"Too late," I replied unapologetically and put my hands on her hips, pushing my pelvis against hers and showing her how aroused I was already. I reached up and brushed her soft loose curls off of her neck and pressed a kiss there, using just enough teeth to pull a gasp out of Natalie.
"Stop that," she warned me, but didn't move or do anything else to stop me.
"Is that what you really want me to do?" I whispered against her warm skin.
She let me trail more kisses up to her ear before speaking. "Yes." She sighed with regret. I lifted my head and looked into her eyes. Her smile was warm and affectionate as her hands came up to cradle my face. She pulled me toward her for a gentle, yet passionate kiss that made my cock twitch. My hands tightened on her hips, and I had to fight the urge to drag her to my bed.
"Alright; you siren," I grumbled as I took a step back. "We need to go."
"I'll drive," she offered. "That way you can drink if you want to. It's your friends' wedding after all."
"Okay," I said, thinking about being able to stare at her all the way there. I imagined her long toned legs would look amazing while she was driving.
A little while later I was staring at her legs while she drove her red Passat. I had been right about her legs, and I was itching to run my hands up them.
"I'm so glad you came over last night," she said with a soft smile.
"Me too," I smiled back, but my mind immediately focused on my failure last night. Andy's pep talk didn't help at all. I had been so positive when I left the club that I could tell her the truth, but I was starting to think I'd never be able. Despair fell over me, and I felt my smile slip away. I looked out the passenger window, so she couldn't see my face. Maybe Andy was right. Maybe I was subconsciously pushing her away. That's what all the pointless sex with random women had been after all, a way to keep myself from getting emotionally involved with anyone again. Had it been so long that I wasn't able to be close to any woman anymore? I suddenly felt ill. The thought of losing Natalie filled me with grief. Was it inevitable now?
"Are you alright?" she asked me, breaking me out of my melancholy musings.
"I'm fine." I managed to give her a convincing smile. "I'm still a little hung over from last night." She reached over and put her hand on my thigh, giving me a gentle squeeze. I placed my hand on hers and held it firmly. I wasn't going to let it happen. I wasn't going to lose her or let myself push her away. I needed her.
We arrived at the church with only a few minutes to spare. The church was packed as we took our seats on the groom's side. Andy came in to stand at the front of the church, looking a lot livelier in his black tux than I thought he would be after last night. He didn't even look that nervous as he waited grinning from ear to ear. The processional music began, and the groomsman began walking the bridesmaids up the aisle, with Jensen escorting Sydney in last. The knee-length bridesmaids' dresses were a beautiful champagne color with three-quarter sleeves and soft lace. Sydney looked absolutely stunning, and I smirked as I noticed that Jensen couldn't keep his eyes off of his wife.
Finally, Lydia began walking up the aisle with her father. She was breathtaking in a floor-length lacy gown with a train trailing behind her. The long sleeves were sheer with bits of lace scattered down her arms. It had a deep plunging neck line that showed off her lovely collar bones and the perfect amount of cleavage without crossing the line into impropriety. Her fiery red hair was pulled away from her face with waves cascading down her back. Instead of a veil, she wore small white flowers in her hair fashioned into a headband.
I glanced to the front of the church to catch Andy's reaction to his future wife. I had never seen such a look of love and devotion on Andy's face before. You could see his love for this woman shining from his eyes. I suddenly felt a deep pain clench up inside my chest as I couldn't help thinking about the wedding that I had never had with Paige. This was the first one I had been to since my broken engagement, and my reaction caught me off guard. I didn't think going to someone else's wedding would affect me like this.
Natalie squeezed my hand at that moment, and I looked over to see her staring at me with sympathy and concern in her eyes. She instinctively knew how hard this was for me. I gave her a wan smile of gratitude and put my other hand on top of hers.
I spent the rest of the ceremony clutching Natalie's hand and trying to ignore the ache twisting inside me, my jaw clenching painfully. I missed most of the ceremony, and if I hadn't been lost in my own head, I would have felt bad about it. As it was, I was relieved when it was finally over, and we could go outside.
We waited in the crowd by the church entrance for the new couple to emerge. Everyone, including Natalie and me, had little bags of birdseed to throw at them. Natalie wrapped her arms around my waist as we waited, her eyes still filled with concern as she looked at me.
"Are you okay?" she asked quietly.
I shook my head as I let out a sigh and put an arm around her shoulders. "I didn't think this was going to bother me this much. I'm sorry."
"Why are you sorry?" she asked with a tilt of her head.
"I wanted you to have a good time today, not worry about me the whole time."
"I'm not upset about it," she told me matter-of-factly. "I care about you, worrying about you is kind of my job now." She smiled softly and kissed my cheek.
"Thank you," I told her sincerely. "I don't think I could have gotten through it alone."
"You're welcome, David."
Just then Andy and Lydia came through the doors to the sounds of applause and shouting. The crowd covered them liberally with birdseed and hastened their steps to the limo waiting by the curb to take them to their reception. That was my cue to get the hell out of here. I grabbed Natalie's hand and led her to the car. I hoped that the reception didn't bother me as much as the actual wedding had already.
The reception was at the downtown convention center that Natalie and I had been in last weekend, but was in one of the smaller ballrooms. Being here didn't seem to be bothering me so far, and I felt relieved about it. I didn't want to spend the whole night a basket case. I led Natalie to the table where Lauren, Sydney's sister, and her fiance, Adam, were seated. I introduced Natalie to them and couldn't help noticing the surprised look on Lauren's face when I called her my girlfriend.
We sat and chatted with them for a while, and I was feeling calm again. However, when the wedding party arrived, and I saw Andy and Lydia walk in looking happy and content, all the turmoil and pain came back with a vengeance. Natalie started rubbing my thigh soothingly under the table. I sat there in silence trying to regain control of myself when Natalie abruptly stood and looked down at me.
"Come on." She held her hand out to me expectantly.
I looked up at her in confusion. "Where are we going?"
"You'll see," she answered me with a wicked gleam in her eyes.
I knew that look. She was up to no good, and I wanted to be a part of it. I nodded and stood, taking her hand and letting her lead me from the ballroom. We ended up walking down an empty hallway, and stopped next to a door at the end. She looked around carefully then tried the knob. Her wicked grin widened as the door opened for her. She pulled me into an empty boardroom of some sort with a long table surrounded by dark leather office chairs. I stood watching her as she locked the door behind us then walked over to one of the chairs and pulled it out, facing it toward me.
"How about that lap dance you were talking about the other day?" she asked, her voice lowering seductively. "We'll have to make it quick though."
"I'd like that." I grinned at her, my cock already waking up and straining against my dress pants. I moved to the chair, undoing my button and zipper as I walked. I lowered them just enough for my cock to spring free then I sat on the cool leather. I watched Natalie as she stood in front of me, pulling her dress up and shimming her hips as she pushed her lace thong down her long legs. She leaned forward and tucked them into the front pocket of my suit jacket for safekeeping. All thoughts of
my pain and loss just evaporated as she hiked her dress up to her waist and straddled my lap, the already wet folds of her pussy pressing against the underside of my erection.
"I'm already soaking wet for you," she whispered in my ear then licked the outer edge of my earlobe, making me moan and shudder with desire. "I want you inside me." She thrust her hips forward, pushing her pelvic bone hard against my cock.
"Fuck, Natalie," I groaned. "The things you do to me."
"You haven't seen anything yet, David," she whispered as she rose up, took my cock in her hand, and slid me up to her swollen sex. She impaled herself on me in one thrust as she dropped down on me, making me snarl out a long line of swear words as her tight warmth engulfed me. Natalie began riding me hard and fast, her hands on my shoulders for support. I grabbed her hips in an almost bruising grip and helped her along, knowing we could get busted in here at anytime. I was determined that both of us would get off before that could happen.
Her back suddenly arched as she came, her pussy rippling and clenching around my dick. She clamped her mouth shut as she stifled a scream, her teeth biting into her lower lip. The sight was enough to send me over the edge. My body tensed and contorted as my orgasm let loose. I buried my face against her neck, letting out a long groan as I emptied myself inside her, the pleasure spiraling up and out of me in a rush.
When the moment passed, we sat there breathing heavily, our foreheads pressed together. I could feel my heart beating hard inside my chest, all my pain and worries gone for the moment. How did she always know what I needed?
"Feel better?" she asked me softly.
I gave her a slow lingering kiss before answering her. "I do, sweetheart. Thank you."
"Your welcome," she replied with an affectionate smile. "Anytime."
I helped her up off my lap and stood, both of us hastily putting ourselves back together. She went to take her panties from my pocket, and I grabbed her wrist to stop her. I shook my head at her with a hard stare. "That's mine now," I growled possessively. Her mouth twisted wryly, but she didn't argue about it.
"I'll leave first," she told me. "You wait five minutes or so then follow. We don't want anyone to suspect what we were up too."
"Alright." I nodded, even though I didn't care who knew, but I didn't want to embarrass her. I pulled her close to me for one more kiss, then reluctantly watched her leave the room; feeling our connection down deep in my bones. "I love you, Natalie," I whispered after she had walked out, startling myself as the words came out of me. Joy coursed through me. I said it. I said it out loud, and it had been easy. That had to be a good sign, didn't it? For the first time, I felt hope that the next time I tried to tell her I would succeed. In fact, it sounded like a great idea to tell her later tonight when we got home. I couldn't wait to see her face when I finally confessed my love to her.
I paced until my five minutes were up, then I cracked open the door and slipped into the still empty hallway. I made it out to the entryway and was just about to head back into the ballroom when a familiar laugh caught my attention. I stiffened in shock and turned toward the sound.
I saw a woman in a red dress standing several yards away with her back to me. I remembered that long neck, remembered how it felt in my hand. I recognized the warm dark chestnut hair that was pulled up on top of her head. I knew how the soft strands felt between my fingers. She laughed again, and my heart stuttered as pain and sorrow exploded inside me. It was Paige. She was here, and I was frozen in place. I couldn't fucking move.
She turned, as if she could feel my eyes on her. Her chocolate brown eyes landed on my face and widened as she recognized me. Her wide full lips parted in shock, and then discomfort and guilt flashed across her face. Her hands went to her abdomen, and the movement drew my attention downward. I felt my mouth drop open in shock as I stared at her swollen pregnant belly, and the pain twisted into me like a hot blade. It felt like a massive blow had slammed into me, and I gasped from the impact. My eyes landed on her left hand and there was a huge diamond engagement ring on her finger. A tall muscular blond man next to her put an arm around her possessively as he continued his conversation with another man, and didn't seem to notice me staring at his fiancee. His fucking fiancee. It was too much, all the pain and anger coalescing inside me. I couldn't take it, so I fled.
I found myself hurrying away from her and all the horror and pain seeing her had caused me. I had to get away. I had to get out of here. Now. I passed Sydney as she was coming out of the bathroom. Her smile faltered as she saw my face, but I ignored her as I hurried toward the exit.
"David!" she called out.
I could hear her heels clicking on the marble floor as she followed behind me.
"David!" she called again. "Where are you going?!"
I don't know how, but somehow Sydney caught up with me, just as I made it outside. She managed to grab my sleeve and stop me in my tracks on the sidewalk.
"What?!" I snarled out as I whirled around to face her. She actually shrank back a little. I had never talked to her like that before, but I was too messed up to care right now.
"Why are you leaving?" she asked with concern and confusion. "What happened?"
"Paige is fucking here," I growled. "She's here with her fucking fiance."
"Oh my God," she said. "Are you okay?"
"Do I look fucking okay?!" I was acting like an asshole, but I didn't care.
"Are you going to run away from this again?" she asked as her brows drew together with anger.
"So what if I am?" I panted out. "I can't stay here if she's here. I can't be in the same building with that monster of a woman."
"Monster?" she asked in confusion. "It was a broken engagement, David. It's not like she murdered anybody."
I squeezed my eyes closed at her choice of words and the truth just spilled out of my mouth. "She murdered my baby." The harsh words brought back every nuance of pain Paige had ever caused me.
"What?!" Sydney's eyes widened in utter shock.
I stared down at her, my eyes blazing. "Paige dumped me when she found out she was pregnant with my child. She had an abortion behind my back. I wouldn't have known about it at all until her doctor accidentally called me about a follow-up appointment. The only reason I found out was because I was worried that she was sick or something and called to ask her if she was okay. She confessed the whole thing to me over the fucking phone. Now she's here with her future fucking husband, and she's pregnant with his baby. Apparently, he's good enough to father a child with, but I'm fucking not." Pity filled Sydney's face, and I couldn't stomach it. I turned away, deciding that I'd flag down a cab to take me home. Thank God, Natalie drove her own car.
"David!" she called out again. "You can't just take off and leave Natalie here like this!"
I stopped again and turned back to look at her. My voice was monotone and emotionless now as I spoke. "I'm not good enough for her. I'm not good enough for anyone. I'm not good enough to be a husband or a father. She's better off without me." The bitter truth of my words burned like acid. I turned and walked away swiftly this time, ignoring Sydney shouting behind me. I climbed into the first cab I saw at the curb.
"Where too?" the cab driver asked as I settle into the seat. I met his eyes in the mirror.
"Just fucking drive," I snarled at him. His eyes widened, but he did as I told him and sped away from the convention center. I didn't look back once. I couldn't take that pity in Syd's eyes again. I should have never gone out with Natalie. I should have never taken the risk. I should have known I couldn't do it. I was destined to be alone. That was just the way it was. I hoped Natalie could forgive me and move on, because she had no future with me. No one did.
Thanks for reading my book. Get the next book in this trilogy, You Are My Love - Breathless Book 2. Buy it HERE. If you loved this book or any of my others, please leave a review on my Amazon author page, HERE. I'd really appreciate it.
S.W.
About the Author
Samantha
is a self-professed nerd from the Midwest, who loves anything with a good plot. She'll watch anything with werewolves, vampires, or zombies in it. She is a voracious reader and loves smutty romance novels and contemporary fantasy. Samantha started writing her first erotic romance in February of 2015, and now she can't stop. It's a passion that she can't shut off, nor would she want to. She loves animals, especially dogs, and if her husband let her, she'd have a dozen, but 2 are his limit. She's looking forward to sharing more of her books with the world.
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You Are My Air: Breathless Book 1 Page 24