Twisted Honor (Deep Six Security Series, #2)

by Becky McGraw

  Namely him in this case. His fingers rubbed the ridge on the welt, and fear shot through him as he realized exactly how close she’d come to his balls.

  Taylor stared at him a moment more as if trying to determine if he was telling the truth. Suddenly, he heard her gag and a shiver shook her as she bent down to grab her clothes. When she stood again, her face was a horrified mask.

  “Oh my, God. I’m so sorry...so embarrassed,” she muttered, as she turned and dashed for the bathroom with the clothes clutched to her chest.

  It looked like he wasn’t the only one with some issues that a little therapy would help, Slade thought, as he crawled out of the bed to go find her. What he’d really like to do is find that bastard who’d fucked her head up so badly about sex, handcuff him to the bed and give him more than a little pain.

  Taylor wasn’t a kid though, he’d guess she was in her late twenties, and she was obviously very experienced at sex, so what puzzled him more is why she believed whatever she’d been told.

  Hadn’t she ever had normal sex before?

  It just didn’t make sense to him.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  Taylor was mortified, as she leaned against the vanity in the bathroom, refusing to look at herself in the mirror. How could she have been so stupid?

  Just because Mark, and his best friend Matt before him, told her that the strange things they asked her to do to them, the odder things they’d done to her in bed, were what good sex was all about, she’d believed them. Just like she’d believed Mark loved her until the night he tried to kill her with his crazy games and blamed it on a PTSD episode.

  Now that she’d seen a real episode firsthand with Slade, she knew Mark had been faking it to cover his abuse—the spankings he said would relieve his stress, the domination he said would help him get control of his demons, which lasted even when they weren’t having sex.

  The days when she was off work and he was visiting her, as Taylor called it that now because she knew he had a wife, a home and a child, when he demanded she walk around naked all day for him to fuck at will in whatever orifice pleased him. The toys, which were pretty close to torture devices that he used on her to get his jollies, the same toys he demanded she use on him when she cuffed him to the bed and beat his ass.

  Toward the end, that was the only time she really enjoyed sex with him, because she got a little payback for what he dealt to her. Dealing him pain had definitely been her pleasure then.

  Taylor hadn’t questioned it—and they’d pushed the limits because they knew she wouldn’t. Matt had found a naïve virgin and trained her gently to accept, even like sometimes, what he did to her, so she didn’t know any better. He pretended to care about her to convince her that they had a normal relationship. That what he did to her, what he had her to do to him in the bedroom was normal. When he got tired of her, he passed her off to Mark, a much more depraved man, and probably gave him a playbook which he expanded.

  Her chin dropped lower to her chest, and she groaned. “How in the hell could I have been so stupid?”

  And because she was so stupid, and evidently a degenerate herself, she’d believed Slade would like the same things they had when she found the handcuffs in his closet. From the look on his face and his anger, that definitely was not the case. He’d enjoyed some of it, but thought she was a freak. Sickness boiled in her stomach, as she wondered how in the hell she’d ever face him again.

  The door knob rattled, and she gasped as it flew inward and he filled it with his naked body. His green eyes met hers, and they were full of confusion, sympathy and hot anger as he shut the door, and leaned on it.

  “I think we need to talk, little bit,” he said gruffly. “Tell me what that bastard did to you.”

  Taylor swung her eyes back down to the vanity. “I can’t,” she replied, her voice barely above a whisper. “You’d think I was an idiot.”

  Slade pushed off of the door, and she saw his muscular calves as he stopped beside her. His big hands dropped on her shoulders and he turned her to face him, then tipped her chin up so she had to look at him. “No, I’d think that you are a beautiful, but naïve, woman who was conned and probably abused by a slick sonofabitch with no morals or respect for women.”

  “Slick sonofabitches,” she corrected, her lower lip trembling and her eyes burning as shame washed through her.

  God, if her father was alive and knew he’d probably kill Mark. Slade looked like he might be considering that at the moment too. He’d have to get in line, because Taylor wanted the first shot at him, and she didn’t miss.

  “Who were they?” Slade demanded, his fingers tightening on her shoulder. Taylor tried to drop her chin to get away from the intensity in his eyes, but he held it firm. When she didn’t reply, his face darkened, and he pinched her chin. “Who, Taylor?!”

  “My ex-boyfriend Mark and his best friend Matt,” she admitted, pinching her lips shut.

  “How did you meet them?” Slade’s eyes narrowed, and he stared into her eyes as if he’d find every answer there.

  “I met Matt first at the recruiting office in Oklahoma when I went there the day after I graduated from college. The recruiter said because of my size, I wouldn’t qualify for MP training and I was pretty upset. Matt was there renewing his contract and convinced me he could help me because he was an MP training officer.” Taylor stopped as emotion clogged her throat.

  “More, I want every fucking detail, Taylor,” Slade growled, a white line appearing around his mouth.

  “I took a job with the sheriff’s office, worked my ass off with him at night, and started staying over at his apartment when we finished with PT. One thing led to another, and even though I never got accepted as an MP, we became a...couple.”

  Taylor blew out a breath to fight through the sickness that burned in her throat. A growl rumbled in Slade’s chest and she knew he was going to make her finish.

  “Things were good, Matt got a permanent station at Fort Sill, but then his best friend Mark was transferred there and he introduced us. Mark hit on me constantly, and there was no way that Matt didn’t notice because he did it in front of him too. Matt just didn’t seem to care, even seemed to kind of like it. I took that as a sign it was time for me to move on, my blowup with the sheriff sealed that, so I started looking for a job out of town.”

  “Okay, so you found the hotel job, moved to Dallas—how did Mark get back into your life? Didn’t you think he was an asshole for hitting on you when you were his best friend’s girlfriend?” Slade demanded, his brow puckered.

  Taylor shivered, not wanting to continue, because she knew Slade would really think she was a degenerate. She was one, because at the time she’d liked it. What they’d done that night was a stretch, but not too far from normal for the sex life she and Matt shared. But she couldn’t let Slade think she was a cheater.

  “Oh, I thought he was an asshole at first and avoided him, but when Matt decided he was done with me and all but threw me to him.”

  “So you had sex with Mark, before you moved and he followed you to Dallas?” he asked, and blood scalded Taylor’s face.

  “Sort of,” she said, averting her eyes, even though he still had her chin in his grasp.

  “You don’t sort of have sex, Taylor. What made Mark follow you to Dallas?” A tremor rocked her, and Slade’s body tensed. “Tell me!” he shouted.

  “Mark showed up one night and said he locked himself out of his apartment. Matt was finally showing interest in me again, so I was frustrated when he told Mark he could stay. It was an efficiency apartment and the sofa was small so he got in bed with us and...” I was already tied to the bed and blindfolded. They both took turns fucking me for hours and making me guess which one of them was up to bat, as Mark called it. They gave me an orgasm if I got it right. Before they untied me, they fucked me at the same time and it hurt some, but not bad enough that I didn’t like that too. Yes, I’m a freak, and so ashamed for not being smart enough to realize they were turning me
into one.

  Slade’s hands fell away, and Taylor’s eyes flew up to see his face was ashen. He looked disgusted, and she had to get away from that look. “If my car’s not trashed, I’ll be out of here in a few minutes,” she said, her body shaking violently as she scooped up her clothes from the counter. “If it is, I’ll walk to town and call a cab.”

  “So after that you invited the bastard to move in with you in Dallas?” he asked incredulously.

  “No—that’s not what happened! I didn’t invite him anywhere. He just showed up one day at my house saying he was in town for a training,” she shouted back, turning to face him. “He took me out to dinner, and we just talked that first time. The next time he came back was the same...”

  “But the third time was a charm, eh?” Slade guessed, his breathing shallow, his nostrils flared and his fists clenched at his sides, as the dark flush on his face nearly covered his shoulders.

  “Yeah, he came back every time he was on leave, left clothes there and even got mail at the house. He called me every night, came home—um, visited my house—every two or three weeks for a few days. Longer when he got vacations. He said he was living with me.”

  “For how long?” Slade asked, his voice a smidge calmer.

  “Three years.”

  “What happened to make you finally break up with him?” he asked, the anger in his tone escalating again.

  Hysterical laughter bubbled in her chest as the thought hit her that she was standing here buck naked telling this man, her new boss at her shiny new job, who was standing before her naked too, things she’d never told another soul. She’d told him everything else, so why not finish it? He certainly couldn’t think any worse of her.

  “He almost choked me to death one night during sex, and it scared me. Told me it was a PTSD episode afterwards, like he’d done for a while when he got too rough. I researched EMDR trying to help him and myself, because I really did care about him. But then his wife had divorce papers delivered to my house six months ago, and I kicked him out.” When Taylor finished, it felt like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

  “I want to know who these motherfuckers are because I have connections with the Army. They were both Army right?” he demanded, and her blood froze.

  All she needed was Slade to create drama by confronting them or calling their superiors. That would mean she would be dragged in the middle of an investigation to testify, then have to repeat the process in court. Taylor was embarrassed enough without recounting the depths of their sordid sex games in public, and she wasn’t sure there was anything that could be done about it anyway.

  What happened was entirely her fault. Mark and Matt had duped her, but they hadn’t forced her to do anything. Everything she’d done with them had been consensual.

  Because she was a naïve idiot.

  “I’m not telling you,” Taylor replied, lifting her chin. It’s over and done with and they are out of my life.” She put her hand on his chest. “Just let sleeping dogs lie.”

  With a growl, he pulled her to him and hugged her tightly, which surprised her. His angry words rumbled under the ear pressed to his chest. “Those dogs used a military uniform, an honorable uniform your father wore, to convince you they had honor so they could use and abuse you. The twisted bastards need to be shown what honor is and be punished so they don’t have a chance to do this to anyone else.”

  Taylor shivered in his arms, and her eyes burned again. Was that why she’d been so susceptible to Matt and Mark’s games? Because they wore an Army uniform and that made her trust them? The misery in her gut boiled into anger, and she pushed back from him.

  “They did didn’t they?” Taylor said, looking up at him, her voice stronger as her anger burned brighter.

  “Damn straight they did,” Slade agreed, his eyes like granite as he looked down at her. “And I’m pretty good at figuring things out on my own. You don’t have to tell me where to find them, I’ll find them.” His hand shot out and he grabbed her wrist, and the clothes in her arms tumbled to the floor. “But what I want to do right now, is show you how a real man makes love to a woman.”

  Taylor pulled back, and he stopped to turn and hold her shoulders. “If you don’t feel like it anymore, I understand. I should’ve asked, because that was a major emotional dump you just had. I’m sure you’re pretty raw.”

  “I’m sorry for dumping on you,” she said, looking down. She really was sorry, but he’d pressed and pressed until she spilled it all to him.

  Slade tipped her chin up. “Tell me what you want, little bit,” he said gruffly.

  Her throat worked, and her eyes focused on his lips, as a need for intimacy and emotional contact tugged at her insides. “If making love with a real man includes kissing, then I want you to show me what normal sex is like, please.”

  Slade’s eyes were green fire as he studied her for a minute before he dropped a light, sweet kiss on her mouth and took her hand.

  CHAPTER FOURTEEN

  Leading her to the bed, Slade stopped to cup her face in his palm, and his eyes fixed on her mouth as he stroked his thumb over her bottom lip.

  “Do you like it when I kiss you, Taylor?”

  Taylor remembered the delicious kiss Slade laid on her in the truck and a thrill raced through her. That kiss is why she’d been waiting for him in bed, hoping he’d come to her to finish what he started. That single touching of mouths had created a burning need in her body greater than any she’d ever experienced in her life.

  There was no fear, no pain in that act—just tenderness and incredible need.

  Neither Matt nor Mark thought kissing was a part of having sex, so Taylor had never experienced the intimacy of mouths touching, the silent communication that happened between souls through an exchanging of breath. Slade’s kiss had shown her why she’d never felt really connected with either man during sex, or any other time.

  “Yes, I need you to kiss me,” she whispered against his thumb, and he smiled as his head drifted toward hers.

  His mouth met hers with a moan, their breath mingled and sweet need sprouted in her chest. Taylor’s mouth opened on a sigh and Slade kissed her deeper, held her closer and the delicious tension in her belly grew. His hand skimmed over her waist, to her hip, leaving goosebumps behind on her skin, but when the warmth of his palm settled on her ass, Taylor clenched her cheeks and he jerked his hand back.

  “Did I hurt you?” he asked, his eyes dark with concern.

  “No, just habit,” she replied, sliding her hand down his arm to take his hand and put it back there. No sex ever started with Mark unless he spanked her until her butt felt raw first. Sometimes it was delivered with his hand, sometimes with a hard wooden paddle that she hid from him, which earned her more licks with it when he found it.

  Taylor got very good at hiding it.

  Slade’s eyes sparked with anger, but cleared as his head bent toward her again, his mouth covered hers and he moaned. He kissed her deeply, feasted on her mouth as his left hand found her other cheek She clenched again, but his fingers dug into her flesh and he lifted her up to her toes. His groan mixed with her whimper as her sensitive, hardened nipples raked up his chest.

  He shifted her weight and suddenly the tip of his rigid cock pressed against the swollen nub at the top of her thighs. He held her there, gyrated his hips against her as he deepened the kiss until she felt like he was inside of her, lifting her spirit up like he had her body. Her breath came in snatches, her head swam, and need clawed at her insides. Throwing her legs around him she pressed down on him, rotated her body with his and a violent tremor rocked through him.

  “We need to get in the bed,” he groaned, sliding his mouth from hers. “I need to be inside of you now.” Breathing hard, he sat on the bed with her on his lap.

  Wanting that badly herself, Taylor scrambled off of his lap and crawled toward the head of the bed. Laying down in the middle of the bed she brought her knees under her to lift her ass high in the air and
felt her insides open. She lifted higher by arching her back as she stretched her hands toward the headboard.

  Her inner muscles and anus pulsed in time with her out-of-control heart as she imagined the incredible friction and burning stretch when his huge cock drove into her.

  The question was which would he choose.

  She whimpered and her ass muscles clenched thinking about him choosing her anus. As big as he was that could hurt badly without lube of some kind. It hurt bad enough when Mark did it and he wasn’t nearly as big. The bed dipped, and she felt Slade crawl up behind her.

  “Please get the baby oil if you want anal,” she begged, flinching when he touched her.

  She heard a choked sound behind her, his hand shook then suddenly she was flipped on the bed and he glared down at her.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, her lip trembling as fear shot through her.

  Taylor didn’t know this man, and right now, he looked mad enough to kill her. She tensed and ticked off possible moves in her mind she could use to get him off of her if necessary. The same way she had when Mark pushed her too far.

  “Sorry for what?” he growled, pulling her to him as he lay down beside her. “I’m going to kill that fucking bastard for doing this to you.”

  “Doing what?” she asked.

  “For doing a complete mind fuck on you where sex is concerned.” His arms loosened, and eased her back onto the mattress. “I want you to close your eyes and relax.”

  Taylor shut her eyes, and huffed out a breath but she still wasn’t relaxed. The thing she hated worst was being blindfolded and not knowing what was coming at her next.

  “I’d rather keep my eyes—oh,” she said, on an indrawn breath as his warm, slightly callused palm glided down her body leaving a trail of fire. His other hand slid under her neck and he drew her closer to his side, before throwing his calf over hers to nudge her knees apart.