake. “Do you want to go running with me?” she shook her head no and fell back to sleep.

  “Jade,” she whispered, “I am going for a run want to go?”

  “No but I feel obligated,” Jade said and sat up.

  They pulled into the Park and ran the stairs, five times. They ran an additional five miles.

  “Are we done yet?” Jade asked.

&n
bsp; “Yep, I feel those happy endorphins kicking in,” Tessa said with a big smile.

  Tessa and Jade went home and showered and got ready for the game. Alex left and promised not to act differently to Luke.

  “What are you going to wear?” Jade asked.

  “I don’t care, a burlap bag would be fine,” she joked.

  Jade grabbed an outfit, she was wearing jeans and a long sleeved school tee.

  She grabbed jeans and a low cut shirt for Tessa with a sweater that fit perfectly, navy blue of course.

  Chapter 12

  They walked onto the field just before it started and she just looked down. “Thank God you’re here Tessa you’re on in five minutes,” the announcer told her and shuffled her off to the center of the field, he did a mic check and the music started. She looked up and smiled. She decided to look to the sky and she breathed and sang perfectly, hitting every note. She received a standing ovation.

  “Thank you” Tessa whispered in the microphone.

  As she walked off, Toby Green, homecoming King and star quarterback from two years ago touched her shoulder, “You have an amazing voice Tessa Ross.” Toby used to do hay on the farm, she smiled and hugged him and he swung her around.

  “Wow,” he said looking her up and down and twirling her in a circle, “You are gorgeous”.

  “And you Toby are better looking than I remember,” Tessa said flirting on purpose which was totally out of character for her.

  “Tessa do you have a date for tonight’s dance?” Toby asked.

  “Actually I don’t, why do you ask,” she smiled.

  “That’s criminal,” Toby dropped to one knee and took her hand and kissed it. “Tessa Ross can I escort you to the dance tonight?” he asked his eyes beaming.

  “I think you’ll have to ask my brother, he is over on the bench,” Tessa said.

  “Stay here I will be right back,” Toby said.

  Jade came up, “Toby Green Tessa?” she said smiling, “He is hot!”

  “And right now he is asking Alex who happens to be standing next to Lucas if he can escort me to homecoming,” Tessa said smirking.

  ~

  They watched as he ran across the field. He grabbed her and swung her around and kissed her cheek, “He said I could as long as I was a gentleman.”

  “Great we can meet here at eight,” Tessa smiled.

  “No Miss Ross I will pick you up at seven thirty. I have to go announce homecoming court,” Toby smiled.

  The announcer announced him and he ran out on the field and received a standing ovation. He announced the court and of course Luke was called, her heart sank as he stared at her. “Jade he looks beautiful but he is hurting.”

  She gave him a half smile and he mouthed I love you; she shook her head no and looked down. When they were finished Luke walked through the crowd in his uniform, helmet in hand and up to her, “Yes I do, Tessa, don’t give up on me, I fucked up but I love you.”

  “Luke good luck today,” Tessa said and smiled at him. He stared intently into her eyes for what seemed like a long time and turned and walked away, shoulders slumped in and head hung down low.

  “What was that Tessa?” Jade asked.

  “I want him to be okay,” Tessa said, “Head in the game you know.”

  The game started and Toby came to sit with her. He put his arm around her. “So Tessa Ross the QB out there, was he your date?” she shook her head yes “Did he hurt you?”

  “First love thing you know,” Tessa choked out.

  “Did he cheat?” Toby asked, she shook her head yes.

  “We are going to have a lot of fun tonight to make him jealous, but for now I am going to sit down there so we win our game, ok?” She smiled at him, “And then you’ll see I am a way better catch, when you’re ready.” He said winking at her. “By the way what are you wearing?”

  “I have no idea,” she said and laughed.

  “I will be wearing a dark brown suit, make sure we don’t clash,” Toby got up and walked away.

  ~

  The Saints won the game. Tessa walked out and hugged Alex. Luke stood with his head down peering out at her through his beautiful long eyelashes.

  “Could you come with me please,” she asked him and he followed her to Jade’s car. She pulled the bag out from the back seat and handed it to him.

  Luke stepped back, “They were gifts baby,” he said looking wounded.

  “I don’t want them,” she said.

  “Tessa what can I do to fix this?” Luke said grabbing her hands.

  “Can you turn back time,” she asked. He shook his head no. “Then nothing Luke.”

  “I won’t accept that,” he said.

  “Then you never knew me, because I am not the do over kind of girl, I am not like them Luke,” Tessa said softly.

  “I know that, Tessa, you told me I broke you and I would do anything to put you back together, fuck Tessa I wish I was like you, you make me want to be better, and no one has ever made me feel that way. Please baby just let me explain,” Luke pleaded.

  “I went for a pedicure and came to see you because I knew by the texts that something was wrong and I walked into a girl who attacked me, a girl who you had just told you were sorry to the day before for treating her like a piece of meat, and someone who you profess to despise and her mouth was full of you. I will never be that person for you. And even though it was only six weeks, I did love you Luke, I would have done anything for you. And you thought so little of me that of all the people in the world you chose to fuck her,” Tessa said disgusted.

  “I did not fuck her Tessa…,” he started.

  “Okay Luke you fucked her mouth, the same mouth that spewed disgusting comments about her to the person you profess to love. Do you know how wrong that is,” she snapped, “Do you?”

  “I do,” he said looking down and his eyes began to fill.

  Tessa’s heart raced, she didn’t want to see him cry, “Please don’t,” she said. “Please don’t.”

  “What can I do Tessa? Just tell me what I can do,” tears started falling down his face. She wiped them away leaving her hand on his perfect lips and rubbing them gently.

  He pulled her into him and hugged her, “I have never cried over a girl,” he whispered in her ear, “I have never loved another, not truly loved them, I have never Tessa wanted someone the way I want you and didn’t take you when you offered it to me on a silver platter. You deserve a better me, and I will prove that I can be that person for you if it takes me forever. And I won’t fail once I have won you back. I Love you,” she wanted to believe him, to kiss him, she wanted him in every way but they were just words.

  He could feel her hot breath on his face and he knew she wanted to believe him, he knew she loved him. He pulled her away and gently kissed her forehead.

  She looked at him, “Do it for you Luke not for me.”

  “I will and then it’s you and me forever,” he said, “See you tonight.”

  “Luke I am going with someone,” Tessa said.

  “I know but I also know you will be okay, you’re not like me,” Luke said.

  ~

  Jade pulled through again, she brought down a dark brown halter dress that was opened in the back, her hair was swept half up and she wore gold accessories. Jade helped her with her makeup. Jade wore red, of course and very high heels. She looked amazing and with her that was effortless. Tessa looked in the mirror and almost didn’t recognize herself. She smiled, “Good work Jade” she smiled at herself and turned to Jade, “you are stunning Jade Ross, as usual, Tommy is a lucky boy.”

  Her phone chimed, she looked down to see his picture.

  -I wish it was me taking you tonight, I wish I could let you see what I know is there, deep underneath the black in my heart, Day 1 without Tessa Ross breaks my heart….LYA Luke

  She turned her phone off. I need to change that picture she thought.

  ~

  She heard a knock on the door and she and Jade walked into the kit
chen, it was Tommy and he looked amazing, the way he looked at Jade was absolutely priceless, he was in awe of her and she of him.

  “See you at the dance Tessa, text me when you pull in so I know to look for you,” Jade and Tommy left for dinner.

  “Tessa you look amazing,” Alex smiled.

  “And Phoebe is a lucky girl to have arm candy like you tonight,” Tessa smiled.

  “What did he do to you?” Alex frowned.

  “Nothing physical Alex, I will be fine, first crush that’s all,” she smiled weakly at him.

  Alex hugged her and left to go pick up Phoebe. She stood looking out the window and thought of how awful her senior year has been so far. But it would be okay.

  She saw Toby pull in in his Blue Jeep wrangler. She walked out the door and he met her, “Tessa you look stunning,” he said and his eyes lit up.

  “Well thank you, you look hot Green,” she said as she went for the door.

  He beat her to it and opened it for her, she smiled and got in. “Thank you sir,” Tessa said.

  “Where’s your Dad?” Toby asked jumping in the driver’s seat.

  “He is in the shop,” Tessa answered.

  “Can we go say hi?” he asked.

  “Of course,” she smiled.

  They pulled out back and her father walked out of the shop.

  “Hey Toby how are things,” John said wiping the grease off his hands before shaking his.

  “They are great I am off for the long weekend and then back to Annapolis,” he said, “I wanted you to know she is in great hands tonight, John.”

  “I have no worries with you Toby,” he smiled and patted his back.

  “Could you take a picture of us?” he asked and handed him his camera.

  They stepped out and John took several shots. Toby opened the door for her again and they drove out.

  “You are going to be okay Tessa,” he said squeezing her hand. “That boy is going to regret messing with my date. Are you ready to put on a show,” he asked smiling.

  “I am Toby,” Tessa said smiling.

  ~

  They pulled into the school and she texted Jade. Toby jumped out and ran around the Jeep, he opened the door for her and took her hand helping her out. He held out his arm and she took it. A little red convertible parked a few feet away, a tall leggy brunette got out of the car, the passenger door opened and Luke got out. He had a black suit and sunglasses on. They started walking towards them, “That him?” Toby asked, “Show time.” He slide his hand around her and placed it very low on her bare back, he took her hand and shoved it in his back pocket, as they walked by he kissed her and held her close.