Beautiful Broken Promises

by Kimberly Lauren

“I’m sure you’ll be just as strong, buddy,” I chuckled. “Just remember you have to eat all of your vegetables. I bet Lane always eats his spinach.”

  The crease in Braden’s nose crinkled and I could tell he was deep in thought. I had a feeling he was weighing the odds of leafy greens actually causing muscles in his head, which made me laugh to myself.

  “Let’s let him sleep in a bit more. We can go play in the other room until he wakes up.”

  “But...” Kate hesitated. “I think he would be sad if we were gone.”

  “We’ll be super quiet, mama,” Braden added with an exaggerated whisper.

  “Alright. Well, I’m going to take a shower, but I’m serious you two, do not wake him up.” I dumped out books from the backpack and even some crayons and coloring pages for them to share.

  “Thank you, mama,” Kate murmured. My heart clenched at her words. How much longer did I get to be her “Mama”? I just couldn’t stand the idea of it being any different, but I knew things would unquestionably change sometime soon.

  LANE -

  Sleeping on the floor probably would have been a better choice than that tiny-ass couch. My legs were hanging off the arm of one side and my feet were asleep from the blood loss. That annoying pins-and-needles feeling poked from the inside out. I slowly twisted my feet in a circular motion and turned my head toward the tiny whispers that came from the bed.

  Kate and Braden were leaning toward one another, deep in conversation.

  “That’s a really good job, sissy,” Braden said.

  “Thanks. I’m making it for you, and you can add it to the other pictures I made you,” she replied.

  “I don’t think we’re going to get to go back and get all of our things from home,” he stated solemnly.

  She shrugged and told him, “It’s okay, I like it here better. Daddy’s here.”

  “He’s your daddy, not mine,” Braden expressed sadly.

  “Maybe he can be your daddy, too.” She looked up at him with so much hope in her eyes, I almost wanted to be the kid’s dad just so that look would always stay there on her sweet face.

  “No, I got mama and you got your daddy.”

  “But, I want mama too,” she panicked.

  “Don’t worry, Kate. I’m your big brother and brothers have to take care of their sisters.” I swore that little guy puffed out his chest with those words. Kate leaned over and kissed him loudly on the cheek, and he giggled while swiping his hands across his face. “Eww, Kate!” he protested while continuing to laugh.

  I decided to take that moment and sit up. The laughter immediately died from both of their faces and I felt kind of bad for surprising them.

  “Morning,” I said with a rasp.

  “Braden! Mama said we couldn’t wake him up. He needs sleep,” Kate said in an accusatory tone.

  “Sorry.” Braden looked up at me and spoke quietly.

  “You guys are fine. It was about time I woke up anyway.” I glanced at the clock and groaned when I saw that it was close to noon. Charlie would be calling soon, wondering why the hell we hadn’t come back to the station yet. “I bet you two are starving, huh?”

  They both stood up and flew into excited balls of energy, telling me how their stomachs had been growling all morning. The theatrics of it all made me chuckle. The silly noises caused each other to laugh as well, and they fell back down onto the bed in hysterics.

  I made a request down to room service and practically ordered the entire menu—twice. I had no idea what they liked but what they didn’t eat, I would finish off. I had never gone that long without eating. Usually, I was stuffing my face every hour and now my stomach was cramping in pain from the lack of nourishment.

  I heard Raegan moving around in the bathroom so I got up to go speak with her, away from little ears. On my way over, I leaned down and kissed Kate on the top of her head. She wrapped her arms around my neck before I could lift away and planted one right on my cheek. I still didn’t understand all of it, but hell, I would take all the love she had to give. She released my neck and let me continue toward the bathroom.

  The bathroom door clicked open and I pushed my way inside before Raegan could make her way out.

  “What the...” she grunted from my unexpected intrusion. “Rude!”

  “Hey, I wanted to talk...” Crap... I hadn’t planned my invasion very well. Raegan stood about six inches shorter than me, so I hadn’t noticed at first because her head only came up to my chest, but... she was only wearing a towel and her heavy breasts created a magnificent swell, poking out from the top.

  She hiked her towel up higher, but it didn’t help one bit. It only caused them to jiggle and made the scenario even more difficult for me. I shifted, in case I needed to hide a growing problem.

  “Lane… stop!” she breathed out.

  “I’m sorry,” I chuckled. “I swear I’m not usually this juvenile.” She quirked an eyebrow up at me in apparent disbelief. “Okay, I’ve got it under control,” I said. Fuck, she was hot. I so did not have it under control. I forced my eyes to her face. When I quickly looked over at the cut on her head, I immediately sobered.

  “Shit, Raegan, your head.” I searched frantically for something I could use to clean up her cut, which was bleeding down the side of her face. What the hell were these stitches doing if she kept bleeding out of them? I applied a gentle pressure with a wad of tissues. She sucked in air and I jumped to apologize, “I’m sorry. I just need to get the bleeding to stop.”

  She moved to grab the tissue, but then realized that she needed both of her hands on the towel so she relented and mumbled, “Thank you.”

  “How are you feeling?”

  “Still dizzy and tired, but I think that’s normal.”

  “Can I ask what happened now?” I requested softly, as if I were approaching a wounded animal.

  “Can I answer when I have my clothes on?” She looked up at me through long eyelashes and I was gutted by those green eyes.

  “I prefer you like this... but I guess for the kids’ sake, it’s more appropriate.” I tried giving her my sexiest smirk.

  I slowly retreated backward out of the bathroom. “Oh, don’t even try that playboy smile on me. It won’t work, mister.”

  I clutched my chest. “Playboy smile? I’m offended!” I exclaimed teasingly.

  She shrugged her shoulders in a knowing fashion, the action causing her breasts to rise and fall heavily. I wanted to pounce on her.

  I started to speak and she held up a finger to stop me. “You’re probably about to defend yourself, but I don’t need you to. Guys who look like you are playboys. I knew guys like you before...” She paused and seemed to consider her words carefully. “I just knew guys like you.” Her sexy smile told me she was messing with me, but I could tell she still believed her words.

  “I’m sure you didn’t know anyone like me,” I had to add.

  “Oh yeah? Tell me this, Lane, when was the last time you had sex?”

  I cringed instantly. I knew I had just given myself away, but I still didn’t want to answer. I couldn’t tell her that I had actually been in bed with a girl when I got the call to go to Mexico.

  “Wow, that recent, huh?” She chuckled at my unease and gently pushed me out of the bathroom so she could finish up.

  With the door quietly closed in my face, I had to think hard about why I didn’t like her knowing I had been with another woman not so long ago. She didn’t know me. Hell, I didn’t know her. I shouldn’t even care. I had Kate to worry about right now.

  A knock on the hotel room door pushed my battling thoughts into the back of my mind. I greeted the gentleman and allowed him to push the full-service cart through the doorway. He lifted up the tablecloth to show me that there was more underneath. We both laughed at my over-eagerness as he backed his way out of the room.

  I had the kids set up at the table with all of their choices and glasses of milk before I decided to take two more plates into the other room.

  “Ra
egan and I are going to be in the other room eating, is that okay?” I asked the two of them.

  “Yep!” they simultaneously responded with chipmunk-cheek smiles. They really were hungry. I shouldn’t have let them go that long without something to eat.

  I heard Raegan turn on the blow dryer as I made my way into the connecting room. I figured I had a few moments to myself since her hair was so long and decided to use that time to finally call Audrey back, even though I was dying to shovel food in my mouth. I had gone long enough not talking to her. I knew she would be pissed at me and it made my stomach churn at the idea. I hated when people were upset with me, but Audrey... I just couldn’t let it go any longer.

  I picked up the phone receiver next to the bed and dialed Audrey’s number that I had memorized by heart long ago. She wouldn’t recognize the number, but I hoped she would still answer.

  After three rings, I heard Jace’s brusque voice ask, “Hello?”

  “Quit being so damn overprotective and hand her the phone,” I laughed.

  “You wouldn’t want me to be any other way.” He had a point. I could sleep easier when I left knowing Jace would protect Audrey better than I could. But that was only because he slept with her. “You may not want me to hand the phone over to her right now...” he warned with humor in his voice.

  “Who is that, Jace?” I heard Audrey’s familiar voice call. Jace didn’t answer so I knew he had to have been giving her a telling look. “Give me that phone right now,” she practically growled.

  Yeah, I had some explaining to do and she wasn’t going to let me off easy.

  “What would you have done if I refused to answer your calls or texts for days?” she bit into the line.

  “Doll, I need to tell you something very important right now,” I soothed.

  “What would you have done, Lane!?”

  I sighed heavily, knowing what she was doing. “I would have tracked you down and counseled you on the danger of being out of touch. I would have been out of my mind with worry.”

  “Don’t you ever do that to me again. And no, I don’t care that you sent Jace a text. I needed to hear from you.”

  “Doll, I need to tell you why I always disappear.” My words sobered her rampage and she fell silent. “First, I want to tell you I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the past couple of days, and I’m even more sorry for not telling you where I’ve been going for the past couple of years.”

  “Are you a drug dealer?” she whispered.

  “What?! No. God, Audrey. That’s what you thought?” In the background, I heard Jace hoot with laughter.

  “Lane Parker…” Shit, I didn’t like it when she took that tone. “Does Jace know where you go?” Well, that halted Jace’s cackling in a hurry. Good, he was in trouble now too.

  “Yes.”

  “Tell me,” she growled.

  “I have a daughter.”

  “What!?” she shouted. “How in the hell? You have a daughter that you’ve only gone to see a handful of times a year? Lane, I will kill you.”

  “Audrey, when she was only a baby she was kidnapped from my apartment in New York.”

  “Oh my God…” I heard her gasp.

  “That was over four years ago,” I added.

  “You’ve been looking for her, haven’t you?”

  “Yeah, that’s why I moved to California in the first place.”

  Her words were mixed with tears and my gut churned. “Let me guess, her name is Kate?”

  “Yeah…” I mumbled, knowing that I had once told her my tattoo was a lost love I never wanted to talk about. Which had not been a lie, technically.

  “Lane, why?”

  “I know you, doll. I know you would have worried just as much as I did every day. That kind of thing eats away at a person. You had enough on your plate already.”

  “I still would have wanted—”

  I jumped to interrupt. “I know and I love that about you, but it wasn’t your burden to bear.”

  “So, why now? Why are you telling me now?”

  “I found her.”

  “WHAT!?” Then the floodgates were entirely blown away and she was full-on sobbing into the phone. Thankfully, I could hear Jace trying to console her but I wished I could hug her. I knew I didn’t have much more time on the phone with her before Raegan would be done in the bathroom so I attempted to console my best friend from fifteen hundred miles away, reassuring her that everything was okay now.

  - SEVEN -

  RAEGAN -

  It felt incredible to actually be clean. Not the hospital shower with their sterile-smelling soaps kind of clean, but the really and truly fresh kind. And blow-drying my hair! I haven’t done that in years, and I couldn’t believe how light and beautiful it felt. I almost felt spoiled, and then I laughed at myself in the mirror with how ridiculous that sounded.

  When I entered the room, Braden and Kate were sitting with their legs crossed at the little dining table. I smiled when I saw how happy they were with their food. We were never given bad food, but it was portioned and all extremely health-conscious. I can’t say that I hated the idea of them growing up eating only lean meats and tons of vegetables and fruits, but they never got the opportunity to splurge—ever.

  “Mama, Lane said this is a pancake! I think it’s my favoritest,” Braden said with his mouth full.

  “Your most favorite,” I corrected with a smile.

  “Mama, look at this! Have you ever had one?” Kate asked enthusiastically.

  I laughed, “Yes, it’s called a donut. Did Lane only order sugar?”

  “No, we ate eggs, bacon, and bananas already,” Braden informed me.

  “You guys are going to get sick, if you don’t slow it down.” I pointed seriously at them and then gave a little smile before making my way to see where Lane had gone off to.

  “So, you don’t hate me, doll?” I heard Lane’s deep ask. I halted in my steps, first wondering why I would hate him and second, why he called me doll.

  “I don’t know if I’ll be able to call every day, but I’ll do my best,” he continued. I then realized he was on the phone and since his back was facing me, I slipped out before he even knew I had been there. But before I was out of earshot, I heard, “Love you too, doll. Give the baby a kiss for me.”

  I heard the phone click back in the receiver and Lane began walking around the room. I didn’t know what to think about that conversation. Did Lane have another family? I mean, when he basically implied he had been with another girl recently, I took it as a fling. Now I realized that may have been presumptuous of me. I guess it had felt like he was flirting with me and usually guys in relationships didn’t do that. I could have been wrong.

  I had obviously been out of the game way too long. Hell, even before I was with Braden’s dad, I was probably never really ‘in the game.’ Question was did I even care if he were with someone else or not? I wanted to say no.

  Maybe this was just me worrying about how the situation would affect Kate. When I saw Lane and Kate together, I had really hoped that they would be able to spend plenty of one-on-one time together so they could properly bond. It might be harder for Kate to adjust to another baby or a... stepmom. I hated that idea instantly.

  With my spine stiffened, I walked back into the room and joined Lane. He was now seated at the table, trying to work a fork with his left hand. He was obviously right-handed, but that hand was currently secured in a sling against his body.

  “This sucks,” he grumbled while practically glaring at his left hand, willing it to do as he demanded.

  I sat down across from him and frowned, not knowing exactly how I should approach the matter. I was never the type to silently hold my problems inside. Why let something fester when you could just get it off your chest? He looked up at me and immediately realized my mood.

  “I... I...” he stuttered. “I’m sorry?” he asked with complete confusion in his tone. I wanted to laugh at his ridiculous deer-in-the-headlights look. Typical male, jumping to
an apology that he obviously had no idea what it was for.

  “So, how is this going to work? I don’t know why I didn’t think about it before, but I just don’t know how well Kate will adjust. She needs you. Just you. Not a step-mom or a baby. I know that sounds awfully selfish, but I know her... and I know she’s going to need time. Too many people all at once—”

  “Whoa, hold on,” he interrupted my ramblings, which were quickly becoming incoherent. I was thankful for his disruption because I didn’t know what else I could add to prove my point. “I’m confused...what... what the hell are we talking about here? Stepmom? Baby? You lost me.”

  “Oh, are you going to ask Kate to call her ‘mom’?” I shrank back in my seat with that last word. I was mom.

  “What is going on?!” he whisper-shouted, leaning toward me over the table.

  I pointed across the room toward the phone. “The girl... that person you were talking to. Doll?” I cringed. “Sorry, I overheard.” I wrung my hands together under the table and felt guilty for eavesdropping.

  “Ohhh,” he laughed. “Audrey is not my wife or girlfriend or anything like that, and her baby is definitely not mine. More like a niece.”

  “So, Audrey is your sister?” I asked, feeling a bit of relief. For Kate, of course.

  “By blood, no. By what matters, yes.”

  “But you call her doll?”

  “It’s a nickname.” He shrugged and sat back in his seat.

  “It’s a pet name,” I informed him.

  “Yeah, Jace says the same thing.” When I opened up my mouth to ask who Jace was, he answered my silent question. “Jace is her husband.”

  “She has a husband and he lets you call his wife doll?” My mouth must have been wide in shock.

  “She was mine first!” he responded defensively.

  I raised an eyebrow at him. “Right... and you don’t see how that would make people question it?”

  “Outside of Jace, it’s never really been a problem. Look, I met Audrey right after I fled to San Diego to look for Kate. She was just this sad little helpless girl who also happened to be the strongest damn person I had ever met, but she just needed someone to tell her and show her. I, on the other hand, was in so much pain that I couldn’t even remember how to breathe. We helped each other. She’s my best friend.”