Her Bear Protector Trilogy

by Bonnie Burrows

  "I'll just do like Kyla. If the...if the sounds get to be too much, I'll just cover my ears. I'm not going to be the only one to hide in the cabins."

  Finally Calvin relented, and he and Emily joined everyone sitting on logs around the fire pit. Emily sat down next to me and gave my hand a little squeeze.

  I squeezed hers back. "I know whatever Aaron's doing, he has a reason for it."

  She nodded, tucking a strand of her long red hair behind one ear. "I know. Whatever he's going to do, it's for our safety. But I just don't...." She shook her head. "No. He knows what he's doing."

  Everyone sat in silence for a little while. Samuel got up and started a fire in the pit, saying that at least we shouldn't wait in the dark.

  "And maybe the pop and crackle of the logs will help cover any sounds so you ladies won't have to hear them."

  I wasn't quite so sure. I wasn't sure if the crackling of a bonfire could smother sounds of a man's chest being cut open while he was still alive. I wasn't sure if the sound of a bonfire could muffle screams. I looked into the roaring fire, telling myself over and over that Aaron knew what he was doing. I knew he wasn't a cruel or unfair man, and in fact, I knew him to be exactly the opposite. I wondered what information he had that the rest of us didn't, because I was sure he had to have some in order to do what he was about to do. I wondered if the rest of us had missed any signs or clues indicating that Victor was just as evil as his brothers. I wondered if I should just go into Aaron's and my cabin and bury my head under a pillow. But since Emily, Jasmine, and Sarah were staying, I decided I would, too. Even if the sounds of Victor being killed became too horrible for them to handle, they had their husbands to hold them and cover their ears, and I didn't. Because my boyfriend would be the one doing the killing.

  My palms began to sweat, and I wiped them on my jeans.

  Suddenly, Emily turned to me. "Do you want to go hang out in my cabin?"

  "Yes."

  We both stood, but at that moment, Aaron emerged from the cabin. We both sat back down. He strode over to the fire, his expression unreadable, sat down beside me, and took my hand. I noticed his white t-shirt and jeans didn't have a single drop of blood on them. His hands were clean, too.

  Samuel finished adding a few extra logs to the fire and sat back down. "How did you...how was it silent?"

  Aaron shook his head. "He's still alive."

  Emily looked around me to Aaron. "Then why did you-"

  "He just needed to be scared out of his mind for a moment. He just needed to understand that I can and will kill him if he breaks our agreement to coexist in peace. Which, I ultimately told him, I may allow to happen. But first, I wanted input from you all. Does anyone not agree that this should be allowed to happen?"

  Nobody spoke.

  "All right, then, everyone say I who thinks Victor should be allowed to coexist with us in the wilds, providing he agrees to a few ground rules."

  Everyone said I, several people immediately. I said I, but I was one of those in the group who didn't say it right away. I hadn't wanted Victor to die, but I wasn't exactly crazy about him living nearby, either. I hoped that the ground rules Aaron had in mind were some pretty firm ones. Like, that Victor was not to go near any of us at any time. I was sure that this was unfeeling and cold, especially since he'd just lost his entire family, evil murderers and rapists though they were, but there was just something about him I didn't trust and didn't like. And the feeling had intensified, not decreased, the entire time I'd been near him in the meeting cabin.

  Almost as if reading my mind, Emily asked Aaron what some of the ground rules would be. "I mean, I really didn't want him to die, but please tell me one of the ground rules is going to be that he can't go near any of us, for any reason, at any time."

  It was stuff like this was the reason why Emily was my new best friend. Sometimes we thought so much alike it was scary.

  Aaron cleared his throat. "Yes, that will actually be one of the ground rules, at least for several decades, until he can earn our trust. He will not be allowed to approach any of us or initiate contact. If he sees one of us, he is to turn and head in the other direction. He'll also be expected to build a shelter and spend most of his time in the eastern corner of the immortality bounds. Which will mean out of sight for most of the time, although not out of mind. I'll be keeping a very close watch on his activities, especially at first. And I know many of you will help me with this. He'll also not be allowed to go into Houghton unsupervised for many years, just on the chance that he has or develops any criminal tendencies like his brothers had. If he wants to go into town, he'll have to have at least two of us escort him. We won't take any chances that any of the people of Houghton will be hurt. So...." Aaron took a deep breath, firelight reflected in his deep green eyes. "Does all of this seem agreeable to everyone?"

  Everyone said yes, including me.

  Seth nodded. "This all sounds like something we can live with. Although...." He shook his head, sighing. "Something is just off about all this. I just do not trust him. But that being said, I guess he did make some good points in there. He was one of the wolves that we did seem to get along with best. He wasn't one of the ones who committed the rapes and murders. He didn't badly injure any of us in the fight. And it does make sense that he probably wouldn't even dare break any of the ground rules, because like he said, with only a weakened one of him, and ten of us shifters, still at full strength, he knows that would mean certain death. No, he probably will stick to the ground rules like glue. Why would he throw immortality away? The only way I could see it happening is if he just couldn't stop himself from committing some crime, but he's always seemed too controlled, too measured somehow, for that, and he seems the same way now. He knows what the stakes are. He wants to live forever. He's not stupid, either. He knows you're not playing around, Aaron. No, I think he'll stick to the ground rules like glue. Can't say I'll ever completely trust him, but I guess I can trust him to serve his own self-interest and desire to live forever."

  Aaron nodded. "I feel the same way. Does anyone else have any thoughts they'd like to share?"

  Jasmine moved her long, glossy braids from one shoulder to the other. "I think we're doing the right thing, here. I believe that everyone deserves a second chance. And if Victor ever blows it, that's his problem, not ours. As long as he knows the consequences crystal-clear beforehand, that's on him. But as for us, we're showing compassion and kindness. We're showing what our family is made of. I'm proud to be a member of this family every day, but I especially am tonight."

  Several people chimed in echoing her thoughts, and Aaron asked if anyone had anything more to add.

  Seth stared into the fire, the glow from it making his dark sandy hair appear gold. "I guess it still just strikes me as strange that I've been hearing all the wolves' voices these past two months, no matter if it's infrequent, and no matter if it's only a word or two at a time. It still just strikes me as odd. Those other wolves are dead. We buried them. I've been back out to the clearing a few times since then, just to poke around a little, and the wolves are still buried there. Still dead. So why...." He gave his head a little shake, still staring into the fire. "I know there's no point in even asking the question, because I know none of us knows why. But it still just seems strange to me. Although, I realize now that when I heard a fragment of thought in Victor's voice, it was actually Victor." Seth looked up at Emily. "And I know like you said, Emily, the other wolves' voices could just be some sort of energy residue. I guess it's completely possible. I just don't like it. But that doesn't mean that I think letting Victor live and share immortality with us is the wrong decision. I think it's the right one. It's compassionate and kind, like Jasmine said, and that reflects what our family's about and what we believe in. I, too, am especially proud to be a part of this family tonight. I'm proud to have a leader like Aaron."

  Aaron nodded once and thanked Seth. "And I'm proud to have family like all of you." He put his arm around me. "And that ve
ry much includes you, too."

  He asked if anyone had any additional thoughts, and when no one did, he asked if anyone would be willing to guard Victor overnight. "I'm going have another little talk with him in the morning, but until then, I think he should be watched, and watched closely."

  Samuel and Cole both said they'd take guard duty, and Aaron thanked them. "And thank you all for standing behind me and trusting my judgment tonight. I'm grateful for the support of each and every one of you."

  Soon, Emily said she was tired and she and Calvin went off to their cabin. Aaron and I followed suit not long after.

  Once we were snuggled up in bed, I asked him if he really thought everything with allowing Victor back into the wilds would be okay. "I trust your judgment, but I just need to hear you say it."

  He pulled me closer and brushed a kiss against my mouth. "Everything will be okay. I'll make sure of it. Although, and I hope you don't mind, but I probably won't be able to let you out of my sight much for the next few weeks, until Victor gets settled in. Either I'll have an eye on him, or an eye on you, but it'll be one or the other every minute of the day for the near future. I just can't take a chance, however slight, that you could be hurt."

  "I understand. And spending even more time with you is something I don't mind at all."

  It was so true. It was getting to the point that any time I'd spend more than an hour or two away from Aaron, I'd actually develop a real, physical ache in my chest just thinking about him. Just missing him.

  He brushed another kiss against my mouth and began smoothing my hair, something he knew I loved before going to sleep. But despite the soothing sensation combined with the security of being wrapped in his strong arms, several minutes later, I still felt wide awake.

  I opened my eyes. "Aaron? I don't even know how to say this, but I just have a gut feeling that this Victor guy is being dishonest somehow. And I don't even have a clue about what. I know what Seth said is true...that it just doesn't make any sense for Victor to break any of the ground rules about staying here, because why would he want to get himself killed and give up immortality? But even with that...." I paused, trying to articulate exactly why I thought Victor was hiding something. But I couldn't. "I just have a really bad gut feeling. My intuition is trying to tell me something, I guess, but I just don't know what it is."

  Aaron planted a kiss on my forehead. "I think it's very understandable that you'd have a bad feeling about all this. Victor comes across as sneaky and slimy. But Seth was right. We have to consider what Victor has to gain by toeing the line, and what he stands to lose if he doesn't. And because of that, I truly believe that everything will be okay. If I didn't believe that, I really would have killed him in the cabin to keep you, the rest of the family, and everybody in Houghton, safe. I don't believe he's one hundred percent trustworthy. But I do trust his sense of self-preservation. So it's okay that you don't trust him as an individual. You're definitely not alone in that. But you can trust me. You can trust the man who loves you to make sure that this will all work out smoothly."

  I nodded into the crook of Aaron's arm. "I do trust you. I know everything will be okay."

  He continued stroking my hair, and within a few minutes, I fell fast asleep.

  The next morning, he had a one-on-one talk with Victor, explaining the rules if he was to stay within the immortality boundaries. Afterward, Aaron reported that Victor understood all the rules crystal-clear and was more than happy and grateful to comply with them.

  "And he also understands perfectly what will happen if he doesn't. Not only will he not have eternal life, he'll have no life, period, as I will take him out swiftly and without mercy if he makes any attempt to throw our kindness back in our faces by pulling any sort of stunt."

  It was agreed that Aaron, Calvin, and Samuel would escort Victor to the eastern corner of the immortality bounds, bringing along some wood planking, tools, and supplies he'd need to build a shelter.

  Samuel finished loading some of the supplies into a cart, took a thin loop of leather from his pocket, and began tying his shoulder-length brown hair back in a ponytail. "I'll haul this stuff, fine, but I am not helping him build his shack. He's lucky enough we're letting him stay here."

  Soon Aaron, Samuel, and Calvin left with Victor, but not before Victor shot me a glance, his dark eyes glittering, that made a chill dance along my spine. Although I didn't know exactly why. It had just been a glance, and glittering seemed to be the natural state of his eyes. It had been so fast, I didn't even think Aaron had seen it. But Emily had.

  She sidled up next to me, watching the group of four men making their way down the trail. "That little micro-glance he just gave you...I didn't like that. I don't even know why. But I did not like that."

  I rubbed my arms, which were suddenly covered in goose bumps, despite the warmth of the sunny July day. "Me neither. And same as you...I don't even know why. But something just tells me...." I chewed my lip a few moments. "I just have this feeling of intuition...and I wish Aaron would trust me about it a little more."

  Later that morning, after having a few cups of coffee with Jasmine and Sarah, Emily and I sat in her pottery studio. We'd decided to both do a little work instead of stewing about the whole Victor thing. Emily sat at a table painting a bouquet of bright yellow tulips on a cream-colored vase. I stood nearby, paintbrush and palette at the ready, studying a blank white canvas, trying to decide what to paint. But all I could think about was the funny little glance Victor had given me. And his dark, glittering eyes.

  Eventually, I set down my paintbrush and palette. "Not feeling the painting at all right now. I think I'm just gonna do some sketches today."

  I got a sketchpad and pencil from a shelf, sat down at the table, and began to sketch. But before long, a circle I intended to be a sun became an eye. And before I even realized what I was doing, it had a mate. Dark and glittering, the eyes stared back at me.

  I set the pencil down, sighing. "I give up. Art is not for me today."

  Just then, Seth stuck his head around the open doorway and knocked. "Anyone home?"

  Emily told him to come in, and he sauntered inside the studio and took a seat at the table with us.

  "You ladies mind if I keep you company in here for a while?"

  Emily looked up from her vase, the corners of her mouth twitching with a smile. "Not at all, but what's got you so social all of a sudden? You've been in here, what? Exactly one time? And I do believe that was when Sarah, Jasmine, and I dragged you in here to show you your birthday present on your actual birthday even though it was still drying."

  Seth shrugged, rolling his eyes, a little smile playing along the corners of his own mouth. "Can't a guy just wake up and decide he'd like to hang out in a pottery studio one day?"

  Emily set her paintbrush down, her bright green eyes twinkling. "No. And especially not when he could be hunting. So why don't you tell us what's up."

  His expression suddenly serious, he raked a hand through his sandy blond hair. "Well, I don't know. I tried going out hunting for a little while, but this whole thing with Victor just kept...nagging at me. So I just figured maybe if I had some company, had some conversations about things that weren't about him, maybe I could shake it off and focus on something else. At least for a little while. Because I know Aaron's got everything under control, and there's no sense in me spending the whole day with this...." He raked a hand through his hair again. "This strange nagging feeling. This feeling that I just can't shake, no matter how hard I try to talk myself out of it, that there is just something not aboveboard with Victor. And I know, I know...it wouldn't make sense for him to pull anything because he knows Aaron can and will kill him. Instantly. I said all that myself last night. But still...."

  Seth raked a hand through his hair yet again and didn't seem like he was going to continue.

  I sighed. "The three of us are having the same type of intuition about not trusting Victor. And it doesn't make sense, given what you just said, Seth
, about it being counter intuitive to Victor's own goal to have him pull anything. Not only does he not want to be killed by Aaron, he wants to live forever. So why are we all feeling so weird about this? And I know you guys don't know, either; I'm just mystified. And a little just...anxious."

  "Me, too." Emily turned her gaze from me to Seth. "And I'd be lying if I said I didn't desperately wish you could still hear Victor's thoughts, Seth. Not that it's your fault. I guess it's just his weakened state or whatever."

  "Yeah. It's hard to feel like it's not my fault, though. After having this ability for so many years now, it's hard not to feel like I just don't have 'hearing' block or something, just like writers get when they're trying so hard but the words just aren't coming. And believe me, I have been trying and trying. I've been trying so hard the past few weeks, it's basically been all I've been able to focus on. And then last night, I tried 'listening' to his thoughts so hard I gave myself a headache. Barely slept a wink."

  Nobody spoke for a few moments. I sighed and closed my sketchbook, wishing that Seth's efforts to cure his 'hearing' block had worked. But suddenly, I had an idea. I gasped.

  "Seth. It doesn't matter that Victor's weakened. There's still a way that you can increase your 'hearing' of his thoughts. We'll be able to tell exactly what he's thinking. We'll be able to learn exactly what he's up to. Oh my gosh...I can't believe I didn't think of this sooner."

  CHAPTER FIVE

  About an hour later, Seth, Emily, and I stood on the stony shore of a little lake about a mile north of the cabin settlement.

  Seth, clad in swim trunks, looked out onto the lake, frowning. "Tell me again how drowning myself at the bottom of the lake is supposed to help me hear Victor's thoughts better?"

  I rolled my eyes. "You don't need to 'drown' yourself. You just need to go underneath the water deep enough so that everything is quiet. And then when you feel like breathing, whether that's after one second or one minute, you come up and breathe. For however long you want. And then go back down. And repeat, repeat, repeat. Up to a hundred times if you want. It's a form of meditation. And trust me, it works. A couple of years ago, I had 'painter's block' so bad I didn't paint for two months. No clue why. And it didn't even matter why. I just couldn't. I'd try so, so, hard. I'd stand in front of a blank canvas practically all day. Just wracking my brain trying to think of what to paint. Where to put the first stroke. What combinations of colors to use. But I was still paralyzed. I nearly drove myself nuts. And then one of my artist friends told me about this. She said I should try water meditation. Said if I completely and totally freed my mind of any and all thoughts relating to painting, then I could 'hear' the little voice in my mind telling me what I needed to paint again. And it would seem effortless and easy to hear the little voice and be certain about it. So I asked a different friend who lived in the suburbs if I could use her pool for a week. But it didn't even take that long. One session. And I could hear my little 'painter's voice' again. The next day, I did two paintings. So I know it works. And I think it could work for you with 'hearing' Victor's voice. And it may seem like apples and oranges compared to what I was struggling with, but I think our struggles are essentially the same. You're trying too hard. You need to completely let go and clear your mind. Victor may be weakened, but you're not. I think if you can just stop trying so hard, you'll just naturally be able to hear his thoughts better, no matter what his own condition is. So. Will you give it a try?"