The Undead Heart

by Tate Jackson

  “What do we do now?” Jenny asked. “We don’t do anything. We can’t change the future,” Beck answered. Harley was incredulous, “So, we just let him go on killing?”

  “Yes, that’s exactly what we do,” she said. “ Look, I know it sucks, but it has to be this way.”

  Harley smiled. “It ‘sucks? That sounds a bit perverted, Beck.”

  “It should, it means exactly what it sounds like.”

  Harley roared with laughter, and the discussion about Elderson was over.

  “I’m going to bed. I’m wiped out.”

  “I’ll tuck you in” Richard said, and followed her up the stairs.

  ***

  He could see in Beck’s eyes that she was not handling what she had seen nearly as well as she would like everyone to believe. Potter was visibly shaken, as well. He couldn’t even imagine how it had been for him to watch a vampyre slaughter a human right before his eyes and do nothing. The sheer willpower it had taken for him to stand his ground was not definable.

  He’d said he would not leave Beck’s side, and he had not. He could not imagine another hunter showing the kind of control that Potter had tonight. That he had been able to do it showed the love he had for Beck. He’d watched Beck with Potter and saw the easy brother/sister relationship they’d formed. Beck and Potter both had fit into his family as if they had always been there. He’d never thought he would see the day that he would have a human wife and a hunter brother. It should feel strange, but it did not.

  But he wished she would understand that she was human. She was very brave, but she was going to get herself killed if she wasn’t more careful. She would not be going to ‘observe’ any more murders. He would have followed her tonight, but his family had held him prisoner in the house until well after the time of the murder. He was sure that Beck had put them up to it.

  He had a distinct feeling that there were things she wasn’t telling him, but not why? Why would she travel to the past to help them and not tell them everything? Why would she lie to him, even by omission? Maybe he was just being paranoid. Maybe she wasn’t really hiding anything from him. Leso would have told him if she was lying about anything. Wouldn’t he?

  ***

  Over the next three weeks, she was able to let go of what she had seen, but she knew she would never forget it. When she’d started to teach her family how to fight, she had run into some resistance.

  “We don’t need to learn how to fight,” Harley argued. “We already know how to fight,” Harley had argued.

  “I know you can fight just as well as any other vampyre. I want to teach you to fight better than them.”

  “Beck, most of the things you’re teaching us won’t help. We have to be able to take their head,” Bruce added.

  “How fast do you heal from a broken bone?” she asked. Jenny answered, “A second, maybe two, depending on where the break is at.”

  “Well, then that gives you a one to two second advantage. Break enough bones and you’ll have several extra seconds to find the best way to take the head.”

  They had not complained much since then, and they were coming along nicely. She had taught them to do spinning back kicks, the Kimura, the Guillotine choke, the triangle choke, arm bars, the rear naked choke, the ankle lock, and leg locks. They took to it all in easily.

  The hardest thing to teach them was to watch their guard positions. Otherwise, the only problem she was having was Richard’s refusal to learn.

  “I don’t need to do this. I can fight just fine already,” he said from his place on the porch.

  “It wouldn’t hurt to learn more.”

  “No thanks,” was all he’d say. She walked back across the yard to watch Harley and Bruce square off against each other. Harley landed a good, solid, knee to Bruce’s ribs.

  “Good shot, Harley! Bruce, watch your guard,” she instructed.

  Bruce got in under Harley’s arm and punched him in the face, breaking his jaw with a loud snap.

  “That’s better.”

  She backed up several yards so she could keep an eye on everyone. She had just dropped down into a squat when she felt the warm gush of blood between her legs. Damn it! Before she could stand up, she was knocked hard to the ground, and a heavy weight pinned her down.

  Just as quickly as the weight hit her, it was gone. She popped onto her feet and found Potter blocking Richard from approaching her. “No, Richard,” Potter was saying as he pushed Richard backwards.

  “Move, Hunter!” Richard roared. “No, you’re going to hurt her if you don’t control yourself.” Everyone in the yard had frozen to watch what was happening. Richard seemed to struggle with himself before dropping back. Potter shot over his shoulder to Beck. “Are you alright?”

  “Yes, I’m fine,” she answered, and she stepped around Potter and punched Richard in the mouth. “What is your problem?! Are you out of your rabid-ass mind?! Don’t you ever put your hands on me like that again!”

  “I’m sorry Beck. It is just your scent. I am having a hard time controlling myself right now,” Richard explained.

  “So what, you’re going to attach me every time I get my period!? I don’t think so, asshole! You better grow up, because the next time you jump on me like that, we’re done!” she screamed at the top of her lungs and stormed off. She went into the house, grabbed some fresh clothes and one of the torn rags, and went to the stream behind the house.

  She was cleaning up when Jenny walked up.

  “So, what was that all about?” she inquired.

  “What do you mean ‘what was it about’? He was going to attack me!”

  “Attack you? He wasn’t going to attack you, Beck.”

  “What would you call it then?”

  “It was just his instinct to protect his mate. Even human men do it to a certain extent. It’s just worse for you, because Richard catches your scent much stronger than a human man could.”

  “I don’t understand,” she murmured, but she was getting a sick feeling in the pit of her stomach telling her that she had made a terrible mistake.

  “When he catches the scent of your menstrual blood, it triggers his instinct to protect you from all other males that may also catch your scent. He wasn’t attacking you. He was attempting to keep you from getting attacked.”

  She pulled on clean pants and picked up her boots. “I need to go talk to him.”

  Now that she knew what he’d really been doing, she felt horrible for yelling at him. She also felt like an idiot for thinking that he would attack her in the first place. She knew him better than that. “You can’t, he’s gone.”

  “Gone?” she asked. “Gone where?!”

  “I don’t know, just gone. He won’t come back for at least a few days, not until your time of the month has passed.”

  “SHIT!”

  “Richard loves you, Beck. He would never hurt you. Why in the world would you think he was going to attack you?”

  Beck didn’t answer Jenny’s question, she just looked down at the ground.

  “Ahh, I’m sorry, Beck. You didn’t tell us that you were attacked before. Does Richard know?”

  “No, he doesn’t, and please don’t tell him,” she begged. “Of course I won’t tell him.”

  “Thank you for explaining this to me.”

  “Someone needed to, and it won’t be so bad the next time, you’ll see. Come on, let’s get back to the house and get you something to eat.”

  Beck walked back to the house with Jenny, feeling like a fool. He was gone, and now she would have to wait an entire week to apologize to him for the misunderstanding.

  ***

  He ran. He was more than a mile and a half away before he outran her scent. He’d actually jumped on her! Had it not been for Potter, he might have actually grabbed her and ran. As it was, he’d had to restrain himself from killing Potter when he pulled him off of her.

  His mind knew that Potter was protecting Beck, but every other fiber of his being had taken it as a challenge
, as a threat to her. It had taken everything he had not to attack him. He was not surprised when he felt Leso coming his way.

  “Well, that was interesting,” Leso said as he sat down under a tree beside him.

  “It was stupid. What’s wrong with me?”

  “It wasn’t your fault. It just took you by surprise.”

  “It wasn’t her fault either. She’s right. What am I going to do, throw her down and stand guard over her every month? I could have hurt her by trying to protect her.”

  “Being punched in the mouth seemed to have brought you around. Maybe she could just bash you in the head once a month,” Leso laughed. “I’m glad you’re amused, brother,” he growled. “She overreacted. There was no need to hit you.”

  “She had every right to hit me. I had just tackled her. There’s no telling what she thought was going on. I scared her.”

  “She didn’t look scared. She looked mad. Scared people don’t generally punch vampyres in the face.”

  “Maybe, but she was definitely angry.”

  “Yes, but only because she thought you were going to force yourself on her,” Leso stated.

  “WHAT?” he said, stunned. “No… she would never think I that would do that.”

  Surely Beck knew he would never do anything to hurt her, that he would rather die than see her come to any harm. “You need to learn to pay attention. Look at it from her point of view. She started her period, and you jumped on her and pinned her to the ground. Potter had to throw you off of her. After she punched you, she told you to ‘never put your hands on her like that again’. Did it not occur to you what she meant by that?”

  It hadn’t. He never even considered that she thought that he would attack her. Could she really think he would do something as disgusting, as vile, as raping her?

  “Shit!” he whispered.

  “You should go and talk to her.”

  “I can’t, not yet.”

  “Well, then soon. I know Jenny went to talk to her. She’s probably going to feel badly about hitting you.”

  “If she thought I was going to force myself on her, then she should feel badly,” he fumed, becoming angry with her for even thinking such a thing. “Don’t be petty.”

  “Go away, Leso,” he growled. Leso smiled and took off.

  ***

  It’d been a long six days with Richard gone. She wanted to talk to him, to apologize for what she had said and done, but he hadn’t come home yet. She’d spent most of the time he was gone talking to Jenny, Potter, and Leso. She was probably more comfortable with them because she had known them longer than everyone else.

  They were talking on the back porch, and had gotten into a conversation about vampyres and their hunting habits.

  “Richard told me once that he had to feed every seven days. Is that the case for all vampyres?

  “More or less, it depends on the vampyre, and their size of the last meal, but seven days sounds about right,” Jenny answered.

  “Why do most vampyres feed on human blood?”

  “Well, we all started off as humans. I think our bodies crave human blood in an attempt to repair itself, to replace what it no longer has. Only a few of us have been able to make the adjustments to live without it. It’s not an easy thing to do. It’s easier on Leso than the rest of us, because he has never drank human blood,” Jenny continued.

  Beck directed her next question to Leso, “So, you don’t crave human blood at all?”

  “Well, humans still smell like food to me, but they smell like a food I don’t particularly like, like broccoli to children,” Leso explained. “So, what happens if you don’t feed every seven days?”

  “Well, obviously, we don’t die, but it would become unbearable. After a few weeks, we would be driven insane by the thirst,” Leso said.

  “That sounds horrible. Richard said you chose to become what you are now. Can I ask why?”

  “I know it’s surprising that anyone would choose this kind of existence. Imagine being on your deathbed and knowing your life is over. Now imagine that in that exact moment, you were presented with another option, that you could live, no matter how lowly that existence may be. Could you turn your back on it?”

  “I see your point, but you don’t look all that miserable to me. None of you do.”

  “It has everything to do with how we chose to live the life we’ve been given. I was lucky enough to have Richard to help keep me on the right path,” Leso smiled.

  “Speaking of Richard, he’s back,” Jenny told Beck. She looked down the yard, and sure enough, Richard was stepping out of the woods. She watched him walk across the long yard towards them. It wasn’t until he got closer that she could see that he looked angry, totally pissed off actually. Was he this mad that she had hit him? It couldn’t have hurt. He was a vampyre, for Christ sake! When he got to the bottom of the steps, she stood and took two steps backwards away from him.

  “Don’t,” he said, grabbed her, threw her over his shoulder, and bounded back into the woods. When they were out of hearing distance of the house, he placed her back on her feet. He grabbed her by her shoulders and gently shook her. “What’s wrong with you?! How could you ever think I would do something as vile, as repulsive, as forcing myself on you?!” he yelled. “I’m sorry; I didn’t understand what was going on until Jenny explained it to me.”

  “That’s not an excuse for believing that I would do that. Don’t you understand how much I love you? You are literally the very beat of my heart. Every time you give your body to me, it is a gift. I would never just take you. I need you to know that, Little One. I would never let anyone do that to you.”

  She tried to control the expression on her face at his last words, but was not quick enough.

  “Beck?”

  She knew what he was asking, what he had seen in her face, but she didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t wanted this to come up while she was here.

  “Beck?” he asked again, shaking her by the shoulders.

  “I don’t want to talk about this now, Richard,” she said, pulling away from him. “Let’s just go home.”

  He grabbed her again and pulled her back to him.

  “Beck?” he in a stained voice.

  “Look, it was a long time ago,” she said, and tried to pull away from him again.

  “Tell me what happened, Beck.”

  “I said that I don’t want to talk about it! Now let me go!” she screamed, and yanked back out of his grip.

  He grabbed her shoulders again and dragged her back to him.

  “Tell me what happened, Beck!” he shouted. “Where was I that this could have happened to you?”

  It wasn’t until he said that, that she realized she was angry with him. Where had he been when her innocence was stolen? When her body was abused and broken; where had he been!? When she had needed his protection the most, he had not been there. Why?!

  He said he had watched over her. Where the hell had he been that night? Where had he been in the months after? For the court case, for the plea agreement. Where had he been when it had been within his power to stop it from happening? Where had he been?!

  “Fine! You want this memory! THEN TAKE IT!!!” she spat, grabbing his wrist and remembering.

  She’d just skimmed over the memory of the rape the first time she had shown him, not this time, though. This time she focused on every detail; her fear; the smell of Alex Whitman’s breath; her helplessness; the pain of the beating; the sound of her bones breaking; the taste of her own blood in her mouth; the pain of the rape itself as he hammered his body into hers, and her humiliation after being thrown from the car. She gave it all to him.

  When she was done, he opened his eyes, took a step back, turned away, and vomited blood on the ground.

  ***

  What had he let happen to her? He wanted to kill that boy, but there was no one to kill yet. He wanted to pull from the memory in his head, but he was frozen to the ground. Beck had already walked away, and he could not mo
ve to follow her. He wanted to tell her to wait, but his throat was locked down.

  He couldn’t stop the sound of her ribs breaking from echoing in his head. The memory of the pain she had suffered drove him to his knees. He grabbed his head in his hands, trying to force the memory back, but it wouldn’t let him go. He relived her attack over and over in his head, watching the boy force himself into Beck’s body. Where had he been? Why had he not protected her? This was his fault. He had failed her in the worst way imaginable, and he could never change it.

  He could stop it from happening to the Beck of the future, but this Beck, his Beck, would always remember. He was so emerged in her memory that he had not sensed or heard Leso’s approach.

  “What happened, Richard?” He could not even look at him. “What did she do to you?”

  “Do to me? She did nothing to me, and it has become quite apparent that I have done nothing for her,” he groaned.

  “What are you talking about, brother?”

  “I missed it. How did I miss it?” he said, more to himself than to Leso.

  “Missed what, Richard?”

  “I was supposed to keep her safe.”

  “Keep who safe? Beck?”

  “She was attacked. A man, a boy really, beat her, raped her, and threw her away like garbage, and I was not there to stop it.”

  Her thinking he would force himself on her made sense now. It had happened to her before. Her learning to fight made sense now, too. She’d had to learn to defend herself, because he certainly had not done it. “She told you this?”

  “No, she showed me.”

  “She gave you her memory of it?”

  Richard nodded.

  “My God! Why?” Leso asked, obviously shocked.

  “I asked her to tell me what had happened to her.”

  “She didn’t have to give you the memory. She could have just told you.”

  “She could have. I wish she’d have done it that way.”

  “It was cruel for her to do that to you.”

  “No, it was only fair. Why should she be the only one to carry this memory when it was I that failed to protect her?”