by Shandi Boyes
That is when my eyes shift down to the splintered remains of a guitar sitting on the asphalt in the middle of the crash site, just to the side of the crumbled taxi. Adjusting my vision, I recognize the guitar in front of me.
“No!!!!” I scream loudly as I push past the police barrier and run to the shattered remains of the guitar I had brought Noah for his birthday last year.
That is when I spot a pair of jean covered legs lying down on the ground to my right.
“Noah” I whisper frantically as I start running towards him, he is surrounded by several paramedics. I quickly drop down on my knees and grasp his hand tightly in mine.
“Emily” he whispers hoarsely as his beautiful dark eyes turn to look at me.
“I’m here baby, I am here” I whisper gently as the tears stream down my face.
Noah’s body starts to violently convulse; it bends harshly off the asphalt before he starts having a seizure, causing a small trail of blood to dribble out of his mouth.
“Hold on Noah, please” I beg.
“We are losing him” yells one of the paramedics as I am suddenly grabbed from behind and dragged away as they attempt to save Noah.
“Noah!!” I continually scream over and over as I am dragged further and further away from him. I kick and scream frantically trying to get the person to loosen his grip around my waist.
Noah’s gaze turns towards mine and I pull my arms out in an attempt to reach him. His eyes never leave mine until I am pulled behind the police car and cradled in tight against a hard chest.
“Please let me go, I need to be with him” I beg into the eyes of the detective that had first noticed me at the police barrier.
“You need to let them help him Emily” he replies as his remorseful blues eyes fill with tears.
I attempt to pull away from the detective, but he holds me tight against him until the devastation of seeing Noah’s broken and damaged body lying on the pavement hits me full force that I start to uncontrollably sob.
Chapter 20
I am nervously tapping my foot up and down as I wait in the waiting room for any news on Noah. The paramedics had swiftly gathered Noah’s broken body and placed him in the back of the emergency helicopter that had landed on the field opposite the crash site. The detective that had dragged me away from Noah told me his name was Ryan and that he was a friend of Noah’s. He had recognised me from the time he had taken Noah’s statement when I was lying in bed unconscious after I had been roofied at Maverick’s bar. He was the detective that Noah had said helped him to stay out of jail.
Ryan had managed to call Jacob to tell him about the accident and he has stayed with me in the waiting room at Parkwood University Hospital the past several hours as we wait for news on Noah’s condition. The instant I spot a doctor dressed in scrubs, I peer down and notice the extensive red blood stains all over his blue theatre smocks. I quickly jump from my seat to stand in front of the surgeon, my eyes searching his for any indication on whether Noah is alive or not.
“We have managed to stop the internal bleeding and we had to remove part of his spleen but Noah has a cerebral edema to his brain, we managed to drain the hematoma that had pooled there”
“What does that mean?” I interrupt. I don’t understand all the medical terms he is using.
“We can repair the damage done to Noah’s body and the breaks to his bones but Noah has significant head injuries. His brain had suffered a large bleed that has caused it to swell. We managed to release the pressure in his brain and to drain the blood that was pooling inside but we won’t know the extent of the damage that has been done until we can conduct further tests” explains the surgeon.
“Can I see him?” I ask. The fact that Noah is breathing means that he is alive and I know he will fight to come back to me.
“We are in the process of transferring Noah to the Intensive Care Unit. Once he is stabilized, I will make sure that someone comes and collects you. I’m sorry I can’t give you any better news. It is going to be touch and go for Noah for the next few weeks but he seems to be fighting to hold on” says the surgeon as he turns and walks back into the doors of the theatre.
“Emily, is he ok?” questions Jacob panicked as he comes storming into the waiting room, just as the doctor walks back through the double doors.
“I don’t know, the doctor said its touch and go but he is trying to fight. They said something about his brain swelling?” I advise Jacob. I want to give him more information but in my panicked and shocked state I cannot relay anymore information to Jacob than what I was just informed.
Approximately four hours later, a nurse from the intensive care unit comes to collect us from the emergency department waiting room. Ryan, Jacob and I all follow closely behind her as we weave in and out of several long white corridors. Jacob has my hand grasped tightly within his as we reach the entrance of the intensive care unit. The middle aged African American nurse turns to face us, her face clearly showing her sympathy.
“I am sorry but we can only allow one visitor at a time while Noah is in the intensive care unit” she advises, looking between three sets of eyes that are all staring at her.
“You go first Emily” Jacob offers softly.
The nurse looks over at me and offers me a small smile as Jacob slowly releases his grip of my hand. I follow the nurse into the stark, cold, sterile hub of the intensive care unit. The instant we enter the double doors the nurse walks me towards a large sink.
“We need to keep the environment as sterile as possible so you need to ensure that you wash your hands thoroughly and use the sanitation solution every time you enter these double doors” she instructs.
I follow the guide that is placed above the large vanity on how to properly wash my hands to ensure I remove any possible bacteria, before drying them with a paper towel. We then walk through another lot of double doors, peering around the room I notice several doctors and nurses all wearing blue surgery scrubs. There is a large desk in the middle of the room and several beds lining the walls around them. You can hear the beeping of machines and the sounds of respirators as they work hard trying to kept the injured people in here alive. I follow the nurse until she stops in front of a bed, lifting my gaze to face her, I wonder why she has suddenly stopped, the gentleman lying in the bed isn’t Noah. It is only when I look more closely, I realise it is Noah.
“Oh Noah” I whisper heartbreakingly as a tear drops down onto my cheek.
He has extensive injuries to his face that has required them to bandage the top half of his head and one of his eyes. He has a ventilator tube inserted in his mouth, his chest rising and falling in rhythm to the machine that is located on the left side of the bed. His left leg is fully plastered and is being held up in a brace and he is wearing a light blue hospital gown. I slowly walk over towards him, I want to offer him comfort and I want him to know that I am here, but I also don’t want hurt him, so I slowly run my index finger down his badly bruised cheek.
“We had to put Noah on a life support system after he had some complications during his time in recovery” advises a male voice to my side.
I peer over and notice it’s the surgeon that originally came and told us about Noah’s condition in the emergency room several hours ago.
“Is he in any pain?” I question as my eyes fill with tears.
“We have him very heavily sedated but generally patients in a coma do not have any association with pain” he advises sincerely.
“He is a strong young man but he is in for the fight of his life” states the doctor as he gently places his hand on my shoulder.
I turn my tear stained face to look at the doctor before nodding. Noah is a fighter and he always will be and I know he will continue to fight to make sure he comes back to me. He won’t give up; he will fight to his very last breath.
I continue to sit next to Noah gently holding onto his hand. I don’t know what to say to him, but I know he would be able to feel my presence. I silently pray that he wi
ll be strong enough to survive this and I beg for him to wake up, but he lays there completely still on the hospital bed not making any movements, the only sound audible is the respirator as it continues breathing for him.
“I’m sorry sweetheart but visiting time is very limited in this section” advises a young female nurse.
I had been sitting on a hard plastic blue chair holding Noah’s left hand for the past half an hour. I had completely forgotten that Jacob and Ryan were standing outside waiting for their chance to visit.
“I’m sorry” I reply to the nurse as she hands me a tissue to blow my nose that was running from all the crying I have been doing.
I stand up from the chair and lean over Noah to give him a soft gentle kiss against his cold and bruised cheek.
“I love you baby” I whisper gently before following the nurse to the ICU exit.
The instant I exit the doors Jacob frantically runs towards me.
“Is he ok? Is he awake?” he questions panicked.
My eyes start to sting as they fill quickly with tears as I shake my head.
“No, he is on life support” I reply
I can feel a deep pit forming in my stomach as my vision starts to blur.
“Emily” Jacob states concerned, before all I see is blackness.
Chapter 21
The instant my eyes open, I peer around the room trying to work out my surroundings. I can see that I am surrounded by a blue curtain and when I look down I notice that I am still wearing my normal clothes, but I have an IV line inserted in my right wrist.
“Does he know about the baby?” questions Jacob, startling me as he moves away from a seat located in the corner of the room.
The memories of seeing Noah lying in coma in the hospital ICU comes crashing back to me and I remember fainting into Jacob’s arms.
“No, I never got the chance to tell him” I reply quietly as I scoot up higher in the bed.
“Is the baby ok?” I ask Jacob suddenly panicked, realising that I could have fallen and injured the baby when I fainted.
“Yes, the baby is fine. The doctor said you fainted because you haven’t had anything to eat or drink since last night” Jacob advises while looking at me with concern.
I hadn’t eaten anything since the pizza Noah and I had shared last night as this morning I was rushing to tell him the news about our baby. Understandably, I haven’t felt like eating anything since then.
I quickly pull off the sheet that is covering my legs and jump out of the small hospital bed, causing my head to get a rush of dizziness from standing too quickly. Jacob notices me swaying and quickly grabs me before I go falling towards the ground.
“You need to slow down Emily; Noah needs you in one piece” Jacob states roughly.
“I need to go and see him” I advise Jacob, as the tears start sliding down my face.
“He is going to fight this Emily; he won’t give up. I won’t fucking let him. I have already told him today that I won’t let him leave me like his brothers left him. You don’t know how fucking strong he is” Jacob replies angrily.
“I will be there for him every fucking day until he recovers from this. I will not leave his side” Jacob tells me while staring directly into my eyes.
This is the first time I have ever seen Jacob angry, the fury that has settled behind his eyes is unsettling. I gently reach out and wrap my arms around Jacob’s wide shoulders that are stiff to start with, until I can feel his defensive stance starting to lessen as he pulls me into a tight embrace.
‘Why fucking Noah, Emily? Hasn’t he been through enough in his life?” Jacob questions as his voice slowly cracks.
I try to think of a way of answering Jacob’s question, but I honestly don’t know what to say. How can you explain why one-person’s life is always riddled with such heartache and sadness? Noah didn’t deserve for any of this to happen to him, and just as his life was starting to follow the path he had chosen it all gets pulled out from underneath him. The reality of life is sometimes a little fucked up.
A short time later the doctor in the emergency department came and removed my IV. He gave me a very stern warning that I was to ensure that I was getting adequate nourishment a minimum three times a day, or that he would have no hesitation in admitting me into the hospital. I didn’t want to leave Noah’s side again, so I promised that I would eat and drink throughout the day as Jacob and I both briskly walked out of the emergency department back to the intensive care unit.
I pushed the buzzer to advise the nursing staff there was someone waiting in the corridor to enter and not long later a nurse opened the large locked double doors.
“Who are you here to see darling?” questioned the middle age nurse, who’s grey hair was pulled tightly back into a bun.
“Noah Taylor” I reply, as she looks down on the sheet in front of her.
“Okay darling, come in” she replies softly with a small smile on her face.
Jacob gives my hand a reassuring squeeze and as I step into the double doors his cell phone starts ringing loudly in his pocket, causing the nurse to narrow her eyes at him.
“Sorry” he apologizes quietly, as he answers his phone and walks down the corridor.
Noah is still in the exact same position I had left him in a few hours ago. I pull over the hard plastic chair so I can sit as close to him as possible. He looks like he is sleeping peacefully, his eyes occasionally moving underneath his eyelids, but he doesn’t look like he is in any pain. I gently grab a hold of his right hand when I notice that his wrist is wrapped in a heavy bandage, it wasn’t wrapped like that before I had fainted.
“He had a very large shard of glass from the taxi’s window embedded into his wrist that went unnoticed during his surgery. The doctors were able to remove it without surgery, but we won’t know if he will have any permanent restrictions in the movement of his hand until it fully heals” explains the nurse that had just let me in. I watch as she walks over and checks Noah’s IV lines.
“I need to give him some more sedation” she advises while offering a small smile.
She pushes a large syringe into the IV line and slowly pushes down on the syringe until all the clear liquid inside vanishes. Peering back towards Noah, I watch as his rapid eye movements start to lessen and his face appears to become more relaxed.
“You can talk to him; you never know he may be able to hear you” she advises gently, before she leaves me alone with Noah. I want to talk to him, but I don’t know what to say.
“I’m here waiting for you to come back to me Noah” I eventually whisper as a fresh batch of tears form into my eyes.
When my fifteen-minute block of visitation is over, I gently place a kiss on Noah’s cheek. I hesitate leaving him lying on the bed alone, before I slowly walk out of the unit, feeling my heart race in turmoil as my stomach swirls. I hate that I am being forced to leave him alone lying defenceless in that hospital bed.
“Can I talk to you for a minute Emily?” Jacob requests softly as I exit the double doors.
I nod my head and follow him into the waiting room where I notice Ryan is sitting in a chair talking into his cell phone. When he notices Jacob and I enter the room he looks up towards us, his eyes questioning if everything is ok. Jacob swiftly nods his head, causing Ryan to return to his phone conversation.
“I just got off the phone to Cormack, the record company are in the process of organising Noah to be moved to a private hospital in Ravenshoe. Cormack said that they are organising for a specialist in neurology from New York to fly in and assess Noah. They are making sure he has the best team of specialists looking after him” he advises as a small smile forms on his face.
The relief I feel knowing that Noah is going to have the best team of specialist looking after him gives me a small amount of comfort, but my stomach won’t stop swirling in torment.
“This is good news Emily; he is going to have the best team to ensure he has a full recovery. He is going to have the best specialist from around
the world” Jacob states, as I take in a long deep breath.
Once Ryan finishes his phone conversation he walks over to Jacob and I.
“I’m sorry but I have to go. Jacob you have my number, please keep me updated on his progress” he pleads, as Jacob nods his head.
Ryan’s gaze then turns towards me; his blue eyes look directly into mine. He looks like he wants to say something, but no words escape his lips. I reach out and give his hand a quick squeeze. I don’t really know Ryan, but I can see how much he cares for Noah and the fact that he has always watched over Noah the past few years make me grateful that Noah has someone like him in his life. Ryan gives my hand a quick squeeze back, before he briskly walks out of the waiting room.
Early the next morning Slater, Marcus and Nick all turn up looking as exhausted as I feel. Marcus instantly wraps his arms around me in a tight hug as he offers his condolences, while Jacob updates Nick and Slater on Noah’s condition. His condition hasn’t changed since they had brought him in. His brain is still swollen causing his comatose state, but they said that the bleed he had originally has been successfully repaired. So hopefully with some time Noah’s brain may start to return to its original size and then maybe he will wake up. The doctors said they can’t give us any guarantees, but the fact that he has made it through the first twenty hours is a good sign.