by E M Lindsey
“What did he do?” Adrian asked quietly.
Noah felt his cheeks heat up and prickle with a little panic. He recalled Charlie’s threat rather viciously, which was exactly why he’d kept his mouth shut after his drunken rambling the afternoon Ryan had found him halfway into a bottle of Jack. Once he’d sobered up, he’d begged Ryan to say nothing, and though it seemed to kill his friend to do it, he agreed.
“Nothing big,” Noah said eventually.
Adrian scoffed, shaking his head. “Bullshit, Noah. He was trying to have me thrown out of school for plagiarism. There’s no way he would have backed off unless you gave him something he really wanted.”
Noah bowed his head and clenched his teeth together. “He wanted me to…” Licking his lips, he looked up and met Adrian’s gaze. “Promise me you won’t try to do anything about this, okay? Because trust me, what he was asking for, I was happy to give him if it meant getting you off the hook. And it’s already done.”
Adrian’s hand tightened on his, and after an agonizing moment of silence, he nodded. “Fine.”
Noah swallowed and glanced over to where Maggie was playing. “He wanted my pride.”
Adrian’s fingers twitched against his, then he tugged on Noah until the other man glanced over. “What the hell does that mean?”
Dragging his free hand down his face, Noah let out a ragged sigh. “He wanted me to tell my boss that he was right, that I wasn’t competent enough to hold all those classes, and I had to relinquish everything but my Greek classes to him. He agreed to back off if I made a production out of telling him my injury made me unfit to work full time.”
“Noah,” Adrian said, the word coming out in an angry hiss. He pulled his hand away and made like he was going to stand, so Noah grabbed him by the front of his shirt and hauled him down.
“You promised,” Noah reminded him. “And like I said, it wasn’t a price I couldn’t afford.”
“He just took your job,” Adrian spat.
Noah shrugged. “Lowe has been gunning for my job since my accident. Charlie knew that and he just decided that my humiliation was enough for him. It’s done, okay? I resigned the classes, Lowe was happy, Charlie backed off and we…”
Adrian gave him a flat look. “And we still can’t be together because I’m still a student and you’re still a professor. And we still can’t be together because if that asshole even suspects something is going on, he’ll ask for more.”
Noah squeezed his eyelids tight and tried to breathe through the tension in his shoulders. “Sixteen weeks, Adrian.”
“I’m not the kind of man who lets someone else control my life. Not like that,” Adrian told him, his voice low and dangerous. “I have no problem backing off because it’s a university policy and I understand it. It protects people from being taken advantage of, and I won’t spit in the face of that. But you’re asking me to let this guy hold me by the balls, Noah. You’re asking me to stay silent and let him do whatever the fuck he wants to you or me simply because he can. He’s a sick fuck and I can’t just do nothing.”
Noah licked his lips. “If you think this is easy for me…”
Adrian opened his mouth, but right then the café worker dropped off their food, giving them a look, which told Noah they hadn’t been as quiet as they meant to be. Adrian snatched the cut up PB&J from the tray, spilled a few carrot sticks off to the side, and set it in front of an empty chair.
“I don’t think this is easy for you,” he said gruffly. “And I’m not asking you to put yourself in further danger. But I am asking you to let me try and work another way around this. I’m more capable than you think.”
Noah laughed quietly. “If you think I don’t know exactly what you could do to him, you don’t know me very well at all.” He pulled the plastic dome off his salad, then stopped and reached out to cup Adrian’s cheek. “Let’s talk about it. When we get away together, let’s talk about it. I don’t want to live the next sixteen weeks in fear of what Charlie might do, and I refuse to let you live that way either.”
Adrian shook his head, but his expression softened at Noah’s touch. “You got me all wrong if you think I’ll ever be scared of that bastard. I just need to find a way to make him understand that.” Then he turned his head and called to Maggie. “Come eat, baby girl. Then we can go feed the stingrays.”
***
Adrian set his chair in the corner of the stingray pool room and ordered Lemon to lay down next to it, then helped prop Maggie on the side of the pool so he could help her feed them with the little tray of shrimp. He enjoyed watching her laugh and yank her hand away every time one of their soft bellies swam up against her hand, but more than that, he enjoyed the way Noah was pressed against his side, gently easing Maggie’s hand down into the water to help her with the task. It felt…domestic. It felt nice, and warm, and everything it should have felt. It let him, only for a moment, forget how fucked it all was.
By the time the little tray was empty, Maggie was starting to lag a little and Adrian could tell it was time to make the journey back home. He hadn’t anticipated a day like this, one he’d intended to have several weeks ago before plans were cancelled, and they were never able to get back on their feet again. What he wanted more than anything was a promise that there was normalcy, that this would eventually end, and they’d all be okay.
What he wanted more than anything was to get Charlie Barnes on his knees, a little battered, a little bloody, begging for forgiveness.
Adrian never claimed to be a particularly nice man, he just loved fiercely. And maybe it wasn’t love with Noah yet, but he could feel the stirrings of something big, something gorgeous, if only the universe would allow it. He was tired, he was frustrated, he was often overcome with the belief he didn’t deserve nice things. But he was also bound and fucking determined to see this through. Noah wasn’t giving up, and Adrian wouldn’t let him fight alone.
“So, is your brother still here?” Adrian asked as they headed for the exit.
Noah flushed, rubbing the back of his neck the way he did when he was nervous. “N-no,” he started, then licked his lips to calm his stammer. “No. I told him I could catch a ride back with a…friend.”
Adrian sank his teeth into his lower lip, glancing over to where Maggie was holding one of Noah’s hands in hers, and the leash in his other. Lemon trotted between them, and Adrian couldn’t help his smile. “A friend is more than happy to give you a ride.”
“You can drop me at Ryan’s,” Noah said after helping Maggie climb inside the back seat. He strapped her into her booster chair as Adrian disassembled his wheels and stowed the chair in the back. “I haven’t heard from Charlie, but my apartment…”
“I get it,” Adrian said, and though it irritated him a little, he actually liked Ryan and trusted there was no actual competition there. He motioned for Noah to get in the car, then started it up and pulled out onto the road. Days like this, he wished he could be on his trike. His anxiety was like a slow, quiet burn in his gut, a promise of a rough night, and an open-road journey would have done wonders.
But at the same time, he wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere else but in that car with two people he adored and the dog who, more often than not, saved him from himself. He tapped his fingers on the wheel, then looked into the mirror to find Maggie had immediately fallen asleep.
Noah turned his head to look back, then laughed quietly. “God, I wish I could do that.”
“Me too,” Adrian agreed. “Even when shit isn’t going off the rails, I could never sleep like that.” He sighed, pulling onto the freeway, staring at the mostly empty stretch of road that would lead them back to the chaos that was their life. “I got to know Ryan a little bit,” he said after some time.
Instead of looking surprised, Noah just smiled. “Yeah. He showed up at my place looking more relaxed than I’d seen him in a long time, sporting a pretty nice bruise on his cheek.”
Adrian flushed a little, shrugging. “He asked for it.”
/> “I have no doubt. It was a rough day. He caught me drunk off my ass and babbling like a moron. I think I puked on his shoes, too, but he hasn’t given me shit about it so it must have been awful.” Noah ran a hand down his face, then raked his fingers through his hair. “He likes you too, for what it’s worth.”
“You care about his opinion, so it’s worth a decent amount,” Adrian answered simply, because it was the truth. “I figured I’d hate the guy who cheated on you and fucked you over, but I couldn’t. I tried.”
Noah laughed softly and laid his head against the seat, turning his head so he could see Adrian properly. “He kind of does that to you. I’ve wondered for a long time why he hasn’t been able to settle down, but I think he’d been punishing himself for the idiot he was in law school. We kind of went back and forth about it the other day and I’m hoping he can forgive himself because I’m over it.”
“Yeah?” Adrian asked. He’d had a handful of relationships here and there, none of them ended particularly well, but they didn’t end in cheating, either. He wasn’t entirely sure he would be capable of forgiveness the way Noah was.
For his part, Noah just shrugged. “It’s not worth it to hold on to a grudge. I got a good friend out of it, and thanks to him being a dipshit, I was able to eventually meet you. Things aren’t great right now, but you’re worth the fight.”
Adrian felt affection and warmth blossoming in his gut. It didn’t erase the anxiety, but for a moment, it eclipsed it and he was grateful for that reprieve. “So are you, babe,” he managed.
Noah reached over and stroked his hand along the back of Adrian’s malformed ear. He felt more than heard when Noah jostled his hearing aid, then shivered when he felt blunt nails drag along his scalp. His hair was long enough to cover the bald patches from the scar tissue, but when Noah’s fingers brushed along them, he felt the sensitive tingles right down to his toes.
“I’d like a week. I know you have the garage so if you can’t get away that long, I’ll understand. But what I want is a full week of just you.”
Adrian glanced over at him and couldn’t hide his smile. “I will do everything in my power.”
17.
“Your boy just texted.”
Noah looked up from his laptop as Ryan walked into the room, holding his phone out like an offering. Noah sighed and made a grab for it, but Ryan yanked it away at the last second and collapsed on the couch a space away from him, grinning. “Asshole,” Noah muttered.
Ryan shrugged, unrepentant. “He says you’re good to go on Saturday, but you have to be out by Thursday because Wes’ parents are using the place that weekend. He wants to leave at two am which frankly I think is a crime against humanity and you should just let me go beat Charlie unconscious so you can get out of town that way.”
Noah sighed, leaning back with his arms crossed. “I haven’t seen or heard from Charlie since I put in the class resignation. I don’t think he’s watching right now, but Adrian wants to be safe and I don’t blame him.” Noah rubbed at his blind eye, fixing his other on Ryan’s face. “I’m worried he’s going to think you and I are together.”
Ryan frowned. “Why does that worry you. Shit, you’d think that would be a good thing considering he can’t come after me for anything.”
Noah shrugged. “Because I’m afraid if he thinks I’m with anyone he’s going to do…try something else. Something new. I think he wants me alone and miserable.”
Ryan set his phone down and grabbed Noah’s wrist, pulling him over until Noah was plastered against his side. “I have never known you to run scared from anything. Ever. And this guy is a bastard and he might have balls the size of the Liberty Bell, but he can’t control you forever. What more can he do?”
Noah shrugged. “I don’t know. That’s what scares me.”
“We’re going to end this, you know. I’ve been hanging out at the gym lately…”
Noah’s head snapped up and he fixed his gaze hard on Ryan. “I fucking told you to leave Wes and Anna alone.”
Ryan rolled his eyes. “Honestly, they’ve more than hinted they’re open to a third person getting involved. But they want commitment and that’s more than I can give right now. Plus, there’s this cute as shit boxer girl—like barely five foot, want to put her in my pocket and carry her around so adorable—and I think there’s something going on there with her and them. So no, Noah, I’m not getting involved, thank you very much.”
Noah’s eyebrows rose, feeling a little hurt and frustrated that he wasn’t in on this stuff. He’d been too afraid to show his face at the gym since the Charlie thing started, and he was missing out. “Fine. So what, you’ve been trying to scam on my boyfriend?”
Ryan looked hurt and Noah realized how sensitive this topic might actually be. Before he could open his mouth, Ryan put a finger against it. “It’s fine. I mean, it stung, but I know you know I’m not going to do anything to hurt you. And as it happens, I’ve been helping that gorgeous boyfriend of yours train one of his guys. I think you might have met him once. Cole?”
“The blind guy?” Noah asked, startled by that revelation.
Ryan nodded. “He’s been working toward taking on sighted opponents and since I’m basically the worst still, he’s starting with me. He hasn’t seriously kicked my ass…yet. But,” he said, and hesitated for a moment, “he’s also got some serious computer skills. He was in some sort of technological espionage training or something in the British military and he’s got scary skills. Like so good that once he’s cleared to go back to work, he’ll be listed as an active-duty member.”
Noah blinked. “So, does that mean he’s going back to England?”
Ryan looked momentarily hurt by the thought, and Noah was slammed with the realization that it was more than just boxing training, even if Ryan wasn’t ready to admit it. “He didn’t say, but he made it sound like he was here for a while. Maybe even for good. Anyway, I haven’t told him anything about our situation, but he knows something is going on and he offered to help. We might want to consider it.”
Noah sighed, pulling himself up and rubbing at his face. “I don’t know. There’s not a lot we can accomplish with illegal hacking. And Charlie can still get me fired and Adrian kicked out for what we did.”
“Are doing,” Ryan pointed out.
Noah rolled his eyes. “Thank you.”
Ryan shrugged. “It’s my job to be frank about it. And yes, that’s true, he can. But if he’s determined to take you down, take him with you. This ends somewhere and I bet my left nut Cole can find some deeply dark shit on him.”
Noah pulled his bottom lip between his teeth, then finally nodded. He really had little else to lose. “Okay. I mean…not okay. Let me think about it and talk to Adrian first. If we can come to some sort of agreement, I’ll let you know.”
Ryan gave him a look, then smirked. “I don’t think you’ll have any trouble there.”
***
He was packed. He was packed, and ready to go, and all he needed to do was sleep one more night, then settle in at Ryan’s until Adrian picked him up. Yes, it was absurd they were stealing away in the middle of the night just for a week alone without a risk of Noah’s damn blackmailer finding out, but he would take it.
Mostly because there was some promise on the horizon that this might end, that they might get something on Charlie bad enough it would even the playing field. Noah needed to sit and contemplate what he might do with his freedom after that, though he knew getting his job back would be next to impossible. He’d given Lowe all he needed to bar him from becoming full-time again, or from getting tenure at this university. Short of coming in with evidence to prove that Charlie had blackmailed and coerced him into resigning those classes, there was nothing he could say to the head of the department that would make the old bigot change his mind.
And in all honesty, Noah wasn’t sure he wanted to go back to working for them. There was another major University an hour and a half south of them and though it would be a co
mmute, it was one he’d willingly take on if it meant freedom from this mess. Maybe their department would be stable, maybe tenure was achievable, maybe the prejudice wouldn’t follow him there.
He didn’t know how likely any of that was, but he could hope. He had to think beyond his immediate life. He’d never ask Adrian to pack up and move, but he still had options that didn’t tie him to one place forever.
With a sigh, Noah decided to run out and grab a quick bite to eat. He didn’t think sleep would come easy, so at the very least he could grab some comfort food to get him through the long night. It was a Friday night and since the campus was mostly deserted, it would be easy for him to pop in and out and get back home in time to put his feet up and chill.
At the door, he grabbed his cane and shoved it into his pocket, then headed out for the curry shop a few blocks away from him. He was happy to see the lobby empty and was greeted immediately by a tired looking server at the counter. “What can I get you?”
“Spicy shrimp Malabar,” he said, eyeing the dairy-free options on the menu. “Extra rice, and some roti, no butter.” He handed over his card, then moved to the window seat to wait. It was always a little eerie over winter break. Only a handful of students bothered with the short winter term, and since it was all online classes, most of them went home to do it. The dorm buildings were dark, half the bars and shops had closed early, and most of the people around were locals walking their dogs or hoping to grab a drink while the streets were calm.
The food was ready quickly, so Noah slipped a few bills into the tip jar, grabbed his bag, and headed out. He was a few feet away, standing at the mouth of the building’s alley when his phone began to buzz in his pocket. Thinking it might be Ryan with a message from Adrian, he turned his back to the street and peered down at the screen.