by Candis Terry
For a few moments, she was the master of his sighs, and moans, and shivers. But then he slid the little tank top from her body, and laid her back on the sofa. The leather was cool on her spine as she watched him roll on the condom he’d removed from his pocket. She wanted that ridge of male heat inside her so badly she could barely think. He smiled as if he could read her mind, and he followed her down. His warm skin pressed against the length of her. She wrapped him in her arms and legs, and he entered her with slow, sweet possession until he completely filled her.
Urgency aside, he took his time making love to her. Between each controlled push of his hips, his unhurried, deliberate kisses seduced. His hot mouth and tongue teased her breasts. She arched against him. He held himself in check until she felt the slow, steady pressure build inside her and the tingles start up from her toes. She moaned and his thrusts became faster. Harder. Pushing her. Absorbing her.
“Take me with you, Angelface,” he whispered against her hair. “You’re everything to me.”
Her fingers slid down his back and bit into the flesh of his tight buttocks. He slid his hands beneath her butt and lifted her. He thrust hard and her breath left her body as intense white-hot pleasure washed over her skin, grabbed her, and turned her inside out. Wave after wave of decadent release rolled through her. Her muscles contracted and gripped him tight in her heat. He gave one final stroke, and a long, deep groan rumbled from his chest. Beneath her fingers, his body shuddered and turned hard as granite. His heartbeat pounded against her ribs. As she floated back down to earth, she held him in her arms.
He shifted his weight, and she turned her head slightly to look at the shining object on the floor that caught her eye. His deputy star.
Something deep in her heart reached out and grabbed hold of that which she had always imagined impossible.
Love.
Like a foolish girl, she looked at that star and wished she could stay right there in his arms forever.
James woke to a room full of bright sunlight and the sensation of soft kisses trailing down his spine. He rolled to his back, pulled Kelly into his arms, and tucked her head against his shoulder. He liked having her there, soft and warm against him. He knew eventually she’d go back to Chicago. When she did, he would miss her. The loss of her would steal his breath. He’d never felt this way about a woman before—one moment fierce with longing and desperation, the next content and optimistic. If he wasn’t careful he’d very likely fall in love with her.
And that would be a mistake.
For both of them.
“I like your tattoo,” she said, smiling up at him.
He chuckled. “It helps cover the scar. And I figured since I almost died, I deserved a pair of wings.”
“Mmmm, and nice wings they are.” She laid her hand on his chest and ran her fingers through the fine hair in a slow, hypnotic motion. “And as much as I love that you showed up at my door last night, I have to ask why you were out in uniform? You didn’t tell me you had to work.”
“Mac Gibbons’s wife went into labor. He called and asked if I could cover the end of his shift for him.”
“Well, that was nice of you.”
“Nah.” He glided his hand down her smooth back. “He would have done it for me.”
“What about Alex?”
“Got him a babysitter.”
“He’s almost eighteen. Isn’t he old enough to stay by himself?”
“Yeah. And he was sound asleep when I left. But these days I just . . .” Don’t trust him.
“You don’t owe me an explanation,” she said.
“I know.” He covered her hand with his own. “And believe me, I’d love to share but . . .”
“You do know its okay to lean on someone else once in a while, right? You don’t have to do it all alone.”
That would be nice. But he’d been handling things by himself for so long he wouldn’t even know how to lean.
She kissed him. Just a soft press of her lips that meant everything to him. She meant everything.
“Lean on me,” she said.
He knew she meant it. He just didn’t know if it was possible. He trusted her, but Alex wasn’t her problem. She had enough going on in her life. She didn’t need his pile of shit, too.
“Thank you,” he told her. “It’s just that everything with Alex is so complicated, it’s hard to explain.”
“I get what you mean. Some things are just difficult.” She nodded and her silky hair slid lusciously against his skin. “Like the deal with my mom popping up all over the place.”
“Your mom?” He lifted his head. “What do you mean?”
Her eyes widened as if she’d spilled a big secret and gotten caught.
“I meant to say the memories of my mom.”
Her explanation was believable, but the hitch in her voice said there was more. “Is there something you want to tell me?”
She blinked. “No.”
“You sure?”
“Of course.”
“Because I’d understand.”
Blink. “Nothing to understand.”
“You sure?”
“You already said that.”
“I know. It’s just that Matt says once in a while he catches Kate talking to your mom.”
Blink. Blink. “He does?”
And why didn’t she sound surprised at that? He had a feeling all the blinking she was doing was a cover up for when she fibbed. He’d have to make a note of that.
“Mmm hmmm. He said before they got married she’d go out and sit in the Buick and he’d see her talking like she was having a conversation.”
“Well, Kate’s kind of odd like that.”
He laughed. “Kate is a lot of things, but I’m not sure odd is one of them.” He smoothed his hand over her shoulder. Matt hadn’t been the only one to mention seeing their better half sitting in the Buick talking to no one. Emma had mentioned it about Dean as well. So either their family had taken a stroll down Cuckoo Lane or something otherworldly was going on.
He’d never mentioned his beliefs regarding life-after-death to anyone before, but he had some strong opinions. When he’d been laid out on that pavement more dead than alive, he’d had an experience that pretty much made him a believer. One he was sure he could sell to the National Enquirer if he felt the need to become Fruitcake of the Year.
“You know you can talk to me if you need to.”
“No.” She looked up at him while her top teeth worried her bottom lip. Blink. “I’m okay.”
A wave of protectiveness washed over him, and he kissed the top of her head. He’d protect her. Just as he’d protect Alex, or his mom, or even those silly little dogs he’d come to love so much. After all, he’d been brought back to life for a reason. Watching over those he loved must be it.
Loved?
His gaze swept over the woman in his arms, and his heart went all crazy in his chest. He knew it was too much to ask, but was it so wrong to just want someone really special in his life? Someone who knew his past and didn’t care? Someone who knew all his burdens and was willing to share the load? Someone who would just love him for who he was? Faults and all?
“I’m here if you need me,” he said.
Kelly looked up at him with her big green eyes and settled her warm hand over his heart. Then, as if she’d read his mind, she said, “And I’m here if you need me.”
Darned if his heart didn’t start going all crazy again.
Scrambled eggs had never tasted so good. It didn’t matter that they were a bit overcooked because her attention had been deliciously distracted while she stirred the mix in the pan, or that she’d over-salted them. Kelly had this amazing hum vibrating through her body as she sat at her brother’s kitchen table across from James, sharing breakfast and coffee as if it was the most normal thing in the world. She was sure he’d shared many a morning-after meal with his dates. But it was new for her. In fact, it was a first.
She could imagine sitting across the table
from him every morning. Sharing in the every day events that made up couples’ lives. Snuggling together at night and holding each other until another day rolled around. She could picture holidays and picnics and such simple pleasures as cozying up on the sofa to watch a movie.
She could picture just being with him. Period.
She sipped her coffee and gazed out the window to the spectacular view of the vibrant meadow and the glimmering lake. The sky was a cloudless blue. Typical for a Montana summer. He was right, it was easy to forget the beauty of nature. Especially when you were knee-deep in concrete and chaos.
The touch of a warm hand on her cheek broke her thoughts.
“I’d offer you a penny, but those look like more expensive thoughts.”
Kelly shifted her gaze to James, an equally amazing sight with his hair tousled from making love, and his chest bare and tan. Her gaze slipped down his broad shoulder to his muscled bicep. Mmmm. She did love that tattoo. It said something about the man he was—a bit wild, yet steeped in tradition.
“I was just thinking how amazing it would be to wake up and look at this beautiful view every morning.”
“Definitely beautiful.” He was looking at her when he said it.
“I’m talking about the scenery.”
“I am, too.” He chuckled as he speared his eggs with the fork. “Oh. That scenery. Don’t forget all that will turn into snow and ice.”
She rested her chin on her fist. “I know. But there’s a beauty in that, too. And hey, aren’t you the one who’s been selling how beautiful this area is?”
“Absolutely.” He stretched his long arm across the table and covered her hand with his, stroking his thumb over the top. “I’d love to show you the area from a snowmobile.”
She shuddered. “Sounds cold.”
He gave her a slow, sexy smile. “I know a great way to warm up.”
She laughed, then stood and reached for his empty plate. He caught her wrist, and she ended up on his lap. He slid his hand into her hair and brought her mouth down to his for a kiss.
“Don’t you have to go to work?” she murmured against his lips.
“I’ve got time.” He kissed her again. “I’ve always got time. For you.”
True to his word, he gave her time. And a lot more.
Mid-day, the parking lot at Mercy Hospital bustled with cars. Whether they belonged to staff or those visiting patients, Kelly didn’t know. She only thought of the smiles she and the clown group had brought the other day to those inside. This morning after James had gone to work she was filled with energy. She thought of going for a run. Or going in to the bakery. But something bigger called to her, and she’d ended up here.
She parked the Buick in the last row and looked in the rearview mirror to check her makeup. She raised her accented eyebrows. Wiggled her pink dotted nose. Grinned with her kewpie-doll smile. She gave a tap to the brim of her purple top hat and checked the position of the big red rose perched near the orange satin band. She gave her bell necklace a jingle and laughed.
Everything looked in place.
All she needed now was for Sprinkles to appear.
Kelly inhaled a slow, steady breath. She closed her eyes and channeled her alter ego—her hidden talent. Since she’d made love in a bakery and jumped into a lake naked, conjuring up her silly side wasn’t as difficult now as the first time she’d tried.
Laughter was the name of the game. And if she couldn’t laugh at herself, no one else could either.
Inside the hospital, she was greeted enthusiastically by the staff and those in the waiting room, where she paused to give a toddler a tweak on the nose and a balloon dog. Okay, so maybe thus far she’d only become proficient at balloon canines, but by the end of summer she intended to graduate to giraffes and mice, too. A happy goal that, at the moment, seemed far superior to sticking her nose back into stacks of folders and files and dealing with mean people. She liked who she’d become in the past weeks, and she was excited to discover even more about herself.
Today the possibilities seemed endless.
With a little hop and a skip, she made her way toward the second floor, where the younger patients were clustered. She paid a visit to Andrea, an eight year old with an antibiotic-resistant skin infection. Then she discovered a little boy named Donovan, who had a nasty upper-respiratory infection. While she made her rounds, she even took time to read get well cards to a few in the senior citizen crowd. Finally she came upon the little girl with golden curls and a bright smile she’d met the other night.
Charity was her name. And Kelly’s heart broke when she found out just how sick this angel of a girl really was. Today Charity was awake and ready for company. So Kelly, sans the rest of the clown clan, knew she had to put on a really big show all by herself. Her first solo act.
She gave the parents sitting bedside a smile as she danced her way into the room, did a few simple tricks with scarves and a big yellow daisy. Her reward? A big two-front-teeth-missing smile. As Kelly wrapped up her rookie routine, Charity crooked her tiny finger. Kelly went to the bedside.
Charity crooked her finger again. “Closer,” she whispered.
Kelly leaned down close, as if Charity wanted to tell her a secret.
“I love you, Sprinkles.” Charity placed a sweet little kiss on Kelly’s cheek. At the same time Kelly fought back tears, her heart burst with a mix of happy and sad. In that ripple of emotion, Kelly realized things about herself she’d never paid attention to before. Somehow she always managed to find strength when she seemed at her weakest moments. She found love and forgiveness in a heart she thought had grown dark and cold. She found a hidden talent that she’d never have known she possessed if one man hadn’t suggested she look for it. And she found that giving someone hope was perhaps the most powerful gift she could share.
She’d never have found any of these things had she not come back home.
“Will you read me a story?” Charity asked, giving the mattress a pat with her small hand.
Kelly glanced at the parents, who gave her a nod. Then she looked down at the numerous tubes and IVs, worrying about where she could sit without dislodging something vital.
“It’s okay, Sprinkles. They don’t hurt.” Charity handed her a book. “This is my favorite.”
“Where the Wild Things Are,” Kelly said in her Sprinkles voice. “It’s my favorite, too.” She proceeded to read about King Max, while Charity listened intently. Kelly imagined she’d heard this story many times, but judging by her rapt attention, it was indeed a very special story. When she finished the very last page, she closed the book and noticed that Charity’s big blue eyes were looking rather sleepy. Best she make an exit so the little girl could get some rest. But when she moved to rise from her place on the mattress, Charity touched her hand.
“Do you know why I like that story?”
Kelly shook her head. “Tell me.”
“Because Max tames the wild things, and then he gets to go home. That’s what I want to do, Sprinkles. I want to go home.”
Kelly looked to the parents, who seemed to be fighting for the courage not to cry. The father gave Kelly an almost invisible shrug.
They didn’t know if their beautiful little girl would ever come home.
Kelly inhaled a steadying breath, and she fought for courage much harder than she’d ever fought in any courtroom. She needed to find the strength not to break down and cry for this tiny little girl who wanted something so simple.
To go home.
“Soon, little one.” She gently brushed the curls away from Charity’s forehead. “Soon.”
“Will you hold my hand until I fall asleep?”
Kelly took Charity’s small hand in her own and lightly stroked her chilled little fingers. “Absotively.”
Charity smiled and closed her eyes. “Come back tomorrow?”
Kelly kissed the tiny fingers. “Absotively.”
She didn’t move until she was certain that Charity was asleep, then she ge
ntly untwined their fingers.
The mother, an attractive woman not much older than Kelly herself, followed her out into the hallway. She reached for Kelly’s hand and held it. Her hand trembled. “I don’t know how to thank you for coming here today.”
“I hope I helped brighten her day just a little.”
The mother nodded. “Six months ago, she was happy and healthy. Today, we don’t know . . .”
Kelly couldn’t help herself; she gathered Charity’s mother in a hug. “If there’s ever anything I can do, just call the Sugar Shack and I’ll be right here.”
As they parted and Kelly walked down the hall toward the elevator, her steps were a little slower and a lot less silly. This would take some getting used to, if that was even possible. At the end of the day, she knew she was exactly where she was supposed to be at exactly the right time.
All it had taken was the simple request from one gorgeous man with a huge heart to challenge her to make others smile.
Without even trying, James Harley had made her a better person than she could have ever imagined. She knew he struggled with demons of his own. She just hoped somehow she could return the favor.
A hot breeze blew off the mountaintops as Kelly strolled toward the Buick at the back of the parking lot. If anyone saw a clown driving her mother’s car she’d have some explaining to do, and she wasn’t quite ready to let the world in on her little secret. She was just discovering who she was deep inside, beyond the Brooks Brothers suit and the thick lawyer’s skin. And maybe, just maybe beyond the exterior that had taken years to form, she was really just a big soft marshmallow.
She opened the door and slid onto the seat. Instead of shoving the keys in the ignition, she sat there for a moment and gathered her thoughts. So much had come to light in such a short time. She felt things she’d never felt before. Things that made her smile. Things that made her heart hurt. And things that made her hopeful beyond reason.
She fanned herself with her jingle beads then leaned forward and turned the key in the ignition. She cranked up the air conditioner that no longer worked, just so she could try to imagine herself in cool air, and reached for the volume knob on the radio.