Falling Into Us

by Selene Chardou

  “That’s easy…but mine is a threesome fantasy. When I jerk off, I always imagine I am in bed with Rihanna and Taylor Swift. The sexy pop temptress and the innocent-looking country sensation. I think that would be a great sandwich.”

  “Oh. My. God. You are kidding, right?”

  “Not really. It isn’t like I haven’t had my fair share of pop stars. I had a hot and heavy affair with pop princess, Chyna Bleu. That wasn’t just smokin’ hot, it was ecstasy. We had great bedroom chemistry. Hell, it was so good…I can still dream about her. She’s a firecracker in bed. I plan to turn you into my own personal Chyna Bleu and you will learn how to fuck like that chick can because then you’ll truly have me hook, line and sinker,” Kaz explained casually.

  I don’t know why and I felt so petty but I was jealous about all these different sexual experiences he’d had. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t want anyone else but it would have been nice to have at least known what one other guy’s dick felt like inside me before I decided to get so serious with Kaz.

  His hand slipped down and squeezed my right breast before he began to kiss my neck.

  “Babe,” I began softly, “how do you feel about threesomes?”

  “What do you mean?” he questioned back. “With another woman or a guy.”

  I pulled away from him and crossed my arms against my breasts. “Jeez, homophobic much?”

  Kaz laughed out loud. “Me? A homophobe? Baby, I have participated in threesomes, foursomes and moresomes. I have had a guy suck my cock and I have had anal sex. I don’t know where you get that just because I’m an alpha male, that must mean I’m some kind of bigoted red neck who has something against certain people in the world because babe, that isn’t me. I don’t believe in labels or any of that shit. When it comes to sex, it’s all about what feels good to me and I will try anything once. I’m crazy like that…well, except brown showers…I draw the line at bukkake and golden showers…and only if they are done in a place where the mess can be cleaned up quickly, like a shower for instance.”

  “What’s bukkake?” I wondered out loud.

  He smiled before he pulled out his Samsung Galaxy Note and accessed Google before he showed me a very explicit image of a woman covered in multiple men’s semen.

  “Oh. I don’t think golden showers or bukkake interest me but I have always wanted to have a threesome with you and another man…just because…you know, I haven’t ever had sex with anyone else but you.”

  He smiled. “I can ask Grant or Will to participate. Which one are you most attracted to?”

  “Wait a minute? You mean the two guys in your group who have girlfriends that are my best friends? Are you shitting me?”

  Kaz rolled his eyes. “Listen, I know they’re your friends but Faith, Laurel and Sasha have…how shall I put this…open relationships with their men. None of them have ever been married and they enjoy the rock star lifestyle. Just because they have a permanent piece of pussy in their life doesn’t mean they aren’t going to get any on the side. Besides, it’s not cheating if they tell their girlfriends what is going on and I am there with you. I consider cheating to be what Talia is doing to Seth, not sharing you with someone else.”

  I looked sheepishly at him before I bit my lip. “Do we have an open relationship?”

  “Fuck no and that is why I get harangued by the guys so much. I would be willing to share you for the night but what went down between Faith, Jaden and I will never happen again.”

  This revelation definitely threw me for a loop. “What are you talking about?”

  “I want you to hear it from me first because I don’t want that bitch to have any leverage when it comes to fucking up our relationship. For about six months, both Jaden and I were bangin’ Faith. Sometimes together, sometimes apart but she was into it and although she was Jaden’s first, I kind of moved in on her after turning her down flat. She was a firecracker in bed and very fun but a little too possessive. She still thinks to a certain extent you ‘stole’ me from her because you and I are an item now. Problem was we were never goin’ out. She was a fuck-toy as far as I was concerned and Jaden’s old lady. He’s never really been possessive about the ladies until he started in on the drugs and then he didn’t want to share her anymore.

  “That’s the real reason why they broke up. It had nothing to do with drugs, Syd. She’d like you to believe she’s Miss Perfect but she was a recreational user and did ‘em right along with Jaden. As she told me, ‘I thought we were just having fun—how was I supposed to know the dumb son of a bitch would get hooked?’ Her words, not mine.”

  “Oh, Christ.” I shook my head. “I understand why you’re telling me but is that why she won’t talk to me? Is she that upset you’re not fucking her anymore?”

  “I guess so. She’s on the war path and, to be perfectly honest, I’m not sure if you two will patch up your relationship. I really hope you do but don’t be surprised if it’s months into the tour as opposed to days or weeks.”

  My brain had begun to spin and I didn’t know if it was everything I’d just been told or perhaps a change in elevation but nothing felt the same and I had a feeling I had bitten off more than I could chew by deciding to come on tour with Scarlet Fever and Winter’s Regret.

  We arrived at MGM Grand Hotel and Casino shortly after nine in the evening.

  Since we were considered VIP guests, we didn’t check in like normal people and had to ride a different elevator up to the premiere suites where the bands were staying. Kaz was tired and had a concert to look forward to in a couple of days. They would spend the vast majority of their time rehearsing because he wouldn’t and couldn’t take any chances with Jaden’s playing now that he was back on drugs again.

  It wasn’t like Kaz couldn’t play electric guitar and he’d brought his classic and beautiful Les Paul original just in case along with a beautiful acoustic guitar. Neither which had ever been played very much and were in pristine condition.

  “I can’t be too careful. Last thing I need is Jaden falling down on the job. I know I sound harsh and usually, even when he’s on drugs, he still brings his ‘A’ game to the table but this is our first official concert. There will be a review in the paper and a Rolling Stone reporter will be there. We’re on the November issue and he wants to get some good shots. That means you join him so you can get some photos of the band. You have your camera?”

  “Yep. A nice little Nikon that will make me look like a fan.” I smiled sarcastically at him but apparently his sense of humor had left him.

  “You’re joking, right?”

  “Of course I am, you dope. I have the right camera with the paparazzi scopes and what not. I told you I took photography in school so I am not some novice. I know what I am doing.”

  He walked over to me and kissed my lips quickly. “I’m going to shower and then I am off to bed. It’s going to be a busy day tomorrow. What are you going to do?”

  I wrapped my arms around his waist and remembered Laurel’s text earlier. She wanted us to meet up downstairs so we could head over to the West Wing Bar and get a drink together. Never one to turn down a drink, I’d acquiesced but now all I wanted to do was stay in with Kaz.

  “I’m meeting Laurel downstairs for a drink. I actually tested the shower on the bus and it’s very adequate,” I replied as I sidled closer to him.

  “Let me check.” He unbuttoned my skinny red jeans and stuck his hand down my crotch. Two fingers plunged inside of me and although sex was the farthest subject from my mind, he made me wet as my juices flooded his fingers. He caressed my clit as he pulled out and licked my juices off his fingers.

  “Was that necessary?” I inquired in mock annoyance as I buttoned my jeans and zipped them up.

  “Absolutely.” He sniffed his fingers. “Yeah, you definitely smell clean. One drink and get your ass back up here. I want to fuck you tonight.”

  “Such poetry you speak, Mr. Gillian.”

  “I’m a rock star babe, not a poet. Hurry along and get th
at sexy ass back here so go…now.”

  I kissed his lips again but his left hand wrapped itself around the back of my neck and pulled me closer to him. He smelled pretty fresh to me but I’d lived with him long enough to know he took two, sometimes three, showers per day. It was apparent from his squeaky clean, lightly tanned skin and shiny hair.

  Kaz’s tongue slipped into my open mouth and I responded eagerly as I ground my body against his pending erection. He ended our kiss and his lips brushed my forehead. “Fuck! You drive me absolutely mad. Get out of here before I rip those jeans off you and fuck you right here and now.”

  I grabbed my oversized, black leather slouchy bag courtesy of Gucci and strolled out of the suite. Although I usually carried Hermès bags, I decided it was best if I toned down all my high-end labels and Kaz agreed. To me, downgrading from my ultra-expensive French designers equated to switching to less expensive Italian designers. I quickly caught an elevator downstairs and although my sex still tingled from Kaz’s touch, I tried to cut off the feeling by standing straight and my legs close to one another. If I could just forget his fingers had just been inside of me, it would be a blessing.

  Laurel sat with Will at the West Wing Bar though she was the one who specifically told me it would just be the two of us. Obviously, she didn’t feel the same rules applied to her or she wouldn’t have been draped all over Will like a cheap suit.

  “Hiya!” I exclaimed as I walked up to them and sat next to Laurel on the bar stool. She already had a dirty martini in front of her while Will nursed a neat scotch. The bartender immediately came over and I ordered a Dewars, neat.

  “Whoa…that’s not a very ladylike drink. What’s wrong with a mojito or a Cosmopolitan?” Laurel inquired as she looked my way, her hazel-green eyes bright in the dim light.

  “Less calories and besides, I don’t do many girly cocktails anymore.”

  Will snickered. “She’s fucking Kaz, babe. He has a tendency to…mold and shape his women the way he wants them to be.”

  The bartender delivered my drink and I slid over a fifty dollar tip before I swigged from my scotch. “I resent that compliment. Kaz doesn’t make me do anything I don’t want to do. He’s one of the best boyfriends I have ever had and I absolutely adore him. Believe me, I’m not some kind of mindless robot who will do anything to keep him happy.”

  “He’s not going anywhere because he likes you and he’s comfortable,” Will explained before he finished his scotch and signaled the bartender for another. “I’m talking about exclusivity. You do realize his wife didn’t get that. Sure, he didn’t have sex with groupies while on the road but he got plenty of blow jobs from various fans who were comfortable to oblige. I’m just sayin’, he might tell you all kinds of shit but remember at the end of the day who he is. We aren’t nine to five guys and if you’re expecting a white picket fence and a man who never cheats then you’re not gonna get that, Sydney.”

  “Syd is fine.”

  “You see? You used to hate it when people called you Syd!” Laurel exclaimed.

  I rolled my eyes. “Please, do dispense this well needed advice.”

  “Well, Will and I talked about it and there’s just too much temptation so we decided to have an open relationship…on his end. He doesn’t want me sleeping with other guys but if some chick catches his fancy, he knows he can fuck her and it’s okay with me.”

  I finished my scotch and shook my head in frustration. “Can we lay off all the F-bombs, seriously, and talk like normal people? Why couldn’t you just say you don’t mind if he sleeps with other women?”

  “Because he won’t be doing any sleeping…he’ll be fucking them and then he’ll come back to our suite, take a shower and sleep with me.”

  “Well, what ever’s clever but my relationship with Kaz is none of your business and if that’s what you called me down here for, you wasted your time.” I stood from the bar stool. “Have fun, you two crazy love birds. I can get drunk in my own suite. I’m off.”

  I walked away before Laurel could say anything and that was fine with me because I didn’t understand how me dating Kaz had become band business. What was with all the warnings about how I was living in a dream world because our relationship—as I viewed it—only existed in my head and everyone else thought I was in Cloud Cuckoo Land? It wasn’t so much what they said but the way they looked at me with that mixture of jealousy and pity because I just didn’t “get” it.

  Since when did Kaz breaking my virginity make me stupid, gullible and weak-minded? I was still the same person I was before except new and improved. I wasn’t nearly as selfish as I had been and I tried to always think about others and how my decisions would affect them.

  Speaking of other people, I climbed into the elevator and ran into Damira who already had boarded and held the hand of a young boy.

  “How convenient. Can you tell me what suite Kaz is staying in? Xander wants to say goodnight to his father before he will agree to go to bed.” She glared at me with cool amber brown eyes before she smiled ingratiatingly.

  “Yeah. I’ll just take you.” I popped a few Altoids before I turned toward the little boy.

  He was beautiful with a peaches and cream complexion, Damira’s Slavic-heavy features and Kaz’s gorgeous aquamarine eyes. Xander held out his hand. “Are you my dad’s new girlfriend?”

  “Um…I am your dad’s friend,” I replied though my eyes kept darting towards Damira. She didn’t exactly look pleased when her son had said that.

  “I told you how your father is, Xander. There will be plenty of different…women…you will see him with on tour but they are all friends. You know, like how you’re friends with Elizabeth at school?” she explained like she was talking to a two year old instead of a child who was in Kindergarten.

  “Actually, Kaz won’t have a lot of different ‘friends’ on this tour. There will just be me,” I explained to Xander as he looked into my eyes with shock and surprise. “Your dad doesn’t think it’s necessary to have a lot of different friends and we both agree it is for the best if you see the same people over and over again.”

  “Oh, cool. So, we can become friends?” he wondered out loud.

  I nodded my head as the elevator ding alerted us to the correct floor. A card key was needed before the doors would open and I swiped it against the machine before a small red light went green and the doors opened.

  We walked directly to the suite I shared with Kaz in silence. I opened the door and shouted out to him we had company just in case he wasn’t appropriately dressed.

  He walked into the sitting room wearing a pair of slightly baggy blue jeans though they still hugged his beautiful physique with expensive leisure and a black wife-beater. His face lit up the moment he saw Xander and he quickly scooped up his son and turned him around in circles.

  I watched them with a slight smile on my face. I had never seen him so happy and all the sudden, his ex-wife being on tour with us didn’t seem like such a big deal after all. Not if having his son around was going to bring him so much happiness.

  “Don’t think you’ve won, bitch, because you haven’t,” she said to me in a low voice.

  I turned and realized she was only several inches from me and the intimacy was a bit strange with a woman I’d instantly detested the moment I’d met her.

  “What are you talking about exactly? I can’t be happy to see Kaz excited to hold his son? A person you have seemed to hold hostage every time you get a hair up your ass and decide he’s done something wrong?”

  “You don’t have a fucking clue what you are talking about, you spoiled, wannabe Paris Hilton mindless twit!” Damira exclaimed before she grabbed my left wrist and squeezed hard. “Do you honestly think for one second if I truly wanted Kaz back in my life that couldn’t be accomplished? Look at him with his son. He came from a broken background, the same as me—despite all his family’s wealth—and he would sacrifice his own happiness for his son. Are you going to seriously look me in the eyes and honestly tell
me you can compete with that?”

  My head swam with too much alcohol and not enough food. I clearly wasn’t thinking because I snatched my arm from her grasp and walked out of the suite ever so softly. My last memory was of watching Kaz playing with Xander and although my heart ached, I also knew that no one could accuse of him of being a lousy father.

  Chapter Seven

  Sexy Bitch in Heat

  Kaz horsed around with Xander until his son’s first yawn and then he pulled him close in an embrace. “Time for bed, young man. It’s almost eleven o’clock. Way past your bedtime.”

  “Okay, Daddy.” He embraced his father and smiled. “Daddy, will I be able to see that nice blonde lady again?”

  “Yes, of course you will. Why? Did Mommy say any different?”