The Hazed Series (New Edition)

by Brittany Butler

  “That’s the one,” she says.

  “Where’s the rest of it?” I ask, not impressed.

  “Very funny,” she says.

  She tears it from my hands and tosses it in the suitcase. Then walks back to the closet, with her arms folded across her chest, she leans into the door frame.

  “That was fast,” she says.

  I could cut the tension with a knife. Nervously, I rub the back of my neck. I don’t want to go back to the party, but I know I can’t stay in here. Drunk or not, she’s never been like this and I wonder if she’s had a change of heart.

  “Do you wanna go back out there?” I ask.

  She shakes her head, drops her hands, and walks slowly toward me. I wouldn’t describe myself as claustrophobic, but as I backed into the wall, I knew I needed to get the hell out of this small closet.

  “We probably should, Taylor, you’re drunk.”

  She plants her hands on her hips; she’s so stubborn. “No, I’m not.”

  “What made you change your mind?” I ask.

  She took another step toward me, and I looks away, searching for anything else to concentrate on. I lean against the wall behind me and stick my hands behind my back.

  “I could ask you the same,” she says.

  I shake my head. “I’ve never changed my mind about you.”

  “I heard everything you said the other night. You loved me, you wanted to change…Now you can’t get away from me fast enough.”

  I look down at her. The short dress stops mid-thigh and doesn’t leave much for the imagination on her chest. If we’re going to have a conversation, I need to wrap a jacket around her before continuing. I only have so much patience.

  “Believe me, it’s not because I don’t want to,” I say, frustrated.

  “Then what is it?”

  “Let’s say I gave into you, you wake up in the morning and you’re pissed at me. Everything I’ve been working on,” I snap my fingers, “Gone. Just like that. I’m not taking that chance.”

  “And what if we wake up in the morning and everything is better than ever?” She ask, chewing on her lip.

  “No.”

  She places her hand on my stomach, closing what little space we have between us. With heels on, she’s practically eye level with me. I have nowhere else to look than those bright, green eyes.

  “I was waiting for you to tell me everything…I wanted to hear you could change. I want to try.”

  I laugh, “There’s no trying. If we do this, I’m not losing you again.”

  “So, what’s stopping you?” She ask. She studies my mouth, then she looked at me through hooded eyes.

  “Say the words when you’re sober,” I say.

  I take her by the waist and try to guide her away from me, but she stood firm.

  “Maybe I’m not brave enough then.”

  In a swift movement, I switch places with her. I push her against the wall. With my hands on either side of her, I leaned to her ear.

  “I’ll bring it up,” I whisper. I pull away from her and kiss her on the forehead. “Go with Lea tomorrow. I need to take care of a few things; we’ll talk when you get back.”

  “Fine,” she grumbles.

  She pokes her bottom lip out, and before I can talk some sense into myself, I kiss her. She moans in my mouth and I wrap my hands around her waist, pulling her closer.

  Fuck.

  I pull away. “I’ll let you get ready for bed.”

  Her face falls as I walk out of the closet and close the door. Not ready to leave her, I sit on her bed and wait. Moments later, the door opens and she walks out wearing only a t-shirt. I looked away as she climbs in the bed.

  She rolls over and gets comfortable. Yawning, she asks, “Stay with me?”

  “Forever.”

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  Taylor

  I’m not sure if the pounding in my head or the pounding on my door woke me up first. I peek at the clock with one eye. Seven a.m., pulling the covers over my head, I tried to block out the sound. No such luck; my door opens, slamming into the wall.

  “Are you decent in here?” Lea asks.

  “Come in,” I say, sarcastically.

  “Oh my god, should I come back?”

  “What? No,” I say, confused.

  Out of habit, I hold the sheets up to my chest as I sit up and turn around. The color drains from my face when I see Hayze is passed out, fully clothed, next to me.

  “Are we still on for our trip?” She asks still standing at the door.

  I looked around the room then my eyes land on her. “What?”

  “Oh, Jesus Christ, Taylor. We’re leaving. Get ready. Grab your suitcase and meet me in the living room,” she says.

  Shaking her head, she close the door. I run in my closet and dress quickly before heading into the bathroom. I brush my teeth, scrub the make-up from my face, and make my hair presentable before meeting Lea.

  “Who packed for me?” I ask, pointing to the bag beside her.

  “You and Hayze went in your room early…To pack.”

  “Oh,” I say.

  I grab my bag and purse and stand by the door, anxious to get out of here.

  “Coffee?” Lea ask, handing a thermos to me.

  “Thanks.”

  As we walk to my car, my head is swimming. I’m not sure if it is the alcohol I consumed or the fear of the unknown. With what little experience I have, I know that at some point I would remember what happened. It would always be choppy and hazy, but I would have an idea.

  I’m anxious to make a decision. Whether it be to run, screaming, in another direction or finally put everything behind us. I don’t know, but I’m tired of going back and forth. I know I shouldn’t make a decision until the letters start rolling in. I can’t ask Hayze, with a clear conscious, to be with me if I don’t know what I’ll do this summer.

  When I applied for different universities, I had my mind set. Now I’m not so sure. If I get accepted to different colleges, and I want to go, I don’t want Hayze holding me back. I also don’t want to leave and hurt him. When I get the letters I could shove them in a drawer and just be happy to know I could leave without taking action. It’s better to hold out until I know.

  “Can you drive?” I ask Lea.

  “Sure,” she says. She catches the keys and slides in the driver seat. “Something on your mind?”

  I sit next to her and sighed. “I’m glad we’re getting away. I can’t think straight.”

  She drives out of the parking lot before she answers. “I knew the lines would get blurred.”

  “I guess I did, too. I just didn’t want to believe it.”

  She looks at me then back to the road. “I’m not downplaying what happened that night, but why not get back together. He’s done with that stuff.”

  “For now,” I say.

  “He’s never tried to quit…He’s never wanted to. I would tell you if I thought he couldn’t do it. I’ve always been honest with you.”

  I give her a pointed look. “Have you?”

  “As honest as I can be. His secrets aren’t mine to tell,” she says.

  “So, if I tell you something it stays with you?”

  “I don’t tell him anything we talk about,” she says.

  “Remember when you found me in the library?” I ask and she nods her head. “I applied for other universities over Christmas break…I was checking to see if I was accepted.”

  “Are you serious? Where?” She asked, her eyes were cutting to me as she glanced between and the road.

  I suck in a sharp breath; this is it. “One in Fort Worth, Waco, and Louisiana.”

  “Are you gonna tell him?”

  As she pulls to a stop light she looks at me, concerned. “Not right now. If I don’t get in, there’s nothing to worry about.”

  “But if you do get in, what are you gonna say? He’s gonna be mad you didn’t tell him.”

  “If I get in and decide to g
o, it’ll be for both of us. If I don’t see this going anywhere, he doesn’t need me hanging around here.”

  “Don’t leave because of him,” she says.

  “I’m not. When the time comes, I’ll know if I need to go.”

  She hit the steering wheel as the light turned. “I’m so over being in between you guys!”

  I roll my eyes. “What’s going on now?”

  “I’m sworn to secrecy, remember?” She says, throwing a dimpled grin my way. It’s weird how much she favors Hayze sometimes.

  As annoying as it is, I don’t push her. I wouldn’t want her to tell Hayze what I said.

  “What are we doing when we get there?” I ask, changing the subject. I don’t want to ruin the trip.

  “Dropping stuff off at the hotel and going to a concert tonight.”

  “What concert?” I ask.

  “Some Texas Country band. I’ve never heard of them, but I’m sure it’s good. Hayze knew what he was doing,” she laughs.

  “Hayze?”

  “What?” She looks at me, confused.

  “You said ‘Hayze knew what he was doing’…Was this his doing?”

  “Oh, didn’t mean to…I guess because we were talking about him.”

  Once upon a time I may have bought that. But not anymore. I don’t want to put her in the middle of it, so I don’t show her any indication that I don’t believe her.

  “Pull over at the next store,” I say.

  Her eyes land on me as she pulls into the parking lot.

  “Is everything alright?” She asks.

  “Yeah, I need food,” I lie.

  I walked inside the desolate convenient store and find the restroom. Pushing the door open with my foot, I scan the space. Finding that it was useable, I walk in. I lock the single stall and pull my cell phone from my pocket. Angrily, I type the numbers in my phone, and he answers on the first ring.

  “You guys there yet?” He asks. His voice is tired and there was no sound in the background, making me think I woke him.

  “We’ll get back to that. Did anything happen last night?” I ask, holding my finger out in front of me, stopping him as if he could see me.

  “No, you were sloppy drunk.”

  I sigh, frustrated and relieved at the same time. “What did we do then? Talk?”

  “That’s about it. You ask me stay with you, so I did,” he says.

  “Okay,” I breathe out a sigh of relief.

  “We’ll talk about it when you get back. You guys there?”

  I look around the grimy stall, confused. “What’s there to talk about? You said nothing happened.”

  “You said a lot of shit.”

  I slap my forehead with my free hand. I’m never drinking again. “What did I say?”

  “Just stuff about us. I don’t want to do this over the phone,” he says.

  “Great, something else to stress about,” I say, nervously raking my fingers through my hair.

  He laughs, “It’s nothing to stress over.”

  “Did you ask Lea to get me away for a few days?”

  “No,” he says; his voice was sharp.

  I roll my eyes. “I think you did.”

  “Why do you ask?”

  “I just have a feeling.”

  “Well, I didn’t,” he says, defensively.

  “I thought we were going to be honest with each other now.”

  He sighs and something crashes in the background. “Fuckin’ Lea. Can you just trust me and drop it?”

  “Yeah…That’s not gonna happen.”

  “I want you far away from all of this shit, but you always land yourself right in the middle,” he says.

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Joel’s startin’ a bunch of shit…The guy I use to deal for paid me a visit. I wanted you gone until they worked it out.”

  This is a punch in the gut and a relief all in the same. I’ve wanted so desperately for him to be honest, but when he says these things I wonder why I wanted that in the first place. His problems are different…Much worse than others.

  “Are you okay?”

  “They won’t touch me,” he says and I could hear the smile in his voice.

  “I don’t like this, Hayze.”

  “I know, baby. That’s why I didn’t tell you.”

  “I want you to tell me everything.”

  I lean against the stall, wondering where we go from here. The lines are getting blurred and my head is clustered and confused. The main door to the bathroom opens and I stand up straight.

  “Is everything okay? You’ve been in there for a while,” Lea says as she knocked on the stall.

  “I’ll call you back,” I say and end the call despite his protest coming from the speaker. I open the stall and walk out to Lea. “I’m fine.”

  She looks at me strange. “Who was that on the phone?”

  I open the door and hold it as she walks out. “Wrong number.”

  She smirks. “Do you always call wrong numbers back? Or just when you’re lying?”

  “Both,” I laugh. I grab a bag of chips and a coke before taking it to the register. I hand my money to the cashier and move for Lea to pay for her food. “Food isn’t included in the giveaway?”

  “How mad is he?” She grabs the bag and walks behind me to the car.

  “He sounded relieved actually.”

  When we got the car, Lea wasted no time getting out of the parking lot, and I couldn’t help but feel sorry for her. Once again, she was put in between her best friend and her brother.

  “I’m sorry. I didn’t tell him what you said. I just told him I knew he had something to do with this,” I say.

  “It’s fine, Tay,” she says. She smiles and pops a chip her mouth.

  “He was honest with me when I called him out.”

  She blew her bangs from her eyes and pushed sunglasses on her face. “He’s scared of you.”

  “Scared of me? Really, Lea?” I laugh.

  “No, seriously. He doesn’t have to do that shit to me. He doesn’t lie to me; he tells me everything up front. He does that with all of the family…He always has. Want to know why? We aren’t going anywhere. He could actually lose you and that scares the shit out of him. You have him by the balls, use it.”

  “As much as I’d like to continue this conversation, can we not?”

  “Maybe you should sleep the rest of the way. We’re gonna be out late.”

  “Lea, I’m hungover,” I whine

  “Nothin’ a few drinks won’t help. Sleep!” Her voice is thick with authority, but she smiles. Sleep actually doesn’t sound like a bad idea. I lean my chair back and my heavy eyes take over.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN

  Hayze

  As if driving three hours to see a girl isn’t weird enough, I stand watching her dance across the bar from me. The music is shitty, but she is enjoying herself. I’m not sure why I came. I got in my car to drive around and take my mind off things and ended up here.

  Lea walks up to her and hands her a drink. Three douchebags come up behind her; Lea regards them as if she knows them and introduces them to Taylor. She politely speaks to them, but one of them is being too friendly. He kept talking to her, and I could tell she’s getting uncomfortable. I grab my untouched beer from the table and stalk over.

  When I got close, she looks my way and her jaw drop with surprise. “Um…Hi?”

  I take her in my arms to show the lingering fucker she’s mine. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve missed her, but I can’t hide my smile when the douchebag walks away with defeat.

  “You forgot to call me back,” I say with a smirk.

  “Even more of a reason to not show up here,” she says, laughing.

  “C’mon now, is that anyway to talk to the guy that sent you on this trip?”

  She takes a step from me. Shocked, but laughing, she replies, “You act like this wasn’t for you.”

  I shrug, “Maybe I was having second th
oughts about sending you away. I missed you.”

  She smiles and walks to a table near us. I follow behind her and take the seat near her. The music is low as the roadie switched the band’s equipment.

  “You aren’t tired of me yet?”

  “Never,” I say, turning my attention back to her.

  She leans in, her face is lined with concern. “Did something happen?”

  I shake my head. “Stop freaking out. Joel will get the shit beat out of him and he may get brave and come at me.”

  Her eyebrows shoot up. “Is that supposed to make me feel better?”

  “Joel’s nothing I can’t handle.”

  “I know…. I just worry about the other guys.” She watches me with concern. As much as I hate to see her worried, I smile. There was a time I never thought she’s be in the same room with me again.

  I take her hands in mine and lean in. “They won’t do anything to me. They have no reason to. I’m out.”

  She nods and pulls her hands back. Lea walks to my side with two shots. “Stalker.”

  “I wouldn’t have to show up if you didn’t throw men at Taylor as soon as I’m out of the picture,” I say, only half joking.

  “Don’t take it personal. She just needed to flirt for a few drinks,” she says, winking at Taylor.

  “I gave you more than enough,” I start, but she cut me off.

  “Kidding! You really think I’m like that?” She holds her hand over her heart, pretending to be offended. She takes the seat next to Taylor and gives her the shot.

  “Hayze needs a drink,” Taylor says, offering me the glass.

  I shake my head. “I’ve gotta drive back.”

  “Drink up,” Lea encourages.

  Taylor tosses back the shot and slams the glass on the table. As the band comes back on stage, I stand up and offered her my hand. She takes her bottom lip in her mouth, nodding. That is all the encouragement I need, I put my hand on her back and lead her out to the open space.

  “Do you even know how to dance?” She asks.

  “I’ve been told I’m pretty good,” I say and she frowned.

  “Good evenin’ Houston,” the emcee’s voice booms through the speakers. His fake, southern drawl gets worse as he introduces the band members.

  When the music starts, the shitty, off-beat tune doesn’t bother me anymore. I pulled her in my arms and lead her to the tune. I spin her out and she steps on my feet as she comes back in.