by S. E. Lund
I held onto Kate firmly, closed my eyes, and said a silent prayer for Ethan, who had been my second father even before I married his daughter. I felt a weight of sadness in my gut over the situation. Nothing could comfort someone who was possibly losing their father. Nothing.
I knew that only too well when my own father died. No matter how distant we had been at times over politics and how I felt he could never show or tell me how much he cared for me, I knew from Ethan that he did very much. He never had a father and didn’t know how to be one. I hoped to escape that fate.
No, that was wrong. I would escape that fate. I’d be the father to Sophie – and Liam, if I had the chance – that my father had never been to me. I’d give them more than financial security, which my own father seemed to think was all he needed to provide. I’d be their rock the way Ethan was for Kate and Heath. I’d be there, strong, sure, for their entire lives, if I had my way. And I intended to have my way.
“I’ll wait until I can see Ethan in the ICU and then I’ll run by the apartment and give Sophie a bottle,” I said and kissed Kate’s cheek. Her eyes were red, her nose a bit swollen. She forced a smile I knew she didn’t feel and then glanced away quickly, as if she’d start to weep again if we looked at each other too deeply.
I led Kate back to the small seating area we had claimed in the patient waiting room and once we were back over at our little alcove, we sat for a moment, while Elaine collected her things. It was time to move to the ICU waiting room instead.
For the next half hour, I kept a vigil with Kate and Elaine in the ICU waiting room, stopping every few moments to ask the nurses when we could see Ethan.
“He’ll be up in a few minutes,” the nurse said to me with a sympathetic smile. “They wanted to make sure he was stable before they brought him here. He should arrive soon, but we can’t predict. Every patient is unique.”
“Is there a problem? Dr. Franks said surgery went well.”
She checked her screen and called over to the surgical suite where Ethan had been. She spoke in a quiet voice and nodded, listening to the other person on the line.
“Thank you.” Then she turned to me. “They had some problems with his blood pressure and had to treat him in the OR suite. He should be up as soon as his vitals stabilize.”
“Thank you,” I said and sighed, running my hand through my hair. “Please let us know if anything happens.”
“We will, Dr. Morgan.”
I went back to where Elaine and Kate sat, their eyes blank. “He should be here as soon as everything’s stable. Sometimes, patients stay in recovery for as long as their surgery took to finish.”
“There’s something wrong,” Kate said, her face pale. “Dr. Franks said he’d be up soon.”
I shrugged, trying hard not to impart any of the anxiety I felt about Ethan. “Sometimes it takes longer,” I said. “They were making sure his vitals are all stable before they transport him. He’s in post-surgical recovery. Once everything is good, they’ll move him here.”
She nodded, but I could see the doubt in her eyes. “Maybe you could go and see Sophie now,” she said. “While we wait for daddy to come here.”
I nodded. “You don’t want me to stay with you until he does?”
She shook her head. “No," she said. “I don’t want Sophie to be away from either of us too long. She doesn’t know Karen. She might be upset.”
“I’ll go,” I said and stroked Kate’s cheek, wishing I could allay her fears – about Ethan and about Sophie – but I knew I couldn’t. I hoped that she and Elaine would take comfort in each other’s company for the next hour while I was away checking on Sophie.
“You could call Karen and ask her how Sophie's doing,” I said, preferring to stay and be with Kate in case something happened to Ethan in the next hour. “I could stay with you.”
Kate was adamant. “No, please,” she said. “Go and make sure Sophie is okay. I can barely stand to be away from her this long. Come right back after she’s fed and happy.”
I stood and bent down to kiss Elaine on the cheek. “You okay?” I asked, searching her face. “You two will be all right while I’m gone?”
“Go,” she said and pasted on a smile for me. “Take care of Sophie for us. We’ll be fine.” She reached over and took Kate’s hand and squeezed.
Then I bent down and kissed Kate on the cheek, which was still damp from her tears.
I turned to go, wishing I could stay, afraid that by the time I got back, Ethan could be gone.
On my way home, I got a call from Mark Dupuis, the Deputy Chair of the Board of Directors for the corporation.
“Hey, Mark,” I said, frowning, wondering what he’d be calling about. “What can I do for you?”
I heard him take in a breath, like he was preparing himself for a difficult conversation. “Drake, I hate to do this to you, and I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but can you come down and meet with the Board? They’ve called an emergency meeting to discuss the, well, shall we say, negative publicity around the corporation.”
“What?” I said and frowned, checking my watch for the time. “What negative publicity?” Then of course, I remembered. “No, forget that. I know what negative publicity.” I sighed heavily and tried to figure out the proper response. “Look, normally, I’d be right there to meet with them, talk about strategy, but I have an emergency on my hands right now. I have to go to my place and feed my daughter— “
“This is a bit more important than that, Drake. I hate to say it, but this is pretty serious.”
“No, I mean, my father-in-law is in New York Presbyterian. He’s had a stroke and came out of the OR. He’s not doing well and now is not a good time for me to be coming down for a session with the Board. Please ask them to reschedule.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Mark said quickly. “I understand. I’m sure the Board will understand but I’m also sure they want to ask you to resign from the board completely and let them manage things while this court case is ongoing.”
“For Christ’s sake,” I said and pulled over, unable to concentrate. When I was stopped completely, I closed my eyes. “All right,” I said. “You can tell them I’ll withdraw for a year. Tell them to appoint whomever they decided as acting Chairman. I want to be kept up to date with any decisions they make, but I understand the necessity of this.”
“Thanks, Drake. I regret having to do this, but I think it’s for the best. We’ve had people calling from the papers asking about your role in the corporation and we’ve had to continually reply with ‘no comment’.”
“Tell the Board that I respect their need to appoint someone temporarily to take my place.”
“I will, and Drake? I hope everything works out for you. For your dad and for the case.”
“Me, too,” I said and ended the call. Then, I wondered what he meant by the case. Did he think I was maybe guilty? For a moment, anger filled me that Lisa would do this to me.
I did nothing to her. I never led her on or made any promises. She had to have lost touch with reality. That was the only explanation for her behavior.
Why?
Did she imagine that by ruining my life and reputation that hers would be better? That she’d get off lighter when it came to sentencing? Thing is, if she insisted that I was involved and if they believed her, it would be harder on her than if she pled not-guilty by reason of insanity. Sure, she’d go to some psych hospital – maybe for years – but at least she’d get off lighter than if she was found guilty of attempted murder and conspiracy to commit murder, and spend decades in jail, or whatever the penalty ended up being.
Then, my cell rang again. It was Lara.
“Now what?” I said, my bad mood getting the better of me with my one best female friend, aside from Kate.
“You haven’t read the Herald?”
“No,” I said, angry. I finally reached the front of the apartment building, where a spot miraculously appeared as if the parking gods were feeling bad for me and opened a spot f
or me. “I’ve been at the hospital. Ethan had another stroke. He just got out of surgery and I’m going home to feed Sophia because Kate doesn’t want to leave the hospital.”
“Oh, Drake,” she said, her voice full of sympathy. “I’m so sorry… and I hate to be the bearer of bad news…”
“You’re the second person who’s said that to me today. What nastiness did the venerable reporters at The Herald have to say about me? Let me guess – Doctor Dom Does Dirty Deeds…”
“No, more like Spanking Surgeon and Submissive Sweetheart,” she said sardonically. “There’s a photo of you with Lisa at a dungeon party. Or at least, it looks like you. You always wore a white shirt and black leather pants, as well as a black mask. Your shirt is open to display a nice six-pack and she’s bending over in front of you.”
“Oh, God,” I said and rubbed my eyes. “We’re not actually having sex, are we?”
“No, you’re fully dressed, but she’s bending over, and you have your hands on her hips.”
“I remember that there were a few photos being taken. Derek liked to have a record of all the men she was partnered with. He’d use them later when he punished her.”
“Yeah, I remember. Well, looks like Lisa turned some photos over to the press. The Herald, that venerable institution, decided to publish one."
“No wonder the Board at the corporation wanted to kick me off.”
I heard her sigh on the other end of the line. “Oh, crap, Drake. That’s too bad.”
“Tell me about it. So, I’m off the Foundation and Corporation boards, I’m on a leave of absence from my Fellowship program and I’m on a leave from NYP. My father-in-law is in danger of dying and my wife has a touch of postpartum depression. What else can fuck up in my life?”
“I'm glad you and Kate finally talked about her depression.
I frowned. “Yes,” I said. “I could tell that she’s under stress, tired and finding it hard but I didn’t recognize it as depression until you said something.”
“Did she tell you she cries all the time and is afraid that Sophie will stop breathing?”
“No, she won’t talk about it,” I said and frowned, adrenaline flowing through me that I had misjudged Kate’s mental health so much. “I knew she was tired and she does cry easily, but that’s to be expected after major trauma like she had.”
“Well, she needs help,” Lara said. “She needs medication or some counseling to deal with everything.”
I sighed heavily and sat there with my eyes closed for a moment. “Thanks for calling. I’ll make sure she gets help. We have a nanny-slash-housekeeper coming in several days a week now to help. Maybe that will do. I hope…” I said and realized that if Ethan died, it would be another blow to an already delicate Kate.
“I hope that Ethan survives,” Lara said softly, as if she had read my mind.
“Exactly. If he dies, and there’s a fifty-fifty chance that he will based on his stats, I don’t know what Kate will do.”
“She’s on the edge, Drake. Watch out for her.”
“I will,” I said and took in a deep breath. “I gotta go. I have to feed Sophie and get back to the hospital.”
“Okay,” she said, her voice soft. “You go and look after that beautiful baby of yours. I’ll keep track of the media and let you know if anything needs attention or a response. I can be your spokesperson, if you want. Give anyone my number and I’ll take care of things for you.”
“Thanks,” I said, feeling so tired at that moment that I felt like I could collapse in bed and sleep for hours. “I will.”
I ended the call, turned off the car, and went upstairs to the apartment.
Karen was walking around with Sophie on her shoulder, moving between the stove where dinner was cooking and the counter where Sophie’s bottle of breastmilk was warming in a container of hot water.
“Drake,” she said with a smile. “How is everything? How is Justice McDermott?”
“He’s still alive,” I said and threw my coat and scarf on the back of the sofa. I went to her and took Sophie from her arms. I kissed Sophie’s cool plump cheek and smiled at her. In return, she gave me a huge smile. I glanced over at Karen. “He’s very sick.”
She made a face. “What are his chances?”
“Fifty-fifty,” I said and removed the bottle from the warm water, testing it on my wrist to see how warm it was. It was perfect so I went to the living room and sat on the sofa. I lowered Sophie into my arms and held the bottle for her. She took the nipple hungrily and sucked away, her little hand reaching up to touch the bottle. I thought that she would usually be touching Kate’s breast, and felt bad that she was being bottle fed instead of being with her mother, but I was glad to be able to feed her.
“You received a few calls that went to your answering machine,” Karen said, her voice soft. “I couldn’t help but overhear them. Detective McDonald called as did a woman called Lara. And a Mr. Dupuis from the Board.”
I nodded and met her gaze. “You know about the court case.”
“Hard not to, since it’s all over the papers,” she said and wiped the counter.
“It’s not true,” I said and watched Sophia drink her milk. “She’s out of touch with reality.”
“I know,” she said and came to stand beside the sofa, watching me feed Sophie. “Dave told me as much. Said this woman was probably suffering from erotomania.”
“Something like that,” I said, not wanting to talk about Lisa. “We had a brief relationship in a previous life. She imagined the rest.”
“She sounds crazy,” Karen said. “Delusional. Maybe bi-polar and having a manic phase, concocting fantasies about things. I’ve seen it before, sadly.”
I nodded and pulled the bottle out of Sophie’s mouth so I could burp her. I put her onto my shoulder and she did not like it one bit, arching her back and screaming at the top of her lungs. I caught Karen’s eye and we both smiled.
“She loves her bottle,” she said. “You’re lucky you can go from breast to bottle like that with no nipple confusion. I didn’t have that kind of luck, and my daughter stopped nursing completely.”
Just then, Sophie let out a good solid burp and so I laid her back down again and popped the bottle back into her eager mouth. She sucked away happily once more, the redness to her face fading, her eyes heavy. She’d sleep soon.
Karen went back to the stove and continued to stir the very delicious smelling dish she was cooking. My stomach rumbled but I wanted to get back to Kate as soon as I could.
When Sophie was finished with her bottle, she gave a little squeak when the bottle came out of her mouth but I managed to slip her pacifier back into her mouth and she closed her eyes and sucked away happily. I stood and walked around with her on my shoulder, knowing that she’d soon fall asleep.
At that moment, I felt so happy, with my beautiful baby in my arms. If only Ethan was well and Kate wasn’t so exhausted with new motherhood, and if only Lisa was in jail and the court case over, and if only the publicity surrounding the case was gone, I might consider myself the luckiest man in the world.
I was a lucky man, but there was going to be a lot of hell to get through in the next few hours, days and weeks.
I had to be strong for Kate.
Chapter 10 : Kate
The hour that Drake was away was hell.
Elaine and I sat in the waiting room, hoping to hear word that my father was on his way to ICU, but there was still no word of his transfer. I was beginning to panic even more than I had been. While Drake had said that sometimes, surgical patients have to wait in post-surgical recovery for as long as they were in surgery, most of the time they came out as soon as their vitals stabilized.
By my count, my father had already been in recovery for as long as he had been in surgery.
I went to the nursing station. “Is there any news?”
The young nurse with dark hair and a kind face gave me a sad smile. “I’m sorry Mrs. Morgan, but he’s still up there. We have his
ICU room ready, but he still needs more time. I promise as soon as I get any word, I’ll let you know right away.”
I nodded. “Thank you, and I’m sorry to keep bothering you.”
“Don’t mention it,” she said and smiled.
I turned back to the waiting room just as Drake walked down the hall from the elevators.
He came right over to me and kissed me. “Is he here yet?”
I shook my head. “No, and there’s no news.”
Drake removed his coat and scarf, kissed Elaine on the cheek and then gave me a hug. “Sophie had a bottle and went down without any fuss,” he said, then pulled back. “Let me go and check on things.”
He left, taking the hallway to the surgical suites so he could check on my father.
“Thank God Drake’s here,” Elaine said, her voice soft.
“Yes,” I said and sat beside her, taking her hand and squeezing. “Thank God.”
We sat and waited, watching the small screen in the waiting room, which was set to a local news channel. The volume was turned down and so we watched the news feed along the bottom.
It was then I saw the headline.
Local doctor caught in murder plot mystery
“Oh, my God,” I said and watched in horror as an image of Drake appeared on the television screen.
“What?” Elaine asked. I pointed wordlessly at the television. Elaine watched as well, and I saw her face fall when she read the headline. “Oh, God, those bastards.”
The photo had been taken of him leaving the hospital, and he looked devastatingly handsome in his white lab coat and scrubs, his dark hair a little long. It was taken earlier in the year, since Drake hadn’t been working or doing his class since the accident.
We couldn’t hear what the reporter was saying but there was a new photo of Lisa, taken from court where she appeared to be charged and her bail set. She looked disheveled in her prison orange, her face ashen. Then, a photo of me, taken when I had been with Kurt outside the Doctors Without Borders event so long ago.