Foreign Affairs

by Patricia Scanlan

  Ronan was always cool towards Brenda now. They’d been invited to dinner in Brenda and Shay’s new house a week ago. Brenda made a spaghetti bolognese and served a side salad and garlic bread. It was very tasty and they all enjoyed it. But then she’d turned around after dinner and told Jennifer to make the coffee because she’d been killing herself all afternoon preparing and cooking the meal.

  ‘Sure,’ Jennifer agreed. ‘Go in and sit down, I’ll bring it in to you.’ Shay had gone into the sitting-room to relax as well, leaving Jennifer and Ronan staring at each other over a table full of dirty dishes.

  ‘We’re going home,’ Ronan said furiously. ‘You don’t ask someone to dinner and then turn around and tell them to make the coffee. That girl is pig-ignorant and dead lazy and he’s not much better. She obviously expects us to do the washing-up too. By God I’m going to tell her where to get off. She’s not going to treat you like that, Jenny! Big deal, so she made a dinner. What did she invite us for if it was going to be such a hardship?’ He stood up, a ferocious scowl replacing his normally cheerful expression.

  ‘Please, Ronan, don’t say anything. Please don’t start a row,’ Jennifer pleaded.

  ‘Jennifer, she treats you like a bloody little servant. Do this, Jenny. Do that, Jenny. Make the coffee, Jenny. It’s not on. She’s not going to treat you like that when I’m around. I won’t have it.’

  ‘You sound exactly like your father,’ Jennifer hissed furiously. ‘Don’t say, “I won’t have it,” to me.’

  ‘That’s a nice thing to say, I don’t think.’ Ronan was furious. ‘I’m only thinking of you.’

  ‘Sshh! Keep your voice down, Ronan,’ Jennifer muttered.

  ‘Why? Are you afraid the Prima Donna might get upset? Fuck the Prima Donna!’

  ‘Ronan!’ Jennifer remonstrated. ‘Don’t use language like that.’

  ‘Well she’d drive anyone to bad language.’

  ‘Your family’s not perfect either. Your father could do with a lesson in manners,’ she snapped.

  ‘There’s no need for that. You’re being childish,’ Ronan retorted.

  ‘Well if you’re going to criticize my family, I’ll feel free to do the same with yours.’

  ‘That is childish.’

  ‘Oh, shut up!’

  They glared at each other.

  ‘Are we going or staying?’ Jennifer asked miserably, furious with her sister for behaving in such a rude fashion and putting her in this position.

  ‘We’re going,’ Ronan declared. She followed him to the kitchen door. He stopped short and turned around. ‘I didn’t think you’d come,’ he said.

  Jennifer shrugged. ‘We were invited as a couple, we’ll leave as a couple. Just because she’s my sister doesn’t mean I have to approve of her behaviour,’ she said despondently.

  Ronan put his arms around her. ‘Come on.’ He gave a wry smile. ‘We’ll do the washing-up and make the bloody coffee and we’ll know better than to accept an invitation to dinner the next time.’

  ‘I love you, Ronan Stapleton.’ Jennifer rested her head against his shoulder.

  ‘I love you too.’ He hugged her. ‘It’s not your fault you’ve got her nibs as a sister.’

  Jennifer frowned at the memory of the disastrous dinner party as she washed up the cups and set the boxes neatly under the sink.

  Keeping Ronan and Brenda from having a humdinger of a row was not going to be easy.

  Chapter Seventy

  ‘Aaah! Oh God. Oh God! GOODDDD!’ Brenda yelled.

  ‘I don’t feel too good,’ Shay mumbled, ashen-faced. His knees gave way and he fell in a dead faint.

  ‘For heaven’s sake,’ the midwife said irritably.’ Get him out of here. Mrs Hanley, breathe like you were taught at your classes.’

  ‘I’m dying,’ moaned Brenda. ‘And he faints! I’m the one in agony and he passes out. Oooohhhh. Please. Please give me something.’

  ‘Push, Mrs Hanley.’

  ‘I am pushing,’ she groaned and burst into tears. This was the worst moment of her entire life. If she’d had the slightest notion that childbirth was going to be this bad, she’d have made Shay wear a dozen condoms and she’d have taken double the amount of contraceptive pills. This was a nightmare beyond her worst dreams. It was bad enough being sick morning, noon and night for the first three months. It was mega-awful putting on three stone and not being able to see her feet. But it all paled into insignificance compared to this torture.

  ‘Push harder, Mrs Hanley. The head’s almost through,’ the detested voice of her tormentor instructed. I hate you. I hate you, you inhuman sadist. Bugs Bunny Powers is a saint compared to you, Brenda thought savagely as she gritted her teeth and pushed as hard as she could.

  ‘Once more, there’s a good girl,’ the midwife approved. Brenda gave a loud yell, pushed as hard as she could and sagged back against the pillows covered in perspiration as she heard a whimper and then a lusty cry.

  ‘Congratulations, Mrs Hanley. You’ve a lovely baby girl,’ she heard the midwife say.

  ‘Never again, never ever again,’ Brenda muttered to herself as she fought down waves of nausea. The nurse placed the baby in her arms. Brenda looked at the scrunched-up wizened little red face. She’s not very pretty, she thought despondently, trying desperately to summon up some maternal feelings.

  You’re a disaster as a mother already, she reproached herself. She started to cry. Why couldn’t Shay be here with her? Kenny had been with Kathy for her two births and they both said it was an incredibly moving experience. That was what most people said about childbirth. But she hadn’t felt that it was a wonderful moving experience. How could anyone say that lying with your legs parted and your feet in stirrups as you pushed and panted was wonderful? Childbirth had been the most horrible, painful, humiliating experience of her life. And now she couldn’t even bond with her baby. She was obviously a most abnormal mother. The thought made Brenda cry harder. The nurse took the baby from her. ‘It’s all right, Mrs Hanley, it’s just reaction and you’re exhausted. We’ll stitch you up and send you back to the ward. You can have a sleep and you’ll be fine.’

  Stitches! Brenda thought in horror. God, would the nightmare never end?

  The nurse was right, Brenda thought with relief the following morning. She’d slept the rest of the night through and she was dying to see her baby when she woke up. Relief flooded through her. She wasn’t abnormal at all. It had been a fearful thought. Brenda cuddled the baby to her. She didn’t look as red and puckered as she’d been before and when she opened her blue eyes Brenda thought she was the most beautiful baby in the world. Adrenalin surged through her. The ordeal was over. The family would be arriving to offer congratulations later. And she’d never have to set foot in that depressing office again once she’d worked her notice. She was practically free at last, she thought with delight. Maybe it had all been worth it after all. Now was the start of the rest of her life. Even the pain and discomfort of her stitches could not dent Brenda’s mood of exhilaration and optimism.

  ‘Would you be able for some breakfast, Mrs Hanley?’ The nurse plumped up her pillows and straightened her sheets.

  ‘Would I what? I’d eat a horse this minute.’ Brenda laughed. ‘I’m ravenous!’

  That afternoon Brenda sat in happy anticipation of her visitors. She had successfully managed to breastfeed the baby and she felt very superior to the lady in the next bed who hadn’t managed it at all and had to resort to the bottle. She was very sore, even sitting was an agony, but she didn’t care. The ordeal was over and soon she’d be a lady of leisure.

  She put her make-up on with pleasure. She’d felt like a terrible frump in the last six weeks especially. She hadn’t bothered to put make-up on or get her hair done or anything. She’d just waddled around looking like a slob. It was definitely diet time, Brenda assured herself as she brushed blusher on to her cheeks. She wanted to be thin for Jenny’s wedding. She was matron-of-honour and Paula Matthews was a bridesmaid. There was
no way she was going up the aisle looking like a dumpling, beside La Matthews, Brenda vowed.

  Shay arrived with flowers and chocolates. ‘Sorry I fainted, Bren,’ he apologized yet again. Brenda was in a mood to be magnanimous. ‘You were lucky. I’d have given anything to faint. Let’s not tell the others,’ she said.

  ‘Right,’ he agreed with relief.

  ‘What do you think of her?’ Brenda asked proudly.

  ‘She’s lovely.’ Shay smiled, peering into the little cot beside Brenda’s bed. ‘What are we going to call her?’

  ‘I like the name Savannah,’ Brenda declared. She’d been reading a romantic novel during her pregnancy and was very taken with the heroine’s name.

  ‘Savannah Hanley!’ Shay said doubtfully. ‘It’s a bit . . . unusual . . .’

  ‘How about Natalie, then?’ Natalie Wood was one of Brenda’s favourite actresses. Shay’s jaw dropped. Natalie Hanley sounded even worse than the first one.

  ‘Oh for God’s sake,’ Brenda said irritably. ‘You come up with something then. I want to have a name picked before everyone comes in to see her.’

  They hadn’t got down to a discussion of names before because Brenda had been nervous in case anything happened to the baby. She’d thought it was tempting fate to pick a name before it was born.

  ‘I like the name Joan. Or Joanne,’ Shay suggested.

  ‘Shay, how boring!’ Brenda didn’t want her child to have a boring run-of-the-mill name. Natalie and Savannah sounded exotic, very Hollywood. ‘Look, we said if it was a boy you could name him. And if it was a girl I could name her. Didn’t we?’

  ‘Well Natalie and Savannah are out,’ Shay declared, in an uncharacteristically firm tone of voice.

  Brenda pouted. ‘You didn’t have to go through the agony of having her. Stop sitting there like a dictator telling me what to do and go down to the shop and get me a couple of magazines and a can of Coke. I might as well make the most of my few days here,’ she said huffily.

  Shay sighed as he waited in the queue to pay for the magazines and Coke. Brenda was very volatile lately. No doubt it was her hormones. He’d be glad when they were back to normal again. It was hard to believe he was a father. He’d got an awful shock when Brenda told him she was pregnant shortly after they’d returned from their honeymoon.

  It wasn’t what they’d planned. He would have preferred to wait for a few years before having children. He thought she was on the pill, but she told him she must have forgotten to take it a couple of times when they were on their honeymoon. He would have liked Brenda to continue working for another year or two. It was expensive buying a house. His business needed to expand if it was to support the three of them. The only thing was, Brenda would be getting her gratuity so that would help.

  The baby was a lovely little thing. He’d been captivated by her once he’d seen her. He was dying to have a hold of her. She was so tiny. And he loved her little mop of black hair. Poor old Brenda, she’d had a hard time of it all the same. He wouldn’t say anything else about the names. He’d be able to name his son, whenever that happy day arrived. Shay paid for the Coke and magazines and threw in a packet of chocolate biscuits and a bunch of grapes as well. It would be nice to have her and the baby home. It was lonely in the house on his own. It reminded him of when he’d lived in a flat. It was much nicer being married than being on your own, he thought as he walked back to the ward.

  ‘Here you go, love.’ He smiled at Brenda.

  ‘Sorry for snapping,’ she apologized.

  ‘It’s all right, Bren.’ Shay leaned over and gave his wife a kiss. ‘Can I have a hold of the baby?’

  ‘Just lift her out of the cot,’ Brenda said, taking a long draught of her Coke.

  Gently, Shay leaned into the cot and picked up his daughter. She made a little face, opened her eyes briefly and looked at him and fell asleep again. He cuddled her in against his shoulder and felt as proud as Punch.

  ‘This is great, Bren.’ He beamed.

  ‘Wait until you’re faced with your first dirty nappy,’ she teased.

  ‘I don’t care,’ Shay said. ‘I’m the luckiest man in the world, I’ve got two lovely women in my life.’

  ‘Brenda, she’s absolutely gorgeous.’ Jennifer picked up her new niece and gazed at her admiringly.

  ‘Give me a go,’ Kit said.

  ‘Yes, give Gran a go,’ Brenda ordered.

  ‘Don’t you dare call me Gran,’ Kit exclaimed in horror, taking her granddaughter from Jennifer and studying her intently. ‘She’s got Shay’s nose and chin.’

  ‘I think she looks like Brenda,’ Jennifer argued.

  ‘Not at all,’ Gerard teased. ‘She looks like Grumps.’

  ‘Wash your mouth out with soap, you,’ Brenda remonstrated with her younger brother.

  ‘Only kidding, Bren,’ he joked. Brenda grinned. She was in top form and thoroughly enjoying herself. It was delightful being the centre of attention. Kathy and Beth were due in later and the girls from work had promised to visit. She felt like a queen holding court.

  ‘What are you going to call her?’ Kit asked. Brenda looked at Shay.

  ‘It’s up to you,’ he said.

  ‘Well I was thinking of Savannah or Natalie, but Shay doesn’t like those names so I’m going to call her Claudia,’ Brenda declared. ‘Claudia Emma Hanley.’

  Chapter Seventy-One

  Brenda sat with her feet up on her desk. It was her last day at work. She’d had to come back to the office to work out her notice, otherwise her maternity leave wouldn’t have been paid. She was getting a nice fat gratuity. Half of it was going towards paying off the mortgage and getting the central heating installed. The other half, she would keep for herself to buy a car. She already had it picked out. A nifty little Citroën. She’d paid the deposit on it. By the weekend she would be the proud owner of a car. She’d be able to go where she pleased and be a woman of leisure. Well not leisure exactly. Taking care of Claudia was much more demanding than she’d thought it would be. It wasn’t as bad now as it had been the first few weeks when she’d been having four-hourly feeds. Kit had been a lifesaver during those dreadful days after she’d come out of the hospital and been in such a panic, thinking she was doing everything wrong.

  Kit was taking care of Claudia while Brenda worked her notice. From next Monday morning Brenda would not have to get up at the crack of dawn and stand at a bus stop getting drenched. She’d have to get up and feed Claudia, but she could go back to bed for a little snooze afterwards. She’d got into that habit when she was on her maternity leave. It was most enjoyable.

  Bugs Bunny marched into the office. She saw Brenda sitting with her feet up on the desk. Brenda waited for the remonstration that she was sure was coming. The supervisor gave her a cold look . . . and said nothing. Brenda was disgusted. She’d been all prepared to tell Bugs to get lost. She’d been planning this day for so long. What she wasn’t going to say to Bugs Bunny. She was going to really let her have it and tell her what a sly, gawky skinny bag of bones she was. She was going to tell her she was a frustrated old spinster who shouldn’t be taking her frustrations out on the girls who worked for her. Everybody in the office was waiting for the confrontation with huge anticipation.

  Hilda Powers sat at her desk at the top of the room facing her minions. She looked at her wristwatch, and the clock on the wall. It was fifty-nine seconds to nine. She waited for the second.

  ‘Begin,’ she ordered.

  Brenda leaned down and drew a magazine out of her bag. She ignored her humming machine, a computer which was far more advanced than the huge old yoke she’d hammered on years ago. The girls cast surreptitious glances in the supervisor’s direction. Bugs Bunny stared straight ahead as if Brenda did not exist. There was a palpable air of disappointment. Bugs was obviously not going to rise to the bait. Brenda took an apple out of her bag and started to chew on it. Hilda Powers never flinched.

  Wagon, thought Brenda disappointedly. She began to read an article
about how to please your man. Dress up in sexy underwear, it advised. Ha! She gave a mental snort. She’d tried on a silky camisole top and the French knickers she wore on her honeymoon recently and had recoiled in horror at the image in the mirror. The top didn’t meet the pants any more and a big spare tyre of white flesh bulged out between the gap. She’d have to go on a diet before she could try seducing Shay in sexy underwear. She remembered once wearing suspenders and stockings and high heels for Eddie. He’d got really turned on. Brenda sighed. It wasn’t quite the same with Shay. But she didn’t mind so much now. She’d seen Eddie and his wife recently. They looked very happy. He’d given her that old attractive grin of his and congratulated her on the baby and then he was gone. To her surprise the old ache seemed to have dulled and she wasn’t even upset. Now that she had Shay and Claudia and her own house and the prospect of giving up work, she was as content as she’d ever been. It was good to let the past go.

  After she finished the magazine she picked up her library book. It was called Decade by Jacqueline Briskin and it was brilliant! Engrossed, she didn’t notice the envious looks of her colleagues or the tight-lipped stare of Miss Powers.

  They all went to the pub at lunch-time. Brenda got quite tiddly from all the drinks the girls bought her. She read her book for the rest of the afternoon and at four-thirty stood up and told the girls that she had some shopping to do and would see them later in the pub for her booze-up. She waited for Bugs Bunny to forbid her to leave. The supervisor ignored her. Brenda toyed with the idea of saying ‘Goodbye, Bugs Bunny, knowing I’ll never have to see you again is worth even more to me than my gratuity.’ But in the face of the supervisor’s silence, she thought it might be undignified. Besides, she’d know then that she’d really got to Brenda.

  Brenda took a leaf out of her supervisor’s book. She ignored Hilda. Slowly she emptied her belongings out of her drawer. She took one final look around and walked out of the hated office for the last time. She’d expected to feel exultant, but instead she felt a sense of anticlimax. She walked down to Roches Stores and treated herself to some make-up and a new angora jumper. Then she strolled back up to the Parnell Mooney, bought herself a gin and tonic, and sat waiting for the girls to arrive.