Tales From a Second Hand Wand Shop- Book 1: They Were the Best of Gnomes. They Were the Worst of Gnomes.

by Robert P. Wills

  Chapter Forty

  Wherein the First Annual Jamboree Begins!

  Grimbledung stood on the stage with Mayor Camthalion Shinn on one side and Drimblerod on the other. He looked out at the crowd in front of him. It seemed that the whole town had turned out for the event. Even a few Orcs stood head and shoulders above everyone else. Word had indeed gotten out. Here and there, he saw a Gatherers Division button on someone in the crowd- according to the agreement; they ate and drank for free.

  “Welcome to the First Annual Aution and Gatherers Division Jamboree!” Said Grimbledung to the large crowd before him. No one responded. “We’re really glad you came and I want to thank a few people before we get the festivities started.” The silence was overwhelming.

  “First to Mayor Shinn, a tribute to Elfkind if there ever was one. “This entire event is happening because of him. All him!”

  Mayor Shinn’s stomach suddenly filled with butterflies. He turned to look at the odd Gnome which now had put his reelection in danger. He took a step away and to the rear from Grimbledung.

  Grimbledung pressed on: “And of course my partner Drimblerod Axebreath!” Again, no one made a sound.

  From behind the crowd, a howl broke the silence. Everyone looked at Akita who was crouched on the roof of the massive, four-story Guilds House. The tallest in town, it housed the Midwifes, Healers and Undertakers (Local 423); Miners and Assays (Local 213); and the Scab and Blackleg Guild -which was only a guild by name of course37. Obviously.

  In any case, Akita was silhouetted in the moonlight. He let out another howl, arms splayed wide and chest out. Everyone took a step backwards towards the stage. A stampede was imminent. Akita leapt in what seemed slow motion.

  While in the air he twisted around so he was looking down when he cleared the pile of wood- which was now almost three stories tall. He made it all the way to the stage and landed with two feet and one paw right where the mayor had been standing. The stage creaked dangerously. As he stood slowly he winked and whispered to Grimbledung, “Levitation wand.” When he reached his full height, the entire crowd took a step back to their original position.

  “That’s all the talkin I want to hear from this stage! Get some music and ale flowin’ orrrrrr there’s gonna be some citations issued!” The crowd exploded into cheers as Akita hoped off the stage and made his way to the nearest Ale booth. Even with his amicable entrance, everyone got out of his way.

  The minstrel players took the stage like they were storming a keep. “Outta the way, youngsters!” Warned an olden looking Dwarf who was armed with an equally ancient fiddle. “Let the professionals work.” He drew his bow across the strings and they hissed to life. Most of the crowd looked at the Dwarf. The hiss transformed into a lively tune that was quickly accompanied by several other minstrels. Even as the crowd began to mill about, an open space appeared as an impromptu dance floor was made directly in front of the stage.

  For several hours, the minstrels played in shifts (according to union rules) and a good time was had by all. Not a fight had broken out only partially due to Akita’s prowling; the lumbering Orc Brute Squad (hired by Akita) made sure that differences were resolved peacefully. It was common knowledge that there were no innocent parties when Orcs broke up a fight. In fact, sometimes, innocent bystanders were used as weapons by them.

  “Grim,” began Drimblerod as he put down his mug, “I have to say, this is by far one of the best Jamborees I’ve been to.” Grimbledung smiled in response. “There’s plenty to drink, lots of different foods to eat, plenty of places to sit, and not a single fight. There’s even a great breeze so it doesn’t get too stale here in The Square with all these people. I can’t imagine how it could be done better.”

  Grimbledung’s smile widened, “Wait till you see the best part.” He stood and climbed onto the stage. When he got there, he drew his wand. “Hey-ho, Mister Dwarf, give me a Look- Up-Here riff.” He said to the grizzled musician.

  Still in the middle of his song, the Dwarf gave a sideways nod to Grimbledung, finished his bar, then drew his bow across the strings and created a jagged sound much like a Stone Golem battle cry. Most everyone turned to look at the stage. “Many thanks” said Grimbledung as he moved to center stage. “I just want to say thanks for coming to the First Annual Jamboree! Make sure you tell your friends about it and next year it’ll be even bigger!” He shouted. Everyone stared at him.

  “Let the Dwarf play!” Came a lone response from the back of the crowd.

  Several people clapped their approval.

  “Yes, yes! The Dwarf WILL play!” Shouted Grimbledung back as he pointed his wand at the immense pile of wood. “While we all roast our snacks!” With that he jabbed his wand at the pile. A stream of molten lava shot out of the wand in a large arc, hitting the pile near the top. It immediately burst into flames and the fire continued down as the lava dripped down. Within moments, the entire mass was ablaze. People near the inferno took a step back from the heat. Quickly the temperature in the square went up several degrees. Grimbledung turned to Drimblerod, “Woo- good thing there’s a stiff breeze.” He gave a wave to the Dwarf. “If music is the life of this jamboree, play on, good Dwarf. Play on.” he said.

  The Dwarf picked up his tune right where he left it off.