by Jordan Marie
I’ve had a busy day of meeting everyone here and for the most part I’ve liked everyone. Dani and Torrent are easily my favorites, both have been really nice to me. Torrent is pregnant, but I’m doing my best to ignore that. She doesn’t need me melting down like I did with Nicole. This is life and I need to learn to face it.
No matter how much it sucks.
It’s only nine, and I don’t normally go to bed so early, but I’m exhausted and we’re finally out of Montana. I’m not looking for King to barge in at any minute to steal Ryan away, so I’m going to bed. Tomorrow I will worry about what I’m going to do during the short time I’m living in Tennessee. I need to have a plan before Diesel gets out of rehab. I can’t handle being around him… I just can’t.
I climb into the bed, doing my best to ignore the fact that Diesel has slept here before. I don’t want to think about that. I was afraid the down comforter and soft white sheets would smell like him, but they don’t. They smell fresh, as if they have just been laundered and I would suspect I have Dani to thank for that. Hopefully that will help me sleep.
I’m reaching over to turn off the lamp on the bedside table when there’s a knock at my door. I don’t get time to say anything—or even react—before the door is opened. I started to lock it, but I didn’t want to in case Ryan came to find me. Turns out that was a good plan, because the little guy is standing at the door looking nervous.
“Rory?”
“Yeah baby?”
“Can I… sleep with you tonight?”
“I thought you were sleeping in Dakota’s room and watching movies tonight?” I ask with a smile, and sitting up as he walks over to me.
“I thought you might get scared without me. You know to watch over you,” he says his bottom lip quivering, although he rolls it inward and does his best to hide it. Something settles inside of me. I thought when Ryan got back here among his family and friends that I’d become just an afterthought in his life. Knowing he still needs me means everything, even if the reason behind it sucks.
“I really was needing you, but I didn’t want to bother you when you were with your buddies.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I guess that sounds really lame, huh?”
“No. I mean you’re a girl. Sometimes you need someone to look out for you. Since Dad’s not here, you kind of need me Rory,” he says sounding proud. He goes to the opposite side of the bed and crawls up in it and scoots over to the center. I pull his back into me and curve my body around him, holding him close. I kiss the top of his head and take a deep breath.
“You’re right, Ryan,” I whisper. “I definitely need you.”
His little hand touches mine that’s resting against his stomach.
“I need you too, Rory. Love you.”
My heart flips against my chest as I close my eyes.
“I love you too, baby. I love you too.”
30
Crusher
I snap the picture of Rory and Ryan sleeping and text it to Diesel. When Dani couldn’t find him in Dakota’s room, she woke Dakota who explained that Ryan missed his mom. Diesel is planning on keeping Rory, but if he doesn’t make it work he may have a revolt on his hands. Those two love each other. I hope for Diesel’s sake he can make it work. Rory’s a good woman. My hand moves up to the side of my face and I grin remembering her slap at the hospital.
She’s also got a hell of an arm on her.
Diesel doesn’t reply to my text, but then I didn’t expect him to. The trip wore him out today and he still insisted on doing three hours of therapy after that. He practiced the exercises they gave him to help his vocal cords and cognizant recognition. It sounded like a bunch of crap to me, but apparently Diesel is aware of the words he wants to use, but sometimes uses the wrong ones. The therapists are training him to think over each word before choosing them, as well as helping his vocal cords to make the sounds again.
The man has a long road ahead of him, but he’s pushing himself like crazy. He’s already aced hurdles they thought would only be reachable a month from now. Then again, the doctors don’t know Diesel. Plus, Diesel’s on a mission. He’s going to get back to his family and seek revenge and he’ll do it much sooner than anyone thought possible. That picture I sent him will just be added incentive. Thank God the doctors had the nurses working his legs and arms while he was in the coma. If they hadn’t, his recovery would have been much harder. He’s taking steps now—small ones and he falls back into his wheelchair afterwards, but that’s still a huge milestone. Diesel has plans and most of them revolve around that woman lying in his bed and his little boy.
I move out of the room and nod to Rebel who I have stationed by their door. Until we find King and destroy him and everything he thinks he has, Rory and Ryan will be watched constantly. I have two men staying with Diesel at the rehab facility and made sure he has his weapons with him. He’s as safe as I can make him, but I’ll feel better when he gets back home. Fuck, I’ll feel better when he steps back up as president. I took over out of necessity, but I don’t want this damn job. Some men slide into the role like a second skin. Me? My fucking skin breaks out in hives and itches like a motherfucker. If it wasn’t for Dani opening her legs and showing me heaven anytime I demand it, I’d be going insane. She’s complaining now that I keep her walking bowlegged. She’s not wrong. The damn woman will probably grieve when things go back to normal, though. The thought makes me grin. I look down the hall to our bedroom and wish I could join her right now. I still have a few other things to do first. I’ve taken over as president so that means duty over pleasure, even though Dani is the sweetest pleasure I’ve ever known in my life. This shit gets over, I’m moving my family back to our lake house and forbidding the men to come around for a fucking month.
I walk into the office which used to be an old classroom, but we’ve done a good job of converting the place. The clubhouse is new. The old elementary school was up for auction and the club got it for a steal. I’m sure the county would have tried to block our purchase if they’d known, but sucks for them they didn’t. Diesel made these moves before he left and it was fucking genius. It gives the club all the room we need, a huge area outside and a gating system that would rival a prison. We’ve still got some work on the garage, but for the most part it’s a sweet set up.
I called a meeting on my way over here. There are things we need to do to get ready. I don’t know where King is at, but I do know he’s definitely planning something. The minute he finds out we have Rory and Ryan—all bets are off.
Scorpion, Fury, and Gunner are all waiting on me when I get there. I do a double take when I see Devil. It’s good to see the bastard. He’s been back for a while, but he hasn’t been active with church since he returned. He had a fuck of a lot of healing to do himself. He lost an eye and still has a slight limp, but that’s improving. The best thing to see is that shit-eating smile that’s spread over his face.
“Look what the cat dragged in,” I say with a smirk, reaching out to slap my hand against his as they clasp and slap him on the shoulder.
“Kiss my ass,” he laughs. “I’ve been here, it’s good to have you back, though. How’s our boy?”
“I got him settled and have a few prospects on him. He’s not happy, but the way he’s pushing it, he’ll be back here in no time. Which is part of the reason for this meeting. Gunner?” I yell as I go and take my seat at the head of the table. That’s another thing that makes my damn skin itch. Fury is in my seat. I’m sick of being in Diesel’s chair. I can’t wait until that changes.
“Yo,” Gunner says, looking as tired as I feel.
“I know we’ve turned that old science lab into a gym, but I need you to get some prospects to help you fix that empty maintenance room up for a private area for Diesel. He needs a place for his rehab here, and he won’t feel comfortable doing that shit in front of others. He hates his limitations and he sure as fuck doesn’t want us to see him at his weakest.”
“Like any of
us would fucking care,” Devil growls. I raise my eyebrow at him, because we both know he pulled the same shit. He gets the meaning of my look and flips me off, making me almost laugh. I’m too damn tired however, to give into it.
“I’ll get it done,” Gunner responds and I nod.
“Scorpion, have you had any luck figuring out King’s movements?”
“Still doing some research. We know the bastard took his stepbrother’s private jet to visit him. He came back a week later, but there’s been very limited movement since. We’re monitoring his place and I’ve hacked into what accounts I’ve been able to get access to. Still, there’s nothing big and no red flags—at least not yet.”
“Fuck, that’s not good. You know he’s not letting Rory and Ryan go that easily and the minute he finds out that Diesel is alive…” I break off, rubbing the back of my neck
“Yeah,” Fury growls.
“Check under every fucking stone and do it hard and fast. If King does so much as pull his dick out to piss off his back porch I want to hear about it. We’re about to go to war boys and when we do, I want to make sure the only ones left standing are us. You get me?”
Everyone shows their agreement and then my gaze centers on Devil. He knows what’s coming.
“Dragon called,” he says. “I want him. He’s mine. No one else’s, you get me?”
I frown.
“I can’t be sure he’s still involved…” I start, but I’m lying.
“Bullshit,” Devil says, calling me on my bluff. “If Ryan told Dragon that a man named Wolf helped kill his mother, then Wolf is in it up to his fucking eyeballs. Eyeballs that I’m going to rip out one by one,” he says, and I don’t doubt that he’s planning on doing that—hell, he’s probably dreaming about it and I can’t blame him a bit. “Have we talked to Rory about any of it?”
“No. She lost a baby and putting the pieces together, she lost that baby protecting Ryan. She needs to heal and Diesel wants us to go slow there. I… I may have Dani talk to her.”
“That’d be a good move. Dani’s been through hell herself, she can help Rory,” Gunner says in agreement. He’s right, I know he is, but that doesn’t make it easier. Talking about the past may bring shit up that Dani has buried. I hate even the thought of making that happen. I’ve dedicated my fucking life to destroying her demons. I don’t want to bring them back.
I just may not have a choice this time.
“How is Diesel, really?” this comes from Fury and I think about how to answer him.
“Physically he’s improving. He’s compartmentalizing shit and dealing with it slowly. He wants revenge, but first on his list is Rory and Ryan.”
“He loves the woman?” Scorpion asks, sounding shocked. Then again, he would. Diesel—the Diesel we all remember—swore off women completely. Of course, Rory is no ordinary woman.
“I didn’t ask him to share his feelings over a glass of wine, but she definitely means something to him.”
“The baby… was it his?” Devil asks.
“That’s the million-dollar question. If I was a betting man, I’d say yes, but again I’m not getting into that. We prepare for war and we prepare to go hard. The rest of the shit, Diesel and Rory will have to work that out. We just need to make sure they get that chance.”
I stare around the table at my brothers. They might be my second family, but they’re home. This club is home. I’ve been in war before, with different brothers, but my confidence in them was just as strong as it is with these guys. We’ll win this war.
I just hope we do it without casualties.
31
Diesel
My phone buzzes on the table by my bed. I stretch to reach it and grab it with just the tips of my fingers. I’m too damn sore to do much more than that. Between the trip here and the workout I gave my body with the PT when I got here, I’m fucking killed and so damn sore I can’t tell what part of me hurts the worst. I hope it’s Rory messaging me, but it’s not. It’s Crusher. I sigh.
I’ve got so much shit to fix and even more shit running through my head. I need to pull it all together, but getting myself where I can at least have a full conversation with Rory has to happen first. But, it might be a very real possibility that I’ve put her through so much that she doesn’t give me a chance to fix anything. I deserve that, but I sure as hell don’t want to accept it.
When I open the text that pain in my chest hits hard and a burn tears through me from my gut to my heart. Rory is sleeping with Ryan curled into her. Her hand is protectively placed around him and she’s sleeping.
Sleeping with my boy.
Sleeping with my boy, under my roof.
Sleeping with my boy, under my roof, and in my bed.
In my bed.
In my bed.
One by one the thoughts hit me. One by one they slip deep inside of me and I know I’ve got to find my way back to her. I’ve let my past color everything I’ve done. I’ve let bitches like Vicki and Violet get into my head and I couldn’t see what was right before me. Fuck, even that’s wrong. I saw it, I was just afraid to trust it… afraid to trust Rory.
I’ve got a lot of shit to make up for, hopefully she won’t make me wait forever to forgive me.
Tomorrow I’ll talk to the doctor and get the tests that I need to have done. If Rory says I was the father to her child… Fuck. There are things I need to know. I’ve been unfair to her from day one, but now there’s one thing I’m sure of.
If Rory makes me wait to forgive me, I’m okay with that.
Rory is someone I’d wait forever on.
Forever.
I don’t know what kind of shit Vicki fed King, but I know Ryan is mine. I don’t know how she got King to believe otherwise, but that’s not my problem. The bastard is as fucked in his head as Vicki was, it’s just that his drug of choice seems to be power. I’m going to use that against him. When I strike I want it so he doesn’t know what hit him and when he finds out… it will be too late to fucking do a thing about it. I’ll take everything from him, one piece of his precious empire at a time. No one lays hands on my family. No one touches my woman.
King is a walking dead man. I just need time to get on my feet.
At that thought, I ignore the soreness and bone deep exhaustion I feel and I start doing the exercises they gave me to do, right here in my bed. The pain is excruciating, but it’s no worse than being here when I should be in my bed with my family.
I hope Rory is ready because I’m coming home to her and this time when I claim her, nothing is going to take her away...
Not even my own stupidity.
32
Rory
Two Weeks Later
“This is ridiculous. You can’t just keep me here as a prisoner. I have rights!” I huff at Crusher. He’s holding his head down, but when he looks up at me I can see the irritation on his face.
He’s irritated with me! The asshole!
“You’re not leaving, Rory. It’s not safe.”
“Ryan is here, he’s safe. That’s all that matters.”
“It’s not all that matters,” Crusher argues, but I ignore him.
“If I’m not here I can keep King looking in other directions. I know how my brother works. It’s best for all involved—especially Ryan—if I leave,” I respond and I don’t even care that it practically sounds like I’m pleading with him.
I am desperate. I’ve been here for two weeks and there are several reasons I need to leave. The first, and most important, is that Diesel will be back before long. I have no idea when, because I refuse to take his calls and I won’t ask the others about him. I know that they are working on a room close to his. They’re putting exercise equipment in it and things of that nature. That tells me he will be here sooner rather than later.
That means I need to be gone.
“Rory—”
“Crusher, you don’t know my brother. I need to be out there pulling his attention away from finding Ryan.”
“You’re
not putting yourself in danger. You did that already to protect him and we’re all more grateful than I could ever tell you, but that’s not happening again.”
“It’s not your choice,” I argue back.
“Rory, I’m protecting you and I’m going to do it no matter what kind of fit you throw. So, how about you do me a favor and let it go for now.”
“I don’t need protecting. Ryan does. I told you, I’m not important here—”
“The fuck you aren’t.”
My body locks as I hear Diesel from behind me. I feel like my knees might give out on me. I turn around slowly—dreading to face him, but knowing I don’t have a choice.
“You’re back.”
The words form, but they feel like molasses, sticking against my tongue and are hard to force out. I just thank my lucky stars they don’t come out as breathless as I feel. Diesel looks good. He’s gained a little more weight, some of his muscle tone is back and although he still looks pale, the improvement in him is a million times better. His mane of hair is pulled up on top of his head, some of it falling down surrounding his face and with that ferocious look on his face he reminds me of a lion. You want to run your fingers through that mane and touch him to see if it is soft, but you know if you do that you’ll get your hand taken off.
“And thank God you are. Because now you can deal with your woman,” Crusher says, standing up so quick his chair falls back and clangs loudly on the floor. “I’m out,” he says shaking his head. “Take it easy on each other,” he cautions and with a slap on Diesel’s back leaves us alone, closing the door.
“I’m not your woman,” I tell him, denying Crusher’s words.
“You are.”
“Not anymore. You had a decision, you made a choice. That ship has sailed.”