by Shandi Boyes
“That’s the first time I have ever heard you swear Em” he continues to laugh loudly before he slowly releases me from his grip.
I slap Jacob hard on his bicep, causing him to laugh even more, before he suddenly stops and stares towards Noah. I follow his gaze and notice that Noah has reacted to Jacob’s stirrings, just like he always does, his jaw is ticking and he has his fists clenched tight.
“I fucking knew you wouldn’t be able to help yourself” Jacob declares as he moves closer to the bed and wraps his hand tightly around Noah’s fist.
Chapter 26
“You have to prepare yourself that we may need to reinsert the ventilator if his oxygen level falls” advises Dr Kirkpatrick.
Dr Kirkpatrick is Noah’s specialist that was flown in from New York by Noah’s record label. After Jacob had stirred Noah he initially clenched his fists, but once he had unclenched them his hands moved to the respirator in an attempt to pull out the tube. I quickly motioned to one of the nurses outside of Noah’s room for assistance. She advised us that they have to slowly wean Noah off the ventilator system, and they couldn’t just simply remove it. Jacob ended up having to hold Noah’s hands down to stop him from pulling out the tube. It was distressing seeing him attempt to remove it, even though he still appears unconscious. It made me panic, wondering if he is able to feel pain.
The nurse gave Noah another sedative and around five minutes later he stopped fighting against Jacob’s hold. But you could see the torment in Jacob’s eyes from being forced to hold Noah down. We knew it was a good sign that Noah was starting to move, but it didn’t make Jacob’s guilt lessen any.
Over the next several days they slowly weaned Noah off the ventilator system and it was recorded that he has started taking his own shallow breaths. So today, Dr Kirkpatrick is going to remove the tube that is causing Noah discomfort in a hope that he will be able to maintain adequate breathing patterns on his own.
Jacob moves over towards me and we both stare at the monitors on the side of Noah’s bed, watching for any indication that his breathing levels are changing as Dr Kirkpatrick removes the tube. Noah’s heart rate slightly increases as he struggles to take the first few full unaided breaths, but his oxygen levels remain within the required safe range.
“He is doing it Jacob” I say proudly, while a small smile forms on my face and tears fill my eyes.
“He sure is Em” Jacob replies excitedly, as he wraps his arm around my shoulder.
I place my hand down on my rapidly growing bump, silently telling our baby that his daddy is coming home, he is coming back to us.
“He seems to be handling the removal of the ventilator well. We will continue to monitor him for the next several hours but if he maintains the current oxygen levels he has now he shouldn’t need to go back onto the ventilator. Now we need to start lowering the amount of medication we are giving him, as certain medications, such as morphine can cause patients to have side effects, such as shallow breathing. We will adjust his medication, but it will also be a slow process as we need to ensure that he is comfortable as he continues to recover” advises Dr Kirkpatrick.
Jacob and I both nod our heads in understanding but we both can’t stop smiling with euphoria that Noah has taken the first big step in his recovery, he is breathing unaided.
A few hours later I am tearfully saying goodbye to Jacob. Jacob was given a sentence of probation with an attached agreement that he would complete five hundred hours of community service, and he will also be required to attend counselling sessions for anger management. It means that he is no longer going to be able to stay by Noah’s side twenty-four-seven like he has been for the past two months.
“I will come back and visit every weekend, I promise” he advises while wrapping me in a tight embrace.
“If anything happens call me straight away” he requests, as his face goes as white as a ghost.
“I will Jacob, I promise” I reply while quickly wiping away the tears that had fallen from my eyes.
Jacob walks over towards Noah and gives him a man hug as he says goodbye, before he turns quickly and bolts out of the room. The guilt he feels for leaving Noah clearly written all over his face. Jacob had promised Noah at the start of his recovery that he would be by his side every day until he recovered, but this wasn’t Jacob’s choice and I am sure Noah would understand. I tried to tell Jacob that over the past three days but I don’t think it helped. Jacob and Noah have a bond closer than you can imagine, they are family even if they aren’t related by blood.
A few hours later, I was huddle into a ball in the reclining chair in the corner of Noah’s room. I was suffering from a severe case of morning sickness, even though it was in the late afternoon, when I notice a lady walk into Noah’s room. She didn’t seem to notice me in the corner and I watched her curiously as it was the first time I had seen her.
“Hmmm let’s see who I have here. Noah Taylor, singer, twenty-three years old, single, no children” she reads from a clipboard in front of her.
She moves in closer to Noah and her face appears to be stern as she looks down at him. She isn’t wearing a nurse’s uniform and she isn’t dressed professionally like the doctors do so I am curious to know who she is. She has blonde hair that is pulled back into a tight bun, is a medium build, and is approximately the same height as me. She doesn’t appear to be wearing make-up, but her skin is beautifully clear and flawless. If I had to guess her age I would say she would be late twenties, early thirties.
“So what happened to you?” she questions to Noah as she raises her eyebrows into her hairline, that is when I notice her eyes are hazel in colour.
“Drug overdose, drink driving…. hmmm” she questions, causing my heart to drop into my stomach.
“His taxi was hit by a semi-trailer” I state angrily, as I remove the blanket that was draped over me and stand from the reclining chair.
You can see the surprise all over her face, she clearly didn’t notice me sitting in the corner of the room. I don’t know who this lady is, but the fact that she was judging Noah like that made me furious.
“You don’t even know him; how could you judge him like that?” I question angrily, as tears form in my eyes.
Her eyes pop open wide in shock before she mumbles a quick apology and turns swiftly on her heels to bolt out of the room.
I stand still in shock, how could someone judge Noah like that just from a piece of paper they were holding in front of them. I feel my anger surging that I let out a furious growl in frustration as I start moving towards the corridor in search for the lady that just left.
As soon as I enter the corridor, I notice her leaning her head against the glass partition of the nurse’s quarters. As I approach her she lifts her head and her eyes turn to mine.
“I’m sorry” she apologizes quickly.
My frustration quickly starts to resign when I look into her eyes. You can see the immense amount of guilt she is feeling, and an intense amount of sadness that has settled deep within her soul.
“I should have never said what I said, I am so very sorry” she continues to apologize as her eyes fill with tears.
I nod my head at her, accepting her apology, before walking back into Noah’s room.
I know now why Noah is always protective and defends the people he loves, because his love is fierce and strong. When you have someone like Noah in your corner you know you are never going to have to fear anything. I want Noah to know that I am in his corner as well and I will fight for him just as fiercely as he would fight for me.
I move over towards Noah to lay down beside him. I don’t even care if I get reprimanded today, I need Noah as close to me as possible. I want to project to him how much I love him and I can’t do that by using simple words. So I snuggle in close and gently run my fingers over his chest and his face. He looks so peaceful today; his body has started to heal so well, that just by looking at him you could pretend he was asleep.
Approximately an hour later, I hea
r someone enter Noah’s room.
“I love you baby” I whisper softly, as I regretfully remove myself from Noah’s bed and peer towards the door. The sad and regretful eyes of the lady that had come into Noah’s room earlier are staring directly at mine.
“I thought I should properly introduce myself. My name is Dr Miller; I am a specialist in assisting comatose patients with their recovery” she introduces as she walks over to shake my hand.
I accept her handshake, while offering her a small smile. I am still not one hundred percent on what I think of Dr Miller. It’s hard to redo a first impression and hers was less than stellar.
“I have been hired by Noah’s record company to assist in his recovery” she elaborates, before walking over to Noah’s bed.
“I’m sorry for the way I judged you earlier Noah. I have only just returned to my position here a few weeks ago after having the last twelve months off. I don’t keep track of the news or media sites so I was unaware of what had happened” she apologizes.
Chapter 27
“Because of how long Noah has been immobile, it is imperative that he commences physiotherapy treatment on a twice daily basis” Dr Miller advises me.
After she had apologized to Noah yesterday she advised me that his recovery sessions will commence early the very next morning. She didn’t offer any reason for her sudden shift in demeanour, but she seemed to be trying to portray a business-like manner. I understand that she is here to help Noah, so as much as I am annoyed at what she had said to him, I will allow her to assist in Noah’s recovery, as I know that the record company wouldn’t have paid for her assistance if they didn’t think she could help.
“Physiotherapy for a coma patient is different from regular physio programs. His therapy will involve talking, touch, movement, massage and exercise of his limbs. It is important that you continue to talk to Noah as studies have shown that patients can hear when they are in a coma, as the cochlear nerve appears to function as normal.” advises Dr Miller before she moves over towards Noah on his bed.
“Noah’s therapy will be both physical and emotional” she advises as she gently starts massaging one of Noah’s feet.
“So what would you like to talk about today?” she questions Noah as she continues to massage his limbs, going from his foot to his calf muscle.
“Not the talkative type hey?” she asks looking over at me.
I can’t help but smile as she hits the nail on the head. Noah was never one that liked to talk about his emotions.
“Well I will tell you about me then. I have been married for three years, I got married when I was twenty-five years old and my husband was twenty-six” she advises as she lifts Noah’s leg and starts to gently bend the knee back.
“Do you want to talk about Emily?” she questions him “I know talking won’t take your pain away Noah, but it may help” she continues.
Dr Miller moves from one side of Noah’s bed to the other side, where she starts again massaging his foot, before she gently moves his leg in the same movement she had just done to the other side.
“I won’t pretend this is going to be easy Noah, but your pain will eventually lessen” she advises as Noah’s foot slightly kicks out against her movements.
“I met my husband at a college party” she giggles “It was like BOOM love right then and there”
“Have you ever been married?” she questions looking towards me.
My gaze turns down towards my engagement ring that is still firmly in place on my ring finger, before I slowly shake my head no at Dr Miller.
She continues working on Noah’s leg that was badly broken, the cast was only removed two weeks ago. You can see Noah’s face slowly constricts with pain, I move over towards him panicked by the expression of pain on his face. My eyes darting between Dr Miller and Noah. When she notices his pained expression she gently lowers down his leg.
“I’m sorry Noah” she advises with sympathy.
Dr Miller walks over towards the vanity that is located in Noah’s room and washes her hands in the sink. Once she dries them with a paper towel, she pulls out a bottle of sanitary solution and rubs a large amount over her hands, giving off a potent sanitary hospital smell. She then motions for me to join her in the corridor.
“He has done remarkably well today Emily” she advises while smiling.
“The fact he was able to register that I was moving his leg is a very positive sign that his brain function appears to be returning” she continues.
“Should we be worried that he was in pain?” I question.
The fact that Noah’s face clearly showed that he was in pain is very distressing to me.
“No, unfortunately if you want to ease Noah into recovery, we can no longer keep him under heavy sedation” she advises, as she rubs her hand over my crossed arms in an attempt to offer me comfort.
I look back towards Noah lying in the bed, I want him to recover quickly but I also don’t want him to be in any pain.
“He won’t be in an immense amount of pain Emily; I promise you” she advises as she offers me a small smile.
I nod my head swiftly as I wipe under my eyes to make sure my unshed tears haven’t decided to fall. Dr Miller gives my arm another gentle squeeze before she turns and walks down the corridor. As I enter back into Noah’s room I hear my cell phone ringing loudly in my bag. Pulling it out, I notice my mom’s picture is displayed on the screen.
“Hi Emily, darling” she greets, before I even have a chance to say hello.
“Hi Mom” I reply, only vaguely choking with emotion.
“Is everything ok with Noah?” she questions quickly.
“Yes he is doing well today, you would be incredibly proud of him” I tell her.
I know I am; I whisper to myself.
“Let me talk to him” she requests.
I stop fidgeting and my face morphs into confusion.
“Put him on the phone darling, I want to talk to my boy” she requests.
“Okay” I reply softly into the phone, before walking slowly towards Noah.
I gently place the phone down against his ear and I can hear the muffled words of my mom talking to him. I can’t understand anything that she is saying, but once the line goes quiet I lift the phone back towards my ear where I can hear the quiet sobs of my mom coming down the line.
“You look after my boy” my mom whispers, as a small tear drips down my face.
“I will; I promise” I reply before disconnecting the call.
I drop the phone back down into my bag and quickly try to wipe away the tears that have fallen. I try to remember what Dr Miller had advised me earlier today, Noah’s recovery isn’t just about movements it’s about emotions too. So I sit down next to Noah on the bed and start talking to him.
“So what took you so long to finally ask me out on a date?” I question him.
I have asked him similar questions before but he would only smile his panty dropping grin, before he would shake his head softly, completely ignoring my question.
“You can’t run away now Noah” I declare cheekily, as I lay my head down on his chest and listen to the beating of his heart.
Boom boom, boom boom. Nothing sounds more perfect than the beat of Noah’s heart.
Chapter 28
The next five days Dr Miller continues with her twice daily physiotherapy sessions with Noah. I watch from the corner of the room as she talks to him, asks him questions and tells him stories about her life. She seems to have grown fond of Noah over the past week, just like everyone who meets him does. He has that allure that attracts everyone, it doesn’t matter if you are young or old, if Noah shines his light on you, you can feel its warmth deep within.
“Today we are going to try something a little different” Dr Miller advises Noah, as she gestures for me to move closer.
“Lay down” she advises me.
I look towards her surprized. I have been sneaking into Noah’s bed regularly, but no one has ever given me permissio
n to do so. Dr Miller notices my shocked expression before she smiles gently and motions for me to do as requested. I snuggle in closer to Noah’s side, like I normally do when I am alone with him.
“Now close your eyes and listen carefully to me speaking” she instructs.
I quickly close my eyes as requested, and because Noah is no longer on the ventilator machine, the room is plunged into silence.
“Take in some long deep breaths and feel yourself relaxing” requests Dr Miller, as I hear her moving around the room.
I quickly pop open my eyes and notice that she is massaging Noah’s left side of his body, while I am cuddled into his right side, caressing his body within mine. Dr Miller narrows her eyes at me when she notices my eyes are open, causing me to quickly close my eyes.