Somehow my hand latched onto his arm. Then he was forced up against the wall and my body was caging him in.
The stubble on Sebastian’s chin was rough against my fingers as I angled his face to mine. His eyes were blown wide, his breaths releasing in heavy pants.
“Just one more fucking taste.” I seized his mouth in a hungry kiss. As my tongue breached his lips I was rewarded with a hoarse and guttural groan. My tongue swept over his teeth and gums, from one side of his mouth to the other, attempting to memorize all of him.
My fingers gripped his shirt as I sank my body firmly against his. I could feel his thick cock slide against my groin as I straddled his leg and nipped at his neck and chin and lips. Sebastian moaned and opened wider for me and I slipped my tongue deeply inside his mouth, tasting all of him. The sweat and leather, the longing and desperation.
By the time we came up for air, I didn’t know how long we had been in that hallway against that wall. “Fuck, I’ve missed this mouth.”
“I’m sorry,” he murmured, as his hand connected again with my neck and his lips continued to devour mine. “I’m so fucking sorry. For what I did. For what he did. You deserve better, more.”
His words made my heart stutter and my legs go weak. When I staggered back, his eyelids were slits, making him look as dazed as I felt. “Come home with me, please,” he pleaded.
My shoulders stiffened. I wanted that. Really fucking wanted it but, “I can’t…I don’t want to be hurt by you.”
“Fuck, Tate. I don’t plan on hurting you,” he said as his lips skimmed my jaw. His breath fanned across my ear. “I just want you. I want to show you how beautiful you are. I want everything with you.”
My pulse pounded at my throat from his words. “I…”
“It’s okay. I understand,” he said, dragging his body away. His voice sounded so broken. “If you see Annie, let her know that I left.”
30
Sebastian
Just as I was about to switch off the light on the bedside stand, there was a series of light raps at my door. I sat up straight in my bed, my pulse thrumming at my neck.
I rushed to pull on pajama bottoms and nearly stumbled over a pair of shoes as I made it to the door. My eye to the peephole, my heart tripped over itself at the sight of Tate, his bottom lip between his teeth, his hands resting stiffly at his sides as if he was unsure if he’d made the right decision. I clicked the lock before he changed his mind and thrust open the door.
Without even waiting for him to speak, my palm connected with his shoulder and I tugged him against me, wanting to smell him and feel his warmth.
“You’re here.” After I forced the door shut my forehead landed on his neck, my words muffled into his skin. “I’m so fucking glad you’re here.”
“Well when you get a guy painfully hard in a dingy club entryway,” he mumbled into my shoulder. His arms lifted and he finally returned the hug, circling around my waist.
I couldn’t help the laugh that reverberated through my chest. I kissed his cheek and pulled him deeper into my embrace.
His eyes sprang to mine, his body rigid as if nervous that he said the wrong thing. “I…I didn’t mean to just barge in like this. You didn’t exactly wait at the club, you just kind of stormed out.”
“I didn’t want to beg,” I said, my eyes darting down to the floor.
“I like when you beg,” he said, his fingers clamping on my jaw as he yanked my lips to his. I moaned into his mouth and rested my weight against him.
He hummed as my fingers grasped for purchase on his back, my nails digging into his skin, like I needed to make sure he was real.
His hands dragged down to my ass, pulling me against him. When our cocks ground against each other I was instantly aroused. It felt so fucking perfect to be touching him. I didn’t think it would happen again.
“God Tate, what in the hell are you doing to me?” I grunted into his neck.
“What am I doing to you?” He rumbled against my throat. “Jesus, hearing you say those things made me want you so bad but I was scared too. Or stubborn. I don’t know. I just knew I had to come. You make me want to…”
“Want to what?” I mumbled, my skin tingling from his gruff voice.
“I want to devour you,” he growled. “Take you apart in pieces, make you come all over my tongue. Make you want me as much as I want you.”
His words cut off with a groan as my fingers fumbled for the zipper on his jeans, and tugged it down. I would show him just how fucking much I wanted him as I sank to my knees and anchored his back against the door.
Lowering his pants from his waistline down his hips, I studied his cock as it bowed upward, tall and proud against his abdomen. My thumb swiped across the head, where a perfect bead of cum had escaped.
“Damn,” he whispered. “Sebastian, you don’t have to—”
“Did anyone ever tell you, you talk too damn much? If I didn’t want to, I wouldn’t,” I said. “I’ve never done this before but I want to try. Please let me try.”
“Well fuck,” he said, shivering. “When you put it like that. Go for it.”
I waited for his eyes to settle on mine before I leaned forward to take my first taste. I licked along the slit and then circled the head. A hint of pre-come burst across my tongue. It was bitter and salty and for some reason my own cock jumped in my pants.
I had never gotten down on my knees for a man but I was so turned on, I only did what felt natural as I sucked gingerly on the crown, increasing the pressure as I became more comfortable. He didn’t seem to have any complaints as his forearms braced the door behind him.
“Mmmmm, I’ve dreamed about tasting you like this,” I said, before stuffing half of his shaft in my mouth and laving it with my tongue.
“Well, fuck, that’s just—” he mumbled, clutching onto my hair as my mouth adjusted to the weight of him and sucked earnestly. I wouldn’t tell him how many pornos I had watched imagining being able to please him like this.
I knew not to use my teeth except maybe for an extra kick at the end, the way it had been done to me by a couple of past lovers.
“I would lie in bed and think about you,” I said, licking his bulk lengthwise. “Think about your lips and your tongue. How it tasted in my mouth. How much I craved kissing you again.”
“Aren’t you just the talker now?” he grunted, as his cock began jerking in my hand. “Goddamn.”
I could taste more pre-come on my tongue and I reveled in the fact that I was turning him on. When I looked up to search his face, his eyes were slits and his nostrils were flaring as he breathed in steadily.
“I couldn’t get you out of my head, and I hated the thought of never talking to you again,” I said, taking a long, slow lick around his balls, which were expertly shaved, no doubt on a routine basis. I continued up and down each side of his shaft, around the base, and then circled the head.
“Damn. You sure you haven’t done this before?” he asked, his thumb brushing against my cheek.
“You’re my first,” I whispered and he moaned.
I relaxed my jaw as his fingers dug into my hair and my hands reached behind him to squeeze his cheeks. They were smooth and firm and I wanted to get my own look at his ass, but I’d have to wait for another time.
“Fuck, Sebastian.” When he whimpered, I could feel him tense. He was going to come. A shudder quaked through him, and as my fingers gripped his ass tightly against me, the tang hit my tongue.
I was taken aback by the amount of come gushing against my tongue and though I had every intention of swallowing, it was just too much of everything at once.
I shifted my head and allowed the rest of the come to dribble down my chin to my thighs, soaking into the cotton of my pajama bottoms.
“Sorry,” he rasped out. “Didn’t mean to—you don’t have to—”
Before he could finish his sentence, I bent forward again and licked around his crown, my tongue digging in his slit at the leftover come there. T
asting it a second time was different. Better even.
“Shit,” Tate ground out. “Holy fuck.” He grasped for my chin and tugged my mouth away from his sensitive cock before sliding down the door to my level.
“Come here.” His fingers connected with my nape and he hauled my lips to his mouth, his tongue digging deep and no doubt, tasting himself on me.
It felt more overwhelmingly intimate than anything ever had before. His fingers skated down my back to my waist and he tugged me forward so that I was straddling him. We stayed that way clinging and kissing and nuzzling until we were both limp and breathless.
31
Sebastian
“Want to feel you naked next to me,” Tate said when we finally made it off the floor.
My bottoms were messy from his come and felt like a restriction against my leaking cock, so I immediately pushed them down my hips. After Tate struggled out of his jeans and shirt, we stood staring at each other. My skin was darker, my chest and groin hairier, and as he looked me up and down, I watched his cock thicken again.
I reached for his hand and tugged him toward my bedroom. At my door, he released my fingers and slid behind me, groaning into my neck, and nudging his cock against my ass. “Damn you feel good.”
His fingers threaded through the hair on my chest and then slipped down to brush against the patch at my groin, making me shudder. “So sexy.”
He swiped his thumb across the tip of my leaking cock and then raised it to his lips.
“Fuck,” I whispered. So hot.
As soon as I turned to watch him, his mouth latched onto mine, while his hands burrowed in my hair. Our tongues licked and tasted and battled, as our cocks aligned and slicked against one other. I nearly came right then and there so I dragged my mouth away to get some needed air, resting my forehead against his shoulder.
I might’ve been new at this but he didn’t make me feel like a novice, he just made me feel wanted. And that flicker of electricity brightened sharply in my chest, heightening my profound need for him in ways I had never imagined.
His fingers raked across my jaw as he sank his tongue in my mouth again. He shifted into the room and fell back on the bed, with me on top, and our cocks nestled together.
“Fuck, wait,” I said, pulling back and trembling with raw need. “I’m going to come right now if this continues.”
“Get over here,” he said as he clutched my hips and hauled me toward his chest.
“What are you…” Understanding dawned as he attempted to arrange me, my thighs straddling his chest, my length digging into his jaw. “Oh God.”
Tate tenderly kissed the crown as if worshipping it and I panted openly as he stared into my eyes. “I can’t wait to taste your come in my mouth,” he said as he flicked his tongue up and down my length and then dug it into the slit at the top.
My back arched attempting to keep myself together but it was no use because I was a shaky, trembling mess. I clutched my thighs and groaned loudly, trying not to ram my cock down his throat.
“Mmmmmm….” The noises he made as he devoured my cock made me squirm and moan.
His hands traveled to the back of my thighs and then palmed my ass, yanking me forward, encouraging me to fuck his mouth. “Oh shit…I can’t…this feels amazing.”
When his pinky finger edged to the crease of my ass and touched my hole, I was a goner. I had never been so turned on in my entire life. I felt the heat traveling up my spine, lighting my entire body on fire and I threw my head back, stars exploding in front of my eyes. “Uhhhhhhhhh.”
As my come filled his mouth and slid down his throat, he groaned and sucked harder, attempting to taste every last drop. My chest heaved and I fell forward bracing my forearms against the sheets on either side of his head. “Nothing has ever felt like that before. Holy fuck.”
He kept my cock in his mouth and gentled his tongue circling the head until I whimpered and asked him to stop. I felt flayed open as I rolled over on the opposite side of the bed and he rose to his knees fisting his own leaking cock.
“Goddamn you’re sexy, Sebastian,” he rasped. “I need to come.”
He pumped on his length, his chest and neck flushed, as he looked down at me and his mouth hung open.
My fingers gripped his hip as I watched him. “So hot.”
His cock jerked in his hand spraying hot seed over my stomach and hip. I looked down at the pattern in awe and swiped my finger along my skin, where his come had left a jagged trail.
When my tongue flicked out to get another taste of him, he hummed and fell back against the pillow, his arm above his head and his leg bent at the knee.
Panting beside him, I felt the need to still be connected with him in some way. I reached out with my fingers and traced over his toes around to his heel and then up the back of his muscled calf, feeling the soft downy hair.
He chuckled breathlessly at the ticklish sensation and captured my hand in his. He lifted it to his mouth and kissed my fingers before loosely interlacing our hands and bringing them to rest across his chest.
My breath hitched in my throat at the intimate action and when our eyes met again I leaned forward and lazily kissed his jaw and then his lips.
He reached for the tissue on the nightstand and swiped off my stomach and thighs, and then gently kissed my mouth, his fingers at my temples, his tongue rubbing tenderly against mine.
He drew away, his thumbs brushing beneath my eyes as if to trace the shadows I knew were always there. “You haven’t been sleeping very well.”
It was a statement, not a question, so I kept my mouth closed as I stared down at him.
With his face scrubbed clean of makeup, I was able to study the angles and contours of his face. His eyelashes curled upward and his cheekbones were prominent all on their own. His lips were a bit swollen from our kissing and my thumb brushed against his mouth.
I wanted to cherish him, make him mine, but I didn’t even know where we stood at this point. Sure, we had given into our passion for one another but that didn’t mean he was ready for me to be in his life.
“Tate,” I murmured against his ear, kissing and nuzzling his neck. “I missed you. I don’t know…”
“Shhhhh,” he said, rubbing his fingers along my nape. “Just lay down.”
I easily sank into his warmth so that he could pull me against him. Feathering his fingers through my hair, he kissed the top of my head in another tender gesture that made my chest feel strangely funny.
“Stay with me,” I whispered, almost to myself as he continued to trace his fingernails over my scalp and neck and back until I went slack in his arms.
After another minute, I felt his slow and steady breaths against my cheek and I didn’t want to shut my eyes for dread this was all a dream and he didn’t come to my place in the middle of the night.
I feared I’d never again feel his lithe body in my arms, or his toned legs entwined with mine. Eventually I shut my eyes, reveling in how fucking perfect it felt to have him in my bed.
But just like my worst nightmare, the sheets beside me were empty the following morning.
32
Tate
Sebastian had been sleeping so soundly that he hadn’t heard me climb out of bed. So I walked around the corner to get us breakfast. I remembered Annie talking about it that time at the diner, how Sebastian always brought them coffee and bagels from Murray’s. Since Sebastian was possibly resting peacefully for the first time in a long while, I decided to do something nice. I didn’t know why, except maybe that he just brought it out in me. By now I would’ve been long gone, not out and about getting sustenance for my lover.
Lover. Is that what he was?
Sebastian was certainly voracious. Had even turned over in bed sometime before dawn, grasped for my jaw and we started making out again. He sank on top and we rubbed our cocks together until we shot our loads one after the other. I fell back to sleep after he used his T-shirt from the floor, the shirt I made him, to clean us up. When
I scoffed, he laughed and said he would think of me even more now when he wore it.
Gripping the bag, I let myself back inside, attempting to be quiet and allowing him to sleep. Except, I had startled him. His back had been to me in the kitchen where he only wore a pair of grey sweat pants that hung loosely on his hips. “Fuck, Tate, what the hell?”
“Sorry,” I said, confused as to why he was so surprised. “I got us some bagels and coffee from your favorite shop.”
“You what?” He whirled on me and I saw an assembly of emotions on his face. From anger to relief to happiness.
“You thought I left,” I said, placing the bag and drink carrier on his counter.
“No, I...” he sighed and sagged into the counter. “Yeah, I did. I would’ve deserved it.”
“Hey,” I said, stepping into his space. I wanted nothing more than to wipe that frown off his mouth. “Let’s not keep rehashing it. I’m here because I want to be. But let’s get one thing squared away: I forgive you.”
“You do?” he asked, and the gratitude on his face made my chest feel tight as a fist.
“You’re not a calculating person,” I said, touching his skin, my fingers skating up and down his chest where a patch of dark hair was velvety soft. He was a beautiful man. “I know you didn’t mean everything that happened.”
“I can’t help thinking in some twisted way, Alan brought us together.” He sighed resting his head against my shoulder. “I wouldn’t have gotten to know you otherwise.”
“Let’s not drag that bastard’s name into every conversation,” I said, feeling my gut stiffen in anger again. “Please.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry,” he said, taking a step away. “I’m just a person who likes to understand things. How people respond to shit that happened in their lives. How it leads them on a certain path and makes them who they are. It’s the social worker in me.”
The Hardest Fall (Roadmap to Your Heart Book 3) Page 16