Starving For Vengeance

by Debra Kayn

  Plastering her against the wall, he kissed her. If she wanted to see what being with him was like, he'd give it to her. He opened her mouth, and plunged his tongue inside. His lips tingled from the roughness. He kept taking and taking, and the more he took, the more he wanted, until realization hit that he had his fingers tangled in her semi-wet hair and held her against the wall.

  Her tongue dueled with his. Her fingernails dug into his arms. She pressed herself against him, hooking her leg behind his calf and not letting him go. Everything he gave her, she took. He broke away from the kiss, lightheaded and out of breath. His body ached and his thoughts came to him faster than he could process.

  He laid his forehead against hers, realizing he fucked up. Again.

  She wanted to prove a point, and she'd won. His chest ached. There was something going on between them and against his better judgment, he only wanted what she was offering him.

  Shari's nose bumped his, and she hesitantly rubbed against him, giving back what he'd given her. Her soft breath tickled his whiskered jaw. Her lips skimmed his face. Her nose, continued to glide against his, nuzzling him. The silent communication was so stupid and adorable, he laughed painfully.

  "I don't know what to do with you," he said.

  She held his face, pulling him away so she could look at him. "Is it so hard to figure out?"

  "Yeah," he said. "I want you."

  "Then have me." She kissed him softly. "Better yet, let me have you until my uncle comes back. No promises, no screwed up ideas, no ties. Let me be with you, because I want you too."

  "You'll get hurt," he said.

  "I probably will, but I'll take that chance."

  "You'll hurt me." He closed his eyes and damned himself to hell. "It hurts already with all your sweetness, doll."

  "But it won't hurt as bad if you can share it with me. You and me, we'd always have this time together. No one can take that away from us, except you. Please don't do that to us." She ran her thumb over his bottom lip. "For once, let yourself enjoy what makes you happy. I don't know what you've been through, but you need to put yourself first before life passes you by, Lee."

  He blinked hard. She had him hoping, and he hadn't opened himself up since he was little. Abandoned by his mom, almost losing Taylor, and the insecurities that came with the constant threat of Los Li ripping everything he loved away from him, he couldn't afford to let himself hope.

  But that's what he was doing, and Shari made it impossible not to believe a month or two would be better than nothing.

  "You're in my bed tonight after you dance," he said.

  "Okay." She nodded.

  "Don't even think about keeping Sawyer company."

  She kissed him lightly. "He's my friend, but I won't go to his room."

  "What's going on isn't anyone else's business." He held her face. "You need to be careful, and keep living club life the way you always do, doll. Don't risk your safety for me."

  She nodded. "It'll be good between us. I promise."

  "Right." He wasn't at all comfortable with the decision. "I need to get to the warehouse, and you need to eat."

  She walked down the hall, keeping up with his longer strides. He glanced over at her. She wore a stupid ass grin that he returned. She was whacked out of her mind if she believed she'd won. Nobody was going to win. In the end, they'd both lose.

  Yet, she was also happy, and he'd given her that smile by trying. He held her hand tighter. Maybe the pain that'd come afterward was worth a little happiness now.

  Loud voices followed by glass breaking interrupted Lee's epiphany.

  "What was that?" Shari asked.

  Lee put his hand on her stomach and stepped in front of her, taking the stairs first. "Stay behind me."

  In the main room of the club, every Bantorus member and all of the Silver Girls clustered in front of the door. Lee walked forward, keeping Shari behind him.

  "What the hell's going on?" he asked Germ.

  The big guy shook his head. "Something about a chick driving up here as if she owned the place and then Kurt tackled Ink. Everything went a little crazy after that and Cutter broke a bottle over Ink's head to calm him down. Prez has Ink outside now, talking to him."

  "Where's Risa?" Lee wanted to make sure his sister in law was safe.

  Germ hitched his thumb behind him. "Kitchen. After she got a look outside, she said she'd clean up the dishes from breakfast. Remmy told us all to stay inside and give Kurt privacy, so I put Big Dawg out in the hallway to watch Risa."

  Shari squeezed Lee's arm. "I'll go check on Risa."

  "Go right there, and stay until I know more." He watched Shari hurry toward the back. If Risa was content in the kitchen and giving Kurt space, it meant the woman outside wasn't a threat to her marriage or the club.

  Remmy pushed through the crowd, spotted Lee, and motioned him to the side of the room. Lee followed him over, knowing his VP had his brother's back.

  "What's up?" Lee asked.

  Remmy turned away from the others. "Lilly's here."

  "Just Lilly?"

  "Yep," Remmy bit off, checking himself. "Without any escorts."

  Lee ground his teeth together. "I'll call Rain."

  "Already done. He said Lilly surprised them last week by finishing college a semester early and wanted to take the next couple of months to lay low before she looked for a full time job. He thought she was talking about hanging around Pitnam and working for Tori, but this morning, right before I called, he found her room empty and a message on his phone from Lilly. He was getting ready to call us when I called him," Remmy said.

  "So, she drove through the night without any escorts or letting the club know she was headed this way?" Lee rubbed his forehead. "Somebody needs to beat her ass, since she has Rain wrapped around her pinky. She knows better than to leave without telling someone first."

  "I think that's why Kurt's out there now. Seems Ink thought it was his job to give the president's daughter the spanking she deserves," Remmy said.

  Lee shook his head. "Are you saying—?"

  "Yep." Remmy leaned back against the wall. "Lilly's had a crush on Ink since she discovered leather boots. Now she's all grown up, and Ink's noticed."

  "Jesus," Lee mumbled. "Until Rain straightens his daughter out, someone needs to be on her twenty-four/seven."

  "Already done. As soon as Kurt comes in, I'll set Crain and Muff up to watch over her." Remmy motioned for Natalie.

  "Good. Let me know if you need anything from me. I'm heading out to the warehouse and packaging up the next load of guns," Lee said. "Tell the rest of those assholes to get back to work and let Kurt handle Ink and Lilly."

  He walked away and went in search of Shari. He found her in the kitchen, talking to Risa, her hands flying in all directions as she shared about her excitement over tonight's opening at Silver Girls. He leaned against the doorway, reluctant to interrupt.

  He'd put fear in her eyes last night telling her about Tango and he'd made everything better, even giving her hope. This morning, he'd hurt her again, and he made it better by inviting her back into his bed tonight. Now she was happy, and he wanted her to stay that way.

  He stepped back and walked down the hall to the back door. All he could do was get through one day at a time until Tango called him away.

  Chapter Fifteen

  Ten minutes after the Sterling Building opened the doors, the main floor filled to capacity and Sheriff Colby called the fire department to stand on the sidewalk and keep the number of customers under code. Shari hugged Jojo. The contagious excitement in the room after Jojo's dance signaled the start of Shari's routine, and then the promise of high tips for all the Silver Girls for their work tonight.

  "Good luck." Jojo kissed her cheek.

  Shari raised her brows and smiled. "Let's go rock the miners and give them a bigger high than blasting silver out of the mountains."

  She strolled out into the room, paying attention to every man who stepped back to let her thr
ough the crowd. In the back, with the lights aimed to the ceiling, she stepped between the two poles—which she'd decided to skip tonight. Her routine was more personal and something the miner's used to eat up.

  Under the thrill and seduction, she had a bigger goal in mind. Lee was watching her, and she wanted to dance for him.

  She looked below the dim lights at the men crowding the room, and raised her gaze to the darkened shadows standing in the back where she knew Lee and the Bantorus members stood on guard. Lee had brought his Harley to town, while she and the girls took two trucks, and then left her alone to run the show. She was grateful for the space to do her job, but now she wanted to see him.

  He'd never seen her dance before in a professional capacity and with him in the audience, nerves and adrenaline left her jumpy, though she refused to let it show. Men gave up their hard-earned money to watch her, and she'd make sure they went home satisfied.

  The music—So Hott by Kid Rock— started and she inhaled deeply, swinging into her routine. Her chin went down and her hair covered her face. She'd picked this song specifically for Lee. After the intense time they spent working things out between them, he needed fun. He needed to see her crazy. He needed to lighten up and enjoy tonight.

  She danced to show him what he could count on after the show, when they were alone.

  Her heels came off first with practiced ease and she stopped beside Keith, a miner, and gyrated near his leg. When his hands came out, she glided back, shaking her finger. There was no touching allowed.

  The men whooped at her teasing. She laughed, letting her hair fall down her back, without missing a move.

  The music got the crowd going, and she moved back into position and raised her hands, swaying her hips. Teek Lowry moved forward, matching her hip to hip and swaying. She blew him a kiss and moved on to the next miner who was brave enough to get up in front of his friends and move with her.

  Garren, a shy twenty-something year old, smiled, his foot tapping to the music. She leaned forward, unclipped the top of her sequined top, and tossed it over Garren's head to Carrie who stood in position to assist her. Caught up in the mood, she turned and gave them all what they wanted.

  Up, down.

  Left, right.

  Her breasts, glittered with lotion and a long tassel hanging from each nipple, swayed. She caught her lip between her teeth, and fought the urge to cover herself. After all the shows and all the men in Federal who had seen her throughout the last several years, she still hadn't lost her inhibitions, but she'd become good at hiding them.

  It was only boobs. Everyone had them.

  The music reached a peak. She weaved her way over to Sawyer, grabbed his hand, and held it up above her head. She used him for stability and shook her ass, covered in a thin G-string.

  Everyone knew she belonged to Bantorus, and they could touch her. It'd taken her awhile to understand what being a bitch meant, and she was proud of the support she received.

  The vibrations of boots stomping in the room came up through the soles of her bare feet. She danced her way down the line of Bantorus men, paused when Risa stood in front of her. She turned around, and wiggled her backside for Risa. The men went crazy, until Kurt lifted her off her feet and passed her down the line with a grin and a shake of his head. She shrugged, laughing, not missing a move.

  She ended up in front of Lee.

  His penetrating gaze locked onto her eyes. A solemn expression lined his face and he refused to move. Behind the indifference, his arousal was apparent. The tick in his jaw. The flare of his nostrils. The unblinking stare.

  She planted her hands on his chest and rubbed against him, afraid she was pushing her luck. Going by his quiet mood prior to coming to town, she suspected he was holding out on her and had something to say.

  She leaned in, and spoke over the music, "I'm almost done, Lee."

  His hand landed on her hip, his fingers bit into her flesh, and still she moved. The men were watching her ass, but she only had eyes for the biker in front of her.

  She wanted to go back to the club, back to Lee's room, back to the tiny bed with barely enough room for both of them.

  Slowly, she wound down with the music and pulled away, slipping through the crowd where Alana waited with a silk robe. She slid her arms inside, and gathered the edges of the material in front of her.

  "Girl, the miner's ate that up, watching you get off on the nomad...but do not mess around with him," Alana said. "You didn't see his eyes while you were dancing in the front. He looked like he was going to kill everyone that even looked at you."

  She nodded, because she'd seen the hardness in Lee's eyes. "It's okay. Go get the others. It's time to do individual dances. Make sure you go to the high payers first."

  Alana rubbed her arm. "Got it, boss."

  Shari hurried to the other side of the room, and stepped into the office. She found her bag, and pulled out her next outfit. Shimmying out of her thong, she then dropped the robe and picked up her spangled halter when the door came open.

  "Everyone's supposed to be dancing. You'll have to hurry," she said, turning around.

  Instead of one of the girls she'd expected, Lee shut the door and stalked toward her. She let her arm drop to her side. Her dance hadn't put him in a good mood.

  He pressed her up against the desk and kissed her hard. She held on to his arms to keep from falling. There was nothing gentle about him. His rock solid body, his firm lips, his demanding tongue possessed her, and even though he was angry, she melted, hitting her ass against the smooth edge of the desk.

  He broke away, holding her close. "Get dressed, you're done dancing."

  "What?" She shifted, getting her feet under her and straightening. "We're not finished. We dance for another hour."

  "You. Are. Done." He reached behind her, grabbed her bag, and rummaged through the contents until he found her shorts and sweatshirt she'd worn to town.

  "Lee." She laid her hands on him. "Bantorus MC agreed to—"

  "I don't give a shit. This isn't a club decision. It's mine." He pulled the sweatshirt over her head.

  She sputtered, automatically thrusting her arms into the sleeves. "You can't do that."

  "Just did, doll." He leaned over and picked up her leg, hooking her shorts over her feet.

  She stared a hole into the top of his head and let him pull on her shorts. "No, what I'm telling you is you can't make me quit. I know the club rules. I've been around long enough that even without someone writing it down, a single club member can't order one of the Silver Girls around against her will."

  He straightened to his full height. She tipped her head back to look him in the eyes. Eyes that were no longer guarded. Eyes that excited her. Eyes that scared the hell out of her.

  "Lee—"

  "You're mine," he said, growling the last word out and shutting her up. "Grab your bag. We're out of here."

  He clasped her hand. She snatched her bag and had no time to argue, because he'd shocked her. On the way out, Lee spoke to Kurt, Risa, and Remmy, and she still couldn't open her mouth to object to his obsessive attitude. She also couldn't hear what he was saying over the music, the miners, and her heart racing.

  There was only one reason why Lee would claim her. He'd gone crazy.

  Out the back of the building, her bare feet hit the sidewalk, pebbles poked her soles. She jerked on his arm. "Ouch."

  "Shit," he muttered, his hands going to her waist. "I'll get your—"

  "Here." Kurt stood in the doorway and thrust out a pair of sneakers. "Risa will bring her other things back to the cabin."

  "Thanks, bro." Lee took the shoes, squatted down, and lifted her leg, again.

  She stepped back and grabbed the shoes from him, and slipped her feet inside. Alone with him now, she planted her hands on her hips. "What is going on with you?"

  "I think that's pretty clear," he said, circling her waist with his arm and guiding her away from the back door. "We're going back to the club, and we'll sort
our shit there."

  He stopped beside his Harley, took his helmet off the handlebar, and slipped it on her head. She stared at him. There was no way she could ride on his Harley. She knew the rules.

  "You can't do this," she whispered, her whole body vibrating.

  Members of Bantorus MC never put a woman on the back of a motorcycle unless the member was claiming her as his woman. Once they did, they stayed together forever. She'd watched Risa go on the back of Kurt's bike, and now look at her, she was married and pregnant. Natalie came home with Remmy on the back of his Harley, and she never left. Now they were married.

  "I'm doing it," he said, slipping on his gloves.

  She backed away. "Why?"

  "Jesus Christ," he said, lifting his hands out to his sides. "What do you want from me?"

  Guilt soured the moment. She hugged her middle. Maybe subconsciously she'd hoped he'd take her away, give her back the life she had with her uncle, and distract her from her fears.

  This morning, she'd spoken to Lee about taking the short time that they could get and enjoying each other. She groaned in embarrassment. He'd distanced himself from her, and she panicked. He deserved to know what she was thinking.

  "I want you," she said.

  He laughed harshly. "You've got me. I keep fighting you, and you don't fucking give up. I don't know how many other ways I can tell you that I'm no good. My soul's black, doll. Nothing you do is going to change that. I've done too many things to believe I'd bring anything good to a relationship, but if it makes me a selfish bastard to put you on my bike and keep you from stripping in front of those men in there, I'll do it."

  "You don't want me to strip?" she whispered.

  He shook his head. "Kills me. You've lived with Bantorus. I know what it's like there for the bitches, and you had sex with one man during that time. One, and I can't fault you there, doll. Remmy's a good man. An honest man. You could've done worse and you didn't. Now I have you, and I don't like the thought of some other man...men, seeing you."

  She approached him. "You want me."

  "I've told you many times that I do," he said.