Shadow Haven

by AJ Schippers

  Alexandra’s eyes darkened, and her expression became closed off.

  Sore topic, Julia thought. She didn’t push for more information when Alexandra turned and motioned for Julia to follow her.

  Alexandra sighed as she stepped into the kitchen. With one innocent comment, Julia had been able to change her entire mood. The friendliness Alexandra tried to display at first had now become an overwhelming desire for this tour to be over as quickly as possible. Sharing her home with clients had never been an issue. Well, it had been once, but that had quickly been resolved. Still, that feeling of dread was never far from her mind, and if she wasn’t careful, she would let it consume her. She always made sure she was in control, but this particular memory always seemed to take that control away from her.

  “Since you have arrived earlier than I expected, I had no time to ask Caroline for your favorites,” Alexandra said. “So I am afraid you are stuck with what I have when it comes to food. What time do you usually wake up?”

  “Six thirty in the morning.”

  “Living on the island can be a bit like camping. Sometimes your body adjusts to the sun, meaning you will wake up when the sun comes up and you will want to go to bed when the sun sets. I will make sure breakfast is ready at seven. Lunch will be on the table at noon, and dinner will be ready at six. Feel free to eat your food elsewhere or join me at the dinner table in the living room.”

  “Okay, thanks. So,” Julia drawled, “where’s the library?”

  Alexandra couldn’t help but chuckle. “It saddens me to say there is no such thing, Ms. Quinn. Perhaps that should be my next project. There are books in the living room and in my office, though. Feel free to read them.”

  “I can’t believe that you have all this stuff, but you don’t have a library. You should build another cabin and just fill it to the brim with books.”

  “Not a bad idea. I will put it on my list of things to think about. I take it you like books, then?”

  “I do. I didn’t have a lot of books when I grew up, but the ones I did have are still favorites to this day. Books are a portal to another world, and I love immersing myself in them. Perhaps it’s silly.”

  “Not at all. If I find books scattered throughout the house, I will make sure to put them in the living room.”

  “Thank you.” Julia smiled. “I appreciate that.”

  “I would show you this room, but you might have a heart attack, and I am afraid I am not equipped to revive you properly.” Alexandra let a finger slide down a dark-colored wooden door. “This room, however,” she said as she pointed to another, “I think you might enjoy quite a bit.”

  The smell of chlorine hit Julia’s nose. It wasn’t the biggest pool, but it was large enough to allow a good swim. She was looking forward to doing laps here in the morning. “It’s beautiful,” Julia said.

  “Thank you. The pool is heated, so it should bring you some comfort. I often find myself soaking in here for hours at a time.” She pointed to a panel on the wall. “The pool stays covered when not in use, but if you press the off button, it will automatically uncover. Just remember to press the on button when you are done.” Walking along the side of the pool, she opened a glass door and invited Julia to step inside.

  “Are you kidding me? A sauna?”

  “Well, what can I say? I like my luxuries. Besides, it is a surprisingly wonderful setting for aftercare.”

  “So, what? You hug your clients while sweating out your hard work?”

  “Something like that.” Alexandra wiggled her eyebrows. “If you wish, I could give you a demonstration,” she teased. They stepped out of the sauna, and Alexandra closed the door.

  “Look,” Julia said as she followed Alexandra. “You said Caroline paid you money to let me stay here. I honestly don’t care what business you have with her, but if she paid you to take me on as a client or something, I’m telling you right now I am not interested.”

  “Wait. You think Caroline sent you here as a possible client?”

  Julia crossed her arms over her chest. “Well, it certainly seems like it.”

  “There is one thing you should know about me, Ms. Quinn. What you see is what you get. I promise you that my behavior is not an act. I am a dominant, and the way I speak to you is the way I speak to everyone. I think you are feeling confused or embarrassed, and that is perfectly okay. You have had quite the journey here, and you ended up having to adjust your expectations. I understand it will take you some time to absorb everything that has happened. So I suggest you go do something to relax, and while you do so, I would advise you to take some deep breaths. I will get dinner ready and call you when it is done.” Alexandra turned around and left.

  Standing there stock-still, literally gaping in her wake, wasn’t the most impressive response to Alexandra’s exit, but it was all Julia had in her. With a big sigh, she made her way to her own room in silence and let herself fall down on the mattress. Julia buried her head in the pillow. So far, her day had been anything but relaxing, and if this was the way things were going to go for the next week, she couldn’t wait to leave and give Caroline a piece of her mind. To think that her boss and friend had possibly sent her as a client was baffling. And it made her feel betrayed. Alexandra had seemed surprised at the idea, but she hadn’t exactly refuted the statement. Julia made a mental note to question her about it later.

  There had to be some guidelines if Julia was going to stay here and feel like she was actually on vacation, starting with telling Alexandra to tone it down a little.

  “Yeah, right. Like that’s gonna happen,” she murmured.

  Alexandra massaged her temples and groaned. This day had been…trying. It was a strange sensation, having to adjust her demeanor to her recent guest. But Alexandra had been looking forward to Julia’s arrival—in August. The way Caroline had talked about Julia had made her smile. It was obvious that her friend was very proud of her employee and wanted to give her a well-deserved break from the hard work she had been doing. And Julia was so different from the clients who usually resided with her. They were obedient, eager to please, and asked no questions, whereas Julia was full of questions and full of resentment for having been sent here without knowing all the details of where she would be staying.

  It was obvious Julia was angry at Caroline for not telling her Alexandra was a dominatrix. It was something Alexandra could understand, but not something she was used to, and she wasn’t quite sure how to deal with it. She couldn’t simply put Julia in her place, like she would do with her clients. Instead, she would have to give Julia some time to adjust to the situation and hope that she would soon feel more at ease. At the very least, she owed it to Caroline to give Julia a good vacation, rather than more days like the one they had had so far.

  She checked the timer on the oven, hoping that her guest liked lasagna. It was her signature dish, and she hoped that it could serve as a kind of peace offering. Julia intrigued her; there was a mystery about her… While she didn’t know the first thing about the woman, she did know there was something interesting buried beneath that prickly exterior of hers, and Alexandra intended to find out what it was.

  But for now, she would give them both some space to adjust to this new situation. Julia wasn’t the only one who felt uneasy; Alexandra just knew how to hide it better. It was something she had picked up at a young age, and she was an expert at it by now. It helped her in sessions with clients, as if her insecurities fueled her dominance, and for a brief moment in time, her feelings didn’t matter. During her sessions, she was in control: both of her client and of herself. But with Julia, she had to learn that who was in control didn’t matter. Julia was not a potential client; she was here on a vacation. And Alexandra… Well, she was going to have to learn how to let go of being in control in favor of making a friend.

  A knock startled Julia awake. She rubbed her eyes. When had she fallen asleep? What time was it? Another knock echoed through the room, and she groaned.

  “Ms. Quinn?” />
  She got off of the bed and opened the door while yawning. “I’m up, I’m up.”

  “Wonderful. Dinner is ready,” Alexandra said with a smile. “Please follow me.”

  Julia wondered if this was the first sincere smile she had seen on Alexandra. She took in the view of the table, which had been set up quite nicely. A white lace tablecloth hung evenly over the four sides, and Julia couldn’t help but grin back at her. It seemed Alexandra was a perfectionist in every aspect of her life. Silver cutlery shone brightly, and her mouth watered when she saw the glass of red wine.

  “This smells good,” Julia said, sitting down at the table.

  “I hope you will like it. I have slaved hard in the kitchen for you, Ms. Quinn,” Alexandra teased as she served them both a portion of lasagna.

  “I’m sure that must have been a strange sensation for you.” A soft moan escaped her as she took a bite of lasagna. “Okay, now this makes me feel like I’m on vacation.” Julia smiled when Alexandra shot her a quizzical look. “I can’t cook to save my life, so going on vacation is always a treat because I get properly fed. Although I do make a mean grilled cheese sandwich.”

  “Well, if you are open to it, I could give you some cooking lessons while you are here. The least I could do is to teach you how to boil an egg.”

  This conversation, while light, was a world of difference from their earlier ones, and while she still felt uneasy, Julia appreciated that Alexandra was making an effort. “I wasn’t actually planning on doing a whole lot, you know,” she said. “I just wanted to lie on a beach, soak up the sun, and read lots of books.”

  “You can still do all those things, although I really would advise against lying on the beach this time of year. I was not kidding when I said the weather can turn in a second. When I was a little child, I stayed here for a couple of weeks during the summer vacation and got hit in the face by a branch during a particularly heavy storm out of nowhere.”

  “Is that how you got your scar?” Julia had noticed it earlier. A small and slightly curved scar ran from her hairline down to her eyebrow.

  “I had a heavy concussion too, but I learned my lesson, and my family learned that I did not take kindly to orders.”

  “Is everything out of your mouth a reference to your lifestyle?” Julia blurted out. She regretted the statement as soon as it left her mouth. Alexandra had been nothing but kind to her during dinner. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that.”

  “I think you did,” Alexandra said. “And no, it actually isn’t.”

  Julia’s cheeks reddened with embarrassment at the mild scolding. “I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you use a contraction.” In an attempt to lighten the mood, she flashed her a broad smile.

  “My parents were very adamant about me speaking correctly. It helps in sessions as well. It adds a certain un no sé qué when you pronounce every word. I am not sure I can explain.”

  “I think I get it. I’m sure part of your charm is the capability of using your voice in a manner that leaves nothing to the imagination.”

  “Oh, I leave a lot to the imagination, Ms. Quinn. But you are correct. I know how to use my voice, and I do use it a lot. You are very perceptive.” She narrowed her eyes slightly as she gave Julia a thoughtful look.

  Julia’s attention was captured by the way Alexandra gave her wine a small swirl before bringing it to her mouth and taking a small sip. “Did Caroline pay you to take me on as a client?” she asked. It was an abrupt change in subject, but Julia had to know.

  “She did not. She reimbursed me for having you stay here. I know it may be hard to believe, but I truly think Caroline had the best of intentions in mind. She just went about it the wrong way. We all make mistakes, Ms. Quinn. Do not let this affect your friendship with Caroline; it would not be worth it.”

  “I’ll probably hold a grudge for a while; nothing wrong with making her sweat a little. So, why did she think we both could use a friend? I don’t mean to be rude, but we seem to be coming from two completely different worlds.”

  “So, someone powerful cannot be friends with someone—”

  “No, that’s not what I meant.” Julia held up a hand. “You do make a lot of references to your lifestyle.” She delivered the accusation mildly, though. “I just mean it’s hard for me to see what we have in common and why Caroline would think we would get along. So far, it’s been…difficult.”

  “You seem to handle it quite well, though,” Alexandra mused. “If I were put in your position, I probably would have demanded that someone bring me back to the city, and then I would have killed Caroline.”

  “I’m still contemplating doing exactly that. You and the captain both warned me that the seas are dangerous. I have no desire to die just because I want to get back to the mainland. Besides, I’ve earned my vacation, and I want to enjoy it. I just like to know the details. Winging things is not my style, and it’s a big adjustment.”

  “Can I help you ease your mind somehow? If you have questions, I will probably have answers.”

  “Why do you call me Ms. Quinn?” Julia asked. She shoved another forkful of food into her mouth and tried not to moan in delight. Alexandra truly was an outstanding cook.

  “Remnants of my upbringing. If I call you anything other than that, you are either in big trouble or I feel incredibly comfortable around you.” Alexandra let a finger slide over the rim of her glass. “Besides, I don’t think you’d take kindly to me referring to you as a slut.” She held up a hand when Julia opened her mouth. “I am kidding, Ms. Quinn.”

  Julia shook her head slowly. Unbelievable. But she had to admit it was funny, and it reminded her of another question she wanted to ask. “Do I have to worry about any of your clients showing up unexpectedly while I’m here?”

  “No.” The single word was said with enough force to make it a complete sentence.

  Even though they’d just met, Julia believed her.

  “I have a strict invitation-only policy,” Alexandra continued. “My clients know better than to show up uninvited. That being said, I do have friends who may come by.”

  “You do sessions with friends as well? Doesn’t that get complicated?” Julia couldn’t imagine being dominated by a friend, only to come back the next day for a casual dinner.

  “I never said my friends come over for a session,” Alexandra said. “I have friends that I have played with in a casual manner. I can tie a friend up. I can tease them with my equipment. But I will never play with them as I do with my clients. That’s a line I refuse to cross.”

  “Why?”

  “Because I crossed it once, and it made things unnecessarily complicated. It was a lesson I needed to learn, though. I do not regret it.”

  Julia shifted in her seat. “Why did you decide to let me stay?”

  “I wouldn’t want to let Caroline down, and I know she would be disappointed if I had sent you back,” Alexandra said. “Not to say that it isn’t still an option, but you were supposed to be here anyway; you’ve just arrived a bit too early. She obviously thinks that we have more in common than either of us can currently see, but I trust her judgment. Perhaps after you’ve had some days to adjust to your situation, the future will look much brighter. So, as I have said before, while your company at the moment is quite unexpected, you are not unwanted.”

  Julia teared up and looked away. Unknowingly, Alexandra had mentioned the one word that had haunted Julia her entire life. Unwanted. It was the one feeling that had stuck with her as she’d grown up, always moving from one foster home to the next. For Alexandra to mention it now so casually made her feel truly welcome. Julia gave her a quick smile.

  “What was in that room that you didn’t want to show me? Is that where you hide all the bodies of play gone wrong?”

  “Not quite, Ms. Quinn. But to avoid making our day any more awkward, I would prefer to keep that room private for now. When you feel more comfortable on the island and, more importantly, around me, then I may change my mi
nd and show you what’s behind door number one. That being said, I would like to give you a tour of the island in the morning.”

  “I’d like that.” Julia collected the plates and brought them over to the sink. “So, do dominants wash the dishes or dry them with a towel?”

  “I am just a normal human being, you know,” Alexandra said as she picked up a towel. “But, I prefer to see other people get wet.”

  Julia’s cheek flushed at the statement, and with a grumble, she started washing the dishes.

  “So, tell me, Ms. Quinn: why did you need a vacation so badly?”

  When the scorching hot water burned her skin, Julia dropped the plate. She reached down and started washing it. “I think for the past few years, I’ve done nothing but work. I practically live at the office, and you can only do that for so long before it just breaks you apart.”

  “No one waiting for you at home to help defuse the tension after a hard day’s work?”

  “No. I live in a run-down apartment that I rent for way more money than it’s worth. I’m currently not seeing anyone, so I prefer to spend my time at work. I feel more useful there.”

  Alexandra offered a small smile. “Your parents must be proud of you. Caroline spoke highly of your work ethic, if only for a brief moment.”

  Julia immediately tensed up. She absolutely loathed having to talk about family. As far as she was concerned, she had no family and no desire to talk about her childhood. She took a deep breath and decided to change the topic, hoping Alexandra would let her without asking any questions. “How did you and Caroline meet?”

  “I think we met almost sixteen years ago at college. We bumped into each other in line for coffee, got to talking, and we never really stopped. There have been times where we were far apart distance wise, but we always managed to stay in contact throughout. She is my best friend and the best business partner I’ve ever had. I trust her completely, which is another reason why I have no issue letting you stay here.” She held up her hands when Julia was about to protest. “It is why I had no issue with the original date of you coming here.”