Shaedes of Gray: A Shaede Assassin Novel

by amanda bonilla

  Tick—three, tick—two, tick—one . . . the sun dipped into the west. My knees buckled beneath me as the rush of change to the gray hour swelled in my body, filling me with a dizzy, drunken sensation. The earth seemed to slant beneath my feet, and my head spun. I slipped from Xander’s grasp like wind through a net and he jumped back, shock showing on his strong and handsome face.

  No longer light or dark, the scope of my evolved abilities became obvious to me now. I was not restrained by anything. Time did not matter. The sun, moon; the absence and presence of both swayed me. No longer a slave to my corporeal form at any hour, I had become one with those hours. I had, in essence, become time.

  “What’s happened to you?” Xander asked.

  I didn’t have time to give him a sufficient answer, because Tyler’s bear cry tore through the air, stealing the breath from my lungs.

  Delilah had to take a backseat to a more important crisis. The Shaede army was making short work of the Lyhtans, whose power had diminished significantly once the sun had set. The injured were dying; the dying were now dead. And fresh blood flowed at the hands of Raif and his companions as their swords met little to no resistance. But one formidable enemy had been forgotten in all the chaos. More dangerous than Delilah, more devious than Azriel, and more deadly than the most vicious Lyhtan, the Enphigmalé had joined the fray.

  As if he knew my thoughts, Raif paused and caught my eye. He ran his sword through his opponent’s chest and pulled a scabbard from around his shoulder. With a great heave, my katana soared above the heads of the fighting armies, and I dug my heels into the ground and took off at a run. I leapt as the katana arched and came down, and caught it in a swift and fluid motion. Ripping the blade from its protective sheath, I discarded the black scabbard and ran through the ranks of allies and foes alike, my form nothing but a passing breeze.

  Three of the four gargoyles had converged on Tyler. Bright teeth flashed in the graying light and claws dug into his golden fur. He bit and fought, twisting and swinging with his massive paws, but the tables had turned against him, and he was losing. Blood trickled down his face, and the fur around one shoulder was matted where the flesh was torn. I saw his composure falter, and his glistening nose sniffed the air for barely a moment. He made eye contact, and before he swept his foreleg at a biting mouth, he thrashed his massive head as if to tell me to keep my distance. An Enphigmalé seized the opportunity of his distraction and sank its teeth deep into Tyler’s throat.

  He should have known I didn’t follow directions well. Panic surged within me as I put Raif’s training to good use and jumped right in the middle of the feeding frenzy. Tyler had slumped to the ground; I didn’t have time to gauge whether he was conscious or not. My only thought centered on keeping him safe. I kicked at the beast whose jaws snapped repeatedly, trying to finish what it started. The force of the impact sent it flying a good twenty feet or so, and it barreled into a Lyhtan trying to flee the melee. It made a quick and easy meal for the insatiable Enphigmalé that gobbled its prey like it hadn’t already glutted itself for hours.

  I swung with the katana at the second gargoyle, who tried to flog me with its great, leathery wings. I cut through the skin-covered appendage and the beast swung around, snarling and snapping, grazing my arm in the process. I jerked back and stabbed high, piercing one of the glowing silver eyes. The creature reared and stomped down, shaking the earth with the movement. It pawed at the bleeding hole in its head, thrashing and whimpering as it bucked and jumped away.

  Twilight faded into ever-darkening night, and the Shaede army continued its efforts against the Lyhtans, who refused to surrender despite their vulnerable state. A flash of red leather caught my eye and a long braid whipped through the air as Anya spun and danced in battle. She flashed a wicked smile in my direction, the exulting rush of battle lust flushing her cheeks, and the joy of victory glowing in her violet eyes.

  The other Shaedes had twenty-seven minutes and nine seconds before they could pass into shadow, but I was not held by such restraints. I passed into the gray again and again as the Enphigmalé tried to make purchase on my twisting form. I cut and stabbed, sliced and jabbed, protecting Tyler the only way I could, while he lay bleeding and damaged. One of the braver gargoyles charged, and I rammed the katana into the earth as I waited for the charging beast. My breathing slowed, my focus sharpened, and I stood my ground. Its progress came slow and measured in my new and heightened sense of time. I reached out, and my palms wrapped around the beast’s face. As I jumped to the side, avoiding its charge, I twisted with all my might, groaning under the tremendous force. Its strength was immense, more of stone than flesh. I jerked hard, and after hearing the snap of its neck, I released my hold. The Enphigmalé continued in a skid across the clearing until its progress was stayed by a rather large tree. The great gray beast slammed into the trunk, twitched, and let a loud snort from its wide nostrils before becoming still. It did not move again.

  I pulled my sword from the ground and charged another, leaping onto its expansive back. It turned circles, trying to throw me off, but the movement seemed so slow, I barely felt it. I raised the katana high and stabbed down through the flesh and bone, deep into the creature’s skull. I wrapped both hands around the hilt and twisted the katana. The gargoyle crumpled in a useless heap and jerked once, twice, and died.

  The last of the gray hour melted into night. Screams echoed in the clearing, the sound of the injured and dying lingering on the wind. Raif turned his force’s attention to the Enphigmalé, they joined my efforts to eradicate the ever-starving beasts before they could do any more damage.

  Leaving the battle to skilled warriors, I turned my attention to Tyler. I gripped the wide collar in my hands and pulled with all my strength, forcing the heavy clasp until it broke under the pressure. I threw it to the side, and, within moments, the bear’s form shrunk and faded away. In its place lay a bleeding, naked man, his breath rasping in his chest.

  “Ty, can you hear me?” I said close to his ear. “Hold on. Don’t leave me yet.” I threw off my coat, then ripped the sleeve from my shirt and wrapped it around the gaping wound in Tyler’s neck.

  His eyes fluttered and my heart mimicked the act. Not dead. I sighed.

  “Raif,” he said, barely a murmur. “Is he here?”

  “Yes,” I breathed. “My wish is your command, right?”

  He gave a wan smile. “Exactly.”

  Around me the Enphigmalé snarled, Lyhtans screamed, and Shaedes cheered. But in front of me, Tyler lay dying. I didn’t care about any of those other things if I couldn’t fix the only thing that mattered. “Tyler,” I said. “I wish—”

  “No!” he said, forceful for the first time. “Don’t say it, Darian. You can’t.”

  “Why not?” I asked, trying to keep the desperation from my voice. “If I can’t use my wishes to heal you, what good are they?”

  “My life is yours, not the other way around. You can’t wish the dying back to life, remember? I love you, Darian. All that matters to me is you’re safe. If I have to die to make sure that happens, so be it. We have to follow the rules.”

  “Fuck the rules,” I said through my emerging tears, “I don’t give a damn about your rules! I wish you were better. I wish you were healed.”

  His eyes drifted shut, and I gave him a shake. “I wish you were healed! Damn it, Tyler. Don’t do this to me! I wish you were healed!”

  A sudden wave of energy left me like air from a vacuum. I slumped over, my breathing heavy for the first time in this long and seemingly ceaseless day. The wet, slurping sound of Tyler’s breathing didn’t slacken despite my urgent wish. I retrieved my black duster and draped it over him, whispering the words over and over. Wishing, willing him to live. “Don’t leave me,” I whispered over his chest. “Please, Ty. Don’t leave me.”

  In a gust of warm and fragrant air, Raif came to stand beside me, placing a reassuring hand on my shoulder. I wanted to shake him off, to refuse the comfort he offered as I all
owed myself to deny the fact that there might soon be reason for me to grieve.

  “One of the beasts ran,” Raif said, with a mixture of anger and regret. Blood stained his shirt from a cut to his forearm, and his face was beaded with sweat. “But the remaining three are dead.”

  “What about the Lyhtans?” I asked, combing my fingers through Ty’s hair.

  Raif laughed. “No contest there—almost a disappointment. Most of them are dead. The others fled.”

  “And ours? How many gone?”

  His voice became thick. “Eleven.”

  “Anya?”

  “Alive.”

  Oh, well. You can’t win ’em all. Really, I could have cared less if she lived or died. The only thing I cared about was bleeding away on the grass.

  “Azriel is gone. The Oracle as well.”

  My shoulders slumped. Leave it to the snake to find the quickest way through the grass. He couldn’t hide forever, though. And when I found him, he’d pay in spades. “How did you find me?” And how do we get back? Could we get back?

  “I just knew,” Raif said. “It was the strangest thing. One moment I was scouring maps, trying to pinpoint locations that they may have taken you, and the next moment, I knew where you were and exactly how to get here. I assume that was your Jinn’s doing. Very clever, Darian.”

  Sounds drifted to my ears—the running of a great beast through the woods, the last, sighing breath of the dying, and solid pats on the back as comrades-in-arms congratulated one another. The night progressed and time marched on, the cadence of which had not left me and probably never would. For the umpteenth time, I tried to ignore the sensation that the world spun within me, outward.

  “We should take him home,” Raif said, placing his other hand around my opposite arm to encourage me to stand. “We’ll do everything we can for him.”

  Several branches were brought and bound together with vines. My duster was thrown over the makeshift cot. And though I insisted Tyler would be no burden for me to carry, Raif insisted just as sternly that he be transported with the least amount of jostling possible. I reluctantly agreed and followed behind, as the remaining members of Raif’s forces, led by Xander, made their way to the bower, and, one by one, stepped through the gaping black portal.

  When we emerged on the other side, the blinding sunlight threw me for a loop. Raif shielded his eyes from the offending glare. “When we arrived here, it was the dead of night. Imagine our surprise to walk into that opening and come out in the light of day.”

  I didn’t have to imagine anything; I was surprised enough. We loaded Tyler onto one of two large pontoon boats. I raised a questioning brow to Raif.

  “What? They were the only vessels I could find. How else would you expect me to transport so many after daybreak?”

  I allowed a subdued laugh. “No wonder it took you so long.”

  “What do you mean so long? You’ve been gone for only twelve hours.”

  My jaw dropped a little. Time had become a different thing entirely on the other side of the bowered portal. Hours had become days, and no one was the wiser. No one but me.

  “Not that it would have mattered,” Raif continued. “You could have taken them all single-handedly. I’m impressed, Darian. You’re a true warrior.”

  He inclined his head respectfully and left me at the bow of the sluggish boat that chugged us from the island to the mainland. Tyler remained unconscious, lying in the shade of the awning. I wanted to be at his side, but I needed to be alone, to feel the wind in my face, whipping my hair. My eyes stung as unshed tears came to the fore, finally spilling over my lids and down my cheeks. I swiped them away, swallowing against the grief that threatened to consume me. I didn’t think I could live without Tyler. I sure as hell knew I wouldn’t want to. I breathed in deeply, letting the cool air clean the stench of Lyhtans, death, and betrayal from my memory. If only it could erase the memory of change.

  A warm body pressed against my back and I closed my eyes. Still on the edge of violence, I could easily lay my fist to the softer parts of his face. But despite everything that had passed between us, I knew somehow that Xander held an inexplicable magnetism. I was drawn to him, no matter how many times he’d burned me. He’d tried to protect me in his own way. And like a nagging child, starved for attention, he made sure his presence was known.

  “You are different,” Xander said. The King of Obvious, among other things.

  “Yes.”

  “You have made yourself yet again. How did it happen?”

  I sighed. The last thing I wanted to do was satisfy Xander’s sick curiosity. His ambition knew no limit. “Would you lock me up and try to discover my secrets?” I asked, my voice broken and weary. “Do you share your enemy’s desire to be both light and dark, free to roam unseen in the night or day? Would you take the gray as well and make it your own at my expense?”

  “I would take you and keep you safe,” he said, bending to lay his cheek against the top of my head. “I would take you and make you mine if you would only let me.”

  “That’s not going to happen,” I said, refusing to turn and look at him.

  “Maybe not now,” he said, confident as he ever was, “but someday.”

  “Raif said Tyler would be taken to your house,” I said, ignoring his romance-novel spiel. “If you don’t want him there, I understand.”

  Xander turned, and as he walked away his voice carried to me. “The Jinn is welcome. He saved the woman I love.”

  If anyone loved dramatics more than me, it was Xander.

  Chapter 29

  A mournful air hung heavy throughout Xander’s house. Lives and friends had been lost on the island. Enemies as well had slipped through our grasp. Tyler had been cleaned, his wounds tended, though they refused to heal, and his care knew no limits.

  Curious stares and whispers followed me wherever I went. An oddity, something to be pointed at and talked about but never to. Some avoided me altogether after tales of the clearing became more widespread. No one dared speak about it in the presence of the king, as it was well-known I was far and above his favorite. Alienation took on an entirely new meaning as I wandered the halls of Xander’s house, looking for any diversion to take my mind off Tyler, who still hadn’t regained consciousness.

  Hours passed to days and days to weeks. Raif had formed reconnaissance parties whose sole mission was to flush Azriel and Delilah from hiding. They’d been unsuccessful.

  I’d been given my own suite of rooms; I hadn’t even stepped foot in my own studio since our trip across the lake, and I was comfortable enough. Though the house lacked the privacy I craved, it held Tyler, and he held my heart.

  I’d been alone for a century and then found and cherished. But now I was alone again, the only one of my kind, sticking out rather than belonging. Time marched on, and I felt every second of its passing deep in my soul. The sun rose and set, and the moon inevitably came to take its place. I felt all of it, my form ever changing from light to gray to dark and back to gray again.

  I stood on my balcony, listening to the sounds of the city mingle with the sounds of nature in the strange area where all manner of lives and lifestyles converged. The comfort I gleaned from the never-changing bustle of Seattle was the only thing I had in a life that felt too full and too empty all at once.

  “How’ve you been?” A cool voice asked out of nowhere.

  Past shock of any kind, I merely smiled, remembering Raif’s words: Be patient, and your prey will come to you. “What are you doing here?” I asked. “Shouldn’t you be running from Raif?”

  “I should,” Azriel said in a very cavalier, very him manner. “But I wanted to see you before I leave for good.”

  “For good—or for a while?” I asked.

  Azriel’s laughter lent to the chill of the night air. “Maybe a little of both,” he said. “I doubt I’ll stay away for too long.”

  “You’ve always needed to be in the spotlight. I can’t imagine this worked out the way you expec
ted it to.”

  “We wouldn’t have killed you,” he offered, as if I cared.

  “No,” I said. “You would have just thrown my scraps to your Lyhtan dogs.”

  “A ruse,” he scoffed. “We needed their help, nothing else. No one but Delilah and I know your true purpose. But it will come out”—he laughed as if sharing a private joke—“in time.”

  “Oh yeah?” I said, sarcastic as ever. “Sounds like this had less to do with me and more to do with revenge. For Delilah, at least.”

  Azriel shrugged. “True. Delilah has a score to settle. And she’s not particularly fond of Shaedes. Well”—he smirked—“one in particular. But wouldn’t you seek revenge if someone dear to you had died needlessly?”

  I gave him a you’ve-got-to-be-fucking-kidding-me look. Azriel had more balls than sense to say that to me. The only person I’d ever truly loved was about to die needlessly. And you could bet someone was going to pay for it.

  “So you can hardly blame her for her actions,” Azriel said. “She’s actually quite brilliant. And an Oracle is always handy to have around. She put all of this together, you know. With a little help . . .”

  “From you?” I asked.

  “Wouldn’t you like to know?” Azriel laughed. “She sent me to you in the first place. Told me that through you, I’d gain my father’s crown. I imagine she sent your Jinn to you as well. Or at the very least, pointed him in the right direction. The way I see it, Darian, you owe her a debt of thanks. She did set the two of you up, after all.”

  “Jealous?” I asked.

  “You have no idea,” Azriel said, and for a moment, he almost sounded sincere. “But the Enphigmalé would have never awakened without your little romance. The odds were one in a million that you’d wake them. Curses are funny things, Darian. To break one, you need all the elements that made it to begin with. In this case, it took an act of deep, abiding love to break the curse. Well”—Azriel flashed a secretive smile—“love, and the blood of a fated protector.”