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Room Mates_The Series

Page 45

by Kendall Ryan


  As much as the whole coordinated attack in Max’s office hurt, he was right. I had lied to him the day we met, and by not coming clean over the past month, I’d in effect lied to him every day since. But, damn him, he’d broken my heart today.

  I could still picture the cold anger on his face as he told me to leave. Could still see the faint grin stretching Tiffany’s lips.

  “What a bitch.”

  There was no question I’d brought this on myself, but she’d made it a million times worse. And what made it even worse than that? The fact that I’d actually gone to Max’s office today to tell him the truth and admit that I was madly in love with him.

  Fresh tears slipped down my face as I turned away from the mirror and continued stuffing my toiletries into my suitcase.

  I thought it had hurt when Greg and I had broken up, but compared to how I was feeling right now, facing the rest of my life without Max? That was like a paper cut. Now my heart felt like it had been stomped on by a herd of buffalo, and there wasn’t shit I could do about it.

  “Hey.”

  Max’s voice jarred me from my thoughts, and I let out a gasp.

  “I didn’t hear you come in. Sorry, I’ll be out of your way in a few minutes.”

  He glanced at the suitcase that was already stuffed with clothes, and his mouth settled into a grim line. “So you’re leaving?”

  I froze, staring at him like he’d lost his mind. “Of course. You and Devil Wears Prada basically fired me back there. What else would I be doing?”

  I wanted to throw myself at his feet and beg him to forgive me. To tell him that I never meant to deceive him. I’d been in a desperate place and knew I was capable of taking care of Dylan, but what was the point? He’d already proven back at the office that he didn’t want to hear my excuses.

  “I can’t imagine this house without you anymore,” he said simply. “And Dylan would be lost without you.”

  I refused to let those words give me even a glimmer of hope. The fact that his daughter loved me didn’t change anything. “I wanted to talk to you about that. I know this is weird, but I’d like to be able to still spend time with Dylan once I leave. Maybe not right away, but in a few weeks, once a little time has passed.” And I can stop crying for more than three consecutive minutes. “I’d like to be able to come take her to the park or something. I realize you probably don’t trust me anymore, but at least think about it. She’s lost enough, Max.”

  His eyes looked wild as he stepped closer and took my hands, using them to lead me out of the bathroom and into my bedroom.

  “I can’t concentrate on anything watching you pack that suitcase,” he admitted with a low growl. “It’s making me want to puke. And I also don’t want you to come and take Dylan to the park once in a while.”

  I should have expected that, but it still felt like another blow to the solar plexus. “Please, Max . . .”

  “No, Addison. It’s me who should be pleading with you. I don’t want you to leave at all. Stay. I was so wrong to handle things the way I did back there. All I can say in my defense is that I was shocked. Tiffany had literally just given me the news, and you walked in a few seconds later. If I’d had even ten minutes to let it settle in, I’d like to believe I would’ve handled it all very differently.”

  “So you’re saying you want me to stay and continue being Dylan’s nanny?” Joy and sadness melded together in a nauseating brew, and I swallowed hard. Could I do that? Could I stay here in this house and not be with Max?

  “No,” he said, running the tip of his thumb over the pulse in my wrist. “I want you to stay, but not as Dylan’s nanny.”

  I was still trying to catch his meaning when he dropped to one knee and gazed up at me, his beautiful eyes blazing. “I want you to stay as my fiancée.”

  The world spun, my heart stuttering as I looked down at him in disbelief. “Are you for real right now?”

  He gave me a sad smile and nodded. “I am. You gave Dylan your love, you gave us your time, you shared yourself with me, and after your past, I know that took courage. If you can’t forgive me for the way I treated you back there, I understand, but I realized something today. I fucking love you. If I didn’t, knowing that you lied to me wouldn’t have felt the way it did.”

  Shame hit me almost as hard as his declaration of love. Was this really happening? “Max, I—”

  “Let me finish. I should’ve thought about how much you’ve proven yourself to us, and how much I do truly trust you. So, here’s my take on what happened. You were fully able to care for Dylan and knew graduating was just a formality. Then, the further things went, the more afraid you were to tell me.” He frowned, his dark brows knitting together. “I don’t like that you felt like you couldn’t be honest with me, but then I realized that’s partially on me. I should’ve made you feel secure. Told you how much Dylan and I both care for you and need you. Then you would’ve felt safe telling me, and you’d have known that something like that could never tear us apart.”

  He lifted his hands to rest on my hips and squeezed. “So put me out of my misery and tell me that you love me too. Tell me that we can put this in the past and move forward as a couple. Marry me, Addison. Please. We can raise Dylan together; you can go back to school if you want to. Whatever makes you happy. Just don’t go.”

  My mouth was bone dry as I tried to get the words out. I went to speak, but a wail broke out in the next room.

  Dylan.

  “Shit,” Max muttered with a wry laugh as he stood. “I put her in the crib with some toys so we could talk, but she’s clearly done with them now. I know today has been crazy, so I want you to think about it. Just promise me you won’t go.”

  I nodded. “Okay. Yeah, I’ll unpack.” I watched him leave, adrenaline from the roller coaster of the past few hours coursing through my veins.

  As thrilled as I was that he’d said the L-word, I couldn’t help but wonder if it had been a knee-jerk reaction to almost losing me. What happened if I went all in with him again emotionally and said yes, only to have him change his mind tomorrow? I’d done that. Gave Greg everything and more, and when he decided to pull the rug out from under me, I was left with nothing. I needed to be sure. Needed to be sure Max was sure.

  He had offered me some time, so I would take it. I knew what I wanted. Max and Dylan, forever and ever. It was Max I wasn’t so sure of, and the risk I was subjecting myself to scared the hell out of me.

  I said a little prayer under my breath and set my suitcase back on the bed.

  Please, God, let this be real. I don’t think my heart could take it if it’s not.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Max

  Don’t pressure her.

  I stood in front of Dylan’s door three hours after my proposal, crippled with indecision. Through dinner, bath time, and even a glass of wine, Addison hadn’t said a word about it.

  After the debacle at my office earlier in the day, I’d spent the rest of that afternoon kicking myself for being so hard on her. Especially in light of the way she’d embraced Dylan. She was as in love with my daughter as I was, and it showed in everything she did. Who cared about a few college credits?

  Once I’d gotten over the initial surprise and realized I might lose Addison, it had become so clear to me that I wanted her in my life permanently.

  But my “will you marry me” had been met with stunned silence. Not what I’d been hoping for at all. I could only hope that once she had a little time to think, she’d see how awesome it would be. The three of us together, like a real family. Who knew? Maybe it could even be the four of us someday . . . or the five of us.

  That thought lessened the tightness in my chest a little.

  I stood by Dylan’s bedroom door and pressed an ear to it, slumping with relief at the sound of silence. She’d been fussy for most of the day at my office and had missed her nap, so I’d put her down early. The first fifteen minutes had been hell as she’d wailed and whimpered, even calling us by nam
e.

  “Dadaaaaa . . . Assinnnn!”

  I’d sat outside the door in the hallway the whole time, wrestling with myself over whether to go in and get her, but Addison had been firm, saying that we should give her a chance to learn to comfort herself. Of course, she said that right before her eyes started to water and she ran away to hide in the kitchen.

  I grinned in spite of myself. She really did love Dylan and would be thrilled to know that the wailing had stopped.

  I rose on stiff legs and made my way quietly downstairs.

  “She’s out,” I murmured to Addison, who sat at the kitchen table with a mug of tea before her.

  Her shoulders slumped and she groaned. “Thank God. I can’t stand to hear her cry like that. It kills me.”

  I stepped up behind her and laid my hands on her shoulders, digging my thumbs into her tense muscles. She hummed and let her head fall forward.

  “That feels really good.”

  My pulse kicked up as I continued the massage. We’d both been in the house sort of drifting past each other all evening, lost in our own thoughts. Me worrying about whether she would say yes, and her, who knew? Maybe wondering whether she wanted to get saddled with a guy who’d never had a real relationship before and came with a lot of baggage?

  Fuck, I didn’t want to pressure her, but I wasn’t even sure if I should be looking for a ring at this point. Maybe she was going to pipe up and tell me she didn’t want to be with me at all.

  I hated the uncertainty.

  She reached back and squeezed my wrists gently, stopping me. Then she stood and turned to face me.

  “Since the baby is asleep, maybe you and I should hit the sack a little early too,” she said, not meeting my gaze.

  “Together?” I asked, hoping like hell she meant what I thought she did.

  She nodded and wet her lips. “If you want to.”

  Oh, I wanted to. But I didn’t bother with words. I just bent and swept her into my arms. She let out a low squeal and then slapped one hand over her mouth as we froze.

  Silence greeted us, and I chuckled. “You almost woke the kraken,” I whispered, carrying her past Dylan’s closed door to my bedroom. I crossed the room to the bed and laid her gently down on the mattress. A devious thought tickled the edge of my brain, and I shot her a lethal grin. “Which gives me a great idea for a little game.”

  “Is it called ‘Release the Kraken’? Because I think we’ve played that a few times already,” she deadpanned.

  The last of the awkward tension between us faded as we both laughed softly.

  “Nope. It’s called ‘How Quietly Can You Come?’”

  She made her lips into an o and her eyes went wide. “Sounds intriguing. How do we play?”

  “Well,” I said, my blood starting to heat as the game formulated in my mind. “You don’t play. You lay back quietly while I do unspeakable things to your body to try to make you scream. The tricky part is if you wake up Dylan, the game is over.”

  Her eyes flashed and her nipples peaked beneath her thin T-shirt. “So how do I win?”

  “You win by letting me make you come over and over again, and staying quiet enough that we can keep going.” I yanked my shirt over my head and dropped it on the floor before reaching for my belt buckle. “What do you say, Addison? You want to play with me?”

  Her gaze flicked below my waist, and I didn’t need to look down to know that my cock was already as stiff as fuck and clearly outlined through the denim. This had seemed like a great idea when I’d first thought of it, but now I wondered how the hell I was going to keep quiet when I already wanted to howl like a fucking animal at the thought of being buried inside her again.

  “Yeah,” she whispered, reaching out a hand to trace my shaft through my jeans. “Yeah, I wanna play.”

  I unbuckled my belt and unfastened my jeans, stripping them off in one motion. The boxers were next but I left them on, needing something between us, no matter how flimsy. As wild as I felt, I didn’t trust myself not to abandon the game before it even got started.

  “Your body is like a statue,” she whispered, her gaze trailing over me, leaving a path of fire in its wake. “Hard and gorgeous.”

  Her hands drifted down her own body, her fingers busily working the leggings she was wearing down her thighs. When she was done, she was completely bare from the waist down, and I groaned as I caught sight of the thin swatch of hair that led to her pussy. Her long, toned legs still held on to a kiss of late-summer sun, and I imagined them wrapped around my neck.

  “Fuck, you look so good, Addison.”

  She settled back against the pillow and gave me a shy smile. “What now?”

  That was a great question. Especially when I wanted to do so many things.

  “First things first. In order to keep things fair and to make sure you let me do my work undisturbed, I’m going to have to restrain your hands.”

  Her eyes went wide and her pupils dilated. “Restrain me? Are you sure that’s necessary?”

  “Nope,” I said, shaking my head. “Not at all, but when you decide to create a game, you can make up the rules. I’m in charge this time.”

  I bent to slide my belt from its loops and then stood, gripping the leather in my hands. “Scoot down,” I instructed, my voice already gritty at the thought of what was to come next.

  For a second, I wondered if Addison was going to back out. The way that pulse in her neck was beating, there was no question she was interested, but being restrained required a level of trust I wasn’t sure I’d earned yet. Especially after the way I’d treated her that afternoon.

  My blood sang when she slowly scooted down and lifted her arms over her head without prompting. “Like this?”

  The move hitched her little T-shirt high, baring her flat stomach and just a glimpse of the underside of both breasts.

  Nice.

  “Yup,” I said, setting one knee on the bed as I looped the brown leather around her wrists. It took almost a minute to get them bound tight and to fasten the belt to the slatted headboard.

  I leaned back to admire my handiwork with a growl. “This is a fucking wet dream come true,” I admitted, staring down at her, drinking in every inch of her with my gaze. I straightened and made my way to the foot of the bed, every nerve ending alive with anticipation.

  Goose bumps rose on her legs as I gripped her ankles and slowly slid them apart. “Remember the rules, Addison. Quiet, or it’s game over.”

  She nodded, her eyes hot with desire as I settled between her thighs. Her pussy was already slick for me, the pink flesh gleaming in the soft light, and I trailed a single finger over her in the lightest of touches. She stiffened and let out a tiny puff of air.

  “That’s good,” I murmured, nodding. “So quiet, love.” I traced gentle circles against her heated flesh, barely grazing the skin but moving closer to her clit with each pass. Minutes passed as I blew against her gently, treating her skin like a watercolor canvas. When I finally passed over her clit with my thumb, she groaned and then bit her lip.

  “Perfect,” I muttered, wanting nothing more than to dive in and eat her alive, but knowing I had to resist. I repeated the touch over and over, barely grazing the bud of nerves, watching as her muscles tensed and trembled.

  “Max,” she whispered, arching closer. “Harder. Please touch me harder.”

  I wanted to. Lord, did I want to, but for the next hour, I managed to resist in an effort to wring every moan, every groan, every sigh from Addison’s body.

  By the time I finally slid my cock deep, she’d come four times and was primed for another orgasm. I was so far gone, it took no time at all for me to join her as she tightened around me. I exploded inside her, her name a hoarse groan ripped from my lips.

  The sounds of our harsh breathing filled the room as the roaring in my ears finally quieted a few minutes later. My bones were like liquid as I rose to my knees and gently unfastened the belt from Addison’s wrists. Red marks blazed her golden skin, and I
bent to kiss each one.

  “Did I hurt you?” I asked, running my thumb over the offending marks.

  “No,” she said with a breathless snort. “I almost hurt me, though. I couldn’t stay still at the end there, and think I nearly tore the headboard off.” She brought her arms down and curled them around me, pulling me against her for a quick kiss. “The marks are nothing. They’ll be faded by tomorrow and totally worth it.”

  “In that case, maybe we should plan a weekly game night.” My blood was already heating up again at the thought, but her bright smile flickered for just an instant.

  “Okay, but next time, I get to make up the rules.”

  As long as she was still here with me, I could live with that. I stretched onto my back and she curled against my side, fitting her body to mine like a puzzle piece. My whole life, I’d never known I could love another person this completely. Suddenly, in a matter of less than two months, I’d found two people who had become integral to my happiness . . . vital to making my world right.

  Addison shifted closer, wrapping one leg around my hip as she drifted off to sleep. I made a mental vow to do everything in my power to erase the last of her doubts and make sure this was how I went to sleep every night. With her by my side.

  Because anything less would be half of a life.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Addison

  Light streamed in, and I let my eyes flutter open with a sigh.

  I’d been in the middle of the best dream. Max and Dylan and I were at the beach making a sand castle together. It was a beautiful breezy day, and I felt the most perfect sense of calm.

  Now, in the harsh light of day, that sense of calm was fading fast. I peeked to my left to see the other side of the bed empty, save for a note on the pillow.

  I rolled over and breathed in the scent of Max’s pillow as I snagged the note and unfolded it. My lips split into a grin at the sloppy writing.

  It’s a beautiful morning and we were starving so we walked over to the bakery to get chocolate croissants. Daddy said you looked too pretty to wake up, but we’re gonna bring you one back, so don’t eat.

 

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