Paul laughed. “Yeah, with some Baileys in it, preferably.”
Jeremy smiled and gave his shoulder a squeeze before letting go. “I think that can be arranged.”
They walked back to the house in companionable silence, left their shovels by the door, and stripped off their snowy shoes, coats, and gloves before padding to the kitchen. There was still coffee in the pot, so Jeremy just dug out the Baileys from the refrigerator and gave them both a generous dose before leading Paul into the living room to relax on the couch. Jeremy decided to light a fire to warm them up. While he cleared out the ashes from the day before and set to work building the new one, Paul groaned and stretched out on the couch. Jeremy could hear Paul’s joints popping from where he was.
“I forgot how much work shoveling snow was. No wonder people die of heart attacks doing it.”
Jeremy chuckled, looked over at the man all stretched out on his couch, and had another one of those pitter-patter moments. Paul was wearing another thick wool sweater in a dark green that complemented his tan skin and dark hair. His slightly grumpy frown and aggrieved tone were actually pretty endearing and kind of sexy. Jeremy knew he had it bad when grumpy became sexy, but he just couldn’t help himself.
When he finished with the fire, he made his way back to the couch, and Paul scooted up to make room for him between his legs. They sipped in silence for a while, both watching the fire and listening to it pop and crackle. At some point Paul started rubbing Jeremy’s arm absently. Jeremy wasn’t even sure Paul knew he was doing it, but Jeremy certainly wasn’t going to call his attention to it. He might stop.
“You know, we don’t really have to shovel your car out today. It’ll still be there tomorrow,” Jeremy mumbled drowsily. The words were out of Jeremy’s mouth before he could rethink them.
Luckily Paul just chuckled and said, “That is true. Is that your way of saying you wouldn’t mind if I stayed the night again?”
“Yup. I believe that’s what I’m implying.” Jeremy kept his tone light and teasing with an effort. Despite all the emotional drama in his life at the moment, he really didn’t want to lose out if Paul was as wonderful as he seemed to be. Jeremy might not be in the best place to start a relationship, but if he waited until he was, it might be too late.
“If you’re going to cook again, then how can I possibly say no?” Paul teased back.
Chapter Six
Paul had no idea what he was doing. He was flirting and cuddling and fooling around with a man he’d known for less than a day, but it just felt so good that he didn’t want to stop. All the reasons he’d already come up with for why he shouldn’t be doing it seemed silly just then. He’d never felt this comfortable with anyone before. It was like they’d known each other forever, but things were still hot and new and exciting at the same time.
Of course, it could just be that they were in a little fantasy bubble that would burst as soon as it hit the real world. That thought started another little niggle of doubt in his head, and a voice that sounded suspiciously like his ex-wife reminded him that he really was terrible at the whole relationship thing. His marriage had failed miserably, and he’d never dated anyone else to get a second opinion.
Maybe he was being selfish, taking advantage of the fact that Jeremy was vulnerable, especially since he had no idea how they were going to manage any kind of relationship even if Jeremy wanted one. Selfish, inattentive, insensitive, emotionally unavailable, and a whole mess of other ins and uns were words that Cecily had thrown at him often enough during their divorce and before it. They’d hit him pretty hard, because he hadn’t thought he was any of those things, but maybe she was right and he was just too clueless to realize it.
Thinking about this kind of thing always made his head hurt. He didn’t know how to be anything but what he was, and Jeremy seemed to like him, at least for now. He’d just have to go with that. Paul told the little voice in his head to be quiet and wrapped an arm around Jeremy’s chest to pull him closer. A warm fire, coffee and Baileys, and a hot guy who was sweet as could be and could cook. Really, what more could a guy ask for? If Jeremy didn’t like anything he was doing or if he needed something more, Paul just had to hope that he would say so and not leave it up to Paul to figure it out.
After a little while, Jeremy turned on the news, and they watched reports of traffic accidents, people trapped in their houses, and cleanup efforts from all over the area while they dozed on the couch. Eventually he must have nodded off, because the fire had burned low when he next opened his eyes. Jeremy was still nestled against him on the couch, but the TV was off and the other man was reading.
Again, it occurred to him how odd it was to be so comfortable with Jeremy, but Paul remembered his mom saying once that when it was right, he’d know it. He’d been all of sixteen at the time, and his mom had been talking about girls, but Paul was pretty sure the sentiment still applied. Of course, at the time and for years after, he’d also thought his mom was full of shit, but now he wasn’t so sure.
Paul must have moved or made some sound that let Jeremy know he was awake, because the other man turned and looked at him over his shoulder. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
“Nice nap?”
Paul smiled a little sheepishly. “Yeah. Guess I was still a little tired. I don’t think I’ve slept this much in months.”
“I’m sure being on the road a lot can wear you out.”
“It does, but you’d think I’d be used to it by now.”
Jeremy just smiled shyly at him for a moment before he said, “Want some lunch?”
They shared tomato soup, cheddar cheese, and crackers before going out to work a little longer on the snow. A second plow came through late in the afternoon, so they were going to have another pile to clean up the next day, but Paul was too tired to worry about it anymore that night. His arms, shoulders, and back ached from lifting the heavy wet snow, but when Jeremy suggested another shower and a little roll in the hay to get them both warmed up again, Paul sure as hell wasn’t going to say no.
The shower involved a great deal more groping than actual washing, and by the time they were stepping out of it, both of them were so worked up that they practically ran for Jeremy’s bed. Paul tackled Jeremy onto the mattress amidst a great deal of laughing and wrestling.
When Paul was settled between Jeremy’s thighs, Jeremy’s face sobered for a moment. He held Paul’s gaze with an intensity that sent a pulse of heat through Paul’s entire body as he pulled Jeremy close for a deep and thorough kiss. They kissed like that for several long minutes, each cupping the other’s face in his palms. The moment felt more intimate than anything else they had done so far. It changed the mood from playfully frantic to deep and emotionally charged in the space of a few moments.
This time Jeremy let Paul take things at his own pace. Paul used his mouth and his fingers to coax the most wonderful sounds out of Jeremy before he couldn’t wait any longer and he gloved up and entered the other man. They made love on their sides, with Paul pressed close against Jeremy’s back and Jeremy’s leg draped over his arm and hip. They exchanged wet, hot kisses while he thrust slowly into Jeremy, speeding up as need and pleasure built between them. Paul held back until Jeremy stroked himself to climax, but only just barely. After the spots cleared from his vision, Paul pulled Jeremy into a tight embrace and buried his face against the other man’s neck, just breathing him in while his heartbeat slowed back to normal. He had the craziest notion that he could spend forever just like that.
They napped for a little while again before Jeremy got up to go make dinner. Paul kept him company, helping when he was allowed to, while Jeremy whipped up a chicken and pasta dish that Paul ate so much of he thought he might burst if he took one more mouthful. It was a good thing they were getting plenty of exercise, or he’d have to spend a lot of extra time in the gym after the weekend.
That night over dinner, they talked, but not about anything too intense or emotionally touchy. They did what peopl
e usually did on a first date: they talked about music and movies and work. When Paul started talking about his job, he realized he hadn’t thought about work most of the entire time he’d been there. Which was almost unheard of for him, since work was pretty much his entire life at that point.
Jeremy must have noticed the odd look on his face, because he asked, “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, really. I just realized I hadn’t thought about work since yesterday.” He smiled and winked at Jeremy. “Must be the company.”
Jeremy blushed and grinned back at him. “I suppose I should continue to try to distract you, then?”
“I’m not complaining,” he replied, and he wasn’t, not at all.
Chapter Seven
Jeremy couldn’t believe how well things were going. He’d already decided to just sit back and see what happened between them, but that didn’t stop him from hoping Paul might say something to let him know that he was feeling the same way. He didn’t want to be the one to bring it up, though, particularly since he was so needy.
After dinner they cleared the table and Jeremy helped Paul clean up, just as they had the night before. Jeremy found himself thinking he could really get used to this, given half a chance. He didn’t know how washing dishes could be sexy, but somehow Paul made it that way without even trying. Maybe it just reminded him of the two showers they’d had together—something he’d also gladly get used to if he were allowed.
When everything was cleaned up and packed away, they went back to the living room to cuddle on the couch. Paul built another fire while Jeremy pulled out a movie. He skipped over the row of Christmas DVDs, feeling a pang of sadness as he skimmed the titles, but he refused to dwell on it while Paul was there. There’d be plenty of time to cry in his Cheerios after Paul left to go home. Jeremy grabbed Casino Royale, the new hot version, and popped it in the player, figuring that Paul would prefer that over some of his chick flicks and classics.
They curled up on the couch like they had earlier and watched the movie, sipping wine and petting each other lazily. Sometime during the movie the petting got a little heavier, and Jeremy didn’t even remember noticing when the credits rolled. They were too busy making out. They shut off the TV and made their way to bed as soon as they realized the movie was over, shedding clothes as they went. They were both hard and dripping from their extended make-out session, so it didn’t take long for both of them to climax. Paul fucked him again, and Jeremy knew that he’d really like to get used to that. He hadn’t gotten laid this much in over a year, maybe two.
Byron had dumped him in February, but their relationship hadn’t been hot and heavy in… well, actually, it had never really been hot and heavy, not like it was with Paul. Byron had at least had the decency to wait until after the holidays to break up with him, but things had been pretty lackluster between them for a long time before that. If Jeremy had known what it was like to be with someone who made him this hot and horny, he never would have stayed with Byron as long as he had.
They slept curled up together as they had the night before, only Jeremy was the first out of bed this time. He wanted to make breakfast for Paul, but more importantly, the fact that it was Christmas Eve morning had smacked him in the face as soon as he’d woken up, almost bringing tears to his eyes, and he didn’t want Paul to see it. Jeremy had thought he’d been doing pretty well up until that point, but apparently not. Lying in bed, listening to Paul snore softly, Jeremy had desperately wanted to turn over, burrow his face into Paul’s chest, and cry his eyes out, but Paul didn’t deserve that, and it wouldn’t have done any good, anyway. For a week after his mother had died, Jeremy had cried at least once a day, sometimes for hours, and it hadn’t made him feel any better. He wasn’t really a crier, but he’d always heard people say that they felt better after a good cry, so he’d decided to give it a try. It hadn’t worked.
When someone who’d played a major part in his life for the entirety of his life had just evaporated into thin air, Jeremy guessed a few tears just weren’t going to cut it, and as hard as it was for him to grasp the reality of her being gone, it was even harder to live it. Jeremy knew there were people who just didn’t understand how much her passing had hurt him. Byron certainly hadn’t. But she was the only parent he had. His dad had disappeared when he was a kid, skipping out on the child support after the divorce. Aunt Kathy lived in Colorado and was too far away for any real closeness, and his grandparents had passed a long time ago, so it had been just the two of them for as long as Jeremy could remember. She’d been his friend as well as his mom, and part of him still couldn’t believe she was gone.
To keep from dwelling on it, Jeremy went downstairs and busied himself in the kitchen. He didn’t want to be a basket case when Paul woke up, so he just had to try not to think about what should have been happening in that house on Christmas Eve. The snow and slush outside would have refrozen overnight, so he and Paul would probably have to wait a few hours before they could finish digging his car out. That gave him a few more hours to enjoy Paul’s company, and he wasn’t going to spoil it.
Jeremy had just set the coffee pot to brewing when he heard a strange ringtone coming from the living room. When he went to investigate, he discovered the sound was coming from Paul’s briefcase, which had been left, forgotten, against the wall. Jeremy didn’t open it. He just made a mental note to let Paul know when he woke up, and went back to the kitchen to wait for the coffee.
Paul shuffled in just as the pot finished brewing. He had that sexy sleep-rumpled look again, and Jeremy couldn’t resist pulling the man in for a kiss. He stopped the kiss a little abruptly when he started getting a little choked up, but luckily Paul was too groggy to notice. He just gave Jeremy a sleepy smile and accepted the mug he was offered before plopping down in one of the kitchen chairs, while Jeremy started breakfast for the both of them.
“Your cell was ringing earlier,” Jeremy said as he cracked eggs into a pan.
“Oh? Okay, thanks.” Paul got up and left, returning a moment later with his cell pressed to his ear. Jeremy could just make out the tinny electronic voicemail message before an unpleasant screeching started blasting out of the phone. Jeremy could almost understand the words even from all the way across the kitchen, and he saw Paul flinch and cringe as whoever left the message continued without a pause for breath. The sound cut out, and then the tinny voice came back twice more, followed by more screeching. Jeremy made himself busy plating their breakfast and making a big show of tidying up so Paul wouldn’t think he was being nosy, and after only a few minutes more, Paul sighed and hung up the phone.
“Everything all right?” Jeremy asked.
Paul grimaced and rubbed his temple. “My ex-wife. She’s a little pissed because I haven’t checked in. She’s watching Boomer, my cat, and she was expecting me on Friday. I kind of forgot to call her, and she apparently tried to call me Friday and yesterday, but I guess I never heard the phone ring. We were probably outside or upstairs or something.” Paul shrugged and gave him a pained look. “I should have called her. I don’t know if she’s more pissed because I didn’t remember to call her or because she was worried about me, but if I had to guess, I’d say the former. She’s just using the latter to make me feel guilty.”
Jeremy put their plates on the table and sat down. He wasn’t sure what to say, so he just gave Paul a sympathetic smile and squeezed his hand before starting to eat.
Paul gave him a sad smile in return and said, “Anyway, she’s demanding that I come and pick up the cat today, so I guess I can’t procrastinate any more on digging my car out. I don’t know why it’s so damned important. Boomer was her cat too, but….” Paul shrugged and shook his head.
Jeremy tried very hard to hide his disappointment. It wasn’t as if he didn’t know that Paul would have to leave sometime. Jeremy wasn’t going to be fit company for the next couple of days anyway, so it was probably better for Paul to go home than to have that inflicted on him. It still didn’t make him feel any b
etter about it, though.
Jeremy took a deep breath and forced himself to smile. “No problem. As soon as the temperature comes up a little and the sun gets high enough to hit the snow, we should be able to get your car free.”
“Thanks.” Paul paused and looked for a moment like he wanted to say something more, but he just cleared his throat and started eating his breakfast without another word.
The rest of breakfast was quiet. Jeremy was afraid to say anything, and Paul didn’t seem to feel like talking, either. Jeremy wasn’t going to push. He’d convinced Paul to stay there two nights in a row when he knew the man hadn’t been home in weeks. They’d had a phenomenal couple of days, but reality couldn’t be avoided forever. The man had an entire life of his own in another town. Jeremy couldn’t expect him to just drop everything for some guy he’d just met… at least not right away, anyway.
Besides, Indiana township wasn’t that far away. An hour’s drive wasn’t terrible, and Jeremy would be more than willing to do it every chance he got if it meant he could keep seeing Paul. He’d already been expecting to spend Christmas alone, so nothing had really changed. Yep, that’s right, absolutely nothing… unless you counted the fact that Jeremy had kind of fallen head over heels for the man in the space of two days.
God, he was such a sap.
Chapter Eight
The phone call from his ex had upset Paul more than he really wanted to admit. Cecily had thrown the same old words at him again: selfish, insensitive etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. And she was right. He should have called, but it had just sort of slipped his mind. Now he was starting to wonder again if he’d been insensitive with Jeremy as well. The other man was acting a little strangely that morning, and Paul had no idea why. Had he overstayed his welcome? Had he missed something, or should he have done something more than he had? Or did it even have anything to do with him?
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