The Bucket List

by Skyla Carter

The only light came from the numerous coloured candles in their glass coverings that he'd placed strategically around the room, and from the moonlight drifting through the open windows. Rae looked ethereal in this light, positively stunning. He hoped he could keep his hands off her long enough to show her how much he had to give.

  "I'm glad you like it," he said, sitting down next to her. "So, what do you want to eat? Italian, Chinese? "

  "I'll eat anything, I'm starving," she replied.

  "Room service, then," he said as he reached for the phone. "It'll be quicker."

  When they had placed their orders, he turned to face her. She looked more nervous than him.

  "Relax," he told her. "I don't bite. Not unless you want me to, that is."

  She chuckled a bit and he saw some of her tension ease.

  "So we're really just going to talk, then?" she asked.

  "Among other things," he smiled.

  Among a lot of other things. He was going to make sure she kept coming back.

  "I really enjoyed myself tonight," Alyssa said as John signalled for the bill.

  "So did I," he smiled. "I hope we can do it again soon."

  "I'd love that."

  "You wanna go somewhere else, maybe for a drink? The night is still young," he asked as he put some money on the table.

  "I'm going to have to take a rain check. I'm really tired, Rae wore me out last night. I keep having these images of her screaming at me to get on a barrel," she chuckled.

  "What?"

  "I still have no idea what that was all about," she laughed as John helped her out of her chair.

  "You're coming to their house this weekend for her party, though, aren't you?"

  "Yeah, Corey told me about that. It sounds like it's going to be a lot of fun."

  "Normally they just find a bunch of people they want to sleep with and throw them all in one place, then spend hours indulging themselves. This year Corey's doing something different for her, since she's trying to build a relationship with Nate and an orgy doesn't really fit in with that," he laughed as the doorman hailed a cab for them. "I'm sure, though, that I'll still have to scrape them off the floor before the day is out. Corey's planning on buying that much alcohol."

  "Do you always play their Daddy?"

  "I don't play Daddy at all," John said. "It's not my fault I can handle my drink better so I'm almost always sober when they pass out!"

  "So you're telling me you don't actually go out of your way to make sure they're all right, and tell them off when you think they're doing something wrong?"

  "Well, it's not like they listen to me anyway, you know those two do whatever the hell they want," John said in his defence. "The last time I didn't look out for them they ended up in Vegas doing their best to gamble their life savings away."

  "So you do Daddy them!" Alyssa chuckled. "I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that. I think they're lucky to have you watching out for them. You're a good guy, John."

  "You really think so?"

  "Yeah. But Saturday I want you to loosen up and enjoy yourself."

  "You say that like you think I'm boring," John said.

  "You're anything but. You're funny, you're sweet, you're sensitive and you care about people. It's hard to find all those qualities in a guy," Alyssa said as a taxi stopped in front of them. "All I'm saying is, Saturday I want you to take care of yourself for a change. Do what you want to do. What do you want to do?"

  "If I told you that you might not come," John smiled wickedly.

  "Don't be so sure about that," Alyssa whispered with a naughty smile of her own as she got into the taxi.

  "Are you sure you don't want me to take my clothes off?"

  "I'm sketching your face, Rae" Nate chuckled as his pencil expertly ran over the paper.

  "Yeah, but I could still take my clothes off," Rae smiled wickedly.

  Nate laughed again and caught her eyes. She had such gorgeous blue eyes...

  "Stop trying to sabotage my work."

  "Okay, just a sock then," she said, pulling a sock off one of her feet and wriggling her toes at him.

  She was lying on some cushions on the floor, next to the candle light, where she ended up after their meal and a few beers. Her nervousness had completely disappeared now and Nate had seen a glimpse of what lay inside her. He'd also found out she had a great sense of humour; she laughed easily. The first time that laughter had lit her eyes, he'd been mesmerised. It had humbled him a bit that she could still laugh with all that she was going through; before that morning, all he'd had was a broken heart and he'd felt like death.

  Hours into the night, he'd grabbed his sketch pad. She looked so beautiful, he'd felt he had to.

  "How is taking one sock off going to make you feel any better?" he laughed.

  "I just think that sketch would look a lot better with a bit of flesh."

  "I'm doing your face!" Nate laughed again.

  "If you put just one of my toes on it... scratch that, put my whole foot," she said. "Tell you what; I can take my clothes off."

  Nate put his pencil down and looked at her. He'd done all right, he supposed. Three hours and he hadn't really touched her yet even though he'd been dying to. The sexual tension had been unbearable. It had slowly built up through the night with a single look now and then, a simple brush of his fingers, while they had talked. It had turned out that talking to her was easier than he had imagined. Being an artist herself, she understood him better than a lot of people. She did photography; not just people but anything that caught her soul. He'd seen her work before, in magazines and in a few galleries; and he understood why she was in such demand. She was really good. Good enough to set up her own company and actually do well in it. Once he retired from fighting, he hoped his work would do as well.

  "Take your clothes off then," he said softly, holding her gaze as he conveyed a silent message. "Slowly."

  With a little grin, she started to do as she was told. There was no hint of any shyness or reservations; not that he had expected any. She was as brazen as they came. He sat back in the chair as his eyes followed her every move. The time had finally come, and as he had known, it was worth waiting for.

  Moving to the beat of the music, she slowly rid herself of her clothes, her eyes on his face the whole time. He knew what she saw in his eyes; burning need. He swore he could actually hear his heart beating quicker and quicker with every inch of skin she exposed.

  Finally, she knelt before him on the cushion completely naked, perfection personified. The gentle light cast a golden glow on her skin and hair, making her looks like those of a naughty little angel. She got on all fours, her eyes on his and the naughty grin still on her face as she advanced on him slowly, like a wild cat advancing on its prey. The only difference was running was the last thing on his mind. He was going to let her catch him, to let her do whatever her little heart desired.

  Because, in all honesty, he'd never been as horny as he was in that moment.

  It was almost six in the morning when Rae finally made her way back to the room she shared with her friends. Both of them were fast asleep but she knew they would be up soon for their morning workout.

  With a stupid little smile on her face, she took her clothes off and found one of Corey's t-shirts. Her hair was still a bit damp from the shower she'd just had with Nate when he'd said goodbye to her in the filthiest kind of way. She was getting hot just thinking about it! She wondered briefly if, if she hadn't been looking for a relationship and she'd set her sights on Nate, would she still have been blown away by the chemistry? There was no doubt she would have noticed him, he was hot after all.

  She made herself comfortable in Corey's arm and fell asleep almost straight away. Nate hadn't let her sleep at all.

  The moment he realised she was asleep, Corey opened his eyes and looked down at her. She had a little smile on her face, so obviously things had gone well with Nate. He still didn't know how to feel about that. He wanted her to be happy, he really d
id, but he already felt like he was losing her.

  She stirred and made herself more comfortable on his chest, tangling her legs with his under the sheets. He was well aware platonic friends didn't really do that, and soon she would realise that and stop. She'd be saving her cuddles for Nate. She'd save everything for Nate.

  He held her closer and buried his face in her hair, which he realised was still damp. Why did she have to change? What was so wrong with fucking whoever she wanted then coming home to him? It had worked so well for them before. Obviously it was the list. The more things she had done on it the more she had changed. He was going to have to get his hands on it and see what else he had to expect. He didn't want to wake up one day and hear she'd got herself pregnant. Finding a proper relationship was one thing. Having another man's babies was quite another. He might have kissed the big house and room for a few ponies away, but it was a bit harder letting go of the images he had of their children. Still, he would have to. No one made those sort of pacts, anyway, except in movies. Besides, he could always find someone when he was ready to settle down, and Rae would always be in his life, anyway. It wasn't like she was dying, or anything like that and he'd never see her again.

  Chapter Ten

  Before she got off the plane she reapplied her make-up and sorted her hair. She knew it was pointless, Corey would know straight away that she had been crying.

  The past two days had been more painful than she had imagined. She had got to see her dad on his own turf with the family that she had never wanted to know. Two little half brothers and a step mum. They had turned out to be sweet, kind people, nothing like she had always imagined.

  From the moment Irving had picked her up at the airport in Austin she'd felt like she'd been swept away into another world. Sara had been so happy to finally meet her, she was positive she'd seen a few tears glimmer in the older woman's eyes. Her little brothers, Drew and Timmy, had shown no reservations at all. The whole time she'd been there they had more or less been stuck to her, telling her, the way only a six and a four year old could, how happy they were about her being their sister. They had accepted her with no questions asked.

  They had treated her as part of their family from the word go. Her very first night, the boys had asked for a bed time story from her and she'd sat with them long after they had fallen asleep, thinking how much she had missed of their young lives. How different would her life have been if she had accepted her father when he had found her? How different would it have been if she had time now to get to know them? When she had gone back downstairs she had sat with Irving and Sara and talked well into the night. It had been so long since she had felt like she belonged...

  In her own room, she had cried herself to sleep both nights. She had started wishing she had not come up with the stupid list in the first place. It would have been so much easier to say goodbye to Irving if she'd never told herself she had to get to know him first. She just hadn't expected to like him that much. She had thought she'd just throw him a few crumbs, you know; do him a little favour for all the years he had tried to be in her life. Now, not only would she have to say goodbye to the incredible man she had come to know, she had to say goodbye to a whole new family.

  When they had dropped her off at the airport, they had made her promise to visit them again soon. She'd had to lie to them that she would. She couldn't do that again, it was too painful.

  So for most of the flight, she had sat in her seat and silently cried to herself. It had been only as they were landing that she had thought to tidy herself up for Corey to try and avoid any awkward questions.

  "Rae!"

  She looked around and saw Corey waving at her to get her attention. Plastering a smile on her lips, she pulled her bag to where he was waiting and walked into his arms. Her dear friend, where in the world would she be without him?

  "You all right?" he asked, tilting her face up so he could look at her.

  "Yeah. I have two little brothers," she answered.

  She hadn't meant it to sound so shaky.

  "Was it too much?" he asked softly.

  She buried her face in his chest instead of answering. She didn't want to talk about the new family she was leaving behind.

  "Let's go home," Corey said as he took her bag and led her out of the airport, his protective arm around her the whole time.

  The ride to their house was made in almost complete silence. She had too much whirling around in her mind, she knew she would have burst into tears again right there if he asked any questions. As always, he knew her well enough to understand that without her having to say anything. Of course, that meant an explanation later, but for now she was happy for the reprieve.

  Corey drove his car up the driveway of the house they had bought together a few years back. Neither of them were hardly ever home due to work commitments, so because of that, this house had become their haven, the one place in the world where they could just chill out.

  "Mum invited us over for dinner tonight. Should I cancel?" Corey asked when they walked into the house.

  "God, no! Your mum will only blame me," Rae said as she walked into the lounge.

  The TV was blaring and John was sprawled out on one of the sofas watching a music channel.

  "Hey, sweetheart," he said when he saw her. "How did it go?"

  "Don't you have your own house to go to?" Rae grumbled as she dropped herself next to him and let him give her a hug.

  "Is that the thanks I get for coming all this way to keep you company tomorrow?"

  "I already said I don't want a fuss," she said firmly. "If either of you decide to throw a party I swear I will chop your balls off and feed them to the dogs!"

  "Ouch! What the hell's got you?"

  She let out a tired sigh just as Corey walked in after taking her bag up to her room.

  "Nothing. I'm just tired."

  "Maybe something in here will cheer you up," Corey said as he dropped a bunch of letters onto her lap.

  "I doubt it," she mumbled as she went through the letters.

  Her heart missed a beat when she realised that half of them were from the doctor's office. Corey would have noticed that too because the return address was on the back. She tensed up as she realised she might have to explain why. She wasn't ready to do that just yet. She'd ignored the doctor's calls on her cell phone but she hadn't really thought he would write to the house.

  "What's all that about, Rae?"

  When she looked up she realised both men had been watching her reactions.

  "Oh, nothing," she lied. "I went for some blood tests some time ago, like I do every few months."

  "There's at least five letters from Dr. Harvey's office. They can't all be about one blood test."

  She noticed John perk up a bit at the mention of the doctor then remembered he had answered her phone the previous week. What had she told him? Headache?

  "I did a few female checks, too," she lied. "Nothing to worry about, I'm fine."

  "How do you know that if you haven't opened the letters?" Corey asked.

  "Because I was anxious so I went to Dr. Harvey before my trip to Columbia. You know they write to you anyway to tell you your results are back. These must have been already in the post when I went there."

  Had she been convincing? She hoped so. Corey was the one person who could always catch her lies but this was the one time she needed him to buy it. In a couple of weeks or so, when she had done all she needed to do, she would tell him. Not everything, of course, just about the cancer. If he found out now, she had no doubt he would drag her to the doctor's office and force her into treatment. Then she would be forced to go through useless chemo while Corey watched her die. That would be worse than the dying itself. She couldn't do that to him.

  She threw the letters aside and put her feet up. She knew they were still watching her.

  "What?" she frowned.

  "It's just that there was a bunch of messages on the phone for you as well."

  Oh, crap! Weren't
these doctors supposed to respect your privacy and all that?

  "Who was it?" she asked as if she didn't know.

  "Dr. Harvey wants you to come in," he explained.

  He was watching her face closely, so obviously his brain was ticking.

  "I spoke to him already," she said, brushing it off. "Last week. John knows that."

  Corey looked at John for confirmation.

  "Well, I answered her phone while she was asleep..." John said.

  Bull crap! It was only a little white lie and John couldn't even do that. She knew he was going to explain that he'd answered her phone and only took a message. He had no idea if she'd called the doctor back.

  "See?" she cut in. "Now, if both of you will just shut up, I've had a rough few days. I'm going to take a little nap before I freshen up and get ready for your mum's dinner."

  With that, she picked her mail up and stood to leave the room.

  "Rae, what the hell is going on?" Corey said, grabbing her arm before she could walk out. "What are you hiding from me?"

  "Nothing!" she snapped. "I've just spent a couple of days with my brand new family. My little brothers told me they love me. Forgive me for thinking everything else right now is total bullshit!"

  With that she pulled her arm out of Corey's grasp and angrily stormed out of the room.

  As soon as she was safely in her room, she let out a sigh and prayed that had done the trick. She deserved an Oscar for that performance!

  "Rae, come on. You look gorgeous, let's go already!"

  "How do I look gorgeous, I'm not even dressed yet?" she chuckled as she riffled through the clothes in her wardrobe.

  She wasn't feeling attractive at all. After she'd lain down on her bed that afternoon, she'd had another one of her attacks. After the sleeping pill had worn off she'd still felt so tired and going to see Corey's family was the last thing on her mind. But because she had promised to go, she thought if she made a bit of an effort with her clothes she'd feel better about herself and maybe draw attention away from the bags under her eyes.

  "You know you don't need to dress up," Corey said from his spot on her king sized bed. "A pair of jeans will do."