The Devil's Beauty (Crime Lord Interconnected Standalone Book 2)

by Airicka Phoenix

  “I told no one,” he murmured, seemingly unaware of her. “I tried to forget it, like a bad nightmare. But every time I would see her, she’d grin at me like we shared a secret and my skin would crawl. The first time, a few weeks after it happened, I threw up. I left the meeting, saying I wasn’t feeling well, but it was her. She’d taken something from me that night. It took me years to get it back, but to this day, I couldn’t look at her without remembering.”

  She closed her eyes and squeezed him gently, just enough to remind him she was still there, that he wasn’t alone.

  “Then I found out she was pregnant and I knew right away that it was mine and I … God, help me, but I hated it. Hated seeing it growing inside her, filling and stretching her belly, this vile, disgusting thing that was created against my will. I had visions, terrible, horrific vision of…” he wheezed out a gasp and she tightened her hold, but he didn’t try to pull away. “I thought things, Ava, things you would never forgive me if I told you. Things no one should ever think about an innocent baby.”

  He was trembling. Rocking so hard, her bones rattled with the sheer force of it.

  “She brought him to me a few weeks after he’d been born, this tiny thing in blue. She looked at me, so proud of what we’d created.

  “Isn’t he beautiful?” she said. “He has your eyes.”

  I wanted to kill her. I wanted to punch my fist into her chest and tear out her heart. Instead, all I could do was tell her to stay away from me and keep her monster away from me. It wasn’t mine. I wanted no part of it. She laughed and told me I would change my mind.

  I didn’t see him again for nine years when he showed up at my door, this boy who had my eyes and too many questions. I don’t know how he found me. I don’t know what he knew, but all I could see was his mother. All I could smell was her evil coating him, running through his veins.”

  He pulled away from Ava and she let him. She stood frozen as he stumbled his way to a deck chair and dropped into it. His elbows pierced his knees and he clapped his hands over his mouth like that might stop the words from coming. His gaze fixed on something only he could see at her feet and never moved. Not even to blink.

  “I turned him away. I said … such awful things, but I couldn’t…” Tears traced the worn lines of his face and disappeared behind his hands. “I couldn’t stand the sight of him.”

  Ava could think of nothing to say, no words of comfort to give. She felt as hollow as a drum and as bottomless as a black hole.

  This was the story she’d been begging him to tell her for years, the one thing he could never seem to talk about. Now she knew and she felt no better by the knowledge. She felt no understanding. All she felt was heartbreak. For him. For Dimitri. Two men she loved with all her heart ruined by the acts of a despicable woman. How was she supposed to fix this? How was she supposed to make it better? Where was Penny?

  “You hate me.”

  Ava started out of her own uselessness to find John Paul watching her with those eyes, those sweet, kind eyes that always lit up when they saw her, eyes that held so much love and warmth. Eyes that always made her feel so protected and safe.

  “I could never hate you,” she whispered.

  “I hate me.” The words were barely a movement of his mouth.

  She sniffled. “Maybe it’s not too late. Maybe—”

  He shook his head. “I won’t ask for his forgiveness. I don’t deserve it even if he gave it. Too much has happened, too much sad. Things I can never take back.”

  “You don’t know Dimitri.” She wiped at her tears. “He’s got the most beautiful heart. He’s so much like you.”

  He lifted his head, lowered his hands, and studied her. “Would you forgive your mother?”

  That stopped her. She thought of the years of neglect, the snide, hurtful comments, the years of pretending she didn’t exist.

  “No,” she whispered, ashamed of herself.

  “Then why would he forgive me when I’ve done so much worse to him?”

  “Because he’s not me,” she said. “Because he actually wants your love.”

  “But I don’t love him.” He never looked away as he said it. “I never will. He will always be a reminder of what happened.”

  A thought occurred to her then, one that finally brought sense to everything she could never figure out.

  “Is that why you always told me he was dangerous, because you thought he would do the same to me?”

  He lowered his gaze. “He’s his mother’s son. I couldn’t trust what he was capable of. I couldn’t trust him with you, not you, Ava.” His eyes shot up to her face, fierce and intense. “I would have killed every single last one of them if he ever…” His nostrils flared with his ragged breaths. “I wasn’t going to allow him to destroy you the way his mother destroyed me.”

  She went to him and crouched down until they were eyelevel. She rested her hands on his knees, partially for balance.

  “I have loved Dimitri Tasarov in some shape or form my entire life,” she murmured. “Since I was ten years old, he’s been my best friend. I don’t know what my life would have been like without him. I don’t want to know. You and him have made me the woman I am today and I love you both so much.”

  His hand settled lovingly against the side of her face. His thumb smoothed away the tears that refused to stop falling. He peered into her eyes, so much sorrow in his.

  “I would give you the world, mon cher.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t need the world. I just want the two most important men in my life to get along.”

  His shoulders lifted with his deep inhale. He continued to stroke her cheek while he searched her eyes. Finally, he leaned in and pressed a kiss to her brow.

  “Je vais vous donner le monde, et ma bénédiction. Si tel est ce qui va vous rendre heureux.” He stroked her head and repeated himself in English. “I’ll give you the world, and my blessing. If this is what will make you happy.”

  A fresh batch of emotions blurred her vision. Her bottom lip wavered once before she mashed her entire face into his chest.

  “I love you,” she rasped into the front of his dress shirt.

  He held her tight, lips against the top of her head. “Je t’aime aussi, ma petite chou.”

  The soft scrape of shoes on concrete had her glancing over her shoulder at the familiar silhouette darkening the doorway. The sight of him had her heart leaping in her chest and then plummeting.

  He knew. He’d heard everything.

  It wasn’t on his face. There was nothing on his face. But she knew. She could feel his pain as physically as if it were her own.

  “Dimitri…”

  “I came to ask if you were hungry,” he said with an ease that hurt her soul.

  “I’ll have something brought up.”

  John Paul got to his feet. He helped Ava up to hers and then walked straight past his son and disappeared inside without a word.

  “Dimitri,” she said again, her throat tight with words she didn’t know how to say.

  He shook his head, unable to meet her gaze.

  She went to him. Her arms circled his shoulders and he let her.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered into the soft patter of his pulse.

  “I always knew.”

  She pulled back to peer into his face. “You knew?”

  “Not … that, but that he would never see me as more than a monster.”

  “But you’re not a monster,” she protested vehemently. “Why won’t you believe me? When have I ever lied to you?”

  His palm rested on the cheek still warm from John Paul’s touch. “Did it ever occur to you that maybe you’re the only one who seems to think so?”

  “No,” she said. “I don’t believe that.”

  Gentle fingers slipped beneath her chin and forced her face up further, craning her neck. “Why do you have such blind faith in me, myshka? Haven’t I hurt you enough to prove I’m no good?”

  “Because to love someone, re
ally love someone, you need to have faith in them, even when they do stupid things.”

  His entire body seemed to deflate a notch as he bowed his head until his brow touched hers. “I can’t give you the better man you deserve.”

  She shook her head. “I don’t want a better man. I want you, all of you, the monster, the devil, the man, the lover, the friend. I want all the ugly, broken, scarred pieces of you, Dimitri, because they fit with all of mine.”

  “Fuck, Ava!” His snarl was followed by the violent and bruising clamp of his mouth over hers.

  He kissed her with the madness of a man possessed. His hands closed in her hair, tearing out roots as he gripped her to him. Her insides dipped in sweet pleasure as he devoured her.

  “I love you,” he growled in between consumptions. “I fucking love you, Ava.”

  She broke the kiss, her lungs burning for air.

  “I … no.” She rummaged through the foggy mess of her mind until she found the right words. “Ya tebya lyub-lyu.”

  She hoped she’d said it right. It had been years since she’d told anyone she loved them in Russian.

  But it must have been right, because his face broke into a slow, wide grin that made her stomach flip. His lips captured hers again, gentler.

  This time, he drew back, still grinning.

  “Come,” he said, taking her hand. “Let’s get you fed.”

  She followed him back into the hotel. Only John Paul and Penny were there, but they seemed content talking about the rise of taxes coming from the east.

  “They already own half the casinos in the city.” Penny was muttering. She spotted Dimitri and quickly straightened. “Food has been ordered, sir. It should be up in twenty minutes. I’ve also booked Saeed a room in the hotel, one that allows pets, and I have instructed the clerk’s desk at the courthouse to fax those papers over to you at the office to avoid accidental information leakage.” She checked her watch. “If there’s nothing else, sir, Daniel needs me to take him to get a few scrap parts from the dump.”

  Dimitri motioned her to go ahead.

  Ava walked her to the door.

  “Thank you,” she said. “For everything.”

  Penny smiled at her. “It’s my pleasure. Let me know if you need anything else.”

  She eyed the woman. “Any idea where Ivan is hiding?”

  Penny laughed. “I wish.” She poked her glasses higher on the bridge of her nose. “But I have all my informants on the job.”

  Ava nodded. “Thank you again.”

  With a wave, Penny slipped out. One of the three men stationed outside broke away from the group and followed her.

  Ava shut the door and turned to face the two across the room, standing in awkward silence that was almost painful to bear.

  John Paul broke free first. He snatched up his blazer off the back of a nearby chair and swung it on.

  “I have an early meeting in the morning,” he said. “But I’ll swing by afterwards, around ten, if that works?”

  “Dad…”

  He walked over to her and took her face between his hands. He kissed her cheek.

  “Tomorrow.”

  Reluctant, she nodded and stepped aside to let him pass.

  A loud buzzing filled the room. They both looked back in time to watch Dimitri unearth his phone from his pants pocket and frown at the screen. The confusion never lifted, not even when he brought the device to his ear.

  “Yeah?”

  Seconds passed. The confusion dissolved into surprise. Then horror.

  His gaze snapped up and across the distance straight at Ava.

  Her heart sank. “What?”

  Wordlessly, Dimitri lowered his arm and hit something on the screen.

  A male voice plumed into the air, a cloud of toxic words that stole all the light and left a chill in the room. Even without a face, Ava recognized it.

  “We will meet in four hours and we will end everything, yes?”

  Ivan.

  Memories of him arguing with the men on the cliff rushed over her. She must have staggered back, because John Paul had her by the arm and she couldn’t recall why.

  “Where are you?” Dimitri demanded. “It’s over. Turn yourself in.”

  A low, cackling sound erupted from the bit of plastic. “I come in, he dies. Do you want me to send pieces to your whore?”

  Nothing he was saying made any sense or maybe the buzzing in her ears was too loud and she was missing things. She couldn’t be sure.

  “Who?” Dimitri didn’t seem to know either.

  There was a gurgling sound, a sickening crunch of something snapping, then an inhuman wail that sliced through Ava like a knife.

  “Say your name,” Ivan taunted in an almost sing-song tone.

  Someone was sobbing, a man. “Fuck you!”

  Ava bolted forward even though there was nothing she could do.

  “Robby!”

  “Four hours,” the voice said.

  Then the line went dead.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  “Sir, you can’t go,” Penny argued, looking nothing like herself in jeans and a t-shirt with a pair of hot kiss lips. But she’d rushed straight back from the dump and smelled of it. Not that anyone seemed to notice. “It’s a trap.”

  It was a trap. Dimitri wasn’t stupid enough not to have recognized that. But what was he supposed to do? He couldn’t not go. He couldn’t let Ivan send pieces of Robby back to Ava.

  Ava.

  He glanced over at her. She hadn’t said anything since the phone had been disconnected. She stood, arms hugging her middle, a heart wrenching silhouette against the setting sun.

  She hadn’t moved. She hadn’t asked him to save her friend. She hadn’t even looked at him.

  “Penny’s right,” John Paul said. “Robby’s, in all likelihood, dead already.”

  “This isn’t a surrender plea, sir,” Penny jumped in. “He’s not going to willingly come back with you. He knows there is no escape for him. The entire country is looking for him. You’ve cut off all means of escape. This is his final stand and whatever he has planned, you’re going to go down with him.”

  These were all things he already knew. Ivan was cornered. He was a rat being slowly roasted in a steel box. He was either going to try and burrow his way out or kill himself.

  “Sir, if I may.” Frank folded his long fingers together on the table and leaned forward. “We could have a tactical unit set up a perimeter around the structure. They can surveillance—”

  Dimitri shook his head. “We don’t have time for that, and I know my brother. There is only one way Ivan’s going to end this and I won’t put innocent men in the crosshairs. It’s me or no one.”

  “It’s suicide!” Penny cried. “We don’t even know if Robby is still alive. You could be walking in there—”

  Dimitri turned to Ava. The only voice he hadn’t heard. The only answer he would listen to.

  He went to her. He was careful when he reached to gently take her arms.

  “Myshka.” He grazed the back of her head with his lips. “I’ll do whatever you want.”

  Her spine shuddered along the length of his chest. Her shoulders stiffened.

  “What can I say?” Her voice broke. “Ask you to stay and risk losing my best friend, or ask you to go and risk losing both of you? I can’t lose you. I can’t even think…” She crushed a small fist into the place between her breasts as though the pain was physical. “But if Robby’s alive…”

  He kissed the side of her head when she broke off.

  “Okay,” he murmured. “Okay.” He said again, mind solidified on his decision. He faced the others. “I’m going. If,” he said over the immediate roar of protests, “Robby is alive, I need to get him. I’ll worry about everything else after.”

  “But, sir—”

  “If you have a better idea, I’m all ears, but as it stands, Robby is in this mess, because of me.” He turned away from Penny’s pinched expression and focused on John Paul. “
Have you heard from Ki?”

  The other man shook his head. “I’ve tried his phone, but no answer.”

  Dimitri nodded. “Keep trying.” His gaze went back to Penny. “Get a hold of every contact you have in the police. Tell them to evacuate all surrounding buildings. I don’t care what they tell people, but they need to set a wide perimeter and they have…” he checked his watch. “Three hours to do it.”

  Some of the color washed from her cheeks. “How wide?”

  Dimitri thought of his brother and the mark he would insist on leaving with his departure.

  “At least thirty blocks.”

  “Jesus.” Penny moistened her lips, catching herself. “They’ll want to send a bomb unit or a SWAT team—”

  “No, no one is allowed anywhere near that area. Tell them that is a direct order. They are to keep their men as far out of the blast zone as possible.”

  Penny fiddled with her phone, her expression torn between trying to remain professional and breaking down. She blinked rapidly behind her glasses.

  “Sir, with that kind of radius, even if you manage to get Robby and you manage to leave…”

  He didn’t let her finish. Her chin was beginning to quiver and she was trying so hard not to cry.

  “Make the call.”

  She turned away quickly and moved to the other end of the room.

  He turned to Frank. “I will ask about Killian.”

  Frank only nodded.

  The only person left was the man at the other end of the table, the one Dimitri knew he should have at least some kind of thought towards … and he had nothing. He didn’t know how to apologize for something he had no part of. He didn’t know how to explain that the only thing he’d ever wanted was for at least one of his parents to acknowledge that he belonged somewhere. He didn’t know how to do anything, except meet his father’s eyes and say nothing, because it was too late, because they were strangers, because the blood they shared meant nothing.

  They were both just two bad men who loved the same woman in different ways. That was their only saving grace. Even now when Dimitri might not come back, John Paul couldn’t muster a single word of anything. Not one word.

  Dimitri turned away.

  He walked back to Ava and turned her away from the growing dusk. She peered up at him, her face ravaged by tears. Her eyes were swollen and bloodshot. Her cheeks were pale under the crimson botches. Her shoulders trembled under his palms.