Fragile Love

by Mack Black

  Bella’s shoulders shook as tears fell from her eyes.

  "Why are you crying? Isn't this what you wanted?" I asked.

  "I didn't realize how much I wanted it to be positive until now. It's crazy. I'm crazy. We don't need a baby right now, not with everything being so new, but for some reason I don’t feel relief, only sadness.”

  I knew exactly what she was feeling. "If this is what you want, we can try again. I mean, I was freaked out at first, but I'm kind of sad too. I liked the idea of being a father."

  "No James. This has to be something you truly want. You can't enter into something like this without thinking it through." She almost seemed mad and I didn't understand why. I did want this too. Maybe I didn't realize it before, but I did.

  "Bella, I'm not just saying I'll do what you want. I want what you want. I want anything that makes you happy.

  Besides, I was looking forward to teaching our son how to fish, or our daughter all about superheroes and villains. One day it will happen for us. Today just isn't that day. We have plenty of time to try again and again until you get pregnant."

  She dropped the test into the trash can and went to the kitchen. I followed behind her, grabbing plates and silverware to set the table.

  "I don't want to try again. We didn't even try the first time James. I don't…" she trailed off, wiping at her face.

  Then she turned her back to me, flipping the kitchen faucet on. "I don't know what I want."

  I had no clue how to respond, so instead of using words, I used my arms and wrapped her back in them. She cried until the oven beeped, then like nothing had happened, she wiped her cheeks and took dinner from the oven.

  "Tell me what I can do," I said, my tone whisper-soft as I sat at the table across from her.

  "Nothing. I will be okay."

  Two days after the negative reveal and Bella was still heartbroken. I just wanted to make everything better again. I just wanted to see her smile again.

  I would give anything to see her smile again.

  So, on my way home from work, I stopped by the store and grabbed the biggest box of chocolate I could find, a dozen roses, and a copy of When Harry Met Sally.

  When I walked through the apartment door, she wasn't even home. I put the roses in a vase with some water and left them on her nightstand, then laid the box of chocolate on her pillow with the movie and stripped out of my clothes for a shower.

  Stepping under the warm stream of water, I sighed. It was just what I needed to relieve all the stress of the day, and if tomorrow was any indication, it wouldn't be the last of my stress since I was scheduled to meet with Joanne Seeley, reporter at Dateline, at eleven am to give my interview. Then we could move on and count down the days until Charlotte was executed.

  I’d already seen Charlotte’s interview, a live feature that aired a few days ago. While it gave me a peek inside her head as to why she was so sick, it also offered me a little closure, but it wasn't enough to finish that chapter of my life. Once I watched her execution, I could finally move on, and only then would the pain and heartache end.

  Pushing aside my distractions, I soaped up and stood under the pelting water, letting it beat down on my face as I closed my eyes. After a deep breath, I reached for my shampoo to find Bella climbing in the shower. My hands found her waist as I helped her inside, only to press her body against my own.

  "Thank you for the surprise on my pillow," she whispered against my cheek.

  "I want to see you smile again," I answered.

  "I'm okay James. I just don't do well with disappointment. I'm over it." She turned, pressing her back into my front and lathering herself with my body wash.

  "When it's our time, it will happen. No one can take that from us. I do miss your smile though," I said in her ear.

  Her face brightened, and I felt my own lighting up. Her smile was contagious, breathtaking, and everything I ever wanted.

  "You gonna be okay for tomorrow?" she asked, stepping forward into the stream of water to rinse off.

  "As long as you’re with me."

  "I wouldn't miss it for anything in the world. I will be with you every step of the way. It's us against the world," she said.

  I jumped out of the shower and the cold air from the hallway had goosebumps dancing down my arms. "We better get to sleep then. I'm ready to put this all behind me."

  Bella followed me into the bedroom and shrugged my shirt over her head. I threw some sleep shorts on, and we both crawled into bed. When she cuddled against me, I kissed her forehead and turned the light out. The last words I whispered before I fell asleep were, “I love you.”

  I searched the small crowd inside the station. Bella sat in the front row between my dad and sister, which gave me a little comfort. Despite my initial rejections, I had to give this interview. The lights came up and the director counted down.

  "Hello and welcome back to Dateline’s special: Charlotte's Deadly Devotion. I'm Joanne Seeley and today we are here with James Winters, ex step son of Charlotte Keller-Winters. How are you doing today James?" Joanne asked.

  "I am doing pretty good Joanne, how about you?" I replied.

  "I am doing well, thanks for asking. Thank you so much for agreeing to come on the show and tell the public your experience. I understand Charlotte didn't really terrorize you like she did Vanessa, but we want to hear all about what you thought of her and what you saw." Her movements were loud, her clothing almost sounding like it creaked when she shifted, and it distracted me.

  "Charlotte was a real piece of work. I'm honestly glad she left me alone because it gave me more time to observe things."

  More time to see the true evil that was buried inside her.

  "What did you think of Charlotte when your dad brought her home to meet you?” she asked, turning back to the in-house crowd at the exact right moment, upping the dramatic effect.

  “I could see right through her. I knew the second I laid eyes on her she was a con artist."

  I shifted in my seat, clearing my insanely dry throat. Did they have water here?

  "How did you know?" Her posture stiffened as she jerked her hands in front of her. I had no idea if she was surprised, of if she was trying to increase the drama again.

  "It's easy if you watch the way people carry themselves. I'm a quiet one, which means I sit back and watch people. It makes me good at reading them, and the way she spoke produced an air of fakeness. Also, she never looked at my dad like a woman in love. She watched him like a woman with an agenda."

  I glanced back into the crowd, making sure Bella was still there. My stomach flip flopped, my breakfast swishing around inside. It made me nauseous.

  "Why didn't you try to warn your dad?"

  I ask myself the same thing every single day.

  "There’s one thing you should know about my dad. You should never tell him what to do. He’ll just do the opposite. He’s the type of guy who has to see things for himself to believe them.” I locked eyes with Dad, shooting him an apologetic glance.

  "Makes sense, but you let their marriage go on for over a year. During that year, did you see things?" Joanne’s eyes narrowed, and I thought maybe she blamed me for never saying anything.

  Could saying something to dad have possibly changed the course of events? Is it my fault?

  "Before Jace came, I thought maybe I’d been wrong. I hadn't seen her try to con Dad. She never tried to access his money, and she went to work every day…at least we thought she did. She’d also been nice to me, so I just ignored her most of the time. Especially when I realized how she looked at and talked to Nessa.” I blinked and rubbed the back of my neck. I wanted nothing more than to get up and run out of there, away from her questions and away from her making me feel like everything that happened was my fault since I hadn’t warned Dad.

  "How did she talk to Vanessa?" Joanne asked.

  "Like she was dirt underneath her feet."

  "I see, and did your dad ever notice this?" Her lips pressed flat,
forehead wrinkled, and she stared me down, almost as if evaluating every single move I made. It took me off guard for several seconds.

  I cleared my throat and gritted my teeth to keep from getting too defensive. "Of course not, she was on her best behavior when Dad was around."

  "So, tell me what your thoughts were when Jace came to live with you?"

  "I thought he was going to be a jerk. He carried himself like a boy who had everything and despite knowing he had a hard life, he still came across that way. It made me worry about Vanessa because I didn't want her to get hurt.”

  "What do you mean?" Joanne was really starting to get on my last nerve.

  "I don't know how to explain it. I guess since I'm a guy, I can always tell when another guy is trying to conquer a girl. He looked at her like she was something to be eaten, like a predator stalking prey."

  "Were you worried for long?" she asked.

  "Well we had this dinner that first night, and I pretended not to pay attention, but I was watching him. He couldn't keep his hands off her. The strange part was, she didn't seem to mind, which told me she knew what she was getting into, so I left it at that. Our dad had already told us part of his story.

  Granted, most of it consisted of lies that Charlotte concocted."

  Boy was she good at that.

  "What did he tell you?" The reporter grasped the edge of her chair, hanging on to every word I said. I bet the audience was doing the exact same.

  "She told us he was taken from her because of a faulty court ruling so he lived with his aunt.” Rage bubbled inside me, always there, under the surface.

  "When did you realize they were actually together?"

  "I had my suspicions for a while, but I guess I realized it was true when I came home one day and heard them in Nessa’s room. It was probably about a year and three months after he came to live with us." I could still picture that day, both of them going at it like jack rabbits. The moans were so loud I’m surprised the neighbors didn’t hear.

  "That must have been awkward for you," she said, the hint of a smile playing across her lips.

  "Nah. I could see the changes in her. He made her happy, so I was okay with it. It wasn't like they were actually brother and sister like we were. There was no blood relation."

  "I understand you helped Vanessa get him back after a big fight between them."

  Who the hell told this woman all this information?

  "It would’ve happened with or without me. Neither of them was ready to give up, so I gave her a little push in the right direction," I answered, shooting a glance to my sister.

  "That's real sweet of you. Especially since you and your sister didn't always get along well."

  "Yeah that was completely my fault. I blamed her for something she had nothing to do with. In the end, we worked it out." The words choked me as I let them out.

  "So why did you start recording Charlotte’s phone calls?" The reporter released a small breath, almost inaudible, but sitting so close to her, I’d heard it. I just didn’t know what to make of it.

  "I noticed her acting real shady and I knew I had to keep a close watch. Since I had school and couldn't follow her around all day, I did the next best thing. I tapped the phone."

  "And it was then you discovered she actually wanted your sister dead?" Where had she gotten so much information? It wasn’t like the news crews knew some of these details. This woman could practically write a tell all book with everything she knew.

  "Yes. The woman tried to call and order a hit. I never thought she’d attempt something like that, especially from a landline."

  "Were you going to tell your dad what you found?"

  "I didn’t hear the tapes until they did, until the police showed up for another issue entirely.”

  "Were you afraid for Vanessa?"

  I was more than afraid since Charlotte had committed murder.

  "Nessa can hold her own. She did beat death, after all.” I turned my eyes to my sister and a warm feeling spread through my chest. She was a hell of a fighter.

  "Tell me what went through your head when Vanessa was stabbed that day in court?"

  A lump formed in my throat. I clenched my fists together, needing to feel the pain to talk about this. I hated thinking of this day, much less talking about it. My eyes went to the crowd and found Bella. When she winked and nodded, relief flooded my chest. I wasn’t sure how she did it, but she had a calming effect on me, just from a mere look.

  "I was terrified I’d lost her and angry at myself for not trying harder, for not making things right with her sooner.

  Hell, I’d just gotten over my issues and hadn’t even had time to be a brother." My eyes watered, so I wiped at the corners to keep the tears at bay. The last thing I wanted to do was cry on national television.

  "Was there ever a time when you didn't think she would wake up?"

  I swallowed, clearing my throat to try to make the words come out. "Every day, I lost a little more hope, but Jace wouldn’t let us go down that road. He always said she’d come back, and she did…Let’s just say I’ve never felt more relief.”

  "Since then, how has your relationship been with your sister?" Joanne asked.

  Damn she is getting personal as hell.

  "Nessa is my best friend. And so is her husband. We’re close.”

  "Are you glad Charlotte is being executed in two more days?"

  "It will be good to finally be able to move on. For a long time, we imagined her getting out of jail and coming after all of us. That worry will be gone after this.”

  But the scars will stick around much longer.

  "Do you plan to be present?"

  "We will all be present. I guess it's our way of knowing it's over."

  "How does your girlfriend feel knowing you are sort of famous because of this?"

  Famous? Ha!

  "If anyone is famous, it's my sister, Jace, and Charlotte of course. I was just in the background. My girlfriend knows everything and despite it, she still hangs around." I laughed at the absurdity of that question. I watched as the cameras panned to Bella, and she gave a little wave.

  "I am relieved you guys found some happiness. Most people don’t ever move past this type of trauma.”

  I flashed a grin. "We aren't most people."

  "Definitely not. Before I close is there anything else you’d like to add?" Joanne made wide hand gestures, and I started to wonder if she was signaling the cameraman instead of deliberately trying to up the drama effect.

  "No, I think you covered everything I had to say."

  "Thanks again for coming on the show. I'm Joanne Seeley, reporting live. Tune in tomorrow for the end of this special edition of Dateline."

  The lights came down and the director yelled, “Cut.” Just like that it ended.

  "You did great James. Thanks for coming in." Joanne offered her hand, which I shook before I walked off stage. As soon as I could, I pulled Bella into my arms and kissed her forehead.

  "What a crock of shit you tell," Vanessa said, laughing as she punched me in the shoulder.

  "Yeah, well, we all lie a little," I said. "You lied a little too."

  Bella kissed me, and for a single moment, I allowed myself to get carried away. "You're both too sappy for me. Eww," Nessa said as she moved towards Jace.

  "I said the same about you and lover boy," I called out to her.

  "Deal with it."

  She gave me the finger before kissing Jace on the lips.

  "Sometimes I hate her," I said.

  "No, you don't."

  "Please just let me have that." I laughed, knowing Bella was right and I didn't hate my sister. Not anymore anyways.

  "Nope."

  I rolled my eyes at her and grasped her hand.

  " My stomach is growling," Bella said.

  I let her pull me through the hallways of the station, following behind my sister and Jace, who were swinging their joined hands in the air like two teenagers in love. The fact they could still
act like that made my heart smile.

  "Wait up," I called out.

  They stopped walking but didn't bother to turn around.

  "Wanna grab some food? I’m starving," Bella said as we reached them.

  "We’d love to," Jace said. "We were actually just talking about food."

  "You're always talking about food, Jace," I teased.

  "Shut up, James. If I remember correctly, you used to eat us out of house and home," he countered.

  "Depression does that to you," I argued.

  "Well, I'm glad you're finally happy bro." He patted me on the back like it was some big accomplishment.

  "Happy does look good on James, doesn't it?" Bella said, kissing my cheek. "Not that you didn't look good before," she added when I frowned.

  "Don't go getting a big ego now," Jace said.

  "Don't worry, you've got enough for the both of us," I taunted.

  "Where did Dad go? He rushed off so fast I didn’t even get to say a word to him.”

  Nessa shrugged in answer, but Bella and Jace shared a curious look, making me think they knew something.

  "He had something to tend to at home" Jace said, and I had a feeling he’d said that to get us off the topic.

  Jace knew something, and Bella must be in on it. I hated secrets, but I knew if Bella was keeping something from me, she had her reasons and I respected her enough to let it alone. It had taken a while to get there, but I trusted her now.

  Secrets had a way of coming out in the end, anyways. I just had to be patient.

  Today marked the beginning of a new chapter in all our lives, and the closing of the old chapter.

  While I felt sorry for Jace since he was losing the last remaining person in his family, he also had a new family to lean on in times of need. My family. I couldn’t pretend her execution didn’t make me happy, but I could acknowledge the pain that must be inside of him.

  Charlotte had requested to see him before her death, but Jace refused. He didn't want to give her the satisfaction or have her thinking she’d won. She hadn’t.