I turned to look at him. “I don’t need friends.”
He gave me a barely there grin. “I think you do, City. You just don’t realize it.”
We both stared at each other, neither of us sure what to say.
I didn’t need a friend. I didn’t want one. I was just fine on my own.
“We better get to work.” He reached behind the seat and pulled out two pairs of gloves. “Let’s stack them first. Then, we’ll pull the truck around and load them.”
I nodded, unable to speak. My mind was traveling at warp speed, and I needed to focus all my attention on shutting it off. I grabbed a pair of gloves from him and stepped out of the truck. It was barely after ten, but the sun was already beating down on us, hot and unforgiving.
I walked a few feet to where the first square bale was. It felt like it weighed a hundred pounds as I picked it up and carried it to the next closest one. Landon walked farther down the field and grabbed two bales to add to my pile.
Show-off.
I grabbed another and carried it back as well. Once we had enough in this pile, we moved on to make another one, and on and on it went. The only positive thing was that this was busywork. It kept my thoughts away as I concentrated on stacking the bales together. As I worked, I listened to the sound of the tractors on the other side of the field, letting the dull roar fill my ears.
Time seemed to pass in slow motion as we worked. I kept glancing at my phone, expecting an hour or two to have passed, but in reality, it had only been ten minutes. Sweat trickled down my face, and my shoulders were on fire. I cursed myself for not putting on sunblock again. I was going to be fried by the time I made it back to the house.
“I think we have enough for a load. Finish stacking these while I go get the truck.” Landon started walking back to where he’d parked the truck earlier.
I watched him walk away, unable to keep my eyes off of him.
What is wrong with me? I would rip this boy to shreds and never look back if he kept hanging around me. It was what I did. I destroyed everything I touched.
I pulled my eyes away from him long enough to walk to the next bale. Just as I reached for it, I heard my phone make a noise in my pocket. Confused, I pulled it out to see a text had popped up on the screen. My eyes widened when I noticed that I had one bar of service. Holy shit!
The text was from Joel, and it had been sent sometime late last night.
Joel: I mis u bby. My bed cold. Com her.
I raised an eyebrow. It was obvious that he’d been drinking when he sent it. I pulled my gloves off and typed back a quick response, praying it would send.
Me: I miss you, too. God, it’s hell here. I have no cell service either. I’m on a hill, so apparently, I’m high enough to get it right now. I wish you were here. I just want to come home to you.
I sent that and waited for a reply. I sighed when nothing came through.
Me: I’ll probably lose service again, but I wanted to tell you that I love you. I’m hoping that they’ll let me go into town soon. If they do, I’ll find some way to let you know when and where. Love you.
I waited again, praying that he would respond, but he never did. I sighed in defeat and shoved my phone back in my pocket when I saw Landon driving the truck toward me. I waited as he pulled up next to me and shut the truck off.
“You hand them to me, and I’ll stack them until they get too high for you to throw up. Then, we’ll switch.”
I nodded as I grabbed a bale and handed it to him. He started stacking the truck first, shoving the bales in tightly after I handed them to him. Once we had this stack loaded, he pulled up to the next. He filled the back of the truck up and then started on the trailer. I watched in fascination as he twisted and turned the bales, so they fit perfectly into rows. We filled up the bottom of the trailer and then started another row. Halfway down the field, I couldn’t throw the bales up high enough.
“Give me your hand, and I’ll help you up,” Landon said as he reached down.
I grabbed his hand, and he pulled me up like I weighed nothing. After explaining to me how to stack the rest of the bales, he jumped down and started throwing them up to me.
I was in awe of him. There was no use in denying it. This guy was strong, and it wasn’t from going to the gym. It was from working out in the hot sun day after day.
We finished loading the bales. I looked down at the ground, gulping as I did so. It was so damn far away. I had no clue how I was supposed to get down, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to ride up here on the way back to the house.
“You can get down now,” Landon said as he tied two ropes to the frame of the trailer.
“Um…how?” I asked.
“Just climb down the bales.”
He’d made it sound like the simplest thing in the world, but it wasn’t. I wasn’t good at this farm stuff, unlike him. He’d probably just jump down if he were stuck up here.
“There is no way I’m going to climb down,” I said.
“Come on. I’m standing below you in case you fall.” He stared up at me expectantly.
“Promise you won’t let me fall to my death?” I asked.
He rolled his eyes. “I swear.”
I turned and slowly climbed over the bales in the back. My palms were sweating so bad that I nearly lost my grip before I even started. I pulled my gloves off and threw them down to the ground before trying again.
“You’re good. Now, just climb down. I always stack the bales so that they’re easy to climb down.”
“Easy for you,” I muttered as I further lowered my body down the bales. My foot found a spot to stand on as I reached for the strings on another bale. I smiled. I had this.
The next thing I knew, my hand was slipping off the rope, and I went falling backward. I didn’t even have time to scream before I hit something hard. I waited for the pain, but besides my sunburned shoulders, there was none. I opened my eyes and stared up at Landon. He’d caught me.
“Holy shit, City. Clumsy much?”
My mouth opened and closed, but no words came out. My heart was beating so fast that I thought it might beat out of my chest. I hated it. I hated feeling scared.
He cradled me in his arms for a second longer before setting me down on the ground. “You okay?”
I nodded. “Yeah, thank you. That scared the crap out of me.”
“Remind me to bring a ladder for you next time,” he joked.
“Shut up.” I flipped him off, grabbed my gloves off the ground, and walked back to the front of the truck.
As soon as we were both in, he started the truck and headed back down the road. I stuck my head out the window, trying to cool off, as he drove. If I’d thought I was hot yesterday, I was wrong. It hadn’t even come close to how I felt today. Landon tapped his fingers on the steering wheel as we approached the barn.
“Stop that. It’s annoying,” I grumbled.
He shot a grin my way as he continued to tap away. “Deal with it.”
I ignored him as he pulled up to the barn and slowly backed into it. Once the trailer was partially inside, he shut the truck off.
“Come on, City. Let’s get this over with.”
It took us almost two hours to get the truck and trailer unloaded and the hay stacked in the barn, but we did it. I dropped to my knees in the grass and threw my gloves down beside me.
God bless it. My shoulders were on fire. I was on fire. My happy ass wasn’t cut out for the farm life.
I tried to lift my arm to push my bangs away from my face, but I couldn’t do it. Both of my arms were shaking, and they felt like jelly. I was pretty sure that if I tried to stand up right now, my legs wouldn’t hold my weight. So, I just went with gravity and fell the rest of the way down onto the grass.
“You gonna make it, City?”
I raised one hand in the air to flip him off again. “Stop calling me that.”
I looked up to see him standing above me with a worried look on his face.
“Your
shoulders look like shit.”
“They feel like someone took a blowtorch to them.”
“Did you put sunblock on them today?” he asked.
I shook my head. “I forgot.”
“You’re an idiot. Get up.”
“I don’t wanna,” I whined.
Nothing short of a promise from my grandma that I could go home would make me get up.
“Get your skinny ass up, and come with me,” Landon said, sounding annoyed.
“Fuck off.”
I heard him grumbling under his breath. Then, I was suddenly scooped up. I squealed, shocked by the sudden movement.
I shoved at his chest. “Put me down!”
“Nope. I tried to be nice about it, but you’re being stubborn as usual.”
He started walking away from the barn but in the opposite direction of the house.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“My place. It’s closer to here than the main house, and I have something that will help you.”
“I’m fine, Landon. Seriously, put me down.”
For one, I hated being carried around like a little kid, and two, I couldn’t even imagine how he was holding me after unloading the hay. My arms were barely functioning.
He ignored me as he cut down a hill. I grumbled as he carried me, but I didn’t fight anymore. I didn’t have it in me. A few minutes later, we approached the front of a single-story house. With the exception of that, it looked similar to my grandparent’s house. Landon didn’t stop until we were inside. He set me down and motioned for me to follow him. It wasn’t like I had much of a choice now that I was here. I followed him into a bathroom. I took a seat on the edge of the tub as he rummaged through a medicine cabinet.
“What are you looking for?” I asked.
“Aloe vera. It works like a charm on sunburns.” He pulled a container of green goo out.
“Ew…that looks nasty.”
“It’ll help. Trust me.”
I reached for the goo, scrunching my nose. I hoped it smelled better than it looked. I opened it and squeezed some on my fingers. I had to admit that it did smell pretty good. I rubbed some of it on the tops of my shoulders and sighed in relief. Its effects were almost instant. My shoulders already felt cooler than they had a second ago.
“Holy crap. Thank you,” I said as I handed the container back to him.
“You’re welcome. Turn around, and I’ll put it on where you can’t reach on your back.”
I studied him for a moment before turning away. “I think you’re probably the nicest person I’ve ever met.”
He snorted. “I doubt that.”
I shook my head. “No, you really are.”
“Thanks, I guess. I used to be an asshole back in high school, but I finally figured out that it wasn’t going to get me anywhere. We’re only on this earth for a while. Might as well make the best of it.”
“How old are you, Landon?”
“Nineteen. Why do you ask?”
“Because you don’t act like you’re nineteen.”
I shivered when I felt his hand against my back as he put the goo on me.
“I grew up fast.” He paused. “I’m going to move your shirt straps. Is that okay?”
I nodded, but my stomach dropped. “Sure.”
I didn’t move a muscle as I felt his fingers slip under my bra strap and my shirt strap before he pushed them down my arms. It felt intimate to me, too intimate.
“Why do you say that?” I asked, trying to distract myself.
“Say what?”
His voice was deeper than before, and it sent shivers down my spine.
Why does he get to me like this?
“That you grew up fast,” I said.
I jumped when I felt him rubbing the goo on me.
“I already told you I was an asshole through most of high school. I thought I owned the whole damn world. Boy, was I wrong. My mom got sick, really sick, at the beginning of my junior year. She was fine one day, and the next, she was in a hospital bed, barely hanging on.”
I swallowed hard. “God, Landon, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. You didn’t give her cancer. She was gone within two weeks. Just…gone. It hurt so damn much to watch the one person who loved me regardless of what I did wither away.”
He was still rubbing my back, but I wasn’t sure if he was even aware of it. I closed my eyes as tears filled them.
The pain was evident in his voice as he continued to speak, “After that, I straightened up, and I stopped acting like a jackass. I figured out just how hard the world could fuck you. I wasn’t invincible like I’d thought I was.”
“You’re pretty damn close to it.” I turned to see him staring at me.
“Why do you say that?”
“Over the past two days, I’ve watched you lift things that no human should be able to lift. I’m starting to think you’re Superman.”
He smiled, but his eyes were still sad. “I’m not Superman, not even close. I’m just trying to be the guy my mom always told me I could be.”
Damn if this doesn’t hurt. I didn’t understand why I cared that he was hurting, but I did. Maybe it was because I knew deep down that Landon was one of the good guys.
“I think she’d be proud of you, especially for putting up with me.” I said, trying to lighten the mood.
“You’re not so bad. I think you have a lot of shit going on in your head and a chip on your shoulder, but you’re not a bad person. Under all the piercings and hair and shit, I think you’re a kind person. You just took the wrong road.”
My breath caught as he lifted his hand and ran it down my cheek.
“There’s something in your eyes begging to get out, but you keep it locked up. You’ve got to let it out, City. Just let it go.”
I jumped to my feet, and his hand dropped back down to his side.
“We finished?”
He nodded as he looked away. “Yeah, we’re good. Let me get you one of my shirts to wear while we’re out in the field. You need to keep the sun off of you for a while.”
He was gone after that, only to return a minute later with a shirt in his hand. He left me alone to change. I peeled my shirt off and threw it in a hamper next to the door before pulling his over my head.
My stomach was in knots, and my heart was racing. What just happened? Why am I feeling like this all of a sudden? I didn’t want anything to do with Landon. I had Joel, and that was all that mattered.
I took a deep breath before opening the door and walking back out to meet Landon.
Whatever was happening, I wouldn’t let it.
The rest of the week went much like the first two days. We spent Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday out in the hayfield, loading hay and then stacking it in the barn. I stopped complaining and just went with it. There was no point in whining. All that did was annoy myself and probably Landon, too—not that he ever said so.
Joel had never texted me back, not even once, and I had service the entire time we were in the field. I tried not to let it bother me, but it did. It was like he didn’t even care that I was gone. All of the doubt I’d felt before seeing him the night I left came back with a vengeance. I kept picturing him with other women.
And then, there was Landon. He was constantly around, and my eyes were always on him. It was like they had a mind of their own. He’d never mentioned that day in his bathroom, and neither had I. I didn’t even want to think about it. I tried to keep my distance as much as possible.
“Alexandria, I know I told you I’d take you to town to get stuff, but I don’t think I can for another week or two. I’ve got a bunch of stuff going on all next week and the one after,” my grandma said as we were eating lunch Friday afternoon.
Landon and I had just finished up with the hay, and I could barely move, let alone think about a shopping trip.
I shrugged. “I’m getting used to wearing the mud boots all the time. It’s not a big deal.”
She sighed. “Yes
, it is. You need boots and clothes. You can’t keep wearing the same clothes all the time. They’re going get worn out.”
“I have my license. I could go by myself,” I suggested.
My grandfather sent a glare my way. “You’re not going anywhere by yourself. You’d probably steal my car and take off.”
“I would not,” I grumbled even though the thought had crossed my mind. I needed to see Joel. I had to know why he wasn’t answering me.
“No.” His voice told me that I wasn’t going to change his mind.
“I could take her tonight after the chores are done,” Landon spoke up.
My head snapped up to see him looking at my grandfather. After the last few days of me ignoring him, I had no idea why he was offering.
“You don’t have to do that, Landon. You’ve worked your ass off this week in the hay. Take the weekend off, and go have some fun.”
“With all due respect, sir, she’s worked just as hard as I have this week, and she hasn’t caused any trouble. I could take her to New Martinsville and watch her.”
I looked at my grandfather to see him staring back at me. Hope rose in my chest when I saw that he was debating. I looked away as I pretended to act like I didn’t care.
“Alexandria, if I let you go with him and he tells me that you did anything wrong, you will not leave this farm for the rest of the summer.”
I nodded. “I won’t try anything, I swear.”
It kind of sucked that he didn’t trust me at all. Sure, I wasn’t here for a vacation, but I’d been on my best behavior since I arrived. He could at least give me a chance.
“Landon, if you’re willing to put up with her, she’s your responsibility. If she does anything wrong, it’s on you,” my grandfather said.
Landon glanced at me. “I know. I don’t think she’ll cause me any trouble.”
He was right. I wouldn’t do anything that would get him into trouble, not after he’d helped me so much.
“All right then. Landon, you’re in charge of her.”
I couldn’t help but grin. I’m free! At least, I would be free in a few hours.
Breaking Alexandria Page 9