by Shawn Lane
“No, I…not exactly.” He swallowed the heavy lump that hard formed in his throat.
“What exactly then?”
Win shook his head. “I don’t know. I, well, I did want everyone to see that I was seeing someone.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“That’s not true. Why, Win?”
Frustrated, he took a step back. “Because, then everyone could see I’m over Dean.”
“Are you?”
“Yes, hell yes. And I guess part of me wanted to show everyone that I could be with a guy as hot as you.” Win ran his hand over his face. “Guys like me don’t attract guys like you.”
Randy crossed his arms in front of his chest. “So, is that why you’re with me? Just to show off that you can get someone like me? Whatever that means.”
“No. No. Damn it, I don’t mean that. I like you, Randy. I really like you. You’re total eye candy and I can’t deny that, but you’re sweet and funny and a great guy.”
“And what about that Dean guy? Do you still love him?” Randy asked.
“I don’t know that I ever loved him,” Win said. “He’s just the type of guy I’m supposed to like. According to everyone. Do you know why I bought you that drink three years ago in that bar?”
Randy shook his head.
“Because you were the kind of guy I really wanted. The guy I was so fucking turned on by. I dreamed of being with that guy since I was a kid and first realized I was gay. I don’t want someone like me. I want someone like you.”
And then to Win’s surprise, Randy smiled. A sweet, curl your toes kind of smile. “Okay. Then, can we get out of here?”
Win’s chest eased a bit. “Hell, yeah. Anywhere you want to go.”
“You aren’t going to get in trouble for leaving?”
Win shrugged. “Maybe, maybe not. Who cares? I was going to skip it anyway. I hate work parties.”
Randy gave him the smile again and this time kissed him quick before he opened the passenger door of the car and got in.
* * * *
The following weekend, Winn and Randy were having dinner at Molly’s house. Gran was there, too. Molly had decided to make a gooey cheesy broccoli casserole.
Win had decided to have a glass of white wine this time, while Randy had opted for water, this time seltzer water.
“This is quite tasty, Molly,” Win told her.
Emma smiled. “Winnie’s right. But I’ve had it before.”
“Thank you. It’s nothing fancy.” Molly beamed. “More?”
“I’ll have a little,” Win said.
As she spooned out more on his plate, she turned to her grandson. “How about you, sweetheart?”
Randy patted his stomach. “I’m getting fat since coming back home. I’ve gotta maintain by dancer’s physique.”
She chuckled. “Speaking of, have you told Win the good news?”
“Good news?” Win asked.
“Well—”
“Randy has an audition for a show,” Molly said, obvious pride in her tone.
“Oh.” Win grinned. “That is good news. Great in fact.”
Randy shot his grandmother a look, but she didn’t look in his direction. “Thanks, I’m pretty excited.”
“What’s the show?” Gran asked.
“It’s in Las Vegas.”
Win turned his head sharply to gape at Randy. “Vegas?”
Randy smiled sheepishly. “Yeah, it’s a new show with a pretty well-known choreographer that’s going to premiere at one of the big casinos in the spring. I met a friend of the choreographer who got me a personal audition.”
“That’s splendid. Isn’t it, Winnie?” Gram turned to him with a smile.
He forced a smile. “It certainly is. I’ll clear the table.” He rose, picked up several plates, and headed into the kitchen.
Once inside the kitchen, he set the plates in the kitchen and bowed his head. Okay, well, he knew Randy wanted to dance professionally. That was Randy’s dream. Why the hell should he be surprised? Win guessed he’d hoped for a show in LA or something.
“Hey.”
He lifted his head and turned to find Randy standing in the kitchen very close to him. “Hi.”
“Listen, I’m sorry about that. I didn’t know she was going to blab it at the dinner table.”
He nodded. “Yeah.” Win didn’t really know what to say that wouldn’t make him sound like some desperate, pathetic sap.
Randy took a step until he was almost in Win’s space. “I was going to tell you.”
“Okay. When?”
“Tonight. I only got word today that the audition was a go.”
“Did you know it was a possibility before?”
Randy bit his lip. “Yeah.”
“I see.”
“Win, I kept wanting to tell you about it, but things have been going so well between us, I didn’t want to say or do anything to change that. Remember what you said to me last week? Well, same goes for me. I really like you.”
He swallowed down his pain and wrapped his arms around Randy to draw him close. “I’m sorry. I’m behaving like a selfish jerk. I really am happy for you getting the audition.”
“Yeah?”
“Of course. I know how important it is to you.”
“It is.” Randy held him tight. “Who knows, I might not even get it.”
Win shook his head. “You will. So, when is the audition?”
“A couple of weeks, the twenty-first.”
He pulled back enough just to lift Randy’s chin. He sealed Randy’s pouty lips with his, putting as much of his real feelings into that kiss as he possibly could.
When the kiss broke, Randy smiled at him. “Let’s forget about if for now and just spend as much time together as we can.”
He returned the smile. “Now that sounds like a plan. What do you have in mind?”
“Well, what do you think?” Randy leered at him.
Win laughed. “In case you forgot, there happens to be a couple of elderly women in the dining room.”
Randy sighed. “Oh, yeah. And Grandma did say something about the four of us playing Trivial Pursuit. Fuck. I seriously suck at that game.”
“I don’t,” Win bragged. “I pretty much always win. I think it goes with the name.”
“Oh, Lord save me.” Randy rolled his eyes. “Hmm, Grandma is pretty good. Maybe we can play teams or something.”
“Gran and I will still kick your ass.”
“You can try.”
Win kissed him. “First I’ll whip your ass and then I’ll fuck it.”
Randy grinned. “The evening is looking up.”
* * * *
“Relax, they’ll love you,” Randy assured Win as they waited in the lobby of a downtown hotel that served a swanky champagne brunch.
“I’m relaxed,” Win said.
Randy glanced down at Win’s twisted hands. “Really? Your hands are strangling each other, babe.”
Win unclenched his hands and let them fall to his sides even as his heart pounded a little harder at the endearment flowing freely from Randy’s lips.
They were meeting some dancer friends of Randy’s that he himself hadn’t seen since he’d left California three years before. According to Randy, they were former dancers and had taught him a lot of what he’d learned.
Not only were these people Randy obviously admired and respected, they were the first friends of Randy’s he’d be meeting. Wasn’t there some significance when meeting family and friends?
“Here they come.”
Walking toward them was an older couple, a man and a woman, of Latino heritage. They were both dressed casually and she had her long dark hair pulled back into a ponytail. To Win they appeared to be walking on their tiptoes.
“Randy,” the woman exclaimed as she reached them, enveloping Randy into a hug. “My dearest boy. Let me kiss you all over.”
“Sophia, leave him be,” the man said, but he was grinning.
Sophia offered her hand to Win, long graceful fingers grasped his. “What an usual name.”
“It’s short for Winston.”
“Ah, like the politician.” She nodded, smiling. “Randy has been telling us all about you.”
Win felt his face heat. “Oh?”
She laughed. “Oh, look, he’s a blusher. So cute, Randy.”
“Don’t I know it?” Randy looped his arm through Win’s. “Shall we have brunch?”
They went inside and Sophia and Roberto paid for all their brunches over Randy and Win’s protests.
Roberto waved away their objections as he handed the cashier his credit card. “We are just delighted to get to see you.”
Once they got settled with their food, Sophia stabbed a fork into a helping of fried potatoes. She smiled. “It’s so nice to be able to eat.”
Randy snorted.
“You see when you are dancing, like him,” she said with a shrug of her shoulder at Randy, “you cannot eat. Look what he has on his plate. Nothing.”
Win glanced at Randy’s plate and noticed a little bit of salad and fruit mostly.
“Now, that I am happily retired I can eat whatever I want.”
“Except for what the doctor tells you not to eat,” Roberto said.
She rolled her eyes. “Doctors.”
“Broadway not so good, huh?” Roberto asked.
Randy shrugged, though Win knew it mattered to him more than he let on. “Not so good for me anyway.”
Roberto nodded his sympathy. “Many years ago, when I first came here from Cuba, I went to New York. Same for me. I did a few shows, chorus lines, but never did get any leads.”
“Yeah.” Randy poked at a hunk of cantaloupe.
“What do they know? You are a wonderful dancer.” Sophia patted his arm.
Win cleared his throat. “He does have an audition.”
“Oh?” Her dark eyes lit up. “Where? For what?”
“A show in Las Vegas at The Roman casino,” Randy said. “With Abner Howarth.”
“Howarth?” Sophia clapped her hands. “You are so lucky to work with him.”
Randy grinned. “I know. I just hope I do well enough for him to choose me.”
Win sipped his coffee as the three of them chatted on about dancing and choreographers. It was completely meaningless to him, of course, except that it meant a lot to Randy, so he didn’t mind.
By the time they left the brunch, they’d been at the table talking for three hours.
Randy grabbed his hand after he hugged Sophia and Roberto goodbye. “Sorry about that, Win. We got a little carried away.”
“I didn’t mind.”
Randy glanced at him sideways. “Are you sure? You didn’t feel excluded while we were talking?”
“Not at all. I was enjoying it.”
“I doubt that.” Randy chuckled. “We can do whatever you want now, though.”
“Whatever I want, huh?” They walked into the hotel’s underground parking lot where they’d left Win’s car.
“Yep. And I personally wouldn’t mind if it meant we’d both be naked.”
Win rolled his eyes. “You have a one track mind.”
“Yeah, maybe.” Randy pouted as they found Win’s car and he clicked the unlock on his keychain. “Well, what do you want to do then?”
“I was thinking either go-karts—”
“Go what?”
“Go-karts, the little cars.”
Randy’s jaw dropped open and he stared at Win like the alien had just popped out of Win’s chest. “Dude, I don’t even drive regular cars very well.”
He laughed. “Or bowling.”
Randy’s expression did not change. “Bowling? Did you just say bowling?”
“Okay, then, what do you want to do?”
“I told you we could do whatever you want.”
“And I said—” They got in the car and Win started it.
“Anything but bowling or-or-karting.”
Win shook his head, smiling. “You’re nuts.”
“A little, perhaps.” Randy smiled back. “But you like me.”
“A little perhaps,” he parroted. “How about the movies then?”
“Sounds great.”
Chapter 7
Randy shoved clothes into his overnight bag, aware that Win leaned against his bedroom wall watching him through hooded eyes.
“You don’t have to take me to the airport, you know? I can call a shuttle.”
Win shook his head. “No. I want to see you off.”
His audition was tomorrow morning, but Randy’s flight left in a few hours. The last two weeks had flown by and he and Win had been pretty much inseparable in that time. It was almost a relief to be leaving for a couple days.
Not because he hadn’t been happy to spend time with Win. The sex seemed to get better between them each day, more intense. And that was kind of why Randy welcomed getting away. He really liked Win. A lot. Might even be heading in the direction of that other word that began with an L. Which freaked him out some. More than some. Randy had never had a serious relationship and he’d liked it that way. Win had been making him rethink just about everything.
Except his desire to dance. To perform. That hadn’t changed and that was exactly why he was going to Las Vegas in just a few hours.
“What time does your flight return tomorrow night?”
Randy zipped up his bag. “I can take the bus.”
Win stared at him, his expression blank, but Randy saw the emotions churning in Win’s eyes. “Is there some reason you don’t want me to pick you up?”
“I just don’t want to be a bother.”
“You’re not.”
“All right. Well, it comes in just before nine tomorrow night.”
“I’ll be there,” Win said. “You hungry? Want to stop somewhere?”
He really wasn’t. His stomach was twisted into a million knots. Some related to his audition and some related to his growing feelings for Win, and they were all clashing together.
“No. But we can stop if you are.”
Win came away from the wall and wrapped his arms around Randy, pulling him close. “You nervous?”
He laughed against Win’s chest. “Does it show?”
“Some.”
“I’m always nervous, you know. It’s funny, I’ve been dancing since I was a toddler, almost, but the nerves never entirely go away. Plus, it’s like there’s so much riding on this.”
Win’s arms tightened. “Hey, if this doesn’t work out, you’ll get other auditions.”
Randy supposed. But how many times could he be told he wasn’t right for the part before the pain of rejection was too much? “Yeah. You’re right.”
He titled his head up and pressed his lips to Win’s. For several long minutes they kissed, tongues swirling, tangling. He fisted the collar of Win’s buttoned-down shirt, trying to get somehow closer, though he was already practically crawling up Win’s body.
Randy’s cock decided to rise, pressing against the zipper of his jeans. Too bad they didn’t have enough time to fuck one last time before they had to leave. It would be nice to take the edge off.
Win’s hand lowered to squeeze Randy’s prominent bulge, sending jolts of pure lust through him. He gasped against Win’s mouth.
“Fuck, what are you doing to me?”
A laugh rumbled Win’s chest. “If you don’t know, maybe I’m doing it wrong.” He slid the zipper down and reached inside to pull Randy’s cock through the opening.
“Win, I don’t think—”
“I’ll be quick,” Win promised against his lips, before once more slipping his tongue into Randy’s mouth.
He closed his fist around the tip of Randy’s cock, sliding down the shaft rather roughly, but Randy was glad for it. He added his hand to Win’s a
nd they both jerked him hard and fast. The intensity of their kiss increased and with his free hand he clung to Win’s shoulder, holding him close.
“Come on, babe,” Win broke the kiss to briefly urge.
“Uhh.” Cum spurted out over Win’s fingers. “Ah, fuck, Win.”
Win kissed him once more. “Let me get a cloth to clean you.” He disappeared into the bathroom and came back a few moments later. He knelt in front of Randy and first wiped Randy’s flaccid cock clean, then wiped his sneaker where apparently some cum had landed.
“What about you?” Randy asked as Win stood.
Win smiled. “Catch me when you return. Ready?”
An unexpected lump formed in his throat. When had he become such a sap? Randy turned and reached for his bag that he’d left on the bed. “I’m ready.”
* * * *
Randy was mostly silent on the way to the Burbank Airport, only murmuring occasional comments, and so Win followed his lead and didn’t say much either.
Unfortunately this left Win some time to brood. He couldn’t help but wonder if this was the beginning of the end for them. In all likelihood, if Randy got the job it would be.
Oh, sure, he could drive up to Vegas for a few weekends in a row or maybe twice a month, probably eventually drop to once a month. And then what? Once every three, then once every six? Eventually it wouldn’t be enough time for either of them. Hell, even every weekend wouldn’t be enough for Win. He wanted a boyfriend who would be there for him.
Which made him realize he had begun to think of Randy as his boyfriend. He wasn’t really sure when he had ceased to be the guy he was fucking or the guy he was seeing. No, Randy was his boyfriend. For now.
Funny how he’d finally found someone he was falling in love with and the guy was probably moving hundreds of miles away. Life sucked sometimes.
He couldn’t see Randy off at the gate, but Win parked in the short-term parking lot and walked with him to the check-in kiosks.
Randy turned from the kiosk, printed boarding pass in hand. “Well, I guess this is it.”
“Yeah.” Win wished he could come up with something brilliant and perhaps poignant to say, but instead he sounded stupid. He really wanted to pull Randy into his arms and kiss him, but he wasn’t much for public displays and they weren’t always wise, even in Los Angeles.