Forbidden Fruit: Volume 1

by Harley, Lisa M.

  My heart caught in my throat at her question and my fake smile dropped immediately. I glanced quickly at Conner, unsure of how to answer as he leaned forward and cleared his throat.

  “We aren’t seeing each other,” Conner spoke slowly and carefully as he warily glanced at me and back to the reporter. I swallowed and tried my best to keep my hands steady. I was shaking so badly that I couldn’t even hold a thought. I kept my mouth shut, knowing if I spoke it could be misconstrued. I had overheard Gordon telling that to Mitchell over and over again; thankfully, he didn’t use those words.

  The reporter pursed her lips together and gave a snide smile as if she knew a secret. I was pretty sure she did have one based on her whole demeanor changing. Her posture became more upright as she reached down for a photo in her lap. As she held it up, I also noticed there were several more photos behind it. Her head tilted just a little as if daring me to look at the photo.

  I gasped and felt the blood drain from my face as I stared at a picture of Conner and me at the bar the first night we met. His body was in between my legs and his hands were thrust through my hair. My arms were wrapped around him, my hands clutching at his shirt obviously pulling him closer to my body. As if that wasn’t enough, she then placed that one down in her lap to reveal the next photo. This one with Conner’s hand along the side of my breast and we were very clearly becoming more intimate. With each picture she showed, it was obvious that when the last one showed us outside of the bathroom door, what our full intent was. If she had flipped the pictures, it could have been a frame-by-frame movie of our first meeting.

  The room was silent as Conner sat up and casually placed his hand over the back of my chair. Crossing his ankle over the other leg, he sat back nonchalantly as if the whole world hadn’t just found out that we had sex in a bar bathroom. Oh mon Dieu, my mother might see this.

  “Considering this is something that is between two consenting adults and obviously you’re showing this purely for titillation purposes, what does this have to do with my mother’s re-election?”

  “Well, actually, I was just about to get to that,” the reporter smugly stated. I shifted in my seat, completely unsure of what to say or do. I stared down shamefully as tears welled up in my eyes. Conner’s hand cupped my shoulder and he squeezed gently. I couldn’t look at anyone. I just wanted to leave. “I believe that most everyone knows your intended future with Mary Rothford. Should we assume you are broken up again or is this just a one night fling with the nanny?” My breath hitched at her remark as my head jerked up to look at her. She curtly smiled at me while tilting her head.

  “Were you led to believe there was something more between you and Conner? Or did you not know about his girlfriend? The same girlfriend that he accompanied to the fund raising banquet just last night.” A shooting pain stabbed my heart hearing that he was with her last night before he came to me. I already knew that when Gordon reminded Conner about the banquet yesterday, but hearing that comment from the reporter made me feel as though he were intimate with her before me. Was Conner playing me too? Or was he really finished with Mary? Questions and doubts filled my thoughts and coupled with the photos the reporter just produced, my stomach rolled with nausea.

  “All right, that’s enough. There really is no reason for this,” Gordon interrupted, attempting to keep his voice calm. I briefly looked back at him and his cold stare at me spoke volumes. Although I couldn’t tell if it was because I was obviously with Conner or because I may have just drawn negative attention to his wife’s campaign. Regardless, he was extremely upset.

  “Actually, there is a reason for this. Senator Winchester, were you aware of your son and nanny having a relationship?”

  “I wasn’t aware of this. However, I, uh, fully believe that my son has his right to privacy, as does my Au Pair.”

  “Were you also aware that your Au Pair posed nude for a photographer?” I felt bile rise up my throat and I swallowed hard trying to keep it down as the reporter then produced more photos…of my body. I was just about to protest those could be of anyone until she arrived at the last one. The black and white photo showed a woman clutching her bare breast, her head tilted back as if in pure ecstasy. As I gaped at the picture, there was no question that it was me. Jacques.

  I couldn’t take anymore nor did I know what I would even say. Completely ashamed to even look anyone in the eyes, I fled the room. What was even worse was hearing the reporter make a snide remark about having a “very naughty Au Pair” and laughing about it as she said it.

  With each step I took up the stairs, my shame and embarrassment increased. As I slammed the door to my bathroom behind me and knelt at the toilet, I knew this would be the end of my job here. Even if they did keep me on, I don’t think I would be able to face anyone again. This was all going to be on national television.

  As I gripped the sides of the toilet attempting to empty out my shame, I heard a knock. As I flipped through the entire ordeal in my mind, I didn’t want to answer it. I continued to sit there just staring at the white porcelain with tears pouring down my face. I’m sure it was Lauren wanting nothing more than to fire me and call me all sorts of names. I lay down on the cool tile wanting nothing more than to become non-existent.

  A very familiar woodsy scent filled the air, bringing me back to just hours ago when the world didn’t know of my scandalous lifestyle. Conner sat down next to me on the floor and pulled me to his chest with his strong arms. I pressed my face into his chest and continued to cry my tears of humiliation.

  “Shh,” he whispered as he kissed the top of my head, hugging me tighter to his body. “It’ll be okay. Things like this blow over quickly. She’s a new reporter and just wants to make a name for herself.”

  “It won’t blow over for me. It’ll follow me the rest of my life. I’ll never be able to watch children again,” I cried as the realization hit me just from saying the words. Conner didn’t respond which confirmed my fears. He knew it also.

  He took a deep breath as he tenderly kissed my lips. “Hey now. Crying over it isn’t going to make it go away. Come on. Mom wants to see you in her office. Whatever happens, you need to know that I’m here for you. Really, I am.”

  I knew he probably wouldn’t be there for me after I speak with Lauren. Why would she ever want her son to be with someone like me?

  Chapter Eleven

  Angelina

  I entered the room with Conner close behind me. His hand lingered around the back of my neck, his fingers pressed small massaging circles as if attempting to give me confidence.

  Lauren was pacing behind her huge mahogany desk. The blinds on the large window were almost drawn, casting an eerie feeling through the room. I could barely make out the grey skies between the slats, but heard the rapping of the rain against the window. I found it fitting how the weather outside matched my crumbling world. Lauren’s head snapped up when Conner closed the door behind us. Her glare made me cringe with fear.

  “You’re fired,” she spat with hatred, her face completely contorted and red with anger. I nodded and turned leave. “Don’t leave yet. Gordon. Conner. Please leave us.” Merde. Not knowing what else she would want made the pit in my stomach even worse.

  “I think we should talk about this. I mean, she’s my employee also,” Gordon attempted to sound authoritative, but seemed to back down when he caught his wife’s glare.

  Conner then interjected, “I agree with Gordon. I think this is something we really should discuss together.”

  Lauren’s mouth formed into a strange snarl as she shook her head and glared back and forth between both men. The two men I’ve slept with. The shame of what I had done bore down on me. If I didn’t feel sick enough before, I really felt the bile starting to rise now.

  “Kindly excuse us, because I fully believe that someone who thinks only with their lower appendage should not make this decision. Angelina will be leaving, but not before I have a few words with her.” She glared at both men, especially Gordon wh
o turned toward the door.

  Conner pulled me into an embrace and whispered, “I’ll stay, if you want me to. Whatever she says to you, just let it roll off. She doesn’t mean it, she’s just upset about the campaign right now.” I nodded into his shoulder and then pulled back.

  “I’ll be fine,” I whispered, even though I didn’t feel like I would be. I had no intention of Conner having to choose between his mother and me. He took my cheeks in his hands and leaned down to kiss me, stopping for a moment as Lauren cleared her throat. Conner gave a small smile right before he pressed his lips to mine. He was giving me strength to face whatever Lauren had to say to me through his kiss. He pulled back and pecked my lips quickly as he cupped my shoulder and squeezed lightly.

  I stood in the middle of the room, needing to sit down, but knowing I wasn’t welcome to do so. Lauren took a step toward me as soon as Conner closed the door. My heart was beating fast and the room was quiet except for the pelting of rain against the windows.

  She stood in front of me as I continued to look down at the floor. Her beige high heels were polished to perfection and stopped right in front of me. My hands started to shake and I clasped them in front of me when she started to speak. “You are to leave our household. If you speak with any reporter or any reporter speaks to you then I will forfeit the money I am about to give you. I am paying you to leave. I am paying you to be quiet and if you ever speak of this to anyone or even try to come back, I will make sure to let everyone know about the affair you’re having with my husband.”

  My head snapped up in surprise and my mouth dropped open. My heart almost beat out of my chest as she gave a smug smile and continued, “Yes. I know. I have security cameras Gordon doesn’t even know about. Do you think you’re the only one? You think you’re the only hot young thing he’s had an affair with?” She pressed her lips together as she then smacked her lips. “You’re not. He’s had many affairs before.”

  “Whu…why,” I started to ask, but couldn’t get the words out. My mind whirling over what she just told me. Gordon never loved me. He was never going to leave her for me. Just like Jacques. Only Jacques never promised me that he would leave his wife and marry me.

  “Why stay with him? Because he knows a lot of people in Washington. He has a lot of pull. And in front of the cameras we have the perfect marriage and it works for my constituents. Gordon has always had many…tastes. I’ve learned to deal with his ways as long as he understands he’s not leaving this marriage. The last thing I need is to deal with a divorce on top of all the work I have to do. However, if this does get out, it’ll be you who’s known as a tramp and I’ll have the sympathy.” She casually walked back to her desk and picked up what seemed to be a check. Striding over to me with a confidence of victory, she handed me the slip of paper. I didn’t bother to look at it as I continued to try to absorb all the information she just told me.

  I was fooled again. Yet, I felt a slight relief that I wouldn’t be the person to actually break up their marriage or take away the home that Mitchell knows of. It was actually slightly comforting to me.

  “You will remember the confidentiality agreement you signed. This check is part of it also, with the understanding of what I just said. Do you get my point, Angelina?” Her voice seemed somewhat softer than it had been before.

  I nodded, knowing that she was the type of person that would make sure to follow through on her promise. “Yes, I…we have an understanding, Lauren.”

  “Good. You may go ahead and pack your suitcases. Claude will take you to the airport and he has your ticket. Your flight is already arranged to leave at seven tonight,” she stated. She walked back to her desk to proceed with her work, as if we had just discussed plans for the next day and not the termination of my employment here. Or the fact that I’ll never be able to be an Au Pair again. Or even that I slept with her husband. I wondered if the story would be seen overseas and my family would have knowledge of it. More tears brimmed my eyes as I turned to leave.

  “Oh, and one more thing, dear,” Lauren began in a sweet, calm voice. “My son, Conner, he’s also off limits to you. He has his life laid out before him and I won’t have some little tramp fuck it all up for him. His life will be in politics.” I turned my head sideways wondering if she was going to approach me. “Having a whore who fucked his step-father would really screw that all up, don’t you think?” I swallowed and continued to walk toward the door feeling my lips tremble with remorse, knowing she was perfectly right. My hand shook as I reached for the doorknob and pulled it open.

  Conner was standing outside the door with his arms crossed over his chest, his face filled with worry. As soon as I exited pulling the door closed behind me, our eyes briefly met. His expression changed from worry to concern as he saw the tears streaming down my face. I tried to pass him to hurry upstairs, but he grabbed my arm.

  “What did she say? Are you okay?” Conner asked as he attempted to pull me close.

  I pulled away knowing what Lauren had said was true. That Conner’s life was laid out for him and I didn’t want to ruin his chances of what might be for him. “I’ll be fine, Conner. I have a flight back to France and need to go pack.”

  “Well, I’ll go with you. To France,” he blurted out as he grabbed my waist and pulled me tightly to him. “We can be together. I just want to be with you.” His voice was convincing and I longed for what he desired too.

  What Lauren just said to me flashed through my mind as I pushed Conner away from me. “Non. Please. You need to stay here and finish your career. You have a lot to look forward to,” I stammered as I pulled out of his tight hold on me.

  I turned and started up the stairs as Conner continued to follow me, his words rushed out, “You know I don’t want that. I never wanted that. We discussed that just yesterday.” I felt like he was practically begging me, but the last thing I wanted was for him to leave his future for me.

  I stopped just in front of my door and grabbed the doorknob. Knowing that if he came into my room, I would melt into his arms. I mustered up all the courage I could to convince him. “You can’t be with me.” I glanced down remembering what I said to him our first night together. “I actually have a boyfriend in France. The one I wanted to forget about at the bar. He…he lives there and I love him. I can finally be with him.” I hated every word that came out of my mouth, but knew this would be the only way he might let me leave without questioning. Confusion swept over his face changing to anger quickly.

  “That’s bullshit. You’re lying to me,” he snapped angrily as he glared into my eyes.

  I stared back, trying to be as confident as possible. “I’m very sorry that I led you on,” I admitted, trying to push back my tears.

  “If you hadn’t been fired, would you have told me?” His jaw was set firm with anger; his eyes bore into me with hatred.

  It would be better this way. For him to hate me so we could both go about our lives. I shook the hair from my face, took a deep breath for courage and lied, “No. I had planned on enjoying our time together until my employment was finished.”

  He glared at me, his anger building with every second he stood there. “So, you really are just a cold lying tramp like my mom said,” he spat at me through gritted teeth. “I trusted you, dammit,” he shouted at me as he turned and stormed away.

  I watched him continue down the hallway and then turn the corner to go down the stairs. My breath caught when I heard the front door slam, knowing that sound was also ending whatever could have been between us.

  Completely heartbroken, I pushed my door open and quickly shut it behind me. As I slumped to the floor, I knew that would be the last time I would see Conner. Ever. I rested my head against my folded arms and let my tears flow.

  Chapter Twelve

  Angelina

  I stood on the small white platform and removed my silk robe. Madame Francine, the art director, approached me and positioned my body the way the class needed to sketch me for this session. When I first began
my new job, being naked for close to two hours in front of a room of strangers was terrifying. Now, after a couple of months, I was entirely used to it. And the money was pretty good, too.

  Feeling her cool hands on my body gave me goose bumps and she offered me an apologetic smile. She turned my body to face away, but positioned my head to the side, as if I were looking back toward someone. She wrapped my hands across my body appearing to cover my nakedness. The lights began to warm me, just like they always do. I relaxed and thought of what I would do later on in the day.

  Madame Francine thanked her students and then nodded toward me, signaling that I could place my robe back on. My body was stiff after being in the same position for so long, so reaching for my robe made me flinch slightly. From the corner of my eye, I noticed a student approaching me. It wasn’t the first time, but since my thoughts were still consumed by a certain man, I’ve turned down every “coffee” offer extended to me. Until I was able to get over that one man that still has my heart, I knew I wouldn’t be able to give any other man my full attention.

  I inhaled deeply, smelling a wonderful familiar scent. “You make an exquisite model. I enjoyed sketching you,” the man hesitantly told me as I turned quickly to the deep voice I recognized.

  “Conner,” I gasped excitedly and beamed. My smile faded quickly as I noticed his serious gaze. The look on his face reminded me of the last time I saw him. My eyes darted around the room as nervous energy surged through me, unsure of what he might want to say to me. Although, the fact that he crossed the ocean warmed my heart and gave me some confidence that this might be a friendly discussion.

  “I had hoped to find you here in Arles. I remembered you telling me that you’ve always wanted to live here. Not to mention how striking you are, becoming a model seems fitting. Seeing your beautiful body would compel any artist to create a masterpiece,” he teased with a hesitant smile.