Heart of Gold (Firecats Book 1)

by P. Jameson

  He’d been missing a piece of himself for so long. But the beast didn’t make him whole. Marlee had.

  Look for me in the stars.

  Feeling lost and wanting to remember, he ducked out his window and climbed the ladder to the roof, doubling back for his beer.

  In the open air of the rooftop, he paced out his sadness, her note hanging limply from his fingers, the bottle of beer staying mostly at his lips.

  He didn’t bother with the tears now. He just wanted to focus on being here where they watched the stars so many nights. Where he touched her for the first time. He could still remember the fluttering in his chest when she pressed her little pinky to his, waiting to see what he’d do. He’d taken a chance. It felt like the biggest fucking risk at the time. But he’d curled his finger around hers.

  And she didn’t pull away.

  And he knew he was lost to her right then. Completely fucking lost.

  “Shit.” The curse left his mouth sounding soaked. And he still didn’t care. “Shit, shit.”

  He downed the rest of his beer and flung the bottle at the door of the utility room where it crashed against the metal, splintering into a million pieces.

  A high-pitched yelp from behind the door had him going ramrod stiff.

  “Marlee?”

  He crossed the roof to the utility room, yanking open the door and damn near pulling it off the hinges.

  Damn it. He’d have to be careful with this strength.

  Another surprised gasp caught his attention as the light from outside flooded into the room. He found her standing in the middle of the small space, flashlight in hand, blinking against the brightness.

  “Marlee,” he breathed.

  “Ratchet,” she cried, and rushed him, dropping her flashlight as her arms came around his waist and her face burrowed into his bare chest.

  Shaking all to hell, he cradled her head, swallowing over and over to keep his emotion behind his fucking throat.

  “I’m staying,” she said. “You have the cat now… whatever the hell it is… so I’m staying. Me and little firekitten. Don’t even try to stop me, Ratchet, because I’m staying. I’m staying, okay. There’s nowhere else I should be. I’m stayi—”

  He brought her face up, forgetting to be gentle, because she was here, and all he wanted to do was taste her again. Get her under his body so he could claim her the right way. Fuck away all the shit they’d been through tonight. Get her back in his bed where he could hold her while they slept.

  He pressed his lips to hers, tasting their tears as his tongue plowed inside, desperately needing to claim every inch of her mouth.

  She clung to him, her short nails scraping into the skin of his back as she hungrily met his tongue thrust for thrust.

  He broke away, holding her face close. Didn’t want any space between them.

  “Been looking everywhere for you, lamb.” As he whispered, his lips brushed hers.

  “I was right here,” she whispered back.

  “Were you scared? Of me?”

  “No,” she said, shaking her head where his was pressed to hers. “Surprised. Confused. Still am a little. But you turned back into… you. And I trust you. Ratchet, I trust you.”

  He heard what she was saying. Heard it deep in his heart. In their bond. In the part of him she controlled, and always would.

  But she whispered it anyway. “I love you.”

  Aw, shit. That was all he needed to hear. All the pieces of his broken heart were locking back into place like a fucking miracle.

  His beast rumbled his chest in approval.

  He crushed his lips to hers hard enough to bruise.

  Shit, careful.

  But she kissed him back, and her fingers tangled in his hair pulling hard enough to bring his cock roaring to life. Desperate Marlee was a new thing, and he liked her like this.

  He cut the kiss short, hooking her pinky and dragging her out of the utility room.

  “Wait. Where are we going?”

  “To bed.”

  “The duffle,” she said, but they were already halfway across the roof.

  “Leave it. I need inside you,” he growled.

  “Okay. Okay good. Yeah.”

  He skipped most of the steps on the ladder, jumping to the bottom instead and waiting for her to make her way down.

  “Careful, lamb.”

  When she was two steps from the bottom, he was done waiting. He lifted her off the ladder and carried her to his window, setting her safely inside before climbing through himself.

  “I’ll try not to scare you,” he murmured, stalking toward her where she stood just beside the bed. “Try my best. But I thought I lost you, lamb.”

  “You can’t scare me.” Her breath churned, making her small breasts heave. “Not like this. Not with you. You’re my safe place. My protector. My warrior.”

  Mmmm. Yessss. He was that.

  “Take off your shirt,” he rasped. Because he couldn’t. If he got any closer, he was going to rip it off. Tear it to shreds with his claws.

  Marlee peeled it over her head, letting it land on the floor.

  “Now your bra.” That sexy scrap of lacy fabric she’d ordered online… it made him hard as steel, but it had to go. He wanted her bare to him for what was coming.

  She shrugged it off, leaving just her perfect tits with their hard pink tips and her jeans.

  “The rest,” he croaked, and she hurried to get her pants down, kicking them away. He freed himself of his too, and then there was nothing else between them except air.

  Ratchet breathed deep, scenting his mate’s arousal. It brought a purr from his beast, and Marlee’s eyes flared when she heard it.

  “Your animal.” She didn’t cower. She only seemed… curious.

  “The beast won’t hurt you. He’s safe. Not like my old animal. Not like the Alley Cat I was born with. This one’s part of me and he only exists because of you.”

  “I’m not scared.”

  “Good.” Ratchet stepped closer. He was going to take her down to the bed in the next breath or two. “Because he wants to claim you for his mate. Wants to make you mine. It means forever.”

  “He does. Or you do?”

  “Both.”

  “Good.”

  And his control snapped.

  He lunged for his mate, taking her to the bed and breaking her fall with his arms.

  “Oh, lamb,” he rasped against her throat. “I’m going to eat. You. Up.”

  ***

  Marlee moaned at the feel of Ratchet’s hard body pressing her into the mattress. His lips were doing wicked things to her neck. His hands were trying to touch every part of her at once.

  Wild.

  He was always careful with her. Soft touches. And she loved those. Did she ever. They’d brought her back from the ugliest time of her life and made her feel human again. Made her feel special and cared for.

  Those soft touches coming from a hard man had saved her life.

  But he wasn’t careful now. He was wild. He was showing her the rest of him.

  And she loved this side even more.

  She could make him lose control, she realized. She could make her powerful man lose all control, and for once, she… she didn’t want him to be careful. She wanted him to be raw and feral. An animal.

  She should probably want answers to all of her firecat questions. But all she could think about was being one with him again. Connecting in that way that she felt deep in her middle. Like they breathed the same air, pumped the same blood.

  Questions could come later. And she had a lot for him.

  Right now, she wanted to make him lose all sense. Lose control. Wanted him as out of his mind as she was.

  So she bit him.

  Just a small bite. On the chord of muscle above his shoulder. It was a sexy spot. Teeth seemed like a good idea.

  Call it instinct, call it risky. Either way, it resulted in the desired effect.

  Ratchet went still, his chest pumping w
ith that sexy purr. He found her gaze, staring at her with those flaming blue eyes, tinged orange with the evidence of his cat.

  “Did you just bite me, lamb.” He stared through the hair that hung in his face, the familiar snarl she loved twisting his lips.

  She nodded, pressing her lips together to keep from moaning at the way he looked at her.

  He dove for her mouth, prying open her lips with his tongue and then leisurely sucking the lower one into his mouth and letting it pop free before nibbling his way back down her neck.

  His needy hand probed lower and lower until he cupped her sex. Her legs fell open for him this time, knowing he was never going to go too far. Never going to hurt her. Only make her squirm. Only make her float high.

  He rubbed her with the heel of his hand, his finger dipping in to test her wetness. But she was ready. So close to release and he wasn’t even in her yet.

  He must have come to the same conclusion, because he lined up at her entrance, pressing in with one smooth stroke.

  Marlee gasped at the sensation. The drag of his body pushing into hers was something she would never get enough of.

  He went still when he was buried deep, panting with restraint.

  “I want to take you hard. Make you feel me hard. But I won’t, lamb. I’ll be careful with you. Always.”

  His eyes went soft with his promise, and she melted beneath him. Always thinking of her. Always giving more than he got.

  True love. The purest love.

  She vowed to love him back the very same way.

  Ratchet pulled back and plunged forward, pushing into her easy, determined to keep his promise. He moved again, watching her face while he made love to her.

  “Harder,” she groaned. “Like you want to. Do it. I want it.”

  But instead, he slowed, staring hard at her. Brow furrowed tight, eyes blazing, he warned, “You don’t know what you’re saying.”

  “Yes, I do. I want you wild. Do what you said you’d do. Make me yours.”

  He didn’t move. He only stared, mouth open to resist.

  But she wasn’t letting him.

  She leaned up, nipping his jaw with her teeth and earning a low snarl. He pulled back and this time plunged forward hard enough to rock her entire body and the bed with it.

  She cried out in pleasure, groaning for more.

  “Hard, lamb?” His voice was deceptively soft. The opposite of his body. “You want me to take you hard.”

  Another body shaking thrust, and another.

  “On one condition…” He sucked in a sharp breath when she clenched around him, just a breath away from a mind-shattering orgasm.

  “Anything,” she squealed, as he bottomed out again, vibrating her teeth.

  “You promise me forever. I want it, lamb.”

  Thrust.

  “You.”

  Thrust.

  “Me.”

  Thrust.

  “And firekitten. Say yes.”

  Forever with a man who put her first? Who cared about her safety, her future, her wants and needs. Who was strong enough to battle all her demons. The ones in her mind and the ones in life.

  That was the easiest yes of her existence.

  “Yes.”

  With her whispered vow, the hold on his restraint snapped, and Ratchet became a snarling, lust-crazed beast, driving into her, over and over. He pushed her up the bed with each thrust, spread her legs wider to get deeper. His hair hung over his sweat slicked face, and his eyes never left hers as he pistoned into her.

  She could have come from his look alone. The pure ownership there. The way his eyes screamed you’re mine.

  But it was the feel of his hand on her hip that sent her over the edge. The way he gripped her as he pounded her. Soft. The soft touch in the storm of lust. It reminded her he could always be soft for her. He could be hard for her. He could be whatever she needed.

  She screamed as pleasure rattled her from head to toe, making her jerk and spasm around Ratchet.

  He threw his head back roaring his approval and filling her with his hot release.

  A sharp pain at her hip was barely a blip on her radar as her body went into another fit, writhing and clamping and gasping, like she was possessed. But she had no shame. It felt too good, and there was something else.

  The bond. The feeling in her middle that made her want to cling to him. Something was happening to it.

  It was growing stronger. Becoming solid. It felt… unbreakable.

  Ratchet gave one last hard push into her body and then collapsed on top of her, breathing hard.

  She clamped her mouth shut when she realized she was making whale noises. Or goat grunts. It was something hideous anyway. What the hell?

  But he’d just broken her with sex. Broken her in the best way, and put her back together.

  He was good at that. Taking things that were trashed and making treasures out of them.

  Ratchet pulled up, angling his face toward her hip. Cold air hit her and she felt something wet. Somehow she lifted her head to find him blowing on her skin. A tiny trail of blood trickled from a jagged claw mark and he dabbed at it with the sheet.

  She frowned. “What is it?”

  It didn’t hurt. Did he get a little too wild? Because she wasn’t holding it against him—

  “I marked you,” he said quietly. “A mating mark. To let the world know. You’re marked with my scent too.”

  “I am?”

  He nodded, glancing at her and looking so satisfied she wanted to kiss the look off his face.

  “Humans won’t notice, but other shifters will, and they won’t dare touch you.”

  “Shifter. Is that what you are? What firekitten will be?”

  He nodded, rolling to the side and pulling her into his arms.

  “I was a werecat. We all were. Skittles, Monster, Fang… Felix. The others.”

  “Your mom?”

  He stiffened. “No, she’s human. I got the cat from my father.”

  “Oh.” She nuzzled his chest so he’d keep going.

  “But we did a bad thing and made the wrong people angry. We threatened innocents.” He swallowed hard. “Not fucking proud of it, lamb. But it’s how the story goes. To stop us, a coven of witches called Sorcera put a curse on us that crippled our animals. Locked them inside our bodies where they faded away to nothing. The only way to break the curse is to have a change of heart.”

  “Fall in love,” she whispered.

  Ratchet nodded. “But more than that. I loved you, and still couldn’t pull the firecat free. It took something more. It took sacrifice. A selfless action. Something pure enough to burn it all away. All the dark past and shit.”

  “Setting me free,” she realized. “To keep me and firekitten safe, you let us go.”

  And the curse was broken.

  He squeezed her close, dropping kisses to her hair.

  “It’s over now. We’re both fixed, you and me,” he murmured. “Things won’t always be easy for us, lamb. But I won’t ever let you face shit alone. I swear it.”

  Across the sheet, she found his pinky. She curled hers around it in a silent promise to always meet him in the darkness, even if it scared the hell out of her.

  “What now?” she asked.

  Ratchet squeezed her finger. “I like when you ask me that.”

  She shivered and he pulled the sheet over them, making sure she was covered to her chin.

  “Now we make a plan to get the dolls free. We hope like hell some of these fuckers can do what it takes to break the curse. And then…” His voice went dark. “…we take Bastian down. And make Memphis a shit-bit safer.”

  It sounded like a good plan. Perfect even. Except for one thing.

  “And live happily ever after?”

  Ratchet smirked. “And maybe some of that, lamb.”

  He brought her pinky to his lips and kissed the promise there before doing it again on her mouth.

  And she knew they’d be all right. All of them. The cl
an. The dolls. The future.

  Because she had a man who was good at making people safe.

  And he could breathe fire. So.

  Epilogue

  Three weeks later…

  Monster waited on the landing of Bastian Marx’s fancypants billion-dollar home. The thing looked like it was paid for with deceit and trickery and smelled like the tears of the defeated.

  Or maybe that was just because he knew what was inside.

  Four girls that didn’t deserve to be locked in a cold fucking basement while they paid off whatever debt they or somebody else owed.

  But he hadn’t had to fight to get past the security at the front gate. No, he’d walked right through because they were expecting him. And as the door opened, he was greeted by a smiling maid in a black and white dress. Creepy as fuck. It was like a movie he’d seen recently.

  “You must be here for the security position, yes?”

  Monster nodded and the female smiled pleasantly, even though she was having a hard time looking at his scars. He couldn’t blame her. They were ugly ass things. And right there on his face. Like a billboard announcing he was ugly inside too.

  But not for long, the voice inside whispered. That new amazing voice that gave him fucking hope. Find her, and she will help you.

  But he was here for a slow gig. To gain entry to Bastian’s home. Gain his trust. Get close to the dolls, so he and the other Alley Cats could get them free.

  The female led him through a maze of hallways to a set of double doors. He logged the path in his mind as she knocked and announced him.

  Shit, Bastian liked life fancy, didn’t he?

  Maybe this was good news. Maybe his girl wasn’t living in such bad conditions as his mind had imagined. Marlee had told him of a basement. Said it was dark and cold. Just cement and a few beds that had to be shared. And never enough blankets.

  Monster swallowed hard.

  He hated the idea of his girl being cold.

  Shivering on the floor. Huddled in for warmth she wouldn’t find. He pictured her, the way she was in the photo, and he couldn’t imagine her any other way but cold.

  Find her, and take her. Come back later for the others.

  But Monster knew it would only get the dolls hurt. If he even made it out of the mansion with his. It would put their entire plan in jeopardy, and he’d promised Marlee he wouldn’t risk any of the girls.