The Secrets We Keep

by Melinda Owens

  She couldn’t face him over supper after a kiss like that, so she’d run—gone back home. Of course, Sunny had known. She’d called that night to talk about it, and Dusty had brushed it off as no big deal when in reality, she had never been so jealous of her sister in her life.

  She hadn’t seen her sister alive again.

  Dusty had run back to New Orleans, where she’d been living in the French Quarter in a dumpy apartment with eight other people.

  That was her life back then. She went where the fun was. New Orleans had been fun.

  “Sunny’s death changed everything for me, too, you know. I’m not the same girl I was before that. You’re not the only one who changed, Theo. I just want you to know that. No reason for it, just wanted you to know.” She heard her voice wobble at the end of her little speech, which didn’t make the man look at her at all, and frustrated with the awkwardness still permeating her space, she spun on her heel, grabbed her wineglass, and retreated to her room.

  Fuck her.

  All the hatred rose to the surface as she slammed her door, shutting him out. Fine.

  She was right about one thing, though. He and Sunny had moved incredibly fast.

  He’d met Sunny in the coffee shop by his office, where she was a barista. He’d made her his morning routine until she’d agreed to go out on a date with him. He found out she was saving money to go to school. He moved her into his apartment the next week. It was out of character for them both, but it had felt so right.

  She’d been perfect. Everything he’d ever wanted in a woman, and they’d gotten engaged a week after that first date. They’d just clicked. She was his sunshine, and he never wanted to let her go.

  She kept her job at the coffee shop, and he still ordered his coffees from her, but now she left lipstick kisses on his napkins as she served him.

  They’d gotten married two weeks after moving in together, at City Hall, a couple of co-workers as witnesses. Her sister was still in New Orleans or whatever shithole she lived in, and her parents couldn’t make the trip because of her dad’s health. Sunny’s parents didn’t much like him for moving in on her so fast, but he figured he had the rest of his life to win them over. He wouldn’t meet them until her funeral.

  Dammit.

  Lying on the couch, he’d tossed his arm over his head to block out everything, but it wasn’t working. The memories were just coming, too fast for him to sort them.

  The kiss had really fucked with him.

  It had been so different from his sunshine, and he’d liked it. That fiery untamedness. That’s what he’d wanted in his life. When he went back to his apartment and saw Sunny, realizing the sister she’d been talking about so much was a twin sister, and he’d just kissed her, he’d actually had the thought that he might be with the wrong twin. He’d had second thoughts about the marriage.

  The bitch had made him have second thoughts about his sunshine. And those second thoughts had lasted longer than just that night. They’d gone on for a while. He’d actually contemplated divorcing Sunny and finding Dusty, letting Sunny live her life with someone else.

  If he had, she would still be alive.

  He fucking hated Dusty.

  All the familiar hatred was back now, something he could deal with. Something he could embrace. Clutch at with wild abandon.

  Hatred would rock him to sleep tonight.

  Still, he lay awake and stared at her ceiling until the sun came up.

  Lilith knocked on the door softly, since they all knew Dusty would still be sleeping.

  He gave his oral report; nothing new had happened. Alberto had not shown up. All was well.

  And Theo had some hunting of his own to do. He’d go home and grab a nap, then hit the streets, since these family guys had wives to get back to before he had his next shift with the she-bitch.

  Dusty woke up to early afternoon sunlight streaming through a crack in her curtains. She yawned and stretched and managed to roll her heavy body out of bed. It was a force of will, but she managed to get herself to the bathroom and some semblance of humanity before going to her kitchen. She was finally remembering people were here with her.

  It was something different, having a woman in her kitchen every morning when she woke up. Lilith was sitting at her kitchen table, a takeout lunch set out in front of her. Today, it looked like a salad from the deli on the corner. They had a maple bacon, apple, and feta salad that was to die for.

  “Good morning,” she croaked out before stumbling over to the coffee pot. “Uneventful, I assume?”

  “Yeah,” Lilith said before stuffing the last bite of her salad in her mouth. “What’s on your plate today?”

  Rubbing her eyes and resenting the hell out of the beautiful woman at her kitchen table, Dusty said, “Well, I have to wake up first, then make a run to the mega store for the bar. I need toilet paper and cleaning shit.” She poured the first cup of humanity. “I have a list somewhere.”

  She remembered her conversation with Theo last night. She’d ask him to let her help finish the trio of demons off.

  In the middle of a heated discussion about why he hated her and what a mind-fuck she was.

  She couldn’t do it. The words had been spoken in a moment of weakness on her part. Sure, she wanted in, but she didn’t think he’d be able to work with someone he couldn’t stand. And it was clear to her now, he couldn’t stand the thought of her, much less the sight of her.

  She reminded him of his true love. Who would want to be around that constantly?

  She chugged her coffee as quickly as she could.

  “I need to get moving.” Not that toilet paper was that important, but she needed to be someplace else. Anyplace. In motion. Thoughtless.

  A quick shower and a change of clothes later, they were in Lilith’s Challenger on their way to the store. They walked up and down aisles, Dusty tossing stuff in the shopping cart. A giant package of TP, bleach, a new toilet brush, some tiny pretzels that Don liked to munch on during the day.

  It was mundane and just what she needed. When they left to go to the bar, Liam was there already, waiting outside for them.

  “Oh, good. I need to talk to you.” Dusty hadn’t been able to get the conversation out of her head, even with thoughts of bleach to water ratios in her head.

  “Okay.” Liam followed them inside, juggling bags alongside the two women.

  “I’m taking off. I’ve got plans.” Lilith dropped her bags on the ground next to the bar and was gone.

  “She’s a woman of few words,” Dusty mused.

  “But a hell of a partner,” Liam replied as he started unbagging her groceries and laying everything out in a row on the bartop.

  “Look, I appreciate all this, but I don’t think I need you guys. I panicked.” She lied. She hadn’t panicked and she did need them, but Dusty couldn’t deal with Theo. She’d imagined something different when she called him. Or she hadn’t imagined anything. Just hoped.

  Liam stood from bending over the bags and crossed his arms over his chest.

  “Look, Viscous has uncovered some stuff that makes me nervous leaving you unprotected.”

  “Like what?” It didn’t really matter; she couldn’t do this anymore. She blindly put away the bleach bottles in the storage closet, next to the industrial rags she ordered.

  “Like they paid off the judge and the prosecutor in the trial.”

  She froze.

  “Or, more precisely, their boss did. And all of them are dead now.”

  No wonder Theo was so efficient that night. It wasn’t his first rodeo.

  Now it was even more important to her that they stop working with her. The more they worked with her, the closer they would get to the truth and Theo getting caught.

  “Shit,” she muttered under her breath.

  “Yeah. Shit.” Liam agreed. “So, we’re not going anywhere. You’re in the middle of something, and I’m not sure what yet. We’re helping you. You don’t have to pay us, so there’s really nothing to
worry about.” He walked over to her and put his hands on her upper arms. It was a brotherly gesture, and she appreciated it.

  But she had to make him understand it was best this way.

  “Theo hates me. I thought we could get over our history, but it’s not working.” She spoke the words with a finality she didn’t feel. “I can’t do it.”

  “Then he’s off the case. I’ll take care of it.” Liam’s mouth was turned down like he’d just sucked on a lemon.

  She thought she might have just gotten Theo fired and the panic at the thought must have shown.

  “This case was a test for him. I wouldn’t fire him for not getting along with one client. It’s just showing me what sort of case I can put him on and what I can’t. I’ll talk to him. Don’t worry. Please.” He squeezed her shoulders, and Dusty felt a measure of relief.

  “Okay.”

  Together, they put away her groceries and she opened the bar, with Liam sitting at the corner with his ginger ale.

  The entire time, Dusty had a funny feeling in her chest like she’d done the wrong thing, but she didn’t know how to undo it. She would seem so flaky if she said, “Never mind,” at this point.

  She hated the thought of not having Theo sleeping on her couch at night—hearing his soft grunts and sighs as he tried to find a comfortable position, the light snores, the simple manliness he brought to her tiny apartment.

  She would miss it.

  Dusty couldn’t do it though, if he hated her. She would have to get over this.

  Mark Daimler was a shameless flirt. Theo was disgusted as he watched the douchebag from the truck in the parking lot. Through the store windows, he could see the asshole reach around and stroke the cashier’s ass, whispering in her ear. In a moment, she would take a break and they’d disappear into the back and get it on, her leaving before him, him coming out later, running a comb through his thinning hair.

  It was a routine that had taken him about a week to catch. Every other day, he picked one of his two women here. The cashier and the sales manager. The sales manager hadn’t been the manager when he’d started fucking her, but then again, the cashier wasn’t his second conquest here. Or even his third.

  Theo had been watching long enough to know that Mark had been fucking his way through the employees at the store for years, and his wife and children had no clue.

  Mark hadn’t been able to get it up under the pressure of his friends, but that hadn’t stopped him from using other implements to rape his wife. For that, he would pay.

  Dearly.

  His phone rang, and when he answered, he heard the street sounds before he heard Holder’s gruff, “What the fuck did you do to her?”

  “What do you mean, what did I do to her?” He was pissed, and he couldn’t tell if it was at Mark Daimler for being himself, or if it was some weird reaction to Holder’s words, insinuating he was a bad guy.

  Wait. He was a bad guy.

  “She wants to fire us. I compromised with taking you off the job.”

  Wait. What?

  “I’m fired?”

  “No, dipshit. But you’re off her case. So my initial question stands. What did you do to her? Did you fuck her?”

  Theo tamped down the sudden image of slick, sweaty bodies tangled in an ancient dance of satisfaction.

  “Absolutely not. I was married to her sister, remember?”

  “Is that what this is about then? She said something about a past you two share. Is it the sister thing?”

  Theo’s jaw clenched and his teeth ground together. “You’re walking a dangerous line here, man. You might want to think about what comes out of your mouth next.”

  The sister thing.

  A deep exhale came through the phone. “Okay, I’m sorry. I get that wasn’t very diplomatic to say. But is it because they’re sisters? Is that the past thing she’s talking about?”

  Theo dropped his head to the steering wheel, exhausted. He was tired of thinking about it, tired of living it. Just tired.

  “I don’t want off the case.” The words were out of his mouth before he had a chance to stop them. He heard them almost as soon as he thought them. He was reacting without thought, and it scared him. He didn’t do that. Theo meticulously thought through every action he took. That was who he was.

  Now, he was different.

  “Well, tough.” Holder’s voice sounded through the line with finality.

  Theo hung up the phone and tossed it in the seat next to him.

  He examined his pounding heart rate, his clammy skin, and his shaky hands.

  He was panicking. Theo didn’t want off the case.

  He thought of Dusty alone in her apartment, going to work without him. Sure, Holder and Lilith were capable protectors, as well as the other guys at the firm he’d met.

  But they weren’t him. They didn’t know what she was up against.

  He wasn’t going to stop this ridiculous thing he’d put into motion. He couldn’t. If she didn’t come with him to do the guys, it wouldn’t be as worth it. And he couldn’t imagine why.

  Things were changing, faster than ever. Those things were his feelings, and he didn’t like it. But his feelings of hatred for Dusty had faded. He wasn’t in love with her by any stretch of the imagination. He loved Sunny, but the fact he had to remind himself of that was a hard-hitting blow to his gut.

  Did he love Sunny? Or did he love her memory?

  He was getting lost. He could feel it. Spinning out of control, like a top wobbling on its last few rotations before stopping.

  Whatever it was, he couldn’t let her kick him off this case.

  Theo was fucked.

  Dusty was waiting to see who would replace Liam when Theo stomped through the doorway of her bar.

  “You.” He pointed at her. “Storeroom. Now.”

  She looked at Sue and Don and shrugged before following Theo on shaky knees.

  As if she didn’t know what this was about. He was pissed at her. Not that it mattered. He hated her anyway. So he was pissed and he hated her. So what?

  Still, she couldn’t feel her toes as she made her feet follow him down the short hallway and into the tiny storeroom.

  In here, she was too close. She could smell him. Could see his pupils. Could hear his ragged breaths.

  Could see the stubble of his unshaven cheek. Could see his pulse pounding in his neck.

  Could smell the aftershave mingled with sweat that teased her with the underlying scent of a purely male essence.

  Jesus Christ.

  “You want me gone?” His words were a low murmur, and she was mesmerized by his lips as they formed them.

  She opened her mouth to answer, but words didn’t come, so she closed it. Instead, she nodded her head.

  “You want to put an end to this?” He almost sounded hurt, and that confused the hell out of her. His feet moved closer to her, and they were chest to chest, touching with each breath they took.

  Too close.

  “What?” she asked, needing to end her confusion. If he meant to the two of them, then that was a no-brainer. There wasn’t a two of them to end. But if he meant the protection detail, then absolutely, yes. She didn’t want to share his space, not if he hated her so much. But if he meant the vengeance? The retribution for Sunny’s death?

  She didn’t know.

  “You want me gone? You want this to stop?” He spoke slowly. “That’s what Liam said. And I want to know why. This was your idea in the first place.”

  “None of this was what I wanted when I called you. I wasn’t expecting an entire team to watch me around the clock. I wasn’t expecting people being right outside my bathroom when I took a shit in the morning. I didn’t call you so I could have a ride everywhere and company on my shopping trips. I didn’t want any of this.” She was gesticulating between the two of them, and in the process, slapping his rock-hard chest with her fingers with each gesture.

  He grabbed her hands, wrapping them in his fists and tugging them behind her.
The move folded her body into his, and she realized she was flush against him, with his hands wrapped around her.

  She couldn’t breathe.

  “Then why did you call me?” He murmured before burying his head in her hair and sniffing it. It was a long and slow, luxuriant sniff, as if he’d wanted to do it for years.

  “Because I want them gone.” She could feel his heartbeat as it thudded erratically against her chest. Her words were breathless. The sounds they made in the tiny storeroom sounded like the whispers of lovers, even though they weren’t. Between the heartbeat thudding against his chest and the feel of his breath still in her hair, she felt a distinct tenderness that scared her coming from Theo.

  He pulled back, and his warmth was gone, but his hands still held hers between them. He squeezed them hard. A piece of her hair was stuck on a piece of his stubble, connecting them in a strange intimacy she didn’t want to lose.

  “I told you I was taking care of that. And you wanted to help me.”

  The wounded sound was back in his voice, and she realized he was making himself vulnerable for her right now. She couldn’t imagine who else might have seen this side of him, but she knew it wasn’t very many people. This was rare.

  She nodded, speechless, stuck in the moment.

  “Then go out there and tell Liam we’re not done.”

  She took a deep breath, and instead of agreeing with him, she started talking.

  “You hate me. You can’t stand to look at me. I can tell every time you look at me, you see her. You remember what I did. And you hate me. I don’t want to keep putting you through that.”