"Tell Will I love him. And when he's ready, please tell him my story. Hopefully one day he'll see fit to forgive me," I said, lowering my head.
"I will," Deborah said. "I'll tell him everything once he's ready to hear it. He just needs some time right now."
"I know. I understand. I'm glad he found someone, and maybe one day you and I will get to know each other. In the meantime, it's time for me to go. If Will ever wants to talk, Stewart knows how to reach me."
Entering the abbey, I walked with Charlotte beside me hooting and spinning in circles with her arms stretched out as she listened to the echo. She disappeared as I reached out to touch her hand. I understood Will's being haunted by our deaths more than he would ever know.
Chapter Nineteen
Deborah
After a night of bad dreams, I awoke the next morning, surprised to not find Will in bed beside me. My head felt heavy as I sat up and forced myself out of bed. I tried remembering what we did the night before, but my head hurt too much. Guess this is what a hangover feels like.
Finally managing to make it to the door, I stumbled a few feet then held on to the doorframe.
"Will?" I said, my voice raspy and dry. "Will? Where are you?"
"Will's gone," said a deep voice.
A chill went up my spine, raising the tiny hairs at the back of my neck. I gasped, feeling the icy clutch of fear again as yesterday rushed back to me. Reaching for the door, I tried to close it as quickly as possible but fell to the floor. As I attempted to stand, the sound of footsteps closed in so I crawled towards the bed, hoping to hide.
"Deborah, stop. You're going to get hurt," said the voice.
My heart felt like it would burst at any second. I couldn't breathe, and I shivered as a cold sweat covered my body. The room began to spin when a pair of strong hands slid under my arms and lifted me up like a rag doll.
"Please don't hurt me. I swear I don't know anything," I begged.
"Deborah, focus! It's me, Stewart. You're experiencing the aftereffects of the drug they gave you. The poison in it has a slow release."
Suddenly my vision cleared and I recognized him. Breathing a long sigh of relief and feeling weak, I let him carry me into the main room of the suite and set me down on the couch. As he entered the kitchen, I looked around for any sign of Will. I had hoped he would return to the hotel after leaving us at the monastery.
"Stewart? Where's Will? What do you mean he's gone?"
Stewart came back with a glass of something and handed it to me.
"Drink. It’s not going to taste good, but this elixir will counteract the poison in your system."
I took a sip and grimaced. The elixir was thick but cold. As I drank, I felt its effects already taking over the poison in my system.
"The whole thing?" I asked as I looked at the tall glass.
"Yes, just drink. I let myself in earlier when I came looking for Will. You were up but feverish. I hoped sleep would help, but it's obvious the drug they used was meant to kill Will after they released him."
"Kill?" I took a gulp of the liquid once I realized it would save my life.
"Will left the jet, but my sources tell me he's back in Canyon Cove at King Manor."
"Why would he just leave like that? Never mind, don't answer that. I can't even begin to imagine what he's going through. For twenty-five years he thought his parents were dead, now he knows his father is still alive."
"I'm sure when he's ready, you'll hear from him," Stewart said as he took the empty glass from me. "In the meantime, try not to worry."
"Not worry? People tried to kill us yesterday and you're telling me not to worry?" I couldn't help the hysteria in my voice.
He didn't seem fazed by my tone. Looking briefly at his watch, he turned back to me. His eyes changed from calm to dangerous and then calm again, but I knew I was safe.
"As of fifteen minutes ago, the organization those men belonged to has been terminated. The bodies were discovered," he chose his words carefully as if they meant much more than they should. "Will can now lead a normal life."
Stewart looked down, his brown eyes sad, and I realized how much Will's father being alive affected him, too. Remembering how he saved us, I couldn't help but ask how much he knew. I didn't know if he would tell me, but I had to give it a shot. He knew things Will needed to know but never would.
"Stewart? You knew Bill King was alive, didn't you?"
He didn't reply. He examined my face for a moment before walking over to the large window and looking outside at the picturesque view. Rubbing his bald head as if he was pushing imaginary hair out of his eyes, he finally sat on a large chair with his back to a corner of the room.
"Yes, I knew he was alive. I've always known."
I nodded, my suspicions confirmed. It wasn't enough though. Who was this mysterious man who devoted his life to the man I loved? Looking over at him, his eyes seemed warm and welcoming, not those of the vicious killer I knew him to be. How did he get that way?
Chapter Twenty
Stewart
Most people don't realize how transparent they are, I thought. In the seconds an average person took to make a decision, I already knew what their choice would be and why that person chose it. That didn't make me special. It made me observant.
Deborah sat curled up on the couch, and I knew what she wanted to ask. I waited for her to ask it. All these years, I never revealed anything about myself to anyone, and I could see the gears turning in her head as she realized she could just ask me. Do it, Deborah, ask. It really is that simple.
"How did you get involved in all of this? You were in your twenties when you started raising Will, that means you were already..." her voice trailed off, but I knew the word she couldn't bring herself to say.
"An assassin," I said, completing her sentence.
I couldn't help but grin. It was a word that always brought a smile to my face. She nodded, her face a mixture of awe and fear.
"You realize what you're asking me can get you killed, right?"
Deborah's face went white, and for a brief moment I thought she might get sick. I knew better than to mess with someone recovering from that poison, but I couldn't resist.
"Just because I asked doesn't mean you have to tell me," she said.
I could tell she was choosing her words carefully, not wanting to scare me away even though she herself was frightened. Sinking into the chair, I smiled at her, hoping to put her at ease.
"I'm playing with you, my dear, but you are right to be concerned. A hired assassin doesn't live as long as I have without knowing how to manipulate people."
"Is that what you've done to Will? Manipulated him his whole life?" she asked, her voice rising with anger.
"No. Will has always been different. He was the closest thing I ever had as family, and his father was like a father to me. I would risk my life for the King family. And I have."
Sitting quietly for a moment, I wondered how much I should tell her. It wasn't that I didn't trust her. I learned long ago that trust wasn't as important as fear, and I knew she wouldn't speak out of fear of what I could do to her.
"You have to understand that I have never told anyone my story before, not even Bill King. Although I'm sure he knew. You see, it all started around thirty years ago, when I was eighteen. I became an assassin because of a woman."
Thirty Years Ago
Jeanne DeMarco was the prettiest girl in the neighborhood. With her long, thick black hair and sparkling blue eyes, she could command the attention of anyone in town with just a smile. Somehow I lucked out and she only had eyes for me.
I never knew my father, and when I was younger a raid on the brothel my mother and I lived in took her away from me for the rest of my life. Placed in a halfway house for kids, I learned to take care of myself. I was rude, tough, and would do anything for the love of my life, Jeanne.
"I'm graduating high school next month, and then I'm gone," Jeanne said, lying in my arms as she pushed my shaggy
blond hair out of my eyes.
Every night I slipped into her bedroom and stayed over. Her parents never knew, and the halfway house didn't care what I did as long as I didn't end up in jail.
"Then we can go together. Wherever you want to go."
"No, Stewie. You don't understand. I need a better life than this shit hole."
"Please don't call me that. We can make a better life together. I'll do anything for you, Jeanne."
She sighed and rolled over, turning her back towards me. I closed the distance, pressing my body against hers and listening while her breathing slowed into the rhythmic pattern of sleep. I have to show her I can give her a better life or I'll lose her forever, I thought.
While Jeanne was in school the next day, I filled out job applications in the few neighborhood shops that were left. Every one of them turned me down. I was too young, too inexperienced, whatever excuses they could come up with. I knew the truth. I knew none of them wanted to hire some punk-ass kid from the halfway house. No one gave me a chance.
As I made my way to the high school to pick up Jeanne, I walked past Hargrove's. They were a small department store then, not the large fine department store chain Will inherited. That didn't happen until the flagship store was built where the old tenements once stood. One of those buildings was the halfway house I was supposed to call home.
Walking past a small window display, I noticed the jewelry department in the center of the store. It was staffed by a rickety old man with coke bottle glasses and a hump on his back. He looked like almost too easy of a mark, but when I spotted a thin gold chain with a heart dangling from it, I knew I needed to get it for my girl.
Swiping it was easy, almost the easiest grab I ever did. I felt a rush as I left the store, rubbing the gold heart in my pocket between my fingers. But as I got closer to the high school, a tall slender man with dark brown hair began walking beside me.
"For money or for your girl?" he asked as he walked beside me.
"What are you talking about, old man?"
"Don't play dumb with me, Stewart. I've been watching you for months."
"Then fuck off, you perv. You think I don't know about men like you who watch little boys?"
"Cut the act. I know you swiped that necklace for your girl. And I know she wants a better life than what's left here. I can help you with that."
"And why the hell would you do that? What do you want?"
"Because you remind me of myself when I was your age. Come with me and I'll show you what your life can be like."
School was letting out, and in the distance I easily spotted Jeanne walking down the brick steps of the school with her friends.
"She deserves better than this dump," I said quietly. "Let's go. But if you try any funny business, I swear I'll cut your balls off."
He laughed and turned up the block. I followed, trying to keep up with his long strides since he didn't bother to slow down. As he drove his large black Lincoln Continental out of the city, I realized I didn't even know his name, yet he knew mine.
"William King, by the way. By now you're wondering who I am. You can call me Bill."
We arrived at a large brick house in a suburban neighborhood. It was the biggest house I'd ever seen in person, and I found it hard to not look impressed. Inside, Bill showed me to his office, where a huge wooden desk dominated the room. Taking a picture frame off his desk, he perched himself on the edge and handed the photo to me.
"That's my Jeanne. Her name is Charlotte. She's not like us and would never understand the life we grew up in."
I looked at the picture of the happy couple holding a baby. She had the same eyes as Jeanne, and I couldn't help but let my guard down a little.
"You're nothing like me, man."
"Shut up and listen. I know you've had it rough. I'm not denying you that. But I know how you think. And I think I can train you."
"Train me for what?"
"Do you want to make a lot of money? Give that girl a better life?"
"Yes, I already said that. I'd do anything for her."
"The military has a strict training method that only a few are welcomed into and even less pass. I graduated from their elite system with honors. I'm leaving that business. Charlotte and Will deserve better, and I believe the store is the way to do that."
"What's that got to do with me? Just spill it, man."
He gave me a cross look, and I felt the icy grip of fear around my heart. Suddenly I understood what he was suggesting.
"I'm willing to train you the way I was trained. I need someone who can learn how the new cartel thinks and see when we can take advantage of their situation. You're going to help me with my last job and then protect my family. In exchange, I'll make you richer than you can imagine. You're still just a child--"
"I'm not a kid, I'm eighteen. I'm not even in high school anymore."
"Dropping out of school doesn't make you an adult. I'll make you into a man you can be proud of. One your girl won't look down on like she does now."
I stood up and got in his face. Bill wasn't disturbed at all and shoved me hard on my chest, forcing me back into the chair.
"You'll work for me," he said. “People will think you're my driver while I train you in the arts and methods that will help protect my family from harm. You'll be well compensated, but no one must know exactly what you do. No one. Understand?"
I nodded. I understood more than he could imagine.
That night, I entered Jeanne's window like I always did. She sat at her desk writing and didn't turn around when I entered.
"I did it, Jeanne. I found a way for us to get out of here. I'm going to make a great life for you," I said.
She didn't turn around at first. Instead, she shook her head slowly until she smiled sadly at me.
"Let's go to bed," she said.
Present Day
"I never saw her again. She left in the middle of the night while I was deeply asleep."
"Oh Stewart, that's so sad," Deborah said, now sitting at the edge of her seat with her face in her hands.
"Turns out what she was writing when I arrived was a letter to me. She met someone else, someone she thought would be able to help her get the life she wanted. And he convinced her they had to leave right away."
"Did you ever look for her?"
"No," I said quietly. "I finally accepted she didn't want me. She might have loved me, but I guess sometimes love isn't enough."
Chapter Twenty-One
Deborah
Alone in the suite after Stewart left, I knocked on Dianna's door, needing to talk. I heard a bit of a commotion on the other side of the door, then a male voice and a woman giggling. Did she change rooms without telling me?
Dianna opened the door a crack, her hair disheveled with a sheet wrapped around her body. My mouth dropped open in surprise.
"I know, I know!" she said as she pushed me further into my room and closed the door behind her. "We met yesterday. His name is Jean-Marc and I swear I'm already in love."
"Well, that explains that giant smile on your face," I said laughing. "I just never thought you were such a slut!"
"Slut? Me? No! I followed the three-date rule. We had lunch together, then dinner, and then drinks. See, three." She raised her brows at me and giggled again.
"Where did you meet him? Last I saw, you were surrounded by models."
"He came to our room. He's a design assistant for Gucci and they sent him out to do some grunt work, but he needed to borrow something. We just clicked. Even if we can't understand everything we say to each other. Hmm, maybe that's why we clicked," she said before bursting into laughter.
"I'll try to not keep you away for too long, but I wanted to talk to you about work."
"He has to leave soon anyway, they have a lot of work to do, too. Plus I can't wait to hear about your day with Will."
"That's the thing, Dianna, it was the worst day of my life."
I broke into tears I didn't realize were waiting at the
surface. Dianna tried to hug me while still holding onto her sheet. The sight of her waddling towards me, one arm outstretched, made me laugh, ending my tears. Quickly telling her what I thought I could, I explained the day's events.
"And now Will is gone. He's back in Canyon Cove and I can't think about anything else but going to him. He needs me. I know it."
"And what about the show? This was your dream and you worked so hard on it," she said.
"I know, and I'm torn, but to be honest I almost don't care. He means more to me than the show. I did it once, I can do it again. I'll get another show."
"Sure you won't regret leaving?"
"Right now when I think about staying, I see myself regretting not being with him."
"Then you know what to do."
She was right. I did know what to do. I had to be with him. Even if being with him only meant waiting for him to open up again.
"He left the jet. I'll ask Stewart about getting it ready so we can go. At least you'll get to ride on the fancy jet."
"Thanks Deb, but I'm going to stay. I have my plane ticket and I don't mind slumming it on a commercial line. I need to see where things go with Jean-Marc. I've never met anyone else like him."
"Well, I'm going to need details," I said jokingly, echoing what she said to me the day before. "Call me when you get back. I know I don't have to tell you to have fun."
"You know it!" she said as she grinned widely and waved before heading back through the door to her bedroom.
I heard giggling then squealing almost immediately and laughed as I distanced myself as much as possible from her door.
Stewart was able to get the jet ready for us to leave later that day. As I sat in my seat across the aisle from him, I wondered where I was going to go once we got back. I didn't have my apartment, and all my things were at Will's.
[Canyon Cove 02.0] No Regrets Page 13