Totem

  Ty, I fall into you every time and every time you catch me effortlessly. It is everything else around us that are the hard parts and I am afraid that if I walk away from this just because the road we are on is going to be inevitably rocky, then I will be missing out on the greatest adventure of not just my life but of all time. I would rather spend a few short months wrapped in your arms attempting to make us work and know what it is like being with you than to go a lifetime without knowing you.”

  Warm wet tears stream down my face uncontrollably. My body begins to tremble under the weight of my own words. It is a physical release matching the power of my emotional release. For the first time ever I am opening myself up to another person. The realization of this causes my voice to falter. Through short breaths and forced words I press on.

  “So whatever warning you are trying to tell me. Whatever fear you have about my wellbeing, put it to rest. You are my flame. All the events that happened previously in my life grow dim without you shedding light on my future. With you, my world is bright. In my mind, there is no going back. I can’t erase my memory and to walk away from you now with no closure and knowing that this could be great would be unbearable. So I am yours for as long as you will have me despite whatever that means.”

  I fold my napkin and dab at my eyes before placing it on the table. I stare down at it needing a break from the energy it took to summon the courage to tell Ty everything. I feel him watching me without looking up, but I need a moment alone. I need a moment to compose myself. Finally, I look up into his eyes; his beautiful light brown eyes. What I wouldn’t give to know his thoughts. Maybe I said too much. I feel my heart begin to race.

  “Say something.” I respond to his silence.

  Ty gives me a smile. Quickly he rises from his seat and in one effortless swoop I am in his arms and he is lifting me out of my chair. My heels leave the ground as he holds my weight and his lips kiss mine. Immediately I kiss back wrapping my arms around his neck. My pumps barely skim the ground and I feel my body move through the air. A feel a rush of coolness broken by the fragrant roses scattered around us and I am being pushed up against a cold glass wall. The warmth of Ty pressing on my front contrasts with the coolness behind me. I kiss back harder.

  Every thought, every feeling that I have for Ty, I have just laid on the table. There is no need to hold back anymore. So I kiss Ty. Passionately, I kiss back with every emotion I tried to express and every feeling I will ever have. My mouth searches his mouth sending chills throughout my body and a fire rising with in me and I imagine this is heaven. Ty lifts my body up higher separating our magnetic mouths.

  “Forever.” He says through ragged breaths.

  “What?” I whisper back to him.

  “That’s as long as I will have you… forever.”

  My eyes lock into his and I see fire burning. I have been holding back for so long unsure of how Ty feels perhaps knowing how he feels about me but not knowing what it meant. He is mine and I want him. He lowers me down so I can stand and begins kissing me harder than he has ever kissed me before.

  I answer back. Deeper and deeper the kisses get. Ty’s hands slide down my back and my thigh. He lifts my right leg up wrapping it around him as his kisses become more urgent. I loosen my arms around his neck and slowly move them down his chest. I feel the musculature of his body even through his thick sweater. My hands wonder down further moving slowly over each one of his abs as our mouths franticly search each other’s. As I get more familiar with his lips, I realize I want more. Something deep inside of me cries out as I begin craving more. My roaming hands find Ty’s front belt loops on his pants. My fingers slip through them. Quickly I pull Ty towards me pressing his hips against my hips and tighten my right leg around him wanting, craving and reaching for more. As soon as I do this, the kisses on his end stop. He lets out a low growl. It is not an animal growl, but a guttural sound from a frustrated man. I look up at Ty. In his face is frustration and restraint.

  “What?” I ask with a coy smile.

  Ty adjusts his hands on me. He moves his body slightly away causing my leg to drop. I loosen my hold on his belt loops keeping my fingers resting in them.

  “We just made our relationship official. Maybe we should take it slower.” Ty states through ragged breath.

  I bite my lower lip then pout.

  “I’m sure we could make it a little MORE official.” I reply with a sly smile as I put into words what my body aches for.

  Ty let out another low growl. This time it sounds exactly like an animal.

  “Call me old fashioned, but I want to do this right. I want to savor every moment, remember every little step I take with you. That way it means that much more.”

  I look at Ty. I admire Ty’s valor. He is a gentleman. The truth of the matter is I have the opposite thought. We share very little time together because of his duties and my school schedule. Each moment we have together is precious and I want to do as much as I can as soon as I can.

  “Ok.” I reply in a sullen tone knowing the topic is not one worth fighting for at this very moment.

  This makes Ty laugh. I release Ty’s belt loops, reach around him and grab my glass of wine. I take a big swig finishing off the rest of it. I need something to cool me off.

  “So what else did you have planned for tonight?” I ask turning my attention back to Ty.

  “No plans just dinner and talking.”

  “Well, we better clean up.” I respond. I side step around Ty and grab my plate. Ty turns and wraps his arms around me. Kissing the back of my head, he slides his hand down mine and forces me to sit the plate on the table.

  “You don’t have to clean.” Ty says pulling me into him. The feel of his chest pressed against my back almost makes me regret not arguing to go further. “I can do it.”

  “You cooked dinner. Cooks shouldn’t have to clean up, too.”

  “I insist.” He swipes my hair to one side and kisses my newly exposed neck sending current flowing through my body again. His negotiation skills are excellent.

  “Then what do I do?”

  “You,” begins Ty kissing my neck after each word, “relax and have more wine.”

  He grabs the bottle and fills my wine glass without skipping a kiss.

  “And if I finish the wine?”

  “We have more bottles.” replies Ty as he releases me and begins stacking dishes on the table. I grab my glass and take a sip as I follow him into the kitchen. I settle into a stool at the bar as Ty busily cleans up. Relaxing from the wine, Ty and I make small talk. Fun topics laced with smart comments and small jokes fill the rest of the night. My feet dangle slowly kicking back and forth. No longer do I feel the need to calculate my every thought before I speak. I have already won over Ty. Now, we can just float.

  “Do you know you are the most beautiful the way you are right now?” Ty asks out of nowhere as he loads the dishwasher.

  “What do you mean?” I put up my guard a bit.

  “You always try to be so calculated. Every move and word seemed so well thought out when I first met you.” states Ty. “Right now, you are just rambling. There isn’t a care in the world and your thoughts drift into words. It’s beautiful to me. I definitely love that you think before you speak but now... with no filter… I really see you.”

  My face flushes and it isn’t just from the wine (although it is helping). I smile at the man in front of me.

  “My calculated thoughts come from years of just blurting out what I think and having negative consequences.”

  “Well, it’s a very good quality to have and it amazed me in the beginning. That and how pretty you are.” Ty states with a wink.

  I blush and my heart begins beating faster. Ty smiles at the sound of my heart. Just knowing he can hear the difference makes me all the more vulnerable to him.

  “You hear that, huh?”

  “Super hearing… one of the side effects of being me.”

  Ty reaches over and pours more wine into my gl
ass.

  “You better stop pouring. Otherwise, I won’t be able to drive home.”

  “I can always bring you home.”

  I smile. Here in front of me is a man who genuinely and truly cares about me. He makes me happy and I want to hold on to him for as long as I can.

  After the dishes are clean and the candles blown out, Ty and I settle in front of the television to watch a movie. The plane ride mixed with the wine has taken its toll on me. My eyes get droopy and I drift into a deep sleep within ten minutes. I wake up briefly when I feel Ty lift me from the couch. Effortlessly he draws me to his body and carries me up the stairs. My eyes are heavy and in my dream state all I can do is rely on my other senses to tell my foggy brain what is happening.

  I feel the shift of weight as Ty pushes open the door. My skin feels the soft sheets as he gently lays me down. Then I feel the comforter drape over my body. It feels like feathers slowly caressing my skin. Fingers comb through my hair as Ty removes fallen strands from my face. Then I feel the kisses. Two are placed on each eyelid with the third gently on my lips. My ears hear Ty leaving. I hear his steps on the carpet and the gentle flick of the light switch as the darkness deepens. Any second he will close the door leaving me alone.

  “Ty,” His name is a sleepy whisper off my lips urged forward by a wanting heart.

  “Yes,” responds Ty just as softly.

  “Stay with me.”

  Seconds pass and I begin tumbling down that rabbit hole back into my minds dreamscape. The last feeling I feel before checking out of reality completely is the warmth radiating from Ty’s arms wrapping around me. In that moment, I feel whole.

  Chapter 17: The Legend

  “Are you ready?” Ty asks as he places the car in park.

  I glance in front of me at the little cabins surrounding an open field speckled with trees. My heart is racing. Our relationship has been pushing forward, but this is a completely other step. Outside the door of Ty’s mustang lies not only the introduction to the family, but also to the legend of who he was and is. He knew weeks ago that the elders approved me learning the legend. Ty could no longer keep it a surprise from me. He told me his intentions to bring me here three days ago and I have been worried ever since. This is a first of many occasions. It is the first time I camped out with a boyfriend. It is the first time I ever met a boyfriend’s family, and it is the first time I ever got to learn the secrets of my boyfriend’s mystical powers. This is also something that I never thought I would say. Never in a million years did I ever think I would date someone like this or even that magic existed.

  “Kimber, are you ready?”

  Ty asks the question again as he grabs my hand. I glance at him. The sun is streaming through his back window casting light on his hair. His chocolate eyes stare deep into mine. Warmth fills through my body and I realize right then and there that I am ready. Through our time together, I have associated Ty with warmth and comfort. I have grown to love him. We have not gotten to that level of saying I love you yet, but I am only steps away from shouting it as loud as I can. I truly am ready to take that next step. That means opening the door and stepping out into Ty’s world. I smile at him as I open the passenger door and place my foot on the grass below.

  “You can leave your bag in the car.” says Ty. “I will come back and get it.”

  I glance at the view behind us. The sun is streaming over the water. Cypress trees kiss the banks and tall grasses wisp up in between them. It is the beauty of the Louisiana wetlands at its finest on this late January day. The days have been cold but for one brief weekend the sky has opened up and warmth streams down. Not only is the weather unusually warm a few days before February, but the mosquitoes have long ago stopped wreaking havoc on shady days creating perfect weather. Ty comes to my side and places his hand in the middle of my back. I lean my body against him as I stare into the water.

  “It’s very pretty,” I say to Ty without breaking my gaze on the water in front of me.

  “I can think of other things just as beautiful.” Ty kisses my forehead.

  I look up and smile at him. It’s hard to believe only a few weeks have passed since we became official. Everything between us seems so effortless. He begins to lead me in a direction unknown. As we walk on, I hear laughter and splashing. We walk closer to a fenced in hill, a woman on top of the hill sitting in a chair turns around and looks at us.

  “Ty!” The woman exclaims. The laughter of children gets louder the closer we get. We open the gate and walk up the steps. With each step, the view of the pool comes closer and closer into being. My eyes light up and then grow to confusion. The water in the pool is the color of root beer soda. I have never seen a pool like this before. One of the kids steps out of the water and onto the concrete. Then he jumps back in splashing the light brown liquid everywhere. It is like pouring root beer into a glass except without the bubbles.

  “Hi Liz,” Ty greets the woman sitting in the chair under the umbrella.

  “It’s good to see you Ty!” Liz exclaims showing as much excitement as she did when we walked up.

  “Liz, I would like you to meet Kimber.” Ty pulls me closer. “This is my girlfriend.”

  With a smile, I extend a hand out to shake hers. “It is nice to meet you.”

  “You too,” replies Liz. I look into her eyes. They are the same light brown as Ty’s. Her smile lights up her face and little wrinkles of age crease on the edges of her eyes. Her hair is light brown hanging just above her shoulders.

  “Mom!” One of the kids crawling out of the pool calls out.

  “Yes, dear,” Liz’s attention turns towards the skinny little boy with a big belly.

  “I’m going to do a cannon ball.” announces the little boy. “Watch this!”

  “I’m watching.” Liz replies with a smile.

  With that, the little boy runs and jumps as far into the pool as his little legs can bring him. He hugs his legs tucking his body into a tight ball. His little body makes just as little of a splash. A second later a head pops up with a huge smile.

  “Did you see that, mom?!” Exclaims the little boy.

  “I did. That was bigger than the last one!”

  Pleased with the answer, the little boy gives a proud smile as he swims back over to the rest of the kids.

  “Not much of a splash,” Ty teases.

  “Yes, but if you would have seen the last one, you would have been very impressed by that one.”

  Ty lets out a laugh. I keep a smile on my face as I look around. Across the pool are two sets of tables and chairs. Sitting in one of them with a drink is an old lady. Her hair is raven black like Ty’s except for the front strands which are silver. Her glasses rest gently on the edge of her nose as she messes with the threads in her hands. As if she realizes I am watching, she looks up and meets my eyes. A knowing smile crosses her face. My cheeks get rosy as I return the smile and look back at Ty and Liz.

  “So I have never seen a pool like this.” I state making an attempt at conversation. “What kind of pool is it?”

  “It’s an artesian well pool. There is a natural spring that bubbles up here. We built the pool and use the water from the spring to fill it. It’s completely clear water with no chemicals in it. You can open your eyes underneath without chlorine getting in them.”

  “How do you keep it from getting dirty or filled with bacteria or mosquito larvae?” I ask.

  “We empty the pool every week or two and fill it up again. On top of that, we have a pool ionizer pump that helps clean the water,” replies Liz.

  “I like how it is the color of root beer,” I state.

  “Yes, that comes from the high mineral content of our well. Unfortunately, that’s one of the side effects of a natural spring in Louisiana. The water table is so high here that it’s easier for minerals to get in to it. A positive to that is the kids think they are swimming in pool full of soda. I joke with Sean, my son there and call it a root beer float when he swims.”

  She
points to the little cannon ball creator amongst the other children. The children in the pool hang on to the sides and kick their feet while talking amongst each other. A few of them with pool noodles float in the center. It is an uncommonly beautiful afternoon in January for swimming and the kids seem to be enjoying it.

  “Do you wanna swim?” asks Ty.

  The only time I went swimming here was at an apartment complex’s pool and it felt like jumping into a giant bath tub. It is in complete contrast to the pools up north. I wonder how an artesian pool will feel.

  “Sure,” I say.

  “Awesome,” replies Ty. “I’ll go get our bags out of the car. There are changing rooms in the bath house right there.”

  Ty points to the brick building outside the fence. He gives me a kiss on the cheek before walking towards the car leaving me alone with Liz. Not one for silence, I turn to Liz and make another attempt at conversation. As if reading my mind, Liz begins talking first.

  “So how long have you known Ty?”

  “Not long at all,” I reply. “We first met in soccer and volleyball class. Then we went out a few times and just kind of clicked.”

  That’s if you call him saving my life ‘clicking’. The words stick in my mind.

  “When did you two start dating?”

  “It was probably about a month after meeting,” I reply. “We didn’t get serious until a few weeks ago.”

  “He really likes you,” replies Liz. “I have known Ty all my life and you are the first one…”

  Liz trails off as if she is afraid of saying too much.

  “I am the first one he has brought to hear the legend.” I finish the sentence for her.