Shadow Haven
Page 11
“So, basically, you could tie someone to it and leave the room to get coffee,” Julia said.
“I could, but I never would. I might blindfold someone and make them think I left the room, but I never actually would. Accidents happen, but I would never risk the safety of my clients. In my line of work, I can’t afford to make mistakes.”
She took her time, explaining the different pieces of furniture to Julia, making sure at every turn that Julia was still okay. She knew how overwhelming it could be to see all this, rather than look at it from a television screen, and she didn’t want to scare Julia off. She took her time to answer Julia’s pleasing questions, providing her with examples whenever she was confused.
Alexandra pointed to the ceiling, where several sturdy beams were located. “Do you know what Shibari is?”
“I have no idea,” Julia said softly.
“It’s a type of bondage,” Alexandra said. “But honestly, it’s a lot more than that. I have been trained by some of the best Riggers in Shibari. It’s not something you simply learn by looking it up online. Shibari is intimate. The emphasis is placed on the path to the bondage, rather than the end result. As a Rigger, your movements are slow and deliberate; the ropes you use become an extension of your hands. You are constantly staying in touch with your subject. Shibari requires trust between the Rigger and the one who is undergoing it. Without that trust, mistakes are easily made, and that’s when people end up getting hurt.”
“You’re very passionate about it,” Julia said.
Alexandra nodded. “It’s one of my favorite types of play. Shibari requires discipline, and, even more, it requires your heart, spirit, and mind. In my opinion, Shibari can be compared to art, where the submissive is the canvas. You are painting a picture, deliberately thinking about every stroke you put on that canvas to gain the best end result.”
Her training and the shows she had attended had given her a level of appreciation for the finer art of Shibari. Even to someone who wasn’t into BDSM, the stories the Riggers told through Shibari were absolutely enticing.
“How are you feeling about all this so far?”
“It’s a lot,” Julia said. “I can see why you’re so passionate about it, but I still find it hard to imagine why someone would pay you for all this. Why not just get a partner and worship their boots?”
“I think it’s a little bit more complicated than that,” Alexandra said. “Some people want to keep these desires hidden from their partners. Others crave a level of control that their partners can’t give them. Some are single and are just looking for some casual play. But I understand why it would be hard to grasp the concept. I suppose that it all comes down to preference.”
“Why do you love it so much? Shibari, I mean.”
“Because it is a total power exchange. My clients have to give in to the feeling of the ropes on their skin and body. It feels like a never-ending embrace, it releases endorphins, and it’s a total rush. When I first did it with one particular client, she passed out from sheer exhaustion, but I was prepared for it. Afterward, she said it was the best massage she’d ever had,” Alexandra said with a chuckle.
“It sounds oddly comforting,” Julia said.
“It can be comforting, yes, but I’ve also had clients who had panic attacks while being suspended. It’s why you always need safety cutters, in case of an emergency. It can take a long time to untie someone, but with the cutters, it quickens the process.”
“So safety is important,” Julia said.
“The most important thing of all, yes. At all times, you need to make sure that everything you do is safe, sane, and consensual.”
Julia reached out to the collection of whips and paddles on the wall, before retracting her hand. “Can I touch them?”
“You may.”
As her fingers followed the curves of a red flogger all the way down to the leather straps, Julia asked, “What do you use this for?”
“It’s a flogger. Basically, it’s a nicer version of a whip.” Alexandra removed the flogger from the wall and held out her own hand, swiftly moving the flogger through the air with her other hand before letting it fall down on the palm of her hand. “It feels much nicer on a bare back, though.”
“Can…can I try?”
“I promise it won’t hurt.”
Julia held out her hand. “If it hurts, I’m calling 911.”
With small steps, Alexandra moved behind Julia. “Is this okay?” She waited for Julia to give her consent, then wrapped her arms around Julia’s waist. Alexandra leaned her head closer and whispered in her ear. “Breathe.” When Julia inhaled sharply, she let the flogger hit Julia’s hand softly a couple of times with a flick of her wrist.
“Like magic,” Julia murmured.
Alexandra laughed. “What?”
“That’s the first thing that came to my mind when I saw the way your hand moved.”
“Well, you definitely wouldn’t be the first one to utter something that does not make sense to me during a flogging… It would be a perfect safe word for you, though,” Alexandra said as she stepped back from Julia and hung the flogger back on the wall.
“Aren’t safe words supposed to be—what in the world is this?” Julia caught sight of a piece of furniture that looked like a glorified gym horse, one that was obviously intended for much kinkier purposes than jumping over it.
“A spanking horse.”
“A what now?”
Alexandra laughed again, this time at Julia’s comical facial expression. “A spanking horse. You straddle it, lean forward, and provide me with a great view, not to mention a wonderful opportunity to spank your ass.”
“I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn’t this. You seem to know what you’re talking about, though. I suppose that’s a good thing.”
“As a Domme, I need to have extensive knowledge of my equipment and how to use it properly. Every piece of furniture in here, as well as every piece of equipment that I have, I have had used on me in training. Not as a submissive, but I felt it was important to know how everything felt before using them on someone else. The whip is a real bitch.” Alexandra grinned.
Julia chuckled and slowly shook her head.
“So, are you wanting to swim back to the mainland yet?” Alexandra asked as she sat down on top of a padded cage and crossed her legs.
“No. I mean, I’m still wrapping my head around all that you’ve told me, but at least I no longer feel like there’s this big secret between us. You’ve showed me something that is obviously important to you, and I can see why it is. That being said, I think I’ve seen enough for one day.”
“Fair enough,” Alexandra said. She got back on her feet and placed a hand on the small of Julia’s back to guide her out of the room. Switching off the light, she wondered when she would next step into this room and, more importantly, if it would be with Julia.…
Chapter 8
Julia wasn’t quite sure what had woken her up but flinched when the loud rumbling in the sky announced its presence. It took her a moment before she realized that she was in Alexandra’s bedroom. After they had watched a movie, Julia’s head had started throbbing, and she hadn’t protested when Alexandra had offered to sleep together again. Alexandra’s invitation was both open and intimate. It wasn’t about sex or taking advantage of Julia but rather a promise to keep her safe through the night, and she’d be damned if she was going to turn that down.
Sometime during the night, they had switched sleeping positions, and Julia was now being used as the little spoon. More importantly, Alexandra’s hand had crept under her T-shirt and lay protectively on her stomach as if to shield Julia from the thunder.
She closed her eyes once more when she felt Alexandra’s breath make the tiny hairs on her neck tickle, and she sighed contently.
“Are you okay?” Alexandra murmured as she stirred and pulled Julia closer to her.
“Yeah, just got woken up by the thunde
r.”
“Why are you so scared of thunder?” Alexandra asked softly as her thumb stroked the skin of Julia’s stomach.
Julia found it hard to breathe with the way Alexandra was gently touching her. Part of her longed for more, but this…this was so utterly perfect. When Alexandra shook her gently, Julia rolled over, her face inches away from Alexandra’s. She was aware of the goose bumps that appeared on her skin as Alexandra’s hand now moved to the small of her back.
With her eyes closed, Alexandra was breathtaking, and Julia had a hard time ignoring the warm glow that she felt soaring through her body. “Dunno,” she finally said. The last thing she wanted was to have an in-depth conversation about why thunder scared her. Now that her eyes had adjusted to the low light, Julia found she’d much rather look at Alexandra and study every inch of her face.
They lay there quietly for a while. When Alexandra’s breathing deepened, Julia reached out and softly traced her face with a finger. Julia’s lips curled up in a smile when Alexandra caught her finger between her teeth. It traced around her lips. She forgot how to breathe when Alexandra opened her eyes and flicked her tongue against the finger. “What are you doing?” Julia whispered.
Alexandra let go of the finger. “Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”
“I was merely admiring the aesthetics of your physical appearance.”
Alexandra snorted. “I can honestly say no one has ever said that to me before.”
“I don’t understand you,” Julia said. “I barely know you, and yet you’ve shown me more kindness than anyone else ever has.”
“You are very worthy of being treated kindly, Julia. There’s something about you that makes me want to protect you from all the evil in this world.”
“Why?”
“Because you deserve it.”
Julia closed her eyes as she took a shaky breath. “I feel things around you that I have never felt before, and it scares me. I’m not good at this stuff.”
“Define ‘stuff.’”
“I’ve never opened up to anyone like I have with you. It’s like you see right through all my defenses. I don’t think it’s fair.”
“Maybe it’s time to let someone in,” Alexandra said gently as she tentatively moved in closer and kissed the top of Julia’s forehead. “You don’t have to do it all alone. It’s okay to open yourself up and let someone else take care of you for a while.”
“I don’t think I know how to do that. I don’t like being vulnerable.”
“You seem to slowly be coming to terms with it. Don’t think about it too much. Just let it happen.”
Julia sighed heavily. She hated that she always ended up overthinking, especially when she could be sleeping in Alexandra’s arms.
“You’re doing the opposite of not thinking too much,” Alexandra murmured as she stared into Julia’s eyes. “I would be the last person to judge you. It’s just you and me. You don’t owe anyone an explanation.”
A tinge of anxiety took residence in the pit of Julia’s stomach. She didn’t want to have to think about this now. Alexandra’s words were perfect, though. Somehow, every time Alexandra opened her mouth, Julia’s heart seemed to open as well.
“I’m tired,” Julia yawned. A wicked grin spread over her face. “I’d like breakfast in bed when I wake up, please.”
Alexandra laughed. “Dream on, Julia.”
Julia woke several hours later to an empty bed, and she immediately missed the warm body that had been cuddled up to hers all night long. She rubbed her eyes as she sat up straight and stretched her arms over her head.
“So much for breakfast in bed,” she murmured as she got out of bed and walked over to her own bedroom to take a much-needed shower.
Much refreshed afterward, she made her way to the kitchen, where she found Alexandra sitting at the table. “Good morning.”
Alexandra glanced at the clock on the wall. “Afternoon, sleepyhead. How are you feeling?”
“Pretty good,” Julia said. “My head doesn’t hurt, so can I have my coffee now?”
“I don’t know,” Alexandra said. “A concussion takes time to heal. But I suppose…if you’re feeling okay.” She stood up and cupped Julia’s chin to inspect the cut on her forehead.
Julia knew it looked better than it had before. Even though she sported a dark bruise, the wound itself was starting to heal.
“I think you should keep it Band-Aid free now. I’m no expert, but it looks like it’s healing quite nicely.”
Julia nodded when Alexandra dropped her hand and went to grab a cup of coffee. She groaned with delight when the hot liquid made its way down her throat, and Alexandra laughed.
“I don’t think I want to know what you’re like after a couple of days without caffeine.”
“Incredibly cranky,” Julia said as she sat down. “You forgot about my breakfast in bed. I thought you were a good hostess?”
“If you want breakfast, you know where the kitchen is.”
A semi-dramatic sigh fell from Julia’s lips. “You’re gonna make me eat a bowl of cereal on vacation? How shocking.” She poked her tongue out at Alexandra.
“Someone’s in a good mood,” Alexandra said. “So, I have something I want to run by you.”
“Okay.”
“You’ve asked me before if you had to worry about any clients showing up unannounced. My answer remains the same. You have nothing to worry about. Although”—her gaze sought out Julia’s—“I forgot about a session that was booked months ago. With all the drama around the mix-up in dates, it completely slipped my mind.”
“When?”
“Tomorrow. They’ll stay for a couple of days.”
Julia’s gaze dropped from Alexandra’s face, and she quietly murmured, “You want me to leave?”
“What? No. Not at all. I would love nothing more than for you to stay.” She covered Julia’s hand with her own and squeezed it lightly. “I’m not telling you this because I want you to leave. I’m telling you this because we might get company for a couple of days, but only if you’re comfortable with it. If you’re not comfortable, I will reschedule my session.”
Julia shrugged. “This is your house. I have no say over it.” She hated that she was feeling jealous, but the idea of having to share Alexandra for the next couple of days just didn’t sit well with her. They were just getting to know each other better. What if all that changed as soon as they had company?
“Julia, you do have a say in it. I want you to be comfortable.”
“It’s fine.” Julia did her best to keep her voice emotionless.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah.”
Alexandra lifted up Julia’s chin with a finger. “Tell me the truth, please.”
“It’s just that I’m not really looking forward to being on my own for a couple of days.”
“Why would you be alone?”
“Well, if they’re here, you’re going to be spending a lot of time with them, right? But it’s okay. I can entertain myself.”
“Hey. Listen to me. Nothing is going to change. They’ll stay for a few days and, yes, I’ll be spending time with my client, but that doesn’t mean I won’t be spending time with you as well. Perhaps, if you would be open to it, you could learn a thing or two as well. Besides, I’ve told you before that Shibari is beautiful to watch, even if you’re not into BDSM.” Alexandra grinned. “And my client is bringing her partner, and they are quite the exhibitionists. In fact, when I told them I had a houseguest, they were quite excited at the thought of showing off. They don’t often get to do that.”
Julia smiled and raised her eyebrows. That was an unexpected and intriguing offer. But… “I thought we were going to take it easy with that stuff?”
“We are. I’m not offering to tie you up. I’m offering you a chance to see what it’s all about. You don’t have to watch. I just honestly think you might like to see it.”
Julia nodded. She was slightly curious, but if she admitted that, it would op
en up a part of herself that there might be no holding back. “We’ll see.”
“So, you’re okay with them coming over?”
“Yeah. As long as I don’t have to address anyone with titles and shit.”
Alexandra grinned. “Your vocabulary is astounding, dear. You are never required to use any titles with anyone, unless you are comfortable with that. They will address me with titles, though. Do you think you’re okay with that?”
“Miss Alexandra?” Julia felt a warm shiver run through her body as the words fell from her lips. A slight flush crept up her neck when Alexandra’s eyes widened and she drew a sudden breath. It was obvious Alexandra liked to be addressed that way.
“Sure,” Julia said. “Like I said, as long as I don’t have to call anyone that. I’d rather stick with what I know best. They’re not gonna have, like, crazy-monkey-BDSM sex in our company, right?”
Alexandra huffed playfully. “Honestly, Julia. BDSM and crazy-monkey-sex shouldn’t even be in the same sentence. I think this may be a perfect learning opportunity for you.”
“So,” Julia said as she bit her lip, “this session. Is it you doing your job, or is this, like, a private playtime thing?”
“Completely professional. My client has been with me for quite some time. I know her well, and I have met her partner a couple of times. They’re coming here to learn more about Shibari.”
“I guess I still don’t quite understand how it all works. I don’t really understand how you could play with someone and not feel a thing for them, or why someone would want that.”
“I think it simply comes down to someone wanting their playtime and me providing it for them. Feelings aren’t needed. It’s the act that they want. If I were to have feelings for someone while playing with them, I would have to upgrade that relationship from it simply being work. So far, that hasn’t happened yet.” She looked up almost shyly at Julia. “That is, until you came along.”
Julia nodded. It made sense. “Please tell me they’ll be wearing clothes in the house.”
“Absolutely. Aside from the usage of titles, you will not be exposed to anything BDSM related unless you decide to step into my playroom with us.” She smiled at Julia and huskily murmured, “Does this mean you will be watching?”