by A. T Brennan
Nathan moved slowly enough for Cameron to adjust as he did, and he cried out as Nathan bottomed out inside him.
“Fuck yes!” Cameron cried out as Nathan pulled out until only the head of his cock was keeping him open, and then cried out again as Nathan thrust inside him, fast and hard.
One hand closed over his shoulder, giving Nathan extra leverage to really pound into him.
Cameron pressed his cheek against the cool surface of the counter and squeezed his hands into fists to try and dispel some of the tension building inside him. He was wound as tight as a top and so close to coming he could barely think.
Nathan let go of his shoulder and reached around him so he could jack him off as he fucked him.
“Come for me, love,” Nathan whispered in his ear as he pressed Cameron into the counter. “Come for me.”
“I’m almost there,” he gasped. “I’m so close!”
A moment before his pleasure crested, Nathan shifted and nailed his prostate with one long, hard thrust. Cameron’s body immediately contracted around him as he cried out and gave in to his orgasm.
Nathan humped into him, his thrusts erratic, as he fucked Cameron right through his release. When he was finally done, Cameron tightened his muscles around Nathan’s cock, silently urging him to come too.
Nathan jerked against him, crying out his name as he emptied into the condom. Cameron could feel the heat of his seed through the condom and shuddered at the thought of one day getting to feel Nathan fill him up with no barriers.
When Nathan lay over his back, both of them heaving as they tried to catch their breath, Cameron sighed. His body was still tingling, and his mind was fuzzy.
When Nathan finally stood up and pulled out of him, Cameron had to hold onto the counter to keep steady.
“My legs are shaking,” he said with a shy grin as Nathan gave him a questioning look.
“Mine are too.”
Cameron smiled and took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment as he enjoyed the lingering effects of his orgasm.
It was at that moment he realized they were in the kitchen half-dressed, and the kids were upstairs and in bed.
“Oh my God,” he gasped as he spun around. “The kids.”
Nathan glanced up at the ceiling, then at the doorway behind him.
“I’m sorry—”
“Cameron, stop apologizing. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Nathan interrupted as he picked up his sweatpants and handed them to him. “Come on.” He nodded to the main hallway.
“I should go upstairs.” He shook his head.
“We have to talk about this at some point. We might as well do it now.”
He opened his mouth to protest, but Nathan was right. They had to talk about this.
He pulled his pants on as Nathan grabbed a few sheets of paper towel and quickly wiped his cum off the side of the island
When everything was clean, Nathan tossed the paper towels in the trash and nodded for Cameron to follow him.
He led him into the media room and closed the door before sitting on the sofa. Cameron perched on the edge of the sofa next to him and tried to think of something to say.
“I’m—”
“Don’t apologize,” Nathan interrupted. “It happened, and we both wanted it. Don’t put the blame on yourself again.”
He closed his mouth and nodded. Nathan was right. There was no blame to assign here.
“I’m attracted to you,” Nathan said after a pause. “I find you frustrating and fascinating. As much as I tell myself that we can’t, that I shouldn’t, I see you and it’s like I can’t help myself.”
“I know what you mean. I feel the same way. I tell myself we can’t, convince myself that we won’t, and then it’s like I can’t control myself when you’re around.”
“I lost my head in there,” Nathan said after another pause. “I saw you, and I wanted you. I didn’t even think about where we were or about...” he trailed off as he glanced up at the ceiling.
“I wanted you too.”
“I don’t know what to do about this.” Nathan sighed and leaned back on the sofa.
“Is it because I work here?” Cameron asked tentatively.
“What?”
“I’m here; I’m available...is that what’s happening?”
“Cameron, no. If I wanted a warm body, there are plenty of options out there. It’s not that you’re here and available; it’s that you’re you. It’s you that I want, not just a body,” he repeated. “And I haven’t wanted anyone, not since...”
“I’m sorry. And I want you too. But we can’t keep doing this.”
“I know.” Nathan rubbed his hand through his hair. “I know that, but it’s like I said, I just lose my head around you.”
“I do too, but what exactly do we have going on here? Are we friends with benefits?”
“I don’t know, but it’s not just about sex for me.”
“Me either,” he said softly.
“You never felt pressured with me, did you?” Nathan asked suddenly. “I mean, you didn’t feel like I was pressuring you or—”
“No,” he cut in. “Not at all. I wanted to.”
“Good, because I want you to know you can always say no—”
“I know, but I never wanted to,” he assured him. “So what do we do now? As much as I want to say we should just forget about it and make sure it doesn’t happen again I know that would be a lie.”
“Yeah. I honestly don’t want to stop being with you. I don’t think I could, but it’s not appropriate.”
“Do you want me to quit?”
“What? No—”
“That way you wouldn’t have to fire me.”
“I’m not going to make you quit your job because I can’t keep it in my pants around you.”
“It’s not just you,” he pointed out. “I can’t seem to keep my pants on when I’m around you.”
“True, but that’s because I keep ripping them off you.”
“True,” Cameron conceded with a chuckle.
“This is probably the most inappropriate thing I’ve ever said, and I wouldn’t blame you for reporting me to someone,” Nathan started. “But do you think we could find a balance?”
“A balance?”
“During the day you would be here for the kids. I would be here for the kids, but after they went to bed...”
“Like all business in the day and then have naked time at night?”
“I wasn’t thinking anything quite that crude.” Nathan shook his head with a smile. “More like we see each other.”
“Like date?”
“Kind of.” He nodded.
“Something tells me that would get very messy, very fast,” Cameron said thoughtfully. “But I’m not opposed to it,” he added before Nathan could agree and take back the suggestion. Now that they’d been together a third time he couldn’t just be Nathan’s employee, not after everything they’d shared.
“I don’t know what I feel or what we have here, but there’s something, and I don’t want to go back to the way things were. I don’t think I could.”
“We’ll need to set some ground rules, but it could work.” Cameron smiled. The idea of being able to explore things with Nathan was very appealing.
“Always the pragmatist, aren’t we.”
“Always.” He nodded. “Daytime is kid time. When they’re around, we have to be nothing more than their father and nanny. We can’t let them in on anything. It would be too confusing, and it wouldn’t be right.”
“Of course.”
“And my agency can’t know,” he added. “Having relationships with our employers is strictly forbidden, and I can get in a lot of trouble. Add the whole gay thing, and I would instantly lose my job and all my references and experience if this came out.”
“Of course.”
“What about you? Do you have any rules?”
“We live in the same house; you’re here with my kids all day,” he said thoughtfully. �
��There has to be a little separation between us.”
“Like we sleep separately? You still go out occasionally, and I take my days off away from the house?”
“Yeah.” Nathan nodded.
“That’s probably a good idea. I hadn’t even thought of that.”
“Have you ever lived with a partner?”
“No. Only with family or roommates.”
“Living with someone can complicate things. It can blur lines and create a sense of instant intimacy, but it can also make things too intense, and that can ruin things.”
“Well, all of that sounds awful. So let’s avoid that.”
“Agreed.”
Cameron stifled a yawn and grinned sheepishly at Nathan.
“Tired?”
“Yeah. I should get to bed.”
“Goodnight, Cameron.”
“Night.”
As he stood, Nathan caught his wrist and pulled him down for a quick kiss. Cameron tried not to grin like a fool as he stood up and headed out the door.
He hurried up to his room, and as soon as the door closed behind him, he leaned against it and shook his head. “What the hell, Cameron?” he asked the empty room as he closed his eyes. “What the hell are you doing?”
NATHAN WAS CONFLICTED. He sat in the media room long after Cameron left to go to bed, and he couldn’t shut his mind down. He shouldn’t have slept with Cameron that first night. They never should have lain in bed talking like lovers and friends after. It had made staying away from him impossible.
He’d told himself over and over again that was it. They’d given in to the chemistry between them and had an incredible night together. He’d promised himself that he wouldn’t give in to his desires and urges again, but he had.
When he’d seen Cameron standing at the kitchen island, every promise he’d made flew out of his mind, and he’d been overcome with the urge to hold him again. To feel his body against his, and to hear him crying out in pleasure.
Sex with Cameron was amazing, but that’s not all he wanted. He also wanted the long conversations. The cuddling and the secret smiles. He wanted to have epic make-out sessions and watch movies together. He wanted a partner, but he wasn’t ready for that yet. Was he?
Cameron was single-handedly making him reconsider his entire life, and that was unsettling, to say the least.
There was no way he could give Cameron up now. He needed and wanted him in a way he’d never felt before, and he had to explore it to see if it was real.
He knew it was a bad idea, it was the worst idea, but the more they’d talked about it, the more he thought it might work. It might be messy and end horribly, but that was a risk he was willing to take in order to figure out what he was feeling.
Chapter Nine
Nathan brought out a side of Cameron he’d never known was there.
Cameron had never had that high of a sex drive. He liked sex, he had no problem helping himself out when he was in the mood, but he’d never been with someone he couldn’t get enough of. The more he and Nathan were together, the more he craved him, and Nathan was opening his eyes to so many things he’d never realized he would enjoy.
They made love pretty much everywhere there was a door to separate them from the rest of the house. They took their time getting to know each other’s bodies, and what they preferred, and it was amazing.
Sexually they clicked. They were wildly attracted to each other, and when they were together, it was almost always wonderful and explosive. There were moments that were less than perfect, and some that just didn’t seem to work, but they just laughed them off and tried something different.
They clicked emotionally as well. They laughed and joked and were able to have real and true conversations. They had a lot of the same views, but they had enough different ones they could still debate and discuss and learn from each other.
It was incredible, and he’d never thought he would have someone like Nathan in his life.
“CAN I TALK TO YOU ABOUT something?” Cameron asked as he and Cara sat in the kitchen sipping glasses of wine. They’d had a nice dinner and Alex and the kids were in the basement watching a movie, but Cameron really needed to talk to someone about what was going on between him and Nathan.
“Of course. I assumed that’s why you passed on the movie to have wine with me up here.”
“I’m a little transparent sometimes, aren’t I?”
“What’s going on, Cameron? We’ve barely heard from you since you started your job, and you obviously have something bothering you.”
Cameron just looked into his glass, swirling the wine around as he thought about how to start the conversation.
“Do you not like it there?”
“No, I like it there.” He shook his head. “But there is something.”
“What?”
“My boss.”
“What about him?” Cara looked at his closely. “Why are you blushing like that?”
“We kind of...”
“You didn’t.”
“We did.”
“Was it just the one time?”
“No.”
“What’s going on, Cameron?”
“We’re kind of sleeping together. It’s been going on for a while now.”
“That’s not like you.”
“I know, but I want it to be when I’m with him.”
“Well, I imagine you don’t want a lecture,” Cara grinned. “So, tell me about him. Tell me why you keep jumping into bed with him.”
Cameron took a sip of his wine and smiled at his sister.
“We actually stay out of bed,” he said after a pause and was rewarded with a laugh.
“What do you mean?”
“We stay out of the bedroom when we hook up.”
“Kinky.”
Cameron sipped his wine and tried not to let his mind wander.
“He’s kind to me too,” he started, smiling as he looked into his glass. “We talk and cuddle, and he listens to me. He wants to know about me, and he tells me about himself. He helps me when I’m trying to figure something out, and he’s so in tune with me it’s like he knows what I want and need before I do, and not just in the bedroom.”
“Are you sure you’re not missing his flaws because you’re so taken with him?” Cara asked seriously. “He sounds wonderful, but no one is perfect.”
“I know. He’s definitely not perfect. He can be a little arrogant when he’s talking about something he knows a lot about. He can be a bit of a know-it-all actually, and he tends to clam up when something makes him feel inferior, or like he’s not doing or handling it right. He doesn’t like to be wrong, and he really doesn’t like it when other people point out that he’s wrong. He’s kind but doesn’t handle confrontation well. He doesn’t shout or yell or say hurtful things, but he holds on to things, and it affects how he acts.”
“At least you’re seeing more than just the attention and the orgasms.”
“I see him for who he is. He’s a good man.”
“Are you dating him? You told me that you’re sleeping with him, but this sounds like more.”
“We’re seeing each other. It’s not serious, but it’s not completely casual.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
“I am.” He nodded. “It’s working for us.”
“And you’re sure you want to be with him, that it’s not just the sex and the attention he pays you? You work for him. You live in his house, and you look after his kids. That complicates things, no matter how much it’s working now.”
“I know. All of that is true, but it’s separate. I want to be with him because I enjoy it. I’m learning about myself, and it’s the first time I’ve been with a man who’s taken care of me and not just him.”
“I’m glad about that,” Cara said seriously. “You deserve a man who treats you right and puts your needs first, not just his. We’ve watched the guys you’ve dated over the years. None of them were any good for you. They didn’t treat you r
ight, and they took advantage of you, Cameron. You’ve been telling me for years about how unfulfilling your sex life is, and you never believed me when I told you that you deserved more, deserved better. You’re an adult, and you can make your own choices. I just want you to be sure you know what you’re getting in to.”
“I do.”
“Then I’m happy for you.
“Thank you.”
OVER THE NEXT FEW WEEKS, they fell into a comfortable routine. Cameron was up with the kids, and he would take them out in the mornings, making sure to keep their outings fun and educational.
The kids were really warning up to him. Logan had pretty much forgotten he’d wanted to make his life miserable, and he and Daniel were the most well-behaved and attentive boys. Kaitlyn openly adored him and always wanted to do what he was doing and be by his side.
They were opening up to him, and he loved spending his days with them. They had picnic lunches, enjoying the summer weather when they were out, and when they were at home, they would eat on the patio. In the afternoons, they’d spend as much time as they could outside, playing in the yard or in the pool, and pretty much every day there was a crowd of kids at the house.
Cameron loved having so many kids around, and it was really great for the boys and Kaitlyn to be making new friends. It was a lot of work keeping them all entertained and safe, but it was worth it.
The other kids would come with supervision, so there were always nannies and mothers sitting on the patio watching to make sure he wasn’t doing anything they didn’t approve of, and he constantly felt he was being judged.
It was a little isolating, being left out of their little circles, but he preferred to be with the kids and interacting with them, so he really didn’t mind. He’d been working at the house for over three months, and no one had reached out to him. Other than being able to identify which grown-up went with which children, he knew nothing about the adults in the neighborhood, but he knew everything about the kids.
NATHAN GLANCED OUT his window and smiled. Cameron was playing with a crowd of kids in the pool, and they were all splashing around and having fun.