War Angel Contingent (Everlasting Fire Series, Book 1)

by S. J. West

  “You two do realize that I’m a grown woman who can take care of herself,” I say as Ethan and I make our way back to the table to join them.

  When we reach my chair, Ethan holds it out for me to sit in. No one has done that for me since Timothy, and the thought of him causes me to feel a pang of guilt for finding a reason to enjoy my life again. He’s dead because of what I did to him. Maybe I don’t deserve to feel happy or content when he’s nothing more than ash in the wind.

  “Jules,” I hear my mother say, drawing me out of my morbid reverie. From the inflection of her voice, it sounds like this isn’t the first time she’s called my name in the last few seconds to get my attention.

  “I’m sorry,” I tell her as I notice Ethan retake his seat beside me, “my mind drifted off. Did you ask me something?”

  “I was wondering what time you’re supposed to meet Anna today,” she says. The look of worry on my mother’s face is a sure indication that she recognizes something is wrong with me, but I know she won’t ask me about it until we’re alone.

  For years now, my mom has tried to convince me that I’m not responsible for Timothy’s death. A part of me wants to trust her words, but there is also a part of me that can’t let go of my guilt. If it wasn’t for me, I know Timothy would still be alive today. If I shrug the responsibility of his death from my shoulders, it will be like I am spitting in his face. He may be dead, but the memories of our last year together still haunt me. Those are the moments I try to forget by drowning them out with bottles of alcohol. I just wish I could wash them away completely with the liquid poison.

  “I assume I’ll be meeting with Anna this morning,” I say, looking over at Ethan for confirmation.

  “I told her I would bring you to her quarters right after you ate breakfast,” he tells me. “That is, if you feel up to eating.”

  I look at the food on their plates and see pancakes, eggs, bacon, and fruit.

  “I think my stomach can handle some pancakes, fruit, and three slices of bacon,” I say.

  “Coming right up then.” Ethan stands from his chair and heads into the kitchen, presumably to make me a plate of food.

  While Ethan is otherwise occupied, my mother leans in slightly across the table and asks, “What’s wrong, Jules? I know that look on your face and you’re overthinking something.”

  Sometimes, I wish my mother didn’t know me so damn well.

  “Timothy,” I reply because I don’t need to say anything more than that for her to understand what’s troubling my mind.

  “I wish you had never met that boy,” Uncle Enis says with more venom than I thought possible from him.

  “Enis,” my mother hisses in a low voice, chastising him for his remark.

  “Well, it’s true, Evelyn,” Uncle Enis replies, not showing an ounce of remorse for his remark. “It was his half-witted idea to have Jules give birth naturally up in that cabin. He didn’t even want us around when the baby was born. If you ask me …”

  “No one’s asking you,” I interrupt harshly. “Can we please just drop the subject? I don’t want to get into the same old argument we’ve been having for the past five years while Ethan is around.”

  My uncle doesn’t look pleased with my request, but he sits back in his chair and remains mute, even though I can clearly see his unending anger toward Timothy simmering just below the surface.

  When Ethan returns with my plate of food, he looks between the three of us as he sets my breakfast down in front of me and retakes his seat.

  “Did I miss something?” he asks, not being shy about letting us know he realizes things are not the way he left them just a few minutes ago.

  “Nothing important,” I tell him, picking up my fork from the plate and cutting into the stack of fluffy pancakes. Their buttery deliciousness makes me giggle as soon as they touch my tongue. “Oh my goodness, did you make these?”

  Ethan grins. “I did. I take it from the smile on your face that you like them.”

  “They’re awesome,” I say, stuffing my mouth with more because I realize how hungry I am. It shouldn’t come as any big surprise though. All I ate last night was a shrimp that almost killed me. “I’m sorry I didn’t get to try any of the fish or side dishes you made last night. I hate knowing all that food and effort went to waste because of me.”

  “It was just food,” Ethan assures me. “All of that can be replaced. You can’t.”

  “Amen to that,” Uncle Enis wholeheartedly agrees.

  “So tell me, how are Anna and the babies doing?” my mother asks Ethan. “I haven’t seen her in quite a while.”

  “Oh, that reminds me,” Ethan says. “Anna asked me to invite you all to Cirrus for a party being thrown in the twins’ honor.”

  “When is it?” my mom asks, her interest in such an event obviously piqued.

  “Tomorrow night,” Ethan tells her. “It will be a formal event held in the ballroom. Anna and Malcolm decided it was time to stop shielding the children quite so much. Although after everything that happened before and after their birth, I can’t say I blame them for wanting to keep the twins away from people.”

  Ethan looks over at me. “I was hoping we could go together, if you’re interested in attending it.”

  I swallow the pancake in my mouth as I consider his invitation, but who am I fooling? There’s only one answer to give.

  “I would love to go with you,” I tell him.

  I spy a smile grace my mother’s face. I’m not sure if it’s because I’ve agreed to go on a second date with Ethan or if it’s because we’ll need to go shopping for formal wear. More than likely, both of those reasons are causing her to feel happy.

  I eat the remainder of my meal in record time because I want to go to Cirrus as soon as possible and finally meet Empress Anna. I’ve seen a picture of her, but something so two-dimensional can’t truly give you a clear image of someone’s soul. Having already met her husband and Lucas, I can’t imagine her being anything but strong spirited, just like them.

  “Are we going to see if we can track Helena down after my meeting with the empress?” I ask Ethan.

  He nods. “That was my plan, if you don’t have something else to do today.”

  “Considering how much money your empress is about to give me,” I say, standing from my chair, “I’m pretty much at your beck and call until the situation with Helena is resolved. Give me a minute to go get my jacket and the tracking device.”

  I walk into my bedroom and make a quick detour to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I definitely don’t want to meet the empress with bad breath. First impressions are always important, at least that’s what my mother taught me.

  After I’m through in the bathroom, I grab my black jacket and the tracking device, which I tuck safely into one of the jacket’s pockets. When I walk back out into the living room, I notice that Uncle Enis and my mom are already gone.

  “They left without saying good-bye?” I say out loud, finding it curious that they would do such a thing. Normally, I have to practically push them out the door to make them leave after a visit.

  “I asked them if I could have a private moment with you before we go to Cirrus,” Ethan tells me, looking slightly uncomfortable, as if what he has to say isn’t easy for him to put into words.

  I walk up to him and ask, “Is something wrong? You look fidgety. Did Uncle Enis say something to you? That man does not know when, or maybe it’s just how, to mind his own business.”

  Ethan grins and shakes his head slightly. “No. It’s nothing either of them said or did. I just wanted to apologize about last night again. It should have occurred to me that you might not be able to eat the food. It was the first time you had ever had it, and I should have been better prepared for anything to happen. It all took me by surprise when it shouldn’t have.”

  “Listen,” I say, taking a step forward, “last night was nobody’s fault, least of all yours, and I’m fine now. Don’t keep beating yourself up about it. Seriously, let’
s just not mention it again because it depresses me too much to think about.”

  “Depresses you?” Ethan asks in confusion. “Why does it depress you?”

  I sigh exaggeratedly. “It’s depressing to know what shrimp tastes like and that I will never be able to eat it again. I might get more depressed if I keep thinking about it because I didn’t even get to taste the lobster! Do you think I would have the same reaction to it? Maybe we should try …”

  “No!” Ethan says rather adamantly. “Don’t even think about trying to eat lobster. I can assure you the same thing would happen, and my heart just can’t go through that again. I just found you. I’m not about to lose you to a shellfish fetish.”

  I have to smile at his use of the word fetish. Usually that’s a word used in a sexual context, but I suppose it can be used correctly in this instance as well. Yet that isn’t the only thing that he said that caught my attention.

  “How long have you been looking for me?” I ask, sounding as confused by his statement as I am.

  Ethan seems somewhat caught off guard by my question. I’m not even sure he realized what he said before I pointed it out to him. I can see an inner turmoil play behind his eyes on whether or not he should answer my question. He finally decides, but he doesn’t look certain about whether or not he’s making the right decision.

  “Practically since time began,” he replies.

  If it wasn’t for the earnest expression on his face, I would have thought he was being humorous, but I don’t believe he is. His words seem heartfelt, and the strength of his sincerity causes the darkest corner of my soul to welcome the light his words are offering it.

  I don’t know how to respond. I mean, when a man says something like that to you, it has to mean he at least likes you. I almost feel like a school girl who has been given the verbal equivalent of a small note by a boy she’s interested in where I’m supposed to either check the box that says “I like you too” or the one that says “Get away from me now.”

  “We should probably go,” Ethan says rather abruptly, not allowing me a chance to respond to what he said, which seems to be the point of our hasty departure. “Anna’s expecting us.”

  He holds out his right hand for me to take, and without giving it much thought, I place my hand into his. Ethan phases us, and I mentally try to prepare myself in that split second for my first meeting with the Empress of Cirrus.

  We phase into what looks like a fancy living room. Although I suppose the rich probably call it a sitting room to make it sound grander.

  When I see Empress Anna for the very first time, I instantly believe she’s a goddess from another time and place. No one can radiate such natural beauty and still be human. Then I remember that Anna is only partially human. She is a descendant of the Archangel Michael on her mother’s side, and of course her father is Lucifer, the first and most powerful Archangel ever created.

  We find her sitting on an area rug in the room, which is situated between an opulent white marble fireplace mantel and a white couch. She’s wearing a lavender dress made of material that shines in the light of day, adding to the illusion that she’s not from this world. Lucas is sitting beside her as they both play with two babies who are sitting up in front of them. As if the scene didn’t look surreal enough, I see a hellhound lying down beside Lucas with its thick white coat ablaze with yellow-orange flames, which I know are just for show, and a medium-sized orange and white coated dog sitting next to the empress.

  Empress Anna notices our presence first and bestows upon me a smile that has probably melted the hearts of many a man and woman in Cirrus. I can think of one man in particular that it has more than likely charmed quite a bit over the last year and a half of marriage.

  “Anna,” Ethan says, as she stands to her feet to greet us, “I would like to introduce you to Julia Grace.”

  Anna walks over to us and immediately holds out her hand for me to shake.

  “I’m so glad you came,” she tells me, instantly making me feel welcomed and wanted in her home. “I told Ethan that I had to meet the woman who bested Helena without her knowing it.”

  “I’m not sure if I bested her, Empress Anna. I think I just got lucky is all,” I humbly protest, even though I do appreciate the praise.

  “Oh, don’t be so modest,” she tells me. “And please, just call me Anna. The only people who use my title are acquaintances, and I would much rather count you as a friend once we get to know each other a little better. Malcolm told me that you prefer to be called Jules. Is it all right if I address you as such?”

  I nod. “Of course you can.”

  “Wonderful,” she says, continuing to smile at me. “I also heard you had a bit of a hiccup on your date with Ethan last night. Are you feeling well? You look a little pale.”

  I knew it. I knew I looked pallid this morning, and now that I’m standing next to Anna, I feel like the poor relative who’s come to visit her rich, beautiful, and charming cousin for a handout.

  “I’m much better now. Thank you for asking though.”

  “Mommy,” Lucas calls from his spot on the floor, “I think Liam needs his diaper changed. He’s smelling awfully ripe.”

  “I’ll do it, Anna,” Ethan volunteers, taking me by surprise with his offer to do something so domestic.

  When I think of War Angels, the changing of a baby’s dirty diaper doesn’t readily come to mind.

  “Thank you, Ethan,” Anna says. “I would appreciate that a great deal. It’ll give me a chance to speak with Jules in private.”

  “Uh oh,” Lucas says as he stands up from the floor and picks one of the babies up. “That means I need to leave too I guess. Come on, Ethan. We can go to the nursery so Mommy and Ms. Jules can talk.”

  “I won’t be gone long,” Ethan tells me. “I’ve become pretty good at changing a diaper over the last few months.”

  I hear Anna giggle. “Yes, he has,” she declares with a certain amount of pride in his newly acquired skill. “All of the War Angels in my personal guard are quite proficient at it now.”

  “Only because you insisted that we should be,” Ethan grumbles, even though I can tell by the small twitch of an almost smile at the corners of his mouth that he doesn’t mind helping Anna out at all with her babies.

  “Come on, Ethan!” Lucas encourages him as he makes his way down a hallway to the left of the room with the hellhound following close behind him. “Let’s get Liam clean before he starts crying. We don’t have the magic rattle anymore to stop it.”

  “I’ll be right back,” Ethan promises before following Lucas to who knows where. That’s where people generally keep supplies for their young ones.

  “Come sit with me on the sofa while they’re busy,” Anna encourages me as she walks back over to the little girl still sitting on the rug and picks her up in her arms. “They’ll probably be longer than they think. Liam may need a bath in addition to a diaper change from what I just smelled.”

  As we sit on the sofa together, Anna places the little girl on her lap, facing me. Anna’s daughter is as beautiful as her mother, but she doesn’t share the same hair color as either of her parents. When I first saw her playing with her dark haired brother, I thought her hair was blonde. Now that I can see it more clearly, it appears to be white. Her eye color doesn’t match either of her parents’ eyes. Malcolm does have blue eyes, but their daughter’s eyes practically glow with an otherworldly blue. I watch as she places the thumb of one of her hands in her mouth as she observes me. The glint of something shiny catches my eyes, and I notice the silver bracelet she’s wearing. Anna gently pulls on her daughter’s hand to make her stop sucking her thumb.

  “She has to be the cutest baby I’ve ever seen in my life,” I declare truthfully.

  Anna smiles with a mother’s pride. “I have to admit, I think Liana is too. Although I would never say that in front of my other children.”

  “It’s almost like she has a little extra something inside her that I can’t quite put my
finger on,” I say, studying Liana carefully and trying to figure out what it is that’s different about her besides her hair color and eyes.

  I notice the smile on Anna’s face slip away and a look of worry replace her happiness.

  “I’m sorry. Did I say something wrong?” I ask, feeling as though I must have stumbled across a problem with the baby that perhaps Anna didn’t want to be reminded about.

  Anna shakes her head. “It’s nothing. I try not to dwell on things that I can’t possibly change. Besides, I would love to hear how you and Ethan are getting along. I heard the two of you got off to a rocky start, but that seems to have disappeared rather quickly.”

  “Ah, I guess you heard about our first meeting from Malcolm,” I reply, feeling embarrassed about the way Ethan and I argued in front of Anna’s husband yesterday. “We’re doing a lot better now that we’ve gotten to know one another. Sometimes when you think too much like someone else, your personalities clash. But I don’t want you to worry that it will interfere with the job you’re paying me to do. We shouldn’t have any problems locating Helena if she’s on a planet that we visit. We’ve already found her once. I’m sure we’ll find her again.”

  “Can you show me how you’re tracking her?” she asks, full of eager curiosity.

  I pull out the small tracking device from my jacket pocket and hold it up to show Anna.

  “How does it work?” she asks.

  I find it a little hard to believe that Anna would care about such a thing, but I decide to go through the motions of showing her how the device functions. This could just be her way of forming a connection with me through a shared interest, and if it is, I’m grateful. I don’t have many friends. Scratch that. I have zero friends besides my mom and Uncle Enis. The ones I did have before Timothy’s death ended up abandoning me because they couldn’t handle my dark side. Good riddance to them. True friends stay with you during the happy and the sad times. They’re not supposed to turn their backs on you the moment your life starts to careen off a cliff. None of my so-called friends decided to stick around and help lift me up to the light to remind me that I was still alive.