by Marie Easton
“Okay, sweet boy, let’s find your daddy so he knows where you are.”
We wandered around and he continued to hold my hand. A photographer from a local magazine came up and snapped our picture.
I spotted Javier across the room with Ricardo. “There he is.”
We walked through the masses of people until we reached them.
Javier saw us coming and smiled. “Hello, you two,” he said and kissed my cheek.
“Hello.” I smiled up at him, drinking in how handsome he looked in his tux.
I turned to Ricardo and Veronica. “Hi, you guys.” I hugged Veronica. “You look lovely.” She had on a mint green cocktail dress and a matching scarf that had sheer mesh overlaid on the satin material.
“Thank you. You look amazing yourself.” Her smile was bright as always.
“Hi, Kayla. You look beautiful.” Ricardo kissed my cheek as well.
“Thank you. You’re both very handsome this evening.” I responded in kind to Javier and Ricardo. “Javi doesn’t like the food here. He would rather have a Happy Meal. Do you mind if I take him?”
“Is that true?” Javier glanced at Javi who still held my hand.
He nodded again, confirming my statement.
“I'll need the car seat though,” I said.
“I'll have the limo take you.”
“The limo?” I questioned.
“I didn’t want to risk driving after having a few drinks so I rented a limo for the night.”
“Well, I hope the driver can get through the drive-thru.” I laughed. “Come on, Javi. Let’s go get you something that you like to eat.”
Javier took out his phone and called for the limo to be brought to the front of the showroom. Javi and I waited near the main doors until it pulled up. We got in and I told the driver to take us to the closest McDonald’s.
On the way, I asked Javi, “Do you want chicken nuggets or a hamburger?”
“Chicken nuggets.”
We were about a block away from McDonald’s when I heard screeching tires. I glanced out the window and saw a car sliding toward us. I grabbed Javi. I pushed him forward toward the front of the limo. I heard the crash as I fell onto the floor. Something landed on me.
My chest felt like it’d explode. I can’t breathe. I started to panic. I heard Javi crying, but I couldn’t talk. The world went black.
~ ~ ~
When I woke, I heard sawing, metal on metal. I gasped, trying to get air into my lungs. The intense pain meant I only managed small breaths of air.
Javi kept crying. I focused on finding him, but I didn’t see him nearby. I couldn’t yell for him since I didn’t have enough air to speak. I heard the screech of metal, more sawing and finally glimmering light.
“Ma’am, we’re here to help you. We’ll get you out of here as fast as we can.”
Finally, I felt hands on me pulling me out of the dark space. I was eased onto a backboard with a collar wrapped around my neck. Someone placed an oxygen mask on my face. I still struggled for air.
“Her oxygen saturations are low. It looks like she has significant trauma to the right side of her chest.”
A siren screamed as the ambulance bounced around. We were moving fast. I reached up to take off the mask.
“No, leave the mask alone. We’re giving you oxygen. Take some deep breaths.”
I tried, but it hurt too much. I tried to speak. “Javi?” It was barely a whisper. I didn’t know if the medic heard me. I tried again. “Javi?”
“Don’t talk right now. We’re going to take good care of you.”
We stopped abruptly and the doors opened. They pulled the gurney out of the back of the ambulance and were running as we entered the hospital. There were people everywhere and lots of noise and talking.
Someone said, “Take a deep breath and hold it.”
Were they kidding? I can hardly breathe and they want me to hold it? A doctor spoke, “Set up a chest tube. She has several broken ribs and right lung is down.”
They cut my dress off and I felt very cold liquid on my skin. Excruciating pain when they shoved a chest tube into my lung. Suddenly, I could breathe. I yelled. “Javi! Where is Javi?”
“Be calm, ma’am.”
“No! Where is Javi?”
“Is that the little boy?”
“Yes, yes, he was the little boy with me! Oh God, please tell me he is okay!”
“He’s being checked out right now.” One of the nurses said.
“Call his dad. Tell him what happened. He needs his dad. Do you hear me?”
“Okay, okay, what’s his number?”
“Give me my phone.”
The nurse opened my purse and pulled out my phone. I pushed the return call button and tried to hold the phone to my ear, but the collar was in the way.
The doctor took the phone from me. “I’ll explain the situation to him. What is his name?”
“Javier Fuentes,” I answered.
“Hello? Mr. Fuentes? This is Doctor Hernandez. I'm here with your son and wife at Mass General. There was a motor vehicle accident. The vehicle your wife and son were in was t-boned by another vehicle. Mr. Fuentes? Mr. Fuentes, are you there?” The doctor ended the call, placed it again. “Mr. Fuentes? Who is this that I am speaking with? Ricardo, are you a family member? Okay, please drive safely. Yes, he’s getting x-rays to be sure, but otherwise he’s doing fine. She’s in stable condition.” He ended the call and returned to my bedside.
“Your husband and someone named Ricardo are on their way. We’re going to take you to Radiology for more thorough imaging.”
I was wheeled out of the emergency room and to the Radiology Department. All I could think about was Javi. I’d never forgive myself if something happened to him. A tear ran down my face and the radiographer apologized for hurting me. That wasn’t the reason I was crying, but I didn’t try to explain.
When they finished, I was transported back to the emergency room. As soon as I got there, I saw Javier.
“Javier?” I started trying to apologize. “Javier, I’m sorry. I tried to get him out of the way. I shouldn’t have taken him with me. I should have gone alone.”
“Stop talking.” He took my hand and lightly kissed my lips. “It's because of you that he’s okay. The limo driver said you pushed Javi out of harm’s way or he’d have been seriously hurt.”
Then, I saw Ricardo walk up holding Javi. His little face was red and blotchy from crying and he was dirty from being pulled out of the wreckage.
“Hi, little man.” I struggled to smile at him. “Are you okay?”
He nodded, but started crying again and turned his face into Ricardo’s shoulder.
“He's fine, Kayla, just scared,” Javier said.
“I'm sorry,” I repeated and started to cry.
He wiped away the tears trickling down my face. “You’ve nothing to be sorry for, Kayla. I'm glad you weren’t hurt worse.”
“I'm fine.”
“Well, you have a chest tube so you aren’t that fine.”
“You need to get back to the dinner. I'll be fine.”
“Stop pushing me away, Kayla, because I’m not going anywhere. The show will go on without me. Rafael will speak on my behalf.”
“Now, I know you need to go.”
We both laughed, but it hurt and I groaned. The nurse came in and put pain medicine in my IV.
“We’ll be moving you to your room now.” She lifted the brake and pushed my stretcher until we arrived at my room. They moved me over onto a bed. It felt great to be off the backboard and have her remove the neck collar.
“Ricardo, why don’t you take Javi home while I stay with Kayla?”
“No,” I said. “I'll just sleep with all of th
ese pain meds anyway. Take him home. He won’t want to be without you.”
Javier and Ricardo looked at each other, but didn’t speak. Javier stepped out of the room with Ricardo for a few minutes. When he returned, he said, “We'll be with you until Rafael and Antonio get here. They’ll stay until I come back in the morning.”
“Thank you.” Comforted by his concern, I drifted off to sleep with Javier sitting next to me holding my hand.
Chapter 31
When I awoke, Rafael and Antonio slept in the pull-out chairs in my room. I looked around wondering what time it was. It was only a couple of minutes later that Javier came walking in with Javi. They had McDonalds bags filled with breakfast sandwiches with them and the smell was delightful.
Javier smiled when he walked in. “Good morning, darlin’.” He leaned over the bedrail and kissed me.
“Good morning,” I replied with a smile. “How’s Javi?”
Javier picked up the little boy so he could see me.
“Good morning, little man. Did you bring breakfast?”
“Yep.” He still looked scared.
I tried to look as happy as I could. “Go wake up those snoring boys.”
Javier set him down and Javi went over to Rafael and nudged him.
Rafael opened his eyes and saw the little boy staring at him. “Well hello, handsome. What is that fabulous smell?”
“Food,” Javi stated plainly.
We all laughed as we watched Javi. I pushed the button on my bed and sat it up slowly. Javier handed everyone breakfast sandwiches and coffee. Javi climbed on his daddy’s lap and I noticed he had McDonald’s pancakes and eggs. I smiled as he enjoyed every bite.
A few hours later, Ricardo walked in with my sister. I hadn’t expected she’d drop everything and come out here.
“Hey there, trouble.” Dawn kissed my forehead and took my hand in hers. “I was frantic when Javier called me last night.”
“I'm fine. Really.”
“I know, but I was still scared.”
“I'll be put together by the wedding. I promise.”
“I wasn’t even worried about that. I'm just glad you're okay.” She looked around the room and then introduced herself to Rafael and Antonio. She saw the little boy who’d stolen my heart. She knelt down and smiled at him. “You must be Javi.”
He hid his face behind his dad, suddenly shy.
“Say hello, Javi,” Javier pulled him out from behind him.
Javi looked up a little. His voice was small and sweet. “Hi.”
“I heard you love Transformers,” Dawn said to him.
He nodded.
Her question reminded me that he had his Optimus Prime with him when we left for food last night. “Javi, did you lose Optimus in the car last night?”
He nodded at me.
“We’d better make a call to Santa and see if he has another one,” I told him.
He grinned at me with a sparkle in his eye at the thought of Santa coming soon.
Dawn stood up and looked at Javier. “I can see why she’s so crazy about this little guy. He’s as handsome as his father and we all know how she feels about you.”
Javier smiled at her. “You think she is crazy about me?”
“Just a little.”
“Um, I’m right here, and I can hear you.”
They both laughed, but neither one of them looked over at me.
“Please say the parental units aren’t coming out here too.”
This time she turned and looked at me. “No. I didn’t tell Mom about the accident because I knew you wouldn’t be in any shape for her guilt trips. I told her I was visiting you so we could do some last minute shopping before the wedding.”
“And Dad? What does he think?”
“I'm sure he thinks the same. I don’t talk much with him, but you know Mom keeps him in the loop.”
“So all is forgiven as far as Dad’s bad behavior is concerned?”
Dawn looked at me with sadness in her eyes. “Kayla, Mom doesn’t know how to live without him. Why do you think she turns her head when there’s a new girlfriend in the picture?”
“She knows about Dad’s affairs?” I said, completely surprised I wasn’t the only one aware of my dad’s indiscretions.
“Kayla, really. She isn’t stupid. She turns her head and makes excuses, but she knows.”
“What about what he did to me and Javier? Will she just turn her head to that too?”
“I don’t think she forgives it, but I know she’ll shut it out rather than risk losing the only life she has ever known.”
“And you? How do you feel about Dad?”
“Disappointed and angry, but I can’t continue holding onto all of this. I need to look at my future and all the good things to come.” She sat on the side of the bed and took my hand.
I thought about what she said, but I still had trouble moving forward and letting the past live in the past. I knew my sister. She had difficulty not seeing the good in the people around her. Even when she is mad. I told myself that Dawn wouldn’t go back on her word about Dad.
~ ~ ~
A few hours later everyone left except for Dawn. We talked about the wedding. I told her when she got to the condo to check out the dress Antonio made for me. As we chatted, my sister’s face glowed when she talked about Bradley. I was happy for her and even looked forward to her wedding.
“So, what’s the problem?” Dawn blurted out after we exhausted talk about her wedding.
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I understand why Steven had a hard time with this situation because when you and Javier are in a room together, everyone feels the electricity.” Dawn paused and looked at me. “So, what’s keeping you two apart?”
I looked down at my hands. “We're taking things slow. It’s more complicated now.”
“Complicated. Are we talking about Javi?”
“Yes.”
“He seems like a good little boy.”
“He is. He’s adorable.”
“So which part is complicated?”
“All of it.”
“More words, Kayla.” Dawn had a stern tone I didn’t even know she possessed. Actually, she’d started to sound like my shrink.
“It’s not just me and Javier anymore. He has an ex-wife and a child.”
“Lots of people have ex-wives and children, Kayla. What’s the real problem?”
“I don’t know. I guess it’s me.”
“You how?"
I shrugged my shoulders and I felt frustrated. “He already had a life with someone else. I just feel so sad that none of it was with me. Nothing will be with me for the first time.”
“I believe he was your first.”
“But, I wasn’t his, and nothing else will be a first with me and only me either.”
“If memory serves, it didn’t really matter that you weren’t his first time. In fact, there were probably some significant benefits to that.”
I sniffled and laughed a little. “True. Good point.”
“Is it fair to consider that maybe other things in life are better with a little experience as well?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “I don’t know, maybe, I guess.”
“If I remember correctly, you were someone that lived life regardless of what rules were set down in front of you. That’s why you have so many amazing memories with Javier. You know better than any of us how fragile, and sometimes short, life can be. Don’t waste time on semantics and rules. Just be happy.”
Dawn sat on the side of the bed and I rested my head on her shoulder. How did she get so wise? She was right. I was caught up in what’s supposed to be right and wrong, not on what made me happy.
W
e sat quietly as I replayed our conversation in my mind. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to get back what I lost.”
“You’re not getting back what you lost. You’re participating in what is already there.”
I fell asleep still considering everything my little sister said. When I woke the next morning, it was to an empty room. I looked out the window and realized the sadness I felt right now came from missing my friends and family.
The only thing keeping me away was myself. The fear of being hurt again, but life always held some pain and disappointment. I heard my door open and I glanced over to see who it was. Javier walked in. He stood at the doorway for a minute, giving me a sideways grin. I smiled back at him.
“Good morning, carina.”
“Good morning. Shouldn’t you be at work?”
“I’m the boss. I come and go when I want. Besides, the grand opening was a huge success and we had record sales.”
“Wow, that’s great.”
Javier pulled up a chair and took my hand in his. “How are you doing?”
“Physically, I'm doing well.”
“And emotionally?”
I paused for a moment. “Emotionally, I miss you.”
He smiled at me and kissed my hand. “I’m right here.”
The door opened again and Dr. Hernandez walked in. “Good morning. How are you feeling today?”
“Better. How much longer will I have the chest tube?” I asked, anxious to have it removed so I could go home.
“I’d like to turn it off and take it out today. If you do well and the lung stays up, we can let you leave tomorrow.”
“Great.” I said with relief.
“How’s your little boy doing?”
I paused, not expecting to be asked about Javi. “Um, he is doing well.” I looked at Javier who was still grinning at me.
“Good, I'm glad. I thought you were going to wrestle with all of us to get to him the night you came in.”
Javier’s smile increased. “It’s a good thing you calmed her down. She’s pretty tough, you know.”