Just to See You Smile

by Sally John

  Forty-Eight

  Alec dozed fitfully, lying atop the bedspread fully clothed. Every few minutes he checked the cell phone on the night-stand. Plugged into an outlet, it was recharging, taking forever and a day… And then the power went off.

  What was Anne doing? Was she sleeping on a couch? In a guest room? Could she hear him snoring?

  It wasn’t that he didn’t trust her. Of course he trusted her. Implicitly. He even trusted Manning. He seemed a decent sort; he paid his employees well. A believer, Anne said.

  Kevin was a believer.

  Kevin. Kevin and his much younger girlfriend. Women were attracted to older men. Even men with beards and graying hair? But Annie wouldn’t feel that.

  Would she?

  At last, emotionally spent, he slept. A tiny ding woke him. Voice mail message alert! He reached for the phone. Beside it, the clock’s red digital dial flashed 12:23, which didn’t mean anything except that the power had clicked back on 23 minutes ago. He turned on the lamp. The tiny digits on the cell phone read 2:40.

  He fumbled with the correct sequence on the number pad. At last succeeding, he found six new messages.

  Alec rubbed sleep from his eyes. He listened to three messages from the office, cutting them off immediately after hearing the first utterance. The next two messages were a girl’s voice, talking to Drew. The kid was grounded. Heart throbbing in his throat, he waited for the last message.

  “Hey, mister.” His bones felt like rubber. It was Annie. “I can’t get through…”

  He replayed the message three times, his grin broadening with each repeated sentence. She was at a motel. She loved him.

  Should he call her? No, she needed to rest. But…he’d be there when she woke up.

  “Who is it?” Anne peered through the peephole of the motel room door but saw only a white paper bag.

  “Breakfast-in-bed delivery man.”

  “Alec!” She hurriedly undid the locks and opened the door. “Alec!”

  Grinning, he held his arms wide, a bag in each hand. “Coffee and bagels. Cream cheese with pecans.”

  She laughed and tugged on his coat lapel, guiding him inside the room. Bagels and cream cheese? That coffee shop was nowhere on the route between home and the motel. He had gone out of his way. “You’ve been busy.”

  “I got an early start. Nice room.” He set the bags on the desk and removed his coat while she took out the styrofoam containers. “Thanks.” He accepted a cup from her; then he set it back down. “But first things first.” He took the other cup from her hand and set it aside.

  “What?”

  He smiled, wrapped his arms around her shoulders, and looked into her eyes. “Annie, you are so beautiful.”

  She slipped her arms around his waist. With those cinnamon eyes so focused on her, she thought she was still dreaming. When he kissed her, she hoped she’d never wake up.

  “Good morning, sweetheart.”

  “Morning, mister.”

  He kissed her again, and she began to lose interest in drinking hot coffee.

  “Did I wake you?”

  “Mm-hmm.” She nodded, her forehead against his. It wasn’t even six o’clock.

  “I couldn’t sleep,” he murmured. “I wanted to make sure you were all right. Did you sleep well?”

  “Mm-hmm, but not until late. I think it was after one. Are the kids okay?”

  “I woke up Drew and put him in charge of the morning.” He kissed her eyelids. “He’s working off some jail time. He promised to get the girls to school.”

  She smiled. “Really?”

  “Yep. You don’t have to go anywhere. I brought clothes for you.”

  “Really?”

  He grinned. “Really. And shampoo and that hair mousse stuff and some lotion I think you put on your face. Oh, and some bubble bath.”

  She laughed. “What’s gotten into you?”

  His face sobered, and he kissed the tip of her nose. “I don’t want to lose you. I don’t want Charlie Manning to know you better than I do. I don’t want to lose track of us. Annie, I did break something. I broke our vows. I am so sorry, sweetheart.”

  Her chest felt as if her heart skidded to a halt. Suspended, life crumbled within her. She withdrew from his embrace and sat on the bed.

  Alec knelt before her. “I’m sorry. I never should have made you go to work full-time. It’s dividing our family.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “The vows. You know. I promised we would always live on my income. That you could be a full-time mom and keep painting. You gave up school for me. I never wanted you to quit your art altogether.”

  “The vows!” Her breath flung itself back into her body, jolting her senses. “The ones we wrote! Oh, Alec! I thought—” She covered her mouth with her hands.

  “What is it? What did you think?”

  “I thought you did what Kevin did!”

  “What Kevin—? Oh, no, Annie.” He sat beside her and held her tightly. “Never. I could never do that to you. No, I’m talking about what we wrote. I’m sorry. I let you down.”

  They sat quietly holding each other. Anne silently thanked God. If he had—but she didn’t have to think what if. The working situation, the financial situation…that could be remedied. “Alec, something good is coming from it. Look.” She pointed across the room toward the easel.

  “You painted!” He went over to it and studied it. “Annie, it’s beautiful.”

  “You think so?”

  “It’s our house.” His voice caught.

  It was their house in springtime. Lilacs bloomed at the corner of the front porch, multicolored tulips and yellow daffodils surrounded its base, the peonies along the drive were full of buds, the flowering pear blossomed, and bright green leaves emerged from the maple’s branches. The upstairs windows reflected the morning sun’s rays.

  She went and stood beside him, slipping a hand into the crook of his elbow. “Well, technically it’s rough. It was so hard to begin, but I did it. And it feels— Oh, Alec, it feels like I’ve come home.”

  He kissed the top of her head. “Then you should keep painting.”

  “I agree. If I keep working, I can keep myself in supplies.”

  He stiffened.

  “You know the woman who took time off to have the baby?”

  He nodded.

  “She’s not coming back. Charlie needs me full-time. If I want.”

  “Do you want?”

  She touched his cheek. “I don’t know. Do you want?”

  “I don’t want to tell you what to do or coerce you into something because of my anxieties.”

  She smiled. “We know God brought us this far. He won’t let us down. Can we leave it for now?”

  “Okay.” Though his tone was strong, his facial expression remained tentative. He wanted the issue settled now.

  Well, she wasn’t ready. “Are you wearing jeans to work or are you going home?”

  He shook his head. “Neither. I brought my work clothes, too.”

  “Really?”

  He gave her a half smile. “Really.”

  “Then I do know what I want.”

  “What?”

  “Bagels, bubbles, and you.” She slid her arms around his waist. “And not necessarily in that order.”

  Forty-Nine

  Joel opened his office door and peered out into the main area. “Lynnie, get Britte down here, please.”

  The woman gave him a look. The dismissal bell just rang and a slew of anxious adolescents have descended in need of who knows what and the phone is ringing and Britte’s more than likely as swamped as I am and on her way to the gym.

  He gave her a look in return. I know all that! Just do it. He ducked back inside his quiet space wishing he had adolescents to deal with rather than Bruce Waverly. “Bruce, would you like some coffee?”

  “No, thank you.” The man stood facing the window, his hands clasped behind his back. The superintendent of schools was a long time Val
ley Oaks fixture and the consummate politician. Joel respected the man’s ability to smooth ruffled feathers and keep the district sailing along under budget.

  “I forgot. You’re a tea drinker.”

  Bruce turned. He was shorter than Joel and compact. His dark brown wavy hair should have been gray by now. As always, he was dapperly dressed in a dark suit. “Tea would be great.”

  “Be right back.”

  In the nearby kitchenette, he stuck a mug of water into the microwave. While it heated, he found a small bottle of orange juice in the refrigerator and downed it in three gulps. There was a storm raging in his head. In spite of the ibuprofen he’d been swallowing all afternoon, he knew he had a fever. Lynnie had come after him with a thermometer, but he insisted it didn’t matter. He wasn’t going home.

  He carried the hot mug into the outer office. Britte approached from the other direction.

  In spite of feeling as though he’d been run over by a semi, he smiled and for a split second forgot he wasn’t one of the teenagers. The sight of the woman turned his insides to mush. If students weren’t milling three feet behind her… Maybe they could have dinner…

  She smiled back. “I’m kind of busy.”

  He mouthed “Waverly” and put his hand on the door-knob.

  “Oh.”

  He whispered, “Are you sick?” Her eyes looked as red and glassy as his felt.

  She shook her head and sneezed into a tissue.

  Joel pushed open his door and followed her inside. “Here you go, Bruce. I brought you a few choices.” He set the mug along with a box of assorted tea bags on his desk and stepped around to his chair. He needed to sit.

  “Thanks. Hello, Britte.” He busied himself with his tea.

  “Hi, Bruce. How are you?”

  “Just fine. I know you’re both busy. Please have a seat.” He settled into one of the chairs facing Joel’s desk. They followed suit. “I wanted to tell you the latest on that complaint filed by Hughes and Larson. Obviously Hughes is out of the picture. The man has major problems. It turns out that Larson works for an accounting firm whose biggest client is a wholesale company of which Hughes is a partner. Alec Sutton dug up that bit of information yesterday. I imagine there was a little coercion going on from Hughes to Larson. Their allegations won’t be taken seriously by any board member. So just keep on coaching to your heart’s content and don’t worry about that stuff.”

  Britte’s eyebrows went up. “Whew! I don’t know whether to laugh or cry. I wish Jordan and Janine had better role models for fathers, but it’s a relief to know I can keep coaching.”

  “Yes, you’re home free on that matter, so go ahead and laugh. You’ve put up with a lot of bunk. But speaking of role models…” He sipped his tea.

  Joel felt his pulse quicken and kept his eyes on the superintendent. If he glanced at Britte, they would look guilty. Of course…they were guilty…in a sense.

  Bruce cleared his throat and set his mug on the desk. “My neighbor walks her dog early in the morning, oftentimes on your street, Britte. She has three elementary age children and has ambitions, I believe, to win a seat on the board and run the district single-handedly. Nice enough woman, but she is a bit of a,” he paused, tapping his fingertips together, “busy-body. Sunday she told me that she saw your car, Joel, parked at Britte’s house. By then I had heard about the Gordon Hughes business and told her it was probably related to that. Today she called to report that she had just seen you drop Britte off at her house about 6:30. I told her you were both athletic nuts and had probably already been to the Community Center gym. After I hung up, I remembered dialing what I thought was your number at 6 A.M. A woman answered.”

  “At the risk of sounding like a teenager, sir, it’s not what it looks like.”

  Bruce held up a hand. “I don’t want details. I don’t want excuses.” His voice hardened. “Your private lives are your own. However, I will not tolerate inappropriate appearances. If my neighbor gets wind of anything like this happening again—and she will be watching closely, I guarantee—I will not cover for you. We don’t need this kind of gossip, especially about you, Joel. It’s contract time. Not to mention that you’re both a little controversial as it is. Although, quite frankly, she’s not after your hide, Britte.”

  Joel knew Britte was about to pop and said quickly, “I promise nothing that looks inappropriate will happen again, sir.”

  “Glad to hear it. I don’t want to lose you, Joel. You’re doing a good job here, but we need to keep the constituents happy.” He stood. “Well, I’ll let you two get back to work. Thanks for your time.”

  Joel shook his hand. “Thank you, Bruce.”

  “Britte. Good luck at regionals. By the way, you both look as if you should see a doctor. Goodbye.” He left, leaving the door conspicuously wide open behind him.

  Britte’s face was crimson now. Joel went for diffusing and said in a low voice, “Guess that means no more overnights.”

  She didn’t smile. “How could you sit there and not explain?” At least she spoke through clenched teeth. People in the outer office wouldn’t overhear their conversation.

  “He didn’t want explanations.” Joel leaned across his desk. “Britte, he’s the ultimate politician. He has to keep the community as happy as possible. If we interfere with that happiness, he can make waves concerning our future. Big waves.”

  “It’s not fair!”

  He couldn’t help but smile. She was so idealistic. “That’s not the point. We’re in the public eye. I have to court you in the public eye, not in each other’s houses.”

  “Politics shouldn’t enter in at all.”

  “But everything he said was true. I didn’t choose the best course of action. Saturday night I should have had Cal get some off-duty cop to watch your house. I should have let him take me home. Last night I should have tried harder to get you home.” They could have walked it, if he hadn’t been so…so giddy. Giddy! Marine Staff Sergeant Joel Kingsley, giddy!

  “But nothing happened!”

  “It’s the appearance, Britte.”

  A sudden change came over her face. Her eyes widened as if she were struck by a new thought. Her clenched jaw slackened, but she didn’t tell him what was going on inside that mind of hers.

  “What?” he asked.

  She shook her head. “I’m late for practice.” With that and a sneeze, she was out the door.

  He sat back in his chair. Well, whatever, she’d get over it. Bruce Waverly’s ultimatum changed nothing between them. As Joel had told her, he would just have to do his courting in public. They were both committed to being role models to the students. It would be a challenge to show the kids an appropriate example of courtship and marriage.

  Marriage?

  That was a brand-new thought, but… Maybe he was ready for brand-new thoughts. He knew for certain that his heart beat differently these days. He also knew that Jesus had given him a brand-new life. Now, for the first time, he felt with joyful anticipation what that meant. There was no way he was going back to living in the emotionless void.

  Britte rushed through the vacant halls to her classroom, gathered her attaché bag, coat, a box of tissues, and then raced to the gym. Her throat ached and her eyes burned, but what hurt even worse was her heart.

  Ten to one Joel Kingsley would be out of here by the end of June.

  Why hadn’t she caught on sooner? She had been duped by their compatibility, his ability to capture her attention unlike anyone ever had, and, yes, even their shared penchant for being controversial figures. And now she felt her heart cracking, deep fissures splitting it open, ripping the breath from her.

  Lord, why did You let this happen?

  Britte walked into the gym, surprised to see Anne and Tanner there with the girls who were already doing warm-up drills. She dumped her things on a bleacher as Anne walked over to her.

  “Britte.” There was immediate concern in her voice. She touched Britte’s forehead. “Go home, girl. You’ve
got a fever.”

  “What are you doing here?”

  “I got off work early. Tanner and I figured you could use some extra help with only two games left this week and the tournament next week.”

  “Who’s that up there?” She nodded toward a lone figure sitting high in the bleachers, his face bent over a book.

  “He’s a cousin of Jordan and Trevor’s, a college student. He’s taking them back home to their aunt’s in Rockville after practice. Their mom is still at the shelter.”

  Another wave of anguish flowed through her. “What a horrific situation that is!”

  “Hon, we’re doing what we can to help. The girls are so protective. And your idea to have Trevor be manager seems to be making all the difference in his attitude. What’s wrong with your breathing?”

  She stared at her friend for a moment, wanting to blame someone. Why not a school board member’s wife? “Oh, Anne, can’t Alec keep Joel here?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “You know he won’t be rehired. Bruce Waverly just said as much in the office.”

  Anne picked up Britte’s coat and handed it to her. “Let’s go. I’ll walk you to the door.”

  “I can’t leave—”

  “Well, you’re not staying. You’re sick and talking nonsense. The girls don’t need your germs, literally and figuratively.”

  “It’s not nonsense,” she fussed, but she slipped into her coat and followed Anne out of the gym and across the commons. An overwhelming sense struck her: She wanted to cling to her mother. Annie was the next best option.

  Anne stopped, her hand on the door leading to the parking lot, and turned. “Britte, tell me what’s wrong.”

  “Joel’s going to leave.” Chilled now, she shivered. “And I can’t catch my breath.”

  “You’re sick and overreacting.”

  “He was dishonorably discharged from the Marines! When people hear that—”

  “You know people have heard that. What difference does it make? We know what he’s made of. He’s proven himself here.”

  “Annie, we spent last night together, too, not just Saturday night.”