Through the Window 2

by Mary Jane Ballew

  Elizabeth smiled, “Thank you for saying so, William,” she said somewhat curtly.

  Darcy thought he detected something in her voice that made him wonder if she were perhaps still angry with him. “You slammed the door when you left my study before,” he commented.

  Elizabeth arched her brow, “Did I?” she asked pretending not to know what he was talking about. “I was not aware that I did so. As I recall, you accused me of behaving like my mother and then dismissed me from your presence. So I did as you ordered me to and left.”

  Darcy took in a small breath and thought about their argument, “Then you are still upset with me for not helping you where Miss Bingley is concerned?” he questioned her. “You will not see my point in this?”

  Elizabeth shook her head, “I was not angry with you because you do not wish to help me,” she told him. “I was, however, hurt by your remarks and unwillingness to discuss the matter further. William, you sent me away as if I was nothing more than a servant. You compared me to my mother,” she accused him.

  Before Darcy could respond to her further, Charles announced, “I believe we are ready to leave.” Darcy sighed in frustration as he looked back to Elizabeth. She arched her brow and said nothing more as she walked over to get her cloak.

  Moments later, Darcy guided both Elizabeth and Georgiana out to the waiting carriage. He wished more than anything they could remain home and talk further, but that was impossible. He knew Elizabeth was angry with him, but he was not about to change his mind on the matter.

  Chapter Nine

  Caroline stood off to the side of the room watching as the other couples were dancing. She regretted allowing herself to be persuaded by Charles into coming along. She would have been completely content to remain at Windham House, but she felt obligated to come when Charles asked her to do so in order to help Jane navigate the more complicated social circles of London society. Caroline thought it an odd request but relented in the end because she had no excuse for refusing to go.

  She looked over and saw Charles dancing with Jane and again wondered why it was so very important that she come this evening. Jane was doing fine; she had already danced with three gentlemen and seemed to be enjoying herself, as were Kitty and Georgiana.

  “Caroline,” Elizabeth said as she came up to join her. “I just wanted to say I was so delighted that you were feeling better and able to come this evening. I would have felt very uneasy knowing you were alone at Windham House and unwell.”

  Caroline looked at Elizabeth and feigned a smile. “It is very kind of you to say so, Elizabeth,” she responded in an aloof manner. “I see that Jane is fitting right in with London’s society. She seems to have won over Lady Knowles.”

  Elizabeth looked over at her sister and Charles, “I think Jane will always have an easy time fitting in no matter where she is. She is very kindhearted,” she told her.

  Caroline thought about her sister-in-law for a moment. In Elizabeth’s opinion of Jane, she found she had to agree. “Elizabeth, would you take a walk with me? Lady Knowles has some lovely paintings in the outer halls that she does herself. I think you might enjoy seeing them.”

  “All right, if you like,” Elizabeth agreed as they walked over to the door and out into the long hallway. Elizabeth looked at the paintings as they walked past. Each one was a different scene of London in winter, summer, spring, and autumn. “These are very lovely. Lady Knowles is a very talented artist.

  “Lady Knowles has many talents,” Caroline told her. She walked over and stood in front of a painting of Hyde Park in the winter. “I think I like this one the best.”

  “It is very beautiful,” Elizabeth commented.

  Caroline chewed her bottom lip and thought about her time with Mr. Fitzwilliam and how at ease she felt with him. She thought about what Elizabeth had said to her about finding someone whom she could love and who would love her. She turned to Elizabeth. “You are right,” she began to say. “What you said before about Jane. You are right; she is very kind, and a most agreeable girl. I know you will not believe me, but I have always thought so,” she told her honestly.

  Elizabeth’s eyes narrowed just a bit, “Caroline, I did not mean to bring up the past when I said what I did before,” she assured her.

  “You did not,” Caroline said. “But if as you said before we are to get along, it probably would be best if I did explain myself. I do so now with the express desire to make known my part in attempting to end Charles’s acquaintance with your sister when she first came to London.”

  Elizabeth was not sure that this was the time or place so she said, “Very well, if you feel that way, perhaps we could talk at another…”

  Caroline interrupted her. “I am sure Mr. Darcy told you it was I who persuaded him to speak with Charles and end things with Jane?”

  “Yes, he did tell me that. Although I think you should know he did not put all the blame on you for his actions,” she told him. “William knows he was accountable for his part. As I said, it is in the past; all is forgiven.”

  Caroline shook her head, “But can it truly be forgiven if all is not made known and amends are not offered?” she said thinking about her own situation with Lord Ashworth and how she had been unable to truly let it go. “To leave things as they are, it will always be there. It will fester and continue to…”

  “Caroline, I hold no ill will towards you,” Elizabeth said interrupting her. “And I can promise you; Jane does not either.”

  “Yes, but we are not friends. I am not close to either you or Jane, and she is now my sister,” Caroline said honestly.

  “Perhaps that will change given time,” Elizabeth suggested.

  “There really is no reason to believe that, is there though?” Caroline asked. “We are civil to one another; we may be polite in mixed company, but truly, there is little chance we will ever really be friends if things remain as they are. I have watched you with Georgiana. The two of you have bonded as much as any sisters ever could, and yet Jane and I remain as distant as we always were.” Before Elizabeth could say anything more, Caroline said, “I did not want my brother to marry Jane because I did not think well of your family.”

  Elizabeth took in a small breath and arched her brow. She did not want to have this discussion now but did not know what she could do to prevent it. “I am aware of that fact,” was all she said.

  “I thought Jane was beneath my brother in both standing and connections,” she admitted. “In truth, I wanted to dislike her. In fact, I did my best to distance myself from her. I kept telling myself that I would not be taken in by Jane no matter how kind, sweet, and genuine she was. I persuaded myself that it was all for show, that Jane could not possibly be as caring and kindhearted as she presented herself to be. But in the end, I find I have been mistaken all along. Jane is a very agreeable girl. She is all gentleness and kindness. If I am honest, I will admit to you now that she has always been the absolute perfect match for Charles. It was only my dislike for you and your family that kept me from seeing that.”

  Elizabeth was unsure what to say. “I find myself speechless, Caroline,” she told her. “I do not know what to say. I am glad you see things differently now than you once did where Jane is concerned.”

  Caroline considered if she should say more or not, “I was jealous of Mr. Darcy’s attention to you,” she said as she struggled with her emotions. “I believed that I could succeed in my endeavors to persuade him to marry me, and you were an obstacle to that end. I see now how foolish I was to think he ever saw me as anything more than Charles’s sister. I am an acquaintance to him only because of my brother. I realize he never held any true feelings for me,” she admitted somewhat bitterly.

  “I…” Elizabeth chewed her bottom lip and tried to think of how to respond. “Again, I find I do not know what to say.”

  “There is nothing for you to say. I was merely making known my reasons for disliking you. I wanted you to know that I believe I am finally through the worst of it. I
can see that Mr. Darcy cares very deeply for you, and I truly do wish you well,” she said as she swallowed her pride just a little. “We may never be true friends, but I do hope that by being honest with you now you will not be uneasy. I hope you will believe me when I say that I do not wish to cause you or Jane any misfortune.”

  Elizabeth considered how she would respond. She was not sure if she should believe Caroline or not. She had been deceitful before, and there was no reason to think she would not be again. “Caroline, I find myself puzzled by this sudden change that has come over you since coming to London,” she told her plainly. “What has brought about this change in you; what has caused you to think on these things so differently?”

  “I think, perhaps, it was when I recently looked in my mirror and saw the truth of the situation staring back at me,” she said, with a touch of melancholy in her voice.

  Elizabeth felt a little frustrated by Caroline’s vague answer but decided to leave the matter there. Instead, she asked, “Where does that leave you now, then? What is your hope for the future?”

  “I cannot really say,” she told her as they walked back to join the others attending the ball. “I have thought on the matter for some time, but I am no closer to understanding my feelings than I was a week ago when we last spoke.”

  Georgiana allowed Captain Hathaway to escort her back over to Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam after their dance was finished. “I enjoyed our dance, Miss Darcy,” he told her.

  “As did I, Captain Hathaway,” she responded.

  “I did not have an opportunity to tell you when we were last together at Hallowell, but I very much enjoyed your playing the pianoforte. It was a remarkably complex piece, and you played it beautifully,” he told her.

  Georgiana smiled, “Thank you for saying so,” she said softly. “I did work for some time learning it.”

  “Well, I believe you play very well. In fact, I believe you play better than anyone I have ever heard,” he complimented her. “Now, I will leave you in the capable hands of your cousin,” he said as he released her arm and turned to go.

  Georgiana turned to Kitty who was standing there along with her brother and Colonel Fitzwilliam. “I wonder where Elizabeth has gone?” she whispered softly to Kitty.

  “I believe she went with Miss Bingley through those doors over there,” she said pointing to them.

  Georgiana looked over in the direction she was pointing. “I wonder at how much time Lizzy is spending with Miss Bingley of late?” she commented. “It is rather odd that they should be together so often.”

  “I just hope Miss Bingley is not up to something to cause trouble for Lizzy and Mr. Darcy,” Kitty said, sounding somewhat suspicious.

  “Why would you think that?” Georgiana asked her.

  “Because Miss Bingley has never liked Lizzy or Jane,” she told her.

  Georgiana narrowed her eyes just a bit, “That is true,” she commented. “I did think it strange that Miss Bingley wanted to come to London with her brother, instead of going and spending time with her sister.”

  “I thought it odd that both Lizzy and Jane should be so eager to have her come as well,” Kitty said. “At first, I did not think they were, but then they seemed to have a change of heart on the matter.”

  Georgiana tried to think of something more to say, “How did your visit with Miss Lucas go today?”

  “Very well,” Kitty told her. “She is very excited to be in town, and of course, to see Charlotte. Lizzy has invited them to come tea along with Charlotte.”

  “Oh, I am sure Lizzy will be happy to see her friend Charlotte again,” Georgiana remarked.

  “I think so, she has not seen her since the wedding,” Kitty commented. “I can hardly believe it is so long ago now. We are already very nearly through November. Time has gone so quickly; I hardly know what to think of it.”

  Georgiana chewed her bottom lip, “You are right about that, Kitty; time has indeed gone by very fast. I was thinking that as I was dancing with Captain Hathaway. Seeing him all grown up is so very strange. Of course, he is older than I am by several years, but I still have some memories of him from before he and Richard went into the military.”

  “Captain Hathaway certainly seems to be nice,” Kitty commented. “When Colonel Fitzwilliam was finished with his appointment this morning, he returned with Captain Hathaway. I introduced him to Maria, and Lady Lucas. Maria was of course, very happy to see Colonel Fitzwilliam again.”

  “From what you say, Maria seems very taken with my cousin, I think…” Georgiana said offhandedly.

  “I do believe she is. She whispered to me before we left her company that she wished she could spend more time with him,” Kitty told her.

  Georgiana furrowed her brow just a little. She felt confused by Kitty’s reaction to Miss Lucas’s attention towards the Colonel. She would have thought with how much time Kitty had been spending with Richard that she would not look kindly on any other ladies making known their desire to be with him as well. There was a part of her that wanted to ask Kitty outright what her feelings were concerning her cousin, but she knew it was not her place to do so. After a few moments of awkward silence, it was Kitty who spoke first.

  “I wanted to thank you for playing the pianoforte for me so that I might sing for Lord and Lady Fitzwilliam,” Kitty said. “You play so beautifully. I liked hearing you play. Mary told me that it was Mozart Sonatas. I must say, I thought it very moving.”

  “Thank you, Kitty, that is very kind of you to say,” Georgiana told her.

  “I do not know as much as I could about music. In fact, I often feel silly that I do not know all the different composers and musical selections. Even when I sing, I rely on Mary to give me guidance,” Kitty remarked.

  “Kitty, you sing so beautifully,” Georgiana told her. “Everyone thought so. You should not be concerned that you do not know the composers the way that Mary and I do. We both have a love for music that is beyond that of most young ladies, but you are so very gifted. I have never heard a prettier voice than yours.”

  “Thank you for saying so,” Kitty smiled. “You know so very much about music, so to have you think I sing well is truly a compliment.”

  Georgiana was surprised by Kitty’s remarks. With how confidently she sang, Georgiana was surprised to hear her so full of doubt about her talent. Before she could say anything more, a young gentleman came up and asked Kitty to dance. She watched as one of the young officers in Captain Hathaway’s regiment escorted her out to the dance floor with the other couples. Moments later, Richard came up and stood next to her. “Are you enjoying yourself, cousin?” he asked her.

  Georgiana nodded her head. “I am very much, yes,” she told him.

  “You are not feeling uneasy, I hope?” he commented.

  She looked at him and smiled, “I assure you, cousin, I am not,” she said. “I wonder though if you are feeling uneasy this evening?”

  Richard furrowed his brow, “No, why should I be uneasy?” he asked her.

  “I am sure I do not know,” she replied. “I only asked you because you asked me if I were. I assumed that you asked me because you were feeling uneasy yourself, and wondered if anyone else might be feeling so.”

  Richard was just about to respond when he realized that if he did, he would only make her angry. “I see, so you are attempting to prove to me once again that you are as capable as Miss Bennet in dealing with being among so many strangers without feeling uneasy.”

  Georgiana was determined not to let him upset her. While it was true she had felt a little anxious a few times over the course of the evening; she would not tell him so. “I am not attempting to prove anything to you, cousin,” she assured him. “You asked if I am uneasy, and I can tell you in all truth; at this moment, I am perfectly at ease.”

  Richard decided it was best to say no more on the matter. He looked around the room and counted three separate young men looking in her direction, “You seem to be very popular this evening,” he said.<
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  Georgiana laughed, “No more so than you, I think,” she replied.

  “I noticed you have danced two times with John Hathaway,” he commented sounding somewhat disapproving.

  Georgiana nodded her head again and smiled “Yes, I have,” she said as she watched Kitty dancing. “And you have danced two times with Kitty,” she responded.

  Before Richard could say anything more to her, one of the other officers stepped over to them. “Miss Darcy, I was wondering if you might care to dance with me?”

  Georgiana smiled, “Yes, I will dance with you, Lieutenant Maines,” she answered him as he took her hand in his.