Where Forever Lies

by Tara Neideffer

  As she crawled into bed, tomorrow she would think back to her last thoughts and wonder how she could be so naïve. She would realize that life never gives out handouts. It makes you work for everything you want, everything you need, and everyone whom you love.

  Chapter 28

  With it being a Saturday, the mall was packed with weekend shoppers, everyone squeezing by each other as they went from store to store, hoping to catch some good sales. Paige and Kyra had been shopping for two hours, now, and had already gotten a chocolate chip cookie from the cookie shop and Kyra had picked out a stuffed brown and white dog, which she named Bob. Paige wasn’t sure where the name came from but it made her laugh.

  The crowd was getting to her, it seemed especially busy today, and she was hoping Kyra was almost ready to leave so they could eat and then head to the park and enjoy some sun.

  “Mommy, can I have a penny?” Kyra asked as she held her small hand out, palm up. In her other arm, she clutched Bob protectively as she stood waiting. Chocolate was smeared across her lips and chin and Paige laughed as she pulled out a napkin to clean her off.

  “Sure, but why?”

  Kyra pointed towards the fountain that was located in the middle of the mall and said, “I want to make a wish.”

  Smiling, Paige took out three pennies and placed them in her outstretched hand. “Okay, here you go.”

  She tightened her fingers around the pennies and went to run off towards the fountain when Paige grabbed her arm. “Wait for mommy. You can’t run off by yourself in a crowded mall, I’d lose you.”

  Kyra ran up to the brick wall of the fountain and stuck her finger in the cold water, squealing as she threw her three pennies into the water. She laughed when she saw the small splash they made and then went to lean over to grab more pennies when Paige grabbed her by her waist. “Kyra, you can’t go in there. It’s to look at only. Are you ready to go get some lunch and then head to the park?”

  “Park, park!” Kyra chanted as she held Bob up in the air.

  “All right, let’s go. We’ll get something to eat once we leave the mall.”

  They weaved in and out of the many shoppers at the Diamond City Mall, Paige holding tight to Kyra’s hand so she wouldn’t run off and trying to keep the couple of bags of shorts she’d bought for Kyra from hitting everyone. They finally made it to the exit and Paige stopped outside on the sidewalk as she rearranged her bags and purse, which was falling down her arm.

  “Okay, honey, we parked down the street which means we have to watch for cars, ok?” Paige lectured as she grabbed Kyra’s hand again.

  Kyra shook her head as she studied Bob in her arms, looking ready for a nap. They took off walking down the sidewalk, beside the main street that led to all the shopping centers in this area. Paige figured it was a five minute walk to get to their car and couldn’t wait. Her feet were beginning to hurt from their two hour mall walking and her stomach was growling.

  As they slowly walked down the sidewalk, Paige saw her car parked up ahead, on the opposite side of the sidewalk they were on. She sighed, wondering what had possessed her to park over there, but it was busy today and the parking lot had been full.

  All of a sudden she felt a yank on her arm and felt an empty space in her hand where Kyra’s had just been. She quickly stopped and looked down, seeing Bob rolling off into the street and the back of her daughter as she ran after him.

  “KYRA, NO!” she yelled as she dropped her things on the sidewalk. Everything was a blur, even though it all seemed to move in slow motion. She saw Bob rolling into the line of traffic; Kyra was already several steps ahead of her as she ran after him. Her auburn pony tail was swishing from side to side as her arms pumped back and forth. Paige felt adrenaline sky rocket inside her, pushing her body into motion. She looked ahead, the fear feeling like nothing she had ever felt in her life as she saw a car heading straight for Kyra. She knew it was too close to stop in time. The urgency of the situation tore through her, and even as she took off sprinting after her daughter, she felt hopeless. Everything felt out of her hands. Things were about to turn bad and she had no way of stopping it. No way of saving her baby.

  She saw her daughter stop in the middle of the street, reach down to grab Bob and saw the car not slowing down. Could he not see her? Why was he not stopping? In her mind, she had time. She had no choice but to grab her in time. She would never be able to live with herself if she didn’t. If anything happened to her daughter, she didn’t think she would be able to live, period.

  She heard the squealing of the car’s tires as he tried to stop, but failed. A scream erupted from her mouth as she watched the car hit her daughter, causing her to fall to the ground and start rolling on the hard pavement of the road. As the car finally came to a complete stop directly in her path, Paige ran into the front bumper of the car. She scurried away from it, her eyes trained only on her daughter; she felt nothing but the need to get to her. All she could see was her daughter’s yellow shorts and white shirt covered in dirt as she lay on her stomach, her body completely motionless.

  As choked sobs spilled from her mouth, she knelt down beside Kyra, feeling her back for any sign of breathing. Being a nurse, she knew not to move her but not grabbing her and pulling her into her arms was hard. She wanted to hold her, to soothe away her pain, to feel her heart beating against her chest. Her hand flew to her mouth as she felt her back rise and fall ever so slightly. Her breaths were shallow but she was breathing and Paige felt some relief at that.

  She could sense people huddling around and barely noticed when someone touched her shoulder and told her they’d called 911 for her. All she could do was rub her baby’s head and talk to her, tell her help was on its way and she wouldn’t leave her side. The pain in her chest was becoming unbearable as every second ticked by and there was still nothing coming from Kyra. She felt as if they were in their own bubble where it was just the two of them sitting here. No one else was around. All the sounds of cars honking and people talking were nonexistent. The only thing she concentrated on was watching the rise and fall of Kyra’s back, making sure she never stopped breathing.

  Someone’s grip on her shoulders brought her out of her daze and she began to fight as they tried to move her away from Kyra. “No! I can’t leave her!” she yelled as she pushed the person’s hands away. Their hands moved to her waist as they began pulling her out of the way and she began thrashing around as her view of Kyra began to dwindle.

  “Ma’am, you need to stay calm and let the EMTs do their job; they need to check your daughter out and get her to the hospital. You can ride with them but they need to evaluate her first.”

  Paige brought her attention to the guy’s soft voice as she heard him saying they needed to help Kyra. She looked up at him through a blur of tears, seeing an older guy with graying hair and wrinkles around his light blue eyes. His eyes held hers as he tried to calm her down.

  She gave him a quick nod, knowing he was right. Her fear had momentarily over-ridden her rational thinking and she took her gaze back to her daughter as she watched them assess her. She had her arms clasped tightly around her waist as she watched and every few seconds she had to wipe the tears that were crashing down on her face. If they didn’t get her into the ambulance soon, Paige wasn’t sure how much longer she’d be able to contain herself. It was taking everything she had not to barge through the circle of EMTs and grab her daughter.

  Finally, she saw them wheeling her into the back of the ambulance and her heart broke once again. Her little girl had tubes attached to her as she still lay lifeless.

  “Come on, ma’am, you can get in now,” the guy said as he nudge her forward.

  At that, Paige took off running towards the ambulance. She gripped the side of the door, resisting the EMTs help to get in, and instead she hoisted herself in with one swift motion. She sat down, tears still streaming steadily down her face and reached out and touched Kyra’s leg. There were scratches and road burn all along her bare skin and Paige
inhaled a shaky breath as she asked, “Is she going to be okay?”

  “We’re doing our best to get her to the hospital as fast as we can, ma’am. Right now we’ve got her stable,” one of the EMT women said as she continued monitoring her daughter.

  Paige didn’t know what to do. She felt so helpless right now. These strangers were doing everything they could to help save her daughter and she couldn’t step in and help. She bit her nail as worry plummeted through her. The ambulance was flying and every bump made her bounce in her seat. She wished they would go faster. The sooner the doctors stepped in, the better Paige would feel.

  They finally came to a stop, and within seconds the back door flew open. Paige hurriedly got down and stepped to the side, making room for the stretcher that was hauling Kyra. She watched everyone hustling around as they got her wheeled into the hospital. Before the stretcher was able to get out of her sight, she ran up and pushed through a couple of guys, making them come to a stop. She stood there and stared down at her daughter’s face. A big gash ran across her forehead, smaller scratches and black marks covered the rest of her face along with tubes and an oxygen mask. She leaned down and planted a kiss on her forehead and studied every inch of her face, scared to let her go and risk never seeing her again. A guy gently touched her elbow, letting her know the urgency of the situation and she drew back and watched them walk out of sight.

  As she stood there, alone in the hallway of the hospital, she felt someone come up behind her and take her arm. She looked behind her and saw the old guy from the accident scene, cradling a brown and white stuffed dog. Her eyes filled with tears as she reached out and took Bob from his hand.

  Chapter 29

  As Paige sat in the waiting room with Bob clutched in her lap, she dialed her mom’s number with shaky hands and told her everything that had happened. It seemed like forever since they had wheeled Kyra away, but it had actually only been ten minutes so far. She was praying she would hear something soon, but time seemed to be standing still right now.

  As soon as she had told her the details about the accident, her mother began sobbing in the phone, telling Paige she was on her way. Once she hung up with her mom, she called Tyler.

  “Tyler,” she said and then began sobbing again.

  “Paige? What’s wrong? What happened?” he asked, his voice lowering as her sobs took over.

  She got herself calmed down enough to say, “It’s Kyra. There was an accident. Can you come? I need you here with me.”

  “Yes, Paige. I’m on my way. Which hospital?” he asked, his voice lit with urgency.

  “We’re at Dalton Memorial,” she said, looking down at the stuffed dog on her lap and the blue emergency room sign on the wall in the hallway.

  “Is she okay?” he asked in a low voice, sounding scared at what her answer was going to be.

  “I... I don’t know, yet,” she said, her voice cracking mid-sentence as silent tears careened down her flushed cheeks.

  “It’ll be okay. I’m leaving now. I’ll be there in twenty minutes.”

  She hung up the phone feeling lost, alone and scared.

  As she waited for news and for her mom and Tyler to show up, Paige’s mind stormed with terrible thoughts about what was taking the doctors so long to come talk to her. It was all her fault this happened, she should have had a better grip on her hand when they were walking down such a busy street. She was stupid to park so far away. She dropped her face into her hands and began crying again. She felt an anxiety attack wanting to creep up but she did her best to hold it down. She couldn’t lose herself when Kyra needed her. She had to be strong for her right now.

  As she was pacing the small waiting room, she heard her mom yell her name as she walked in, her eyes wide with concern.

  “Have you heard anything yet?” her mom asked as she pulled her into a hug.

  “No, not yet,” Paige said, crying again.

  “Well, she’ll be okay,” her mom said, as if stating it confidently would make all the difference.

  They took a seat, neither saying a word as they held onto one another for support. The wait was beginning to drive her mad. “I’m going to see if I can get any information. I can’t take this any longer,” she told her mom. As she got up and walked out of the waiting room, she bumped into Tyler.

  “Paige, is everything okay?” he asked, grabbing both her arms as he studied her face. His jaw was clenched and his face was tight with concern and Paige wanted to bury her fears in him.

  “I haven’t heard anything yet. I was on my way to ask about her,” she said as she lost herself in his arms. Her tears started again as she said, “I’m just so scared, Tyler. It’s all my fault, I should have been holding onto her hand tighter.”

  His arms tightened around her as he said, “No, no, Paige. It was an accident. It wasn’t your fault. What exactly happened?” he asked as he held her hand and started walking to find someone to get some answers from.

  As they walked to the nurse’s station, Paige filled him in on everything, reliving the horror of that moment. She wiped her nose with her tattered tissue as they got to the nurse’s station, and then asked the nurse at the desk, “I need to know if my baby is okay. Can someone please tell me what’s going on?”

  The nurse asked for her daughter’s name, reassuring Paige that she would get someone out here as soon as possible. “Thank you,” she whispered and they turned to leave, slowly walking down the hall to where her mom was waiting for her.

  “It’s all going to be okay, Paige. She’ll get through this,” Tyler said as he bent down and kissed her on the top of the head.

  As they rounded the corner to the waiting room, Paige sucked in a sharp breath as she saw the doctor standing there waiting for her. She quickened her steps, feeling like she couldn’t get to him fast enough. “Doctor, is my baby okay?” she asked frantically.

  He motioned for her to take a seat, and with Tyler urging her down, she hesitantly sat, her eyes fixed on the doctor’s as he looked at her with too much sympathy. Her heart sank at his expression. It didn’t look good. She clutched her chest, feeling her heart breaking in half. “Tell me how she is, please?” she begged, as she held her mom’s hand with one hand and Tyler’s with the other.

  “Mrs. Griffin,” he began, “your daughter has suffered a skull fracture, her left leg is broken, along with a couple of ribs, and she is badly bruised, but after running several tests, I do not see anything life threatening at the moment. Of course we need to keep an eye out for any swelling of the brain but as of right now she is doing okay, considering the circumstance. She is in her room now, sleeping, so she won’t know you’re here, but you can go in and see her.”

  Paige began crying again, this time out of reassurance that her daughter was going to be okay. She felt her mom squeeze her hand and felt Tyler rub her back, trying his best to soothe her. She jumped up, ready to get to Kyra, to touch her and see with her own eyes that she was alive and okay.

  As she hurried down the hall towards Kyra’s room, her mind kept telling her that this was a horrible nightmare and she would wake up soon with Kyra safe and sound in her bed, with her comforter, portraying a mix of different cartoon animals, pulled up to her chin as she slept safe and sound. But as she turned the corner and stepped into the room, all the tubes coming out of her made her look lifeless and frail, proving that she really was living in the nightmare. With each beep of the machine, each tube her eyes fell on, and every bruise that covered her daughter, she knew there was no escaping this reality.

  She rushed over to her and lightly touched her pale cheek. She couldn’t believe this had all happened on a day when they were supposed to be enjoying their day together. She couldn’t believe it had happened, period.

  She tucked Bob under the cover beside her so Kyra would have it when she woke up. Her eyes took her all in. She was breathing, she was alive and the doctor said everything looked okay despite what had happened to her. She thought back to the accident. She knew the car wa
sn’t going really fast, they were on the side roads that surrounded the mall area, plus she knew he was trying to slow down. All that must have factored in to help Kyra’s injuries not being life threatening. She was lucky and Paige was grateful.

  Her mom stood on the other side of Kyra, holding her hand and absently wiping her face as tears streamed down. Tyler’s arm was around her shoulders as he stared at Kyra, and Paige was thankful that he could come and be by her side while she was dealing with this. She had her mom here with her, but having Tyler gave her something that her mom couldn’t give her. He was the calmness in her stormy mind. He gave her the strength she needed to overcome all the obstacles that hit her. She reached up and kissed him. “Thank you, for coming. It really means a lot to me to have you here.”

  He pulled her into his arms and breathed, “I’m just glad she’s okay.”

  As the minutes turned to hours and still no sign of Kyra waking up, Paige’s nerves were beginning to consume her. It was getting late and she was exhausted but there was no way she could sleep right now, so she sat in the uncomfortable chair next to Kyra’s bed, praying she would see some movement out of her soon. She didn’t want to fall asleep and miss out on Kyra opening up her eyes.

  Her mom had gone down to the cafeteria to get something to drink and Tyler sat on the other side of Kyra, dozing off and on. She had told her mom she could leave and that she would call her when Kyra woke up, but her mom was adamant that she was not leaving until she saw Kyra’s beautiful blue eyes.

  She heard a rustling noise from Tyler and looked over to see him moving around. He yawned, stretched and then said, “I’m going down to get some coffee, do you want me to bring you something back?”

  She shook her head, “No, I’m fine.”

  He came around to her side, gave her a kiss, and slowly shuffled out the door.